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File 134883348848.png - (110.60KB , 250x351 , 250px-Medic_taunt_laugh.png )
13199 No. 13199 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply]
I was checking out the new items, and I really loved both the looks and the description of the Distinguished Rogue. I started thinking about my favourite descriptions, and wondering about other people's.

So, what are your favourite item descriptions? Just the description, it doesn't matter if you like the hat/misc or not. Descriptions of physical items from the Valve Store are fine, too.

Here are mine. It wasn't easy to pick just a few, there are many more descriptions I love. But I figure that's the same for everybody, and if each of us starts listing half the TF2 inventory this will be a boring thread. Let's only list our absolutely very favourite ones.

-Distinguished Rogue. This coat does so much of the heavy lifting to make you look like a sophisticated man of espionage, you won't need to wear anything else at all. Watch those heads turn the next time you attend a fancy gala completely nude except for a coat. So jealous. How about that guy calling the police? Is HE jealous? Yeah he is.

No comment here. Just perfection.

-Ninja Cowl. If there's one thing that the ladies/men love, it's mystery. And what's more mysterious than covering your entire face with a Ninja Cowl? "Oh my, I can't see any of that man's face!" they'll exclaim. "He must have a terrible secret I will uncover with my love."

I love how this description both makes fun of trite romance tropes, and outright states that Spy has male admirers. I mean, sure, that's obvious, but how many FPSs would openly admit that?

-Stovepipe Sniper Shako. This hat is perfect for the sniper who likes to hide in the shadows, then run suddenly from those shadows to go lead a parade.
Message too long. Click here to view the full text.
12 posts and 3 images omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 13224
>>13223
Yes, that was the whole point of my second paragraph ^^. I've totally switched to the headcanon that Medic pranks his own respawn-able teammates (or, at worst, the Messangers; civilian deaths upset me, but I can't say that I give a damn about the guys who were going to assassinate Soldier and then threatened the Mercs' families).


Anyway, my comment was only meant as a short explanation for my personal reaction, since the previous poster had been wondering about the reason some people were upset. I am a bit concerned about starting actual discussions because I'm worried that people will end up fighting. Can we go back to the topic, please?

Here is another description I love:

<b>Demoman portrait poster</b>. <i>A lot of important people in the world have worn eye patches. James Joyce, Marie Colvin, that guy from Days of our Lives. There are so many people in fact that it might be worth making a Wall of One-Eyes in your apartment so you can keep track of them all. Let's start you off with Demoman, and then you can get that framed picture of Dangermouse you saw at the thrift store. This is important. We're counting on you. </i>
>> No. 13234
I almost forgot:

Pyrovision Goggles: Enter a world of imagination that's far superior to the crap-ass world of imagination you get from books.
>> No. 13275
Lucky Shot-Let's see you do that again, Private.

I can only read this in Soldier's voice and I keep thinking up a hilarious scenario for the line too.

The Stereoscopic Shades-If you close one eye, one of the teams will disappear. So don't do that.

I admit putting on a pair and closing one eye, just knowing I did that makes it x10 funnier.


File 134945454910.jpg - (26.12KB , 578x573 , internetmagic.jpg )
13230 No. 13230 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply]
http://en.genzu.net/sokan/star.shtml

I have no idea what drives the correlations, but the results are always hilarious, occasionally eerily accurate, and every once in a while you get a surprising gem, too.
9 posts and 7 images omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 13253
File 13507513505.jpg - (47.97KB , 602x602 , Medicsthewinnerbecausehedoesnthavetobebestfriendsw.jpg )
13253
>>13252

Jesus, it is pretty accurate, isn't it?

...Why is there so little Demoman, guys. Why.

(Why did I pick the unpopular classes to like the most we need more Demo/Everybody Solly/Everybody and Engie/Everybody.)
>> No. 13255
>>13252
The trucks n vans instance is increasing I think. That's actually a pretty interesting graph. I haven't ever see a large amount of Sniper/Medic.
>> No. 13257
>>13255
I agree. At the time, there seemed to be quite a lot of Sniper/Medic, but, come to think of it, I haven't seen much in recent months.


File 134635915319.png - (70.18KB , 250x279 , FuckingDemo.png )
12884 No. 12884 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply]
If Valve gave you the opportunity to choose a pairing to become canon who would you choose?
no ship wars please
42 posts and 1 image omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 13111
All I have to go on is my own preferences and headcanons for Scout's mom, and in my head I think she'd say no if Spy came to her and disguised as Scout for a fetish-y thing, but really, I have no idea. I'd like to see more background on her.

I do know she was mentioned again in the flavor text of the new Scout pistol, the mafia one, but nobody seemed to notice that.
>> No. 13112
>>13111

I had no idea there was a blurb for this thing, thank you!
>> No. 13235
I think it would be pretty cool if Valve went against the odds and just had a little moment between Sniper and Engineer. They kind of fit the 'Those two guys' trope and it would be pretty amazing if during a big scene they teased at Heavy/Medic and Sniper/Spy but then Mundy just suddenly takes Dell in his scrawy hairy arms and they share a small kiss and all the other mercenaries look really fucking surprised/shocked.


File 134817183783.jpg - (142.99KB , 612x431 , WW2 hats.jpg )
13146 No. 13146 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply]
Was on Tumblr just now. The majority of people think this was a huge mistake for valve to put these hats out (especially the Medic "German commander" hat). Opinions?

I actually liked them until I thought about the unfortunate implications, and now I just feel uncomfortable...
39 posts and 3 images omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 13198
>>13197
I may be wrong, but I believe that was a joke.
>> No. 13225
File 13493434735.png - (366.82KB , 1003x703 , Heavy_Artillery_Officer's_Cap.png )
13225
I think it was a huge mistake to position them so fucking stupidly on their heads. Ruined two perfectly good hats.
>> No. 13226
>>13225
They probably thought that the standard position would have looked too much like the Team Captain.


File 133946436160.jpg - (27.17KB , 468x444 , Carmen-sandiego.jpg )
12251 No. 12251 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [First 100 posts] [Last 50 posts]
Just noticed the old one is autosaging, so this thread is for anything not Demoman-related. For that, go to http://tf2chan.net/dis/res/12084.html I had a headcanon idea that was just driving me crazy and I had to spit it out. And it's going to sound stupid as fuck.

Scout's Mom is Carmen Sandiego. She settled down for a bit, cut her hair, died it black, and adopted five kids to give the illusion she'd been there a while. And ended up having three more kids on accident.

And that's part of the reason she and spy "get along" so well - because she knows him on more levels than one. Maybe she was even tempted to go out adventuring with him again? Who the fuck knows idkidkidk

If you have any other general headcanon ideas, go ahead - nothing can quite get sillier than that.
207 posts and 19 images omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 13256
File 135079335737.png - (729.48KB , 1280x744 , meetthemedic_viktorfrankenstein.png )
13256
>>watching Ed Wood
>>he's terrible at a thing he's passionate about and goes after it with giddy enthusiasm
>>crossdresses and doesn't give a fuck what people think
>>fascinated by mad scientists and monsters and morbid things
>>writes a speech for Bela Lugosi about wanting to make monsters and being unable to go back to his homeland and wanting to make a superhuman race
>>tells a European bald hairy wrestler he's handsome

Reminds me eerily of Medic.
>> No. 13313
According to YouTube, Merasmus doesn't really have that dramatic magical voice, he's just speaking into one of those plastic echo microphones from the 90's. Also, he is the Monarch from The Venture Bros.

I'm okay with this.
>> No. 13315
i watched Léon, The Proffesional the other day.

theres a part where he says that the better the assasin, the closer he can get to his target and how you start at the sniper rifle and work your way down to the knife.

because of that i now believe that Spy is actually a better sniper than Sniper is


File 13394380789.jpg - (26.82KB , 500x375 , 6a00e54f10a0988834014e8ac3a690970d.jpg )
12247 No. 12247 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply] [First 100 posts] [Last 50 posts]
So... since the other thread has saged, I shall continue here. So, I was on DA today, and a new group for TF2 popped up that I hadn't seen before, called TF2 necrophilia. I figured, okay, let's see what kind of artists and art are there. I wasn't all that disappointed that it's really mostly drawn in the necrophilia style- that's about what I expected, and not really my thing for TF2. But there's a list of pictures by character. And of course, Demoman doesn't have one (yet). Pyro has one, but it's empty (what a surprise). First three characters represented in folders? The usual suspects: Scout, Spy, Sniper. Now, not all the art was necrophilia-ified, and there actually was a picture of Demo with Heavy (I think). And Engie, Heavy and Medic (with Solly) were the next three folders. But... No Demoman? No Pyro? I was faintly horrified, but it holds true to my "Demoman is too many, too drunk and too black for most necrophilia fangirls" idea. Sad to see it confirmed, though.
205 posts and 12 images omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 13241
I'm not sure if this belongs here, but I think it's funny nonetheless.

I think it's hilarious when people in this fandom freak out over porn.
>> No. 13247
>>13241
Depends on the reason. If they're freaking out because they don't like porn of TF2 specifically, or are horrified that men are being shipped together/might possibly be gay, they're idiots.

If they're freaking out about porn period because they're either very sheltered or grew up with very stern, religious parents like I did, it's understandable.
>> No. 13348
File 13519198024.jpg - (94.96KB , 293x312 , spynon.jpg )
13348
>>people who claim fanart from 2009 is fanart for their fanfiction they wrote in 2011
>>or that a picture the artist drew for themselves is fanart of their OC


File 134737321150.jpg - (1.40KB , 100x70 , question.jpg )
13076 No. 13076 Locked hide watch expand quickreply [Reply]
I just want to ask a few questions about the rules. 1.It says in the rules that memes aren't allowed on the site, do Sparkledog Central memes count or does the rule apply to all memes? The TF2 Kink Meme is a good example of a Sparkledog Central Meme because most deviant art memes follow a "fill in the blank with an answer to the following question/order above" formula. Which brings me to my next question.

2.What counts as a meme on TF2Chan? There are the obvious like lolcats, Rage Comics, and planking, but what do you guys consider a meme here so I know how to be careful?

and finally, 3.If you don't allow memes, then why do you have a Sparkledog Central Meme on your site? (The TF2 Kink Meme). Because if you don't allow them, it seems a little contradicting to have a Sparkledog Central Meme on the site.

I'm just curious is all so I don't do anything that can break the rules. I hope you don't mind.

(STOP. JUST STOP)
9 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 13088
File 134743025147.jpg - (57.92KB , 500x524 , tumblr_lzq65g6eil1qcz380.jpg )
13088
Do we really need an entire fucking thread about what constitutes as an acceptable use of memes?

Fucking really?
>> No. 13089
File 134743374224.jpg - (16.96KB , 250x362 , transmetropolitan-chairlegoftruth_s.jpg )
13089
You know what? Fuck it.

This thread does not belong in /dis/. It is not discussion TF2 and would be better placed in /inception/, but really it shouldn't even be a fucking thread at all. You have questions about how the site operates? Write to a mod. Many of us have our email accounts in our posts and we even have an official Tumblr you can submit questions to.

And for God's sake, LURK MORE. You seem to be so absolutely clueless as to how the chan functions but if you actually just observed what other people are posting, you would not even have to ask these questions in the first place.

It is really not that hard and I don't know how much longer I can put up with this shitposting.
>> No. 13090
>>13089

Shit I should add that the TF2chan mod tumblr can be found here: http://asktf2chanmods.tumblr.com/

Now scram.


File 134713359378.jpg - (159.37KB , 1680x1050 , epicc.jpg )
13026 No. 13026 hide watch quickreply [Reply]
most epic tradepost in history of mankind, just 1 min ago.
>> No. 13053
Wait, what? Did I miss something about a new commodity in the game, or does he literally mean he'll write a nice compliment about what a great person you are if you give him shit? Sounds like a ripoff to me.


File 134646228291.png - (66.34KB , 184x268 , 130540486856.png )
12917 No. 12917 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply]
(I was unsure where to put this, so move it if it needs to be)

It's pretty straight forward I guess, what is your favorite track from the Team Fortress 2 soundtrack, and why? Which do you dislike? What about it do you like, and a why do you dislike a different one?

Personally, I am a fan of 'The Calm' and 'ROBOTS!' (MvM), 'Medic!' and 'A little Heart to Heart' (Meet the Medic), and 'More Gun' (Meet the Engineer). I guess the main reason is for how dramatic the songs get, and in the MtM songs, how 'crazy' they get, the faster violin and whatnot.

(Also, if anyone knows where tracks 14 through 18 ("Medic!", "Archimedes", "Dreams of Cruelty", "The Calm", "ROBOTS!") are located in the game files, could you post? the rest are in the ui folder)
3 posts omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 12941
>>12921
I set up a download if you're still looking for the song. My boyfriend made me a very nice youtube extractor and I figure more people might want the song. http://minus.com/ljT2mIogw9Iyz
>> No. 12947
I love Rocket Jump Waltz, I just wish it were longer in the official version.

I don't like the Haunted Fortress 2 theme but I hardly hear it anyways.
>> No. 12948
>>12941
That's nifty, didn't know there was that track at all.

I was actually looking for "Medic!", "The Calm," and "robots!", but thank you!


File 134634393096.jpg - (180.46KB , 764x1023 , IMG_1062.jpg )
12882 No. 12882 hide watch expand quickreply [Reply]
Am I the only one who seems to suffer from Glossophobia (fear of public speaking) when it comes to voice chat servers? See, I don't have much experience with public speaking. the written word I don't have much trouble with, but actual speaking? that's a whole different ball game for me.

I've never been on a TF2Chan servers, I'm sure they're fun, It's just when you take my lack of time with the game mixed with Glossophobia and inexperience, you can see why I have some issues with Public Speaking.

So if you guys have any advice for overcoming my fears, I would love to hear it. because I would love to play with you guys someday.

picture courtesy of Photobucket.
1 post omitted. Click Reply to view.
>> No. 12896
Thank You Very Much, I feel better now.

And just so you all know, I go by Midnight Leo on Steam because truth be told, Jewel_Pandora is actually the username I use for my adult fan art and fiction. I go by a different name for my less racy work on Deviant Art and Tumblr.

I thought I'd tell you guys beforehand. Just in case.
>> No. 12908
If you are on a random server start by calling out game-related things (ie: ___ is spy or sentry ahead). When you get comfy with talking try asking how everyone is doing when you connect to a server. Congratulating everyone at the end of a game or thanking someone for something is a surefire way to make friends.
>> No. 12913
Thanks, Forky. I'm starting to feel better now.

I'll do my best to keep up with everyone on the mantrain. here's to the maintrain server, may it continue to serve it's many visitors in the future.


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