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File 133640209226.jpg - (70.97KB , 500x552 , Feelings_o_85947.jpg )
12000 US No. 12000
Holy shit, last thread got a little too big. Time for a new one, guys!
Expand all images
>> US No. 12001
12k GET? Also,I want that book.
>> US No. 12002
Nice GET, OP.
>> BR No. 12004
So here i am!
>> BR No. 12005
Lol What, so...sorry the spam, but looks like my ban vanished, hehe.
>> US No. 12006
yeah,sorry, we thought you were this other dude when you weren't.
>> US No. 12007
Woke up this morning to realize that, not only did I leave both my binder and my wallet at my boyfriend's house, but that I only had enough gas to get me TO school (or boyfriend's house, same distance) but not back. So I just went and hung out with him for a little while.

Not sure why, but something is telling me that I just really wasn't supposed to go to school today. It probably sounds like a really dumb attempt at wishful thinking, but... I can't shake the feeling that something was trying to stop me from going.

Oh well, didn't miss anything important anyway!
>> US No. 12008
So I'm moving to Tennissee, because my father has gifted me a house.

You know what this means?

>> BR No. 12011

Excuse me, Eudevier, but i can't post in the adult fanfiction board because apparently i am still banned. Can you help me?
>> US No. 12012
wait a second, arn't you 15? how'd you get unbanned?!
>> BR No. 12014
File 13365328634.jpg - (114.56KB , 986x591 , raisins.jpg )

But you just said you realized your mistake...

You said it >>12006

Oh lord. This is minding my fuck.

(What am i suppose to do? Should i appeal anyway?)
>> US No. 12015
File 133653496251.gif - (119.78KB , 500x500 , 4aec6aa0-2caa-4c7d-890f-e9a383391641.gif )

Oh, God, this is hilarious and depressing at the same time.

Stay strong, Error.
>> US No. 12016
http://watch-me-ris3.tumblr.com/ is this your tumblr?
I thought for a second you were someone else. you're not. the person I was thinking of was another guy.
>> BR No. 12018

So, this is one of the mistakes. I don't own a tumblr, hehe. In terms of social network, i have my steam account and Google+(or some shit, i don't use it).

I suppose you see in it i'm not underage, though: my account is from past year, when the Google+ wasn't allowing underaged people.

So, i guess everything is settled down right? Can i now post at the Adult Boards, pretty please?

(Btw, the mistake was fuckin' funny lol. I mean...the dude whom you guys mistook me is pretty weird, hehe.)
>> US No. 12019
it should let you post now.
>> AU No. 12021
File 133659814682.jpg - (43.61KB , 500x382 , 132984225847.jpg )
>not posting anymore
>clearly still here
>suddenly posting just to stir shit

stay classy TR
>> BR No. 12022

Positive, i just did it. Thank ya for the help!
>> US No. 12023
File 133662171227.jpg - (68.33KB , 500x386 , hella oh wow.jpg )
Who said I wasn't posting anymore? I never said that. Sure, I may not be posting as much, but then again, who is? I'm still amused by the fact that I've done nothing to you - hardly even acknowledged your existence, and yet you feel a need to give a snarky reply to every little thing I say.

stay classy? Never planned on stopping. Looks like you could take a note, though.
>> AU No. 12026
File 133665199770.png - (158.06KB , 400x223 , 1318516616943.png )
>Who said I wasn't posting anymore? I never said that.
i can make my own observations
>Sure, I may not be posting as much, but then again, who is?
I am
>I'm still amused by the fact that I've done nothing to you - hardly even acknowledged your existence
thats the thing about posting i public, you dont have to acknowledge someone for them to read what you post
>and yet you feel a need to give a snarky reply to every little thing I say.

>1 post

>stay classy? Never planned on stopping. Looks like you could take a note, though.
thou doth protest too much, mehtinks
>> US No. 12027
eh,it's just his personality. he does it to me as well sometimes in steam chat.
Mom has tomorrow off instead of Sunday, so after work today we're gonna have her dinner(I'm making steak,bakers,corn, and croissants)
also custom'd a card where the front has a sleeping mom on a couch mumbling "you missed a spot, let me get that for you." with one of the two kids remarking "Wow!Mom even thinks about us in her sleep!"
Open the card and the mom is dreaming about a hot guy on a beach. used an exacto-knife to put Thor's head on there since she fangirled over him so much.

>> US No. 12032
File 133676737435.gif - (88.67KB , 325x245 , GhostRiderJerkingOffPlaystation3Games.gif )

>> BR No. 12033

So, i heard you thought i was underage, so you could permaban me.


Okay, okay, i hope you have some sense of humor.
So, you really didn't read my opinions, any single one of them, and jumped to that conclusion? Or you just don't get what i said (is my english that bad)? Because, you know, you banned me...well, basically because i don't think like you.

Can you...you know, care to explain this? I don't intend to fight or be impolite with you, don't worry, i just want to understand. I hope there's no problem at all if you, or any other mod, could clarify this to me. It's just a question.
>> US No. 12034
Sorry! that was our bad! I forgot to tell Ashe to look at the feelings thread.
>> BR No. 12035

Haha, don't worry, i noticed that. It happens, it's no big deal.

But now i was banned again...and i just don't think the reason is ...well, fair. I know it's just temporary, but... well,anyway, i just want to clarify stuff.

(I really don't want to make a mess, though. I just want to talk).
>> DE No. 12037
File 133683699728.gif - (428.42KB , 245x200 , feeling heeh.gif )
I don´t want to rely on the fact that alcohol is one thing which let´s me relax and brings me in a good mood.

Good things which happened: Fuck yeah i have a insurance again. God i´m happy, let me kill my liver now.

Didn´t talk to a friend of mine for quite a while now. Which let´s me feel unbalanced somehow. I´m not used to be the sarcastic part in our dynamic.

My body hates me and punishes me with pain, feeling nausea and like i would collapse any moment.

I can´t bring myself to feel much anymore and i don´t want. I´m really really tired of feelings so i just try to act against them or surpress it.

Getting still guilt tripped easily. Goes so far i don´t even want to talk anymore out of fear people get offended by the smallest sentence.

Fuck life.
>> CA No. 12038
Got my hair cut. Images to follow soon, but feelings first.

Holy shit I can feel the wind on my neck. I haven't felt that in more than ten years.
13 inches of hair, gone. Goodness. I feel good about it, though. Some little girl with cancer will get a nice wig, and I have a snazzy new haircut.
>> GB No. 12039
File 133684665767.jpg - (30.97KB , 500x290 , tumblr_lo52nu81A71qjvxfho1_500.jpg )
<--- Novi and I.
Sciencing it up.
>> US No. 12042
File 133687262963.jpg - (8.18KB , 224x225 , mewtwo really.jpg )
>1 post

Okay, really? Are we REALLY doing this now?


And that's just all the ones I could remember off the top of my head. So, in short, I'd just appreciate it very much if you would stop talking to me in general, kthnx, because just the sight of your name pisses me off.

I don't even know what your problem is - I used to like you (especially your gmod stuff), but I guess you've started flaming me since that little dispute, in an idiotic attempt to get in good graces with the mods (?) and become one yourself. Or maybe you got a really bad papercut, but didn't notice until you rubbed on some hand sanitizer. Who the fuck knows. I don't care. I just want you to kindly step off.

Ugh. I'm in such a pissy mood today. Work was a nightmare. Had people flooding in to get some last-minute, half-assed Mother's day shit (along with all the other weekend regulars), and breaks kept coming late, and lines were five people long. I swear, I almost started having a panic attack. I love my job, I love my customers, and I love people, but maybe I have a fear of crowds or something - iunno - cause I was ALL wound up. I swear - is you put a lump of coal up my ass, I'd squeeze it into a diamond in ten seconds flat. Also, when I got home, mom asked me to water the lawn for some reason, even though it was raining. That was all sorts of embarrassing. People kept looking at me as they drove by. There was this one really nice lady, though, who complimented our yard, which was nice.

I can't wait to sleep in tomorrow. I hope mom doesn't drag me to church in the morning. Even though I'd rather kill a rabbit with nothing but my bare hands and teeth, there's no way I could say no, especially with it being mother's day and all. Here's hoping she forgets I don't have work until the evening.

Also, I should probably get some sleep - I sound deranged.
>> US No. 12043
Fuck, that was me.
>> AU No. 12045
i probably would have replied the same way, no matter who had posted those. its nothing personal, but they fact that they're all replying to you probably says more about you than me

>get in good graces with the mods (?) and become one yourself
oh please, they know me too well for that
>> US No. 12046
He's right. he's only mod on mancraft and that's because he plays on it more and we can undo shenanigans with worldedit. He was only gonna become a mod if the Mayans were right. which actually it turns out they found another calendar making it longer than 2012, so yeah,unless the chan and him are immortal, he will never become a mod.
onto feels: seriously body wtf, wake up with sinus headache,neckache, AND hiccups? what are you even doing. stop.
>> US No. 12048
Basically these bans act as part of a filter between whiny fanbrat behavior and desired behavior on the chan. "don't like,don't read" is heavily suggestive of fanbrat behavior. only time "don't like don't read" is acceptable is going into an adult thread when you don't like adult stuff to begin with. or if you hate a particular pairing and go up in there and raise a fuss.
When people who /like/ rapefic even think a fic is terrible, "don't like don't read" sounds very childish.
>> BR No. 12052

But in the case that was being discussed at the Adult Board, about the fanfic (you know, probably, hehe), i was explaining that the expression could be used in that cases when you don't like a TYPE of fanfiction, more or less like in the example you gave. People weren't enjoying the way the writer was portraiting the characters, and the only reason they were giving is that because they can't see them in that way, which does not explain a thing because...you know... no one around here owns the canon things of the game, much less the fandom. When they complain that the characters were too superficial and there weren't no development, they were right. But when they start to say that the fanfic is not good just because they can't see them that way...well, makes no sense as a criticism. That's the point i was trying to explain (and btw, no one was getting it).

The mod who banned me not only didn't try to understand this pretty obvious point, but also didn't talk to me to explain why i was wrong, to refute my opinions, to try to prove himself right, etc etc. Like you just did. Like it's suppose to happen in a good conversation. He just wanted me to be quiet.

Apparently, he's unable to hold a conversation against a different point of view that he disagrees, in a mature way, without abusing power(oh lord, this is funny), don't you agree?

This is pretty childish by itself.
>> US No. 12054
actually, yes they did:
""Don't like, don't read" is /never/ a valid argument to ignore criticism. If you genuinely think it is, go back to Sparkledog Central and their hugbox; we deal in constructive criticism and acceptable debate rather than 24/7 asspats."
>> BR No. 12055

First: he said it AFTER he banned me. So, after the punishment was already made. During the conversation set in the board, he never said a word to me.

Second: this isn't a retort to any of my opinions. He didn't take in count the reasons i gave why is reasonable not to take your on personal view of the characters in an argument against a fanfic because it makes no sense, since it's individual pov.

Third: He didn't even take in consideration that i said, at least twice, that all the other reasons that people are doing the criticism about that fanfiction were good points (meaning, then, that i agree with well made criticisms).

Fourth: srsly, am i making myself clear about the opinion towards the characterization and individuals imagination stuff? Is my english that bad? Or you guys don't want to discuss the point i'm making at all? I mean, i'm doing it not just because i don't agree with some of the stuff that have been discussed in the adult fanfiction board, but also because my pov about the characters is completely different from the majority of the fandom. So, even if i write nice fanfictions, you will all say for me to erase the whole thing and change everything just because we-can't-see-the-characters-the-way-you-do-so-your-story-is-not-good.

It would be a shame. I mean, don't you guys agree that the more different and unique interpretations of the characters we have, more nice fanfiction (porn porn pooorn fuckin good porn) we'll have around here?

(btw, Eudevie, i'm really glad that at least you seems to be willing to discuss. Thank ya, so, i guess).
>> US No. 12056
>First: he said it AFTER he banned me. So, after the punishment was already made. During the conversation set in the board, he never said a word to me.
that was the reason given for the ban, on the ban report. That is how bans work.
Characterization notwithstanding, people have a right to say if they think something is out of character or not. discouraging such is highly frowned upon here.
>> US No. 12057
also, your ban is over tomorrow. any further discussion in this thread would further derail it. Please leave anything more in the ask box under "ask the mods" on the front page.
>> BR No. 12058

Hum...okay, i'll give it a shot later, then.

I hope it works.
>> US No. 12059
So I've finally gotten nearly everything worked out as far as moving out goes. I've got rent money, a decent chunk of start-up cash, a car, a phone and plan, and a solid job. All I gotta do now is actually get an apartment. Time to start applying!

Only thing left to do besides that is find car insurance... gotta go in and talk to an agent. Hopefully that accident won't make it TOO much higher.

All boyfriend's gotta do is get his ID and get a job, but easier said than done, given the DMV has the wrong social security number in their system or some shit. I'm not sure what he means by that but it's a pain in the ass to fix apparently.
>> AU No. 12063
File 133698933413.jpg - (32.77KB , 302x300 , 1694.jpg )
>> DE No. 12064
File 133699640724.gif - (448.45KB , 500x275 , summertime.gif )
> trying to meet up with friends
> need to distract self of bad feelings
> gosh i´m so excited, i´m going to prepare for it days before it happens so that it will be all jolly sitting together and...
> friends all say no than on the day it was planned

I wish i had the energy to just sit there and sob. Whhhhyyyyy. But the world doesn´t care. Also friends don´t really care if i´m heartbroken and emotional wounded, but still come to me with their problems. Yeah for that i´m good enough, but wanting to just have some funtime with me without going into a emotional festival isn´t good enough.

Still can´t talk to friend until wednesdays. Need to go to doc on thursday to get recipt for other doc.

Stay away from alcohol in the moment. Stay far far far away from it.
>> US No. 12065
I hate that someone I know keeps telling me there my best friend but actually doesn't give a shit about me.

It took me forever to realize she only considered me her best friend for the moment, instead of, you know, being her best friend for the sake of being her best friend.

I just really wish she meant it. Like actually meant it. I know you can have more than one best friend and all that jazz, but when you tell some one that they ARE one of those friends, you should mean it. You really really should because to some people that mean a lot to them.
>> US No. 12066
Maybe they've been busy or sick as of late. They might really like you, after all, but they're doing a shitty way of showing it.

I know I've been in that boat myself as of late, and I worry I'm becoming the person who looks like they don't care, but I do.
>> US No. 12067

Hey, this is the anon from before. Thanks, I've been wondering that as of late.

I just want to feel needed I guess, and part of me is worried I'm gonna be like....one of those really sad old people who are alone and have a bunch of cats.

Except the cats aren't friendly like other peoples cats. They just pee everywhere like jerks.
>> US No. 12068
File 133704222827.png - (233.50KB , 531x356 , harmonyharmonyOHLOVE.png )

No problem. If you need someone to talk to, I can give you my Steam. I definitely know that feel, and I don't want anyone else having to go through it, alright?

You'll be alright.
>> US No. 12076
Watched some of my favorite funny videos with a buddy of mine who A.) is a bit of a perpetual frowner and B.) I've been struggling to find middle ground with for a while. He enjoyed them and laughs were had, so I can say that it's been a pretty good day.

I know the feeling, dudes. I find it hard to keep a steady group of friends, much less try not to take it very personally and seriously if we don't see each other for a while, even though I know that, logically, we all have our own legitimate reasons for not seeing each other. If you'd like, I could share my skype/email. I'm not around often on either, but I'd be more than willing to listen when I am. Just, whatever you do, don't start resenting your friends, or yourself. It's alright to feel angry or sad, though, but hang in there, guys.
>> GB No. 12079
MCM is so soon and I haven't finished my bat. Excuse me while I freak out. Also my provisional driving licence came in the post today! Hybrid's gonna be on wheeeeeels yeah!
>> CA No. 12080
Lol incomplete cosplays. I have like a million things to sew and paint and glue and not enough tiiiiiiiime.
Con's a week from Friday though :D so much excite.
>> AU No. 12084
I hope the Large Hadron Collider can get to the bottom of how much wood that woodchuck would indeed propel if he had the capacity to.
>> GB No. 12088
I hope they never find the Higgs Boson.
Then I will have a valid excuse to not remember anything from high-school science classes: it will all be wrong.

(...I feel fine. 'N stuff. My college final project is due next week and my sketchbook isn't half as full as I need it to be. The project itself isn't half done either but that's fine because it's all about the process, right? I don't feel pressured anymore. All my best work is done at the very last moment, it's how I roll.)
>> US No. 12089
So, I'm living with my grandmother. I mowed well over an acre of land for that woman (with a pushmower) so she wouldn't have to, then when I ate at dinner, she called me fat. Thanks, Grandma.

Besides that, I've found that I'm jealous of my little sister. Se has a mother who would never hit her, MY father, who is an incredible person, she goes where she wants, she's adorable...and she makes me feel like shit when I'm too tired to run around with her.

Seriously, she knows just what buttons to push to make me feel like a terrible human. I mean, I'm sorry that I want time to myself to enjoy having internet again, and to talk to my girlfriend. I forgot that ALL of my time must be spent making Lil' Sis happy.

So, I feel fat and selfish. I suck.
>> PL No. 12092
Tomorrow my short lived facebook account which I used mostly for school stuff is gonna get deactivated, and I kinda sorta want to do a last minute reanimation, but at the same time I don't want to deal with some bullshit, yet I sorta do (that's why I plainly just hadn't un-liked buncha peeps), even though it brought mostly more resentment towards some people I used to respect/wanted to keep a 'friendly' tab on.

Also sorta have the opportunity to move to US for 3months? I have a foster family already willing to take me in at least for the beginning, we'll see how it goes, this will def gonna be an awesome experience if it works out.
>> US No. 12094

you coming to the US Teapot? Welcome to the U.S. of A! Where there's lot of fatty foods and unhealthy eating. Kidding, it's not as extravagant as TV makes it seem, but seriously, deep fried Snickers? C'mon guys.

Something to know = Apparently, other countries view us as REEEEAAAAL freindly. Lot's of hugs - the land of the free hugs. Be prepared for lots of handshakes and "hiiii how arrrree youuuuu?" And if you take public transport...don't talk to people. Just don't. People on the bus are crazy. Wear headphones. Be assertive. Look disinterested in people.

Oh yeah, go to an all American diner. Get a burger and fries and a milkshake. Not at Mcdonalds. Get our trademark food done right! (If you go to Milwaukee Wi, go to Rock Bottom. It's a delicious, delicious restaurant.) Also, get the americanized version of your countries food. Go to Taco bell or get chinese or wherever your from. It'll be worth a laugh. Tastes good too!

Oh, and our news sources are stupid. Screw politics- there are free copies of The Onion in a lot of cities, pick up that!

I'm feeling patriotic now! I'm gonna go do something involving Soldier. I'm feeling suitably Solly today.
>> PL No. 12100
Oh hey thanks for the first hand tips! About the mp3 - already doing that after having to listen to four different life stories told by complete strangers including a total conspiracy nutjob, and helping old ladies get the groceries to their homes because goddamit, you can't say no there.

I'll keep all that in mind, although I'm kinda regretting the fact that I'll probably be stuck in North Carolina, and we all know how 'great' it is there now. As for local food my best bet would be to get it in Chicago or NY, but as far as I've heard it's at least good.
And when it comes to news feeds I already don't care about it here, just enough to know for whom to vote.
>> US No. 12101
File 133746013915.jpg - (747.52KB , 1920x1080 , 1337232713171.jpg )
FUCKING RELATIONSHIPS I don't know if i can get into them. There's this guy that likes me, and he's putting a -lot- of effort. Before I knew about his intentions, I was his friend for a year. I ignorantly thought he was just being a nice guy, but then it turns out that he likes me. And honestly, I think he'd make a great boyfriend, but the thought of putting myself in a relationship makes me want to run the other way. I don't know if I can open myself up to someone.

I feel like I should just jump into the relationship sea and see where that takes me but I also feel like ignoring the whole issue until it goes away.
>> GB No. 12103
Ah this ship, lets sail it shall we?
You know the guy, he is genuinely making an effort for you, he is a nice guy Im betting and you are not totally against the idea of dating him as well.
All these considered, is there any reason not to date him besides it being your first? There is no reason not to take it slow if you prefer, even explaining to him "Lets be careful and take our time"

You know him, he is nice, and you may like him as well, sounds like the perfect person to start dating, heck, surely dating a random you hardly know would go a lot worse?
>> US No. 12104
File 133755059293.jpg - (30.59KB , 184x184 , 4.jpg )
It's true, there is a little attraction there on my end, but in all honestly, the thought of upgrading the relationship to -RELATIONSHIP- status, scares me. I don't want to have to deal with him constantly trying to call me and hang out with me. I'm a very introverted person, and hanging out with him more than twice a week exhausts me.

The only thing i can say that's negative about him is that he has this issue with being attracted to people with a lot of issues. He likes psychoanalyzing people, and 'fixing' people (whther they want him to or not), which gets on my nerves when he tries to do it to me. He tries to get me to talk about my 'feelings and issues' all the time. He also talks a lot about this and that, while I prefer the quiet and the companionship.

For example, once we went hiking together, for 3 hours. And he talked non-stop. I mean c'mon, dude.
>> US No. 12105
File 133755785013.jpg - (5.12KB , 184x184 , a5fda501548e05888ad03f0748f7c1752ce1c443_full.jpg )
Forgive me, for I think I lost my marbles.
>> CA No. 12106
So last night, bf and I were getting pretty heavy into the flirting, and I'm still rather butterflied about the whole 'OMG I HAVE A BOYFRIEND LOOK WE'RE FLIRTING' aspect, so it shot me into a panic attack. Felt sick all night.

Told him about it today, and without me even having to ask to maybe take it a little slower, he offered to. He's perfectly understanding about the whole thing, and completely supportive.
Best. Boyfriend. Ever.

But dear god I wish my stomach would stop being such a bitch about everything. I love butterflies, but not when they're having an orgy in my intestines.
>> US No. 12107
I'm in art school, and while I'm doing okay with the actual drawing stuff (which is more of what I want to do for a career anyways), I'm not grasping the graphic design classes as much. There's no class on "what is good design", and I was wondering if anyone had a book suggestion or some links to show me.
>> AU No. 12108
I think art is expressing what is inside you whereas design is reflecting what's already out in the world. Usually it's to solve a problem or convey a particular message. My teachers tell me good design is about stripping away all unnecessary elements, whether it be the serifs on your fonts or the flowery background that you're using 'just because'. I guess good design is eliminating the superfluous and leaving behind a clean, clear message.
>> US No. 12110
I was really positive about a lot of people in this community until I actually sat down and read some of the threads around the board. I don't know why it annoys me so much to see people I admire(d) act like insufferable cunts to each other, but when I see how much drama goes on around this site over stupid bullshit it just makes me want to bang my fucking head on a wall. Watch me get banned for saying that. Or maybe for saying this.

That aside, I got a kitten recently. This should bring me a lot of joy, but I realized once I got the kitten home that I'm not ready for a pet. He's frustrating. Too active, too noisy. I alternate between being intensely angry with him and beguiled. I lost my patience with him today and locked him in the cat carrier and left the room for an hour.

That scares me for one reason: he was frightened and struggling to get out. He was hungry and probably thirsty. And I did not fucking care. I left him even though he was howling to get out. My husband wasn't home to let him out. I was completely apathetic about leaving a helpless living creature in a tiny fucking cage for an hour. If I can do that to a living thing that needs my love and care, what else can I do?

The worst part is that I don't even feel that guilty over it. He makes me angry more often than he makes me happy. I don't enjoy having a pet like I thought I would. I don't feel a lick of love for this kitten. I've told my husband that I'm seriously considering taking it back to the pound, but my husband will absolutely not let me. He loves the kitten. I do not. I spend most of the day alone in the house with this animal and I apparently have no pretenses about abusing it. I'm concerned for my state of mind and I'm concerned for the kitten. I don't have very good impulse control.

Maybe I'm overthinking it, but I don't want to be responsible for the death of this poor unfortunate creature should I lose control of my own shitty temper. I hope this post doesn't make anyone want to track my IP and drop my dox to animal services or something.

(I like cats a hell of a lot more than I like you.)
>> US No. 12111
P.S. I probably just invalidated my already mostly useless comment about the community by making everyone think that I'm a brooding, melodramatic animal abuser.
>> GB No. 12114
File 133769704439.jpg - (2.75KB , 126x97 , wiggum024.jpg )
>I hope this post doesn't make anyone want to track my IP and drop my dox to animal services or something.


>> AU No. 12115
File 133769882927.png - (139.80KB , 343x352 , tumblr_l4118oU1qf1qzhu0do1_400.png )
Ya need a shrink mate
>> US No. 12117
File 133770540444.gif - (98.70KB , 99x131 , Heavybrows.gif )
Oh GOD. It's been SO LONG, internet!

Let's never fight again, baby.

>> GB No. 12132
If my brother complains once more about not having a computer mouse, I'm going to throw one of the four I have at his head.

Also my car pretty much blew up. Kind of pissed off about that. Especially 'cause my dad refuses to fix it. Douchenugget.
>> CA No. 12133
Going to a con today! I am super excited because I get to hang out with a lot of my friends and some really cool con buddies! Plus I get to see my boyfriend for the first time since March! If I seem calm, it's only because I cannot put into words how fucking excited I am. I feel like my brain is bouncing around inside my skull and honestly, short of heading off to the con (doesn't start for a few hours) I want nothing more than to dance.
>> CA No. 12135
Found the three most amazing roleplay partners ever.
Hnnng. That feel.

If you read this, I hope ya'll know who you are ♥
>> CA No. 12136
Oh, I do love that feel. Haven't felt it in a while, since I've had the same partners for a few months+ now, but still. It is a nice feel when you like them instantly.
I should get some new partners. I'm down to two and a half, now, because others are I guess busy with work and life and stuff. Pfft. Life.

SO. Feelings.
I work at a coupon clearinghouse, as I may have said before. We all have these little half-cubicle desk things, with a computer, a printer, and our scanners for the coupons.
Now, I'm only a contract worker, so bottom of the totem pole. One of the full-time people gets moved to my desk, and gets my good red scanner, leaving me stuck with a crappy blue one. (The blue ones aren't as sensitive, and almost never scan cardboard, so my hourly rate has dropped like a stone)
Worst part? Full time lady never wanted to move. She was perfectly content where she was. No one has any idea why our manager moved her.
Also, spent half an hour at the end of the day, cleaning my new desk. JESUS CHRIST. I swear, there's enough lint and dust under there to make a very unattractive sweater. YUCK.
So yeah. Feel kinda peeved. Feel kinda grossed out. But on the bright side, I found out that I actually do like carrot cake cupcakes, now, so that's nice.
>> CA No. 12137
File 133800644547.jpg - (88.88KB , 600x544 , 132181938150.jpg )
Lost 60 pounds, feels good man.
>> CA No. 12138
Hey, hey.
I'm not busy with life

>> CA No. 12139
O rly?
>> CA No. 12140
File 13381789917.jpg - (38.54KB , 500x360 , 60f.jpg )

Here, have the most obvious email ever.
>> US No. 12141

WOW! A. Kitten. made. you. angry.

kitten + you = angry

what what what what what what

but seriously, go fall in a hole. Kittens are not that god damn hard to deal with.
>> US No. 12142
File 133821412943.jpg - (22.58KB , 599x300 , 340982-248938_brodyquest3_super_super.jpg )
Feeling pretty good today.

I have made a big step and ascended once again.
>> CA No. 12143
Feel free to add me on steam, too, if you want. Izzy41630.

Okay, WTF scanner.
We have quotas we have to make at my work. Currently, I'm supposed to be scanning 10,400 coupons a day. Now, my strategy, upon getting moved to my new station, is just to let myself suck normally, and let them cringe at the low numbers.
But GODAMNIT I got really good blue mail today, and ended up making 10,300.
Plan fail. Feels bad.
But at the same time happy, because that mail was SO FUCKING GOOD and usually I get crap.
>> US No. 12144
I do not understand why, when I ask someone to tell me more about something they like, like a comic book or a celebrity I am unfamiliar with, I get the response "USE GOOGLE, DUMBASS". I'm standing right in front of you, and you can't recant the plot of a movie you just watched and give me a vague estimation of whether or not I'd enjoy it?
>> US No. 12146
Man, you must be traumatized if you're telling people IRL "google it dumbass".
>> US No. 12147
namefagging, sorry.

Holy fuck I can't sleep lately. My life is just bizarre right now. It's 4:41 in the morning and i'm wide awake. What the fuck body? get tired, I have class today.
>> US No. 12148
One of my in real life friends s following my tumblr (damn you auto correct!) and I really don't want her to. I really, REALLY don't want her to.

Like really really really REALLY REALLY don't want her too.

I just wanted my tumblr to be a place for ME. And not have to worry about the porn I reblog and the stupid fan fiction I write I just wanted privacy. i made my tumblr purposely anonymous too. I just want privacy from her because I feel like she thinks my whole life revolves around her or something. It makes me so god damn mad. Now I have to figure out something cause honestly that stuff was only meant to be shared with my online friends. Something that I didn't want anyone but you guys to see.

I know thats really stupid because it's the internet yaddayaddayadda and whatever but I just feel she looks down on everyone and she's just gonna judge me. It makes me so mad and I know its stupid but part of me just wants her to stop...doing things.


I hate her tumblr (damn you auto correct!) habits so god damn much sometimes. She constantly reblogs her own stuff on facebook and it makes me wanna punch walls. Yes! you drew a picture we get it. keep it off facebook it just makes you look like a douche. I don't care if you're trying to "get yourself out there" do it elsewhere, doing it on facebook just makes you look self centered. Stop reblogging your own stuff! stop posing for your profile picture. It makes you looks self obsessed, no one wants to see you making batty eyes at the camera! stop acting like an asshole when someone offers you a critique! You have no grasp on color theory so when I tell you somethings color makes no sense it makes no sense! fuck you i've been studying color theory for fucking years i know what i'm talking about. I hate how you dumb your art down because you think people are stupid and won't like you art unless you make it as stupid as possible! You have a good grasp on anatomy, quit throwing those skills away and drawing the easiest things possible! Quit talking shit about your followers! Stop pretending to like nerd stuff hardcore when you've only liked it for a week! You used to be so nice! What the fuck happened to you? You used to actually consider me your equal but now it feels like you think everyone is below you! You turned into such a colossal asshole in the past year and it makes me wanna punch babies it's so god damn annoying! drop all this hipster crap and be yourself again!

RANT OVER, I'm sorry tf2chan, I'm so sorry baby I won't hurt you no more. I promise.
>> US No. 12149
File 133833387664.jpg - (5.15KB , 125x155 , monitorthrow.jpg )
My graphics card took a shit. everything artifacted like crazy.even firefox. Luckily, my grandma had given me 50bux for my birthday.
>> CA No. 12150
File 133834733377.jpg - (231.45KB , 768x1024 , Photo0147A.jpg )
Had a great time at my con! Derped around as an Engineer with my sexy Sniper in tow.
My mother saw this picture and said, and I quote; "He looks like a male stripper and you look like a dyke. What business do you have with eachother?"
An amazing weekend was had. Can't wait for the next one!
>> PL No. 12151
1. Checks the state of bank account after buying even more work clothes.
2. Weeps.
3. Sends out job applications.
5. Profit! (hopefully)
>> US No. 12153
So, I discovered that my father, who put on a really impressive, loving front, cares more for his girlfriend of one year than he does for me. I had to defend myself against her daughter's insults, and decided to vent on the phone to my sweetheart. During that vent, I called the kid a fucking brat, because she IS.

Seriously, she's 11 years old and she cussed me out because I wouldn't let her run across 4 lanes of traffic with no streetlight, crosswalk, or stop sign. I was looking out for her fucking SAFETY, for God's sake!

Oh, and THEN she told me that when I left, she was going to keep Snuggletooth, MY turtle. Where was I when this decisions was made? I was cussed out for telling her 'no' to that too, by the way.

So, after her mother eavesdropped on our conversation and heard me call her daughter a brat. Instead of...oh God, I don't know...TELLING me, she ordered my father to stop calling me, stop visiting me, and stop talking to me when he was around.

I had to BEG for someone to tell me what the fuck was going on, and when they did, I wasn't allowed to get a word in edgewise.

Yes, I shouldn't have called her a brat, but when an 11 year old girl calls me a fat bitch because I don't let her charge headlong into a horde of cars moving at 70 miles an hour, I get pissed.

So, I thought "Oh, well, I'm in the wrong, I'll call the mother and apologize." No dice. She wouldn't answer my calls, and all my dad would say is "Well maybe you should just go back to your mother."

Bear in mind, I wasn't staying with Dad and his squeeze. I was staying with Grandma, because the girlfriend didn't want to have a filthy turtle in the house. They told me to get the fuck out while I wasn't even WITH them.

All this, however, doesn't hold a candle to being accused of spying on my dad to get him thrown into jail because he hasn't paid ten years of child support. I went there because I love my dad and wanted to see him, nothing more. That accusation broke my heart, and thanks to the fact that no one trusted me, all my phone calls, I came to found out, were eavesdropped on, hence the angry mother.

So. Back in Hiawassee. Contemplating drinking until my liver explodes and kills me.
>> AU No. 12154
Too much work and no money. Where are the people with too much money and no work, and how do I become one of them?
>> CA No. 12155
My job can go fuck itself.

We have summer hours starting now, which means I have to work extra during the week, and get off Friday afternoons.
Now, I was told, all through my employment here, that these were OPTIONAL. That was fine with me, because I work on my mom's schedule, because I have no car. So what she works, I work.
Now I find out that they've decided to make it MANDATORY. And they tell us this the week before it starts, so I have two days to get an entirely new schedule together, involving dad picking me up some days, mom working extras, and me working like, 12 hours two days of the week.
>> US No. 12156
File 133858187876.png - (169.09KB , 485x339 , nathanvetterleinWAT.png )
>>Me: "I don't know what to do, my parents and siblings keep getting really angry at me for stupid shit and threatening to kill me. I'm starting to get scared."
>>Psychologist/One of my friends: "AWWW THEY REALLY LIKE YOU, they just want to show you they're worried about you, that's all."

>> GB No. 12165
File 133869237053.png - (92.48KB , 532x353 , jesus i hope i didnt leave that oven on or i am so.png )
When I was younger my mom took medication for her bi-polar because she tried to kill me as a baby, but it made her so... not-herself that she gave up the medication years ago. During that period it was tough on her and I (my dad was a working dad, wasn't around enough to have the same problems) because any time I tried to be adolescent and emotional she would get worked up and always overshadow all my feelings with hers... until I learned to just shut up and tuck all my feelings away. Which is how I ended up suffering through all sorts of peer abuse without anyone noticing for two years. And how I was nearly taken advantage of by teen boys and managed to go home and act like nothing happened.

Fast-forward to now when I'm a well-adjusted(?) young women and my little brother is going through his first stages of teenager.
> That feel when he tries to strangle me.
> That feel when he takes a metal baseball bat to a window because I trapped him on the other side of a glass door to get away from him when he's being violent.
> That feel when my mom has been calm for years and my brother manages to get her riled up again yesterday to the point she nearly leaves him where he is and drives home.
(I have quite a few memories of her leaving me on the side of the road.)

My brother is bi-polar, I'm pretty much certain of it. My grandpa had it too.

>complicated feels
>jimmies rustled
>completely powerless in situation
>Worst of all I just kinda feel relieved deep down that it won't be my problem much longer.

This wouldn't be so heavy on my mind but the other day my mom had a small debate over a distant issue (circumcision, not relevant) and later she said, "You know, if it were a few years ago and you had disagreed with me like that I would have flown into a rage"... which struck a chord with me because the entire debate we had I was stepping around her like I always have. I didn't push my view too hard, I was always ready to back out and admit a meaningless defeat... basically, I don't know if she didn't get mad because of me or because of her. She gets frustrated with my bro a lot more than me. (Makes sense though, I'm not a teenager anymore.)

TL;DR there are two bi-polar people with a history of violence in my house and soon I'm not going to be there to be the serene, robotic medium.

In other news... the summer break has arrived! Woo! The heatwave around here has stopped and made way for the rain once again, thank god. I was dying. There goes England's yearly sole week of sun.
>> US No. 12166


I suggest you find a new one.
What sort of psychologist answers with that? I'm still in school and I know that is NOT how you tackle that kind of statement or situation by a long shot.
>> CA No. 12167
I confided in my mom that I'd been thinking about cutting and that part of me doesn't understand why that is necessarily bad when everyone abuses themselves in some way. She claims she doesn't (Bull shit) and then says she has to "detach with love" cause I'm even thinking about this. So yeah thanks mom, glad I confided in you instead of bottling it up like I used to, that really made it better, being pushed away.

Fuck I can't even do what makes it better, talking about it, withought beeing treated like a fuck up. Yeah "detatch with love" you used that when you dumped me at the mental hospital mom.

I try to open up at the time of year I always do the worst mentally and get shut down cause of my "stinkin' thinkin'" I'm sorry we can't all just run away from out emotions mom and put on a happy face and be diseptive fucks like you who pretend that they aren't massive hypocrites.

Glad I fucking have an understanding mom.
>> AU No. 12168
File 133877441734.jpg - (31.93KB , 397x412 , wisdom-teeth-impacted.jpg )
So, I think I've got one or more impacted wisdom teeth. The whole left side of my jaw hurts unless I take paracetamol every 4 hours or so. And my medicare card doesn't cover dental care... here's hoping I can find an emergency dentist or dental school that'll do an operation (or just and x-ray) for free.
Ohhh wellll. Helped Ryojin and his brother move house over the weekend. That made me feel useful, at least. And the appointments with the psychologist are still going on. I don't feel as if I'm slipping into impending doom quite as much as I used to, even if I may well be worse off than I used to be.
>> US No. 12173
Finding out tomorrow whether or not we got the apartment we want.

I am so nervous. Wish us luck, guys.
>> US No. 12175
I don't even know.

My parents will act nice and polite one minute (especially around people who aren't family) and jump down my throat about everything the next. So when I try to confide in people about how they don't allow me to have any freedom or have a job, or how they try to convince me every person I date/try to become friends with just wants me for my body or to steal money from me, people usually tell me "they're so nice, you're clearly lying, they really do love you".

People who love me wouldn't treat their kids this way, at least not when they're legally an adult. I feel trapped.
>> US No. 12179
I miss this place... Wish I ever had enough time to make proper visites like I used to.
>> US No. 12181
File 133901022646.jpg - (53.34KB , 256x256 , Sovereign_Codex_Image.jpg )
Nazara has arrived. Time to set her up and-
/Nazara has DMI,HDMI,and DP vidya ports
uggh. I need a converter to convert the 2'nd monitor into it.
but otherwise,she is a sexy beast. Nazara(Named after the name the geth called Sovereign) will be taking over The Judge's Position. Lots of transferring and installing to do!
>> US No. 12183
ACCEPTED. I move out in twelve days! So stoked.

Gotta set up the utilities tomorrow and I frankly have no clue what I'm doing. Fun shit!
>> CA No. 12186
My grandmother passed away, and I sobbed my brains out last night, because she's been in the hospital for a bit, and I haven't gone to see her, because I've been so wiped from work, and they told me she was doing fine anyway. She got a blood clot in her leg, and they removed it, but it just went downhill, and last night she slipped away.
Now, I'm not religious, but the fact that a rainbow appeared right after she passed seems just so eerie that it has to be a sign.
>> CA No. 12187
I forgot to share this when it happened, but pictures keep popping up on blogs and things and everytime I see one I'm filled with joy and pride and affection.
A couple weeks ago, Anime North, a huge fan-run convention took place in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. I went dressed as a BLU Femgineer with a home made Gunslinger and my boyfriend went as a BLU Sniper. The first day of the con he missed the Valve shoot and he was very disappointed about it since he had a 'special surprise' variation on his costume that he wanted to show off.
So the second day of the con we went to the Valve shoot together and the shoot was so much fun, a couple channers that I know were there, we took some great pictures and had some hilarious moments. As soon as the Engie shoot was done and the Sniper shoot had just finished up, my boyfriend and I snuck off to the parking lot and he changed into his second costume. He then ran back to the shoot and bombed at least a half a dozen Spies as they did their shoot. He was dressed in nothing but an Australian speedo, socks, shoes, hat, and glasses. Pic is further up the thread.
I can't even begin to descirbe how happy I was to stand with the other cosplayers as everyone took pictures of him, everyone watching him humping unsuspecting spies, while I held the rest of his clothes and said 'yeah, that's my boyfriend.'
Maybe because my ex was so... opposite of him? I can recall my ex, on more than one occasion, pretending he didn't know me in public because he didn't want anyone to think he was affiliated with me. It was the same at cons, he avoided me because I was lame and cosplaying and acting like a fool. It makes me so happy that my current boyfriend and I can be ridiculous together, that he loves me for being the outlandish character that I am and he joins me in the type of shenanigans that are the main reason I go to cons.
tl;dr: don't listen to me, i'm deliriously in love <3
>> US No. 12190
My friends keep saying that if this other friend and I are having a "secret relationship", we are doing a terrible job of keeping it secret. We are not together.
>> US No. 12191
I am simultaneously sick of my boyfriend's ex to the point of genuinely wishing him dead, and laughing hysterically at his pathetic existence. He left his DS at my boyfriend's house MONTHS ago and demands that we ship it to him, which we're refusing because it's expensive. We've given him every opportunity to come here and get it, but he doesn't want to get up off his lazy ass and come get it, so he threatened to call the cops because "it's theft." Then when we blew him off, he threatened to take us to court. Over a DS Lite. Even if he had a case, which he doesn't - OVER A DS LITE.

On the bright side, we got a kitten! Another birthday present for the boy, but it's not like I needed any persuasion. Still hoping to find our missing cat too, of course.

Moving out on the 20th. We've got a lot to do, but I am insanely excited.
>> US No. 12193
I sort of feel like a friend of mine is invading my life. I enjoy their company, I really do, but it's getting to the point where I'm spending most of my time not working with them, now they've taken to spending a lot of time at my house because someone else is inviting them over. It's getting to the point where, if I run out of ways to entertain them/the original host leaves, they'll watch what I'm doing on my laptop. That's especially frustrating because, sure, I'm doing nothing wrong, but having someone watch you 24/7 is very, very vexxing and makes me too stressed out to do anything but fix up minor details in lineart or something. It doesn't help thaat I feel like a bad friend because I don't always have something to talk to them about or something for us to do together when I'm hanging out with them.
I just sort of want to be alone for a while. I have enough little things stressing me out. One of my good friends shouldn't be a stressor, and I feel bad for considering them one to the degree that I don't want to makle plans with anyone, period.
>> US No. 12195
I feel like if you go online you're supposed to be cool with absolutely every joke the internet makes, nothing is serious business, and you're not supposed anything goes too far or isn't cool.

And I can't really stomach that belief or understand why it exists, only that I'm wrong for thinking it, apparently.
>> US No. 12196

Unless you go to Tumblr, where every joke is offensive.

I move out in ten days holy shit. My parents decided to get us a fridge for our housewarming gift, which takes a HUGE load off of me. Got the internet set up, got EVERYTHING I need for the kitchen for $200 (god bless grocery outlet), and everything is almost packed. All I have to do now is set up the utilities and get a phone plan.
>> US No. 12197
I always felt the exact opposite. Tumblr (and a few other sites, Steam Workshop being one) screamed at me when I expressed my distaste for Holocaust (especially regarding Medic, and especially when I point out he's canonically NOT a Nazi, which people have flat-out refused to believe) and 9/11 jokes. That people who get offended at anything are assholes who are trying to ruin other people's fun.

I don't consider myself a tightass or a media watchdog or anything, but I have lines I refuse to cross.
>> US No. 12199

Yeah, I have seen that as well, and I agree with you. I have no idea when 9/11 and Holocaust jokes became funny or okay, but I don't dig it. I admit to occasionally laughing at some in that "shock humor" kind of "oh my god what the fuck that's so horrible why am I laughing" kind of way, but I especially don't take kind to it with Medic. It feels like people are making him a Nazi simply because he's German, which is pretty fucked up. I feel that way about Nazi Eridan too, since there's a lot of headcanon about him having a German-ish accent.
>> US No. 12200
The argument I had heard was "it's the internet, nothing should be taken seriously". I treat the internet the same way I treat offline life- only say what you mean, don't be douchey, treat all people like real people.

People need to do their research more when it comes to WWII and I feel the same way about Eridan as you do. Like Dr. Erskine said in Captain America: The First Avenger: "People often forget Germany was the first country they invaded."
>> US No. 12202
I have Bronchitis. Again. This is the THIRD time in four months. Should I be concerned?

Also I'm shitting blood again like whoa.
>> US No. 12205
Mixed feels. Got a new turtle, and he's the most chill motherfucker I've ever seen. Likes having his chin scratched and everything. I found him in the middle of the road, scrambling in a circle.

And then, once I got him situated, my cat ripped a baby rabbit's jugular out and deposited its struggling body onto my feet when I came outside to investigate the squealing.

Nature sucks, man.
>> US No. 12206
Does not sound good. At least a basic check-up is reccommended.
>> CA No. 12207
Could be a sign of a compromised immune system due to infection of some kind. I had the same about 3 months only to find out my system was compromised cause my body was using up my white cells trying to fight strep throat.
>> US No. 12212
Audio Magia_[German_Cover].mp3 - (658.07KB - 59 kbps - 22.05 kHz , Magia [German Cover].mp3 ) Length: 1:31
so apparently you can upload mp3's up to 1000kb. I did not know this. trying it now.
>> CA No. 12217
Obligatory post about being pissed off at my parents.
>> BR No. 12218

Dear, try take a look at it. Go make a check-up...

Is your Bronchitis chronic or something? Watch out for your immunological system.
>> AU No. 12223
File 133983845272.jpg - (39.44KB , 400x428 , 35d08w.jpg )
well tonight was certainly interesting
>> US No. 12227
Went to AM^2 over the weekend which was awesome. It was small and not much to do, but it was a really chill con with a lot of cool people.

Signed our lease yesterday! Moving out Wednesday. My entire room is boxes.
>> CA No. 12231
File 134007313310.jpg - (619.01KB , 384x2587 , rage.jpg )
My sister came over for father’s day, she brought her boyfriend and their new dog. I went up to spend some family time with them and after I’d sat down she reached over and pulled my tank top up higher and told me it was obscene. My bra was not showing and to be frank my chest is a 48k cup, it is going to look big in anything I wear, but as it’s summer and I can’t afford new clothes as I’m losing weight I have old tank tops, that actually fir better now than they did 60 pounds ago. I texted her after to tell her that I felt what she’d done was inappropriate and this is what I got. She fails to realize that even taking me aside to do this shit is disrespectful as fuck. I don’t tell her what to wear cause it’s not my business and I don’t think it’s unreasonable to want the same.
>> US No. 12232
I met someone amazing through this forum. Wow, I didn't think it was possible to like/love anyone as much as this, but it's been done.

TF2 is fucking awesome. I couldn't imagine being without Spy, it's like a dream ♥
>> US No. 12233

Wow, I am so sorry about that. I'd say more regarding your sister, but considering she IS still your sister, I just... Won't.

But I will tell you that you're fine the way you are, and I am hugely impressed with the amount of weight you've lost in such a short amount of time. Not to look "good", but to get healthier. Period.

I'm sorry that your sister does not understand, but trust me when I say I feel your pain when it comes to trying to open up family members' eyes to statements that can (and have) hurt others in the past. Truth is, they're behind the times, just like people who refused to see Jim Crow Laws as bad, or people who thought gays should be exiled (or worse).

Hopefully they'll catch up, but learning new ways of thinking is hard for people who have been spoon-fed knowledge all their lives and don't know what it's like being on the receiving end of all of that discrimination. I hesitate to call you lucky because your weight seems to be the only problem While getting shot in the head is worse than getting shot in the arm, it still sucks to get shot in the arm, I can assure you that, even though your family may not understand, they will still love you no matter what.

I think you should stand for what you believe in, but your sister is still proud to be your kin. I know I'd be.
>> CA No. 12234
She fails to understand that part of gaining weight to begin with was a reaction to assaults/rapes from 3 separate men. Yes I'm fucking sensitive of it, because it isn't only is weight to me I'm dealing with. It's a past of assault and of assault again that police told me "I wanted" when I went looking for help.

And that might not have been an issue if this weren't the time of year I was molested at 5. I just am a mess and the fact that someone in my family would shame me like that at a time of year that leaves me an emotional wreck to begin with just brings it all back.
>> US No. 12235
Oh... well... I certainly didn't know that...

Well... Maybe I should just shut my mouth right now, but at the risk of further putting my foot in my mouth, I'd advise you to tell her everything you just told us. She'll never truly understand if you don't lay it out for her like that.

I'm sorry if I made things worse, though, I was only trying to help.
>> PL No. 12236
My last grandparent died today, and no one was near him because they worked shitty jobs to make a living. Save for the nurses, and the fact that my mum visited him again yesterday, like always.
I can't really write anything more, I still hate a lot of things about our current situation, and that was another one. We had one really good year, maybe 1 1/2, but that's it. Whoopee.
>> CA No. 12237
No you didn't I'm just frustrated and I this year I'd rather talk about it for once instead of bottling it all up. I'm just angry at her cause she should know better on more than one level why doing that is hurtful to me.
>> US No. 12239
>assault again that police told me "I wanted" when I went looking for help.

What? What kind of police officer would say something like that?
>> CA No. 12240
Okay. Laughed today.

So my city has a ridiculous amount of one-way streets uptown. Literally over 50% of them are one-way.
Now, we drove down one street, to go and see the cruise ship. Two lanes, one lane going right, another going left.
Some asshole tries to turn up the one-way street, and got pissed at us when he couldn't.
So we drive on, and eventually have to come back down this street.

....turns out it wasn't a one-way street. Oopsies.

Oh well. No one died. That's what matters.
>> US No. 12241
a huge number of them
"she was asking for it"
"dressing provocatively"
"if you wear a short skirt in the bad part of town then you bear some responsibility for it yourself! it's like flashing cash in the poor district and then being surprised when you're mugged!"
"well she chose to go on a date with him soooooo she's partially responsible for this"
discouraging people from even attempting to report things either actively by saying that he probably won't get arrested so it's not worth the cop's time or less directly by saying shit like the above and otherwise victim-blaming
it's not just cops it's our society
this is what rape culture means
>> DK No. 12243
About two weeks ago, I had a fight with my sister.
She threatened my life, screamed at me and tried to claw at my eyes and strangle me.
I slapped her. Once.

She's angry at me, because I have chosen to not see my father any more, but that's the first time she have attacked me like that.

I should probably mention, that my father abused me as a child, also he is a certified paedophile and have more than once hurt a child (besides me).

Fast forward to today, where my mother tells me she wants me to apology to my sister for hitting her.
As it turns out, my sister have told my mother that all she did was yell at me, and I hit her.

And the fact that I've slapped my sister, is all my mother is concerned about.
Not the fact that my sister started it, or the fact that she tried to strangle me.
Not the fact that my sister tells me that I have ruined hers and my fathers lives, after they have both ruined mine.
Not that I'm right now suffering mentally, because of the scars in my soul that have been ripped opened once more, or that I have to go to the mentalist again.

Just the fact, that I slapped my sister.
>> CA No. 12244
I think it's time you consider cutting your sister too in all honesty. She seems extremely toxic to you and to buried in what is probably denile to see what you are going through.

I'm really sorry your mom didn't side with you after you told her what happened from your vantage. I'm on your side all the way.
>> US No. 12249
I don't get along with my family much, and they have a habit of yelling at me, guilt-tripping me, blaming me for things that I wasn't involved in, won't let me leave the house much, constantly try to convince me I have no redeemable traits/will never be able to learn to drive or have a job, and constantly invade my personal space.

Some of my friends tell me to shut up and stop whining, because this is completely normal and other people have to deal with way worse.

My girlfriend and some of my other friends think this is completely wrong and something I should stand up to them about, try to move out, etc. I'm honestly not sure.
>> US No. 12250
I read a great quote recently: "Telling someone not to complain because others have it worse is like telling someone not to be happy because others have it better." I really do think that applies here. One's experiences can damage them more than they realize, regardless of the fact that 'everyone deals with it'. I can tell you from my own experience that, sometimes, the best thing to do is get out and get out before things get worse. I regret not leaving my family sooner, and they still try to get into contact with me years after the fact I told them I was through with their games. Talking it out didn't work; I was shouted at and insulted to tears for being selfish, etc. I am far happier than I realized I could be since leaving them. I give this same advice to people I know in real life and I don't care that it sounds harsh. Sometimes it's for the best.
>> US No. 12251
Dear Listener

I want to kill myself and I don't know how to deal with my issues. I don't know how to cope with what I'm going through right now.

Please, help me.
>> CA No. 12252
Killing yourself is never the answer. Not ever. I implore you, please don't do that. The mere fact that you've reached out says that there's at least some part of you that doesn't want to. LISTEN TO THAT PART.

Now, please. Tell us what's wrong. I'm sure someone here can give you advice, no matter what the problems are. But we can't help if you just say 'I have problems', but don't elaborate. We can't know how to help, then, except to say that we're there for you. And we are.
If you scroll up a ways, there are several posts with people's emails, and they've expressed a desire to help people with their problems, if you'd prefer to contact them privately, rather than post all your problems on a public forum.
>> GB No. 12253
Iz is right on many fronts, especially the part where there people willing to talk and listen. If you would rather talk to someone in private with the knowledge that they won't share any details of who you are, you can contact me on steam at the id Donstheman
>> DK No. 12254

Think about it friend, do you really know what will happen if you kill yourself? Will you find peace?

For all you know, something worse might be waiting for you on the other side. No one really knows what happens when you die, no one.

But we do know what happens while you live. We know you can get ice cream or pet a puppy, all those small things that makes life so great.

I know that right now life probably seems though for you, but do you really want to end your life, and never do all the things that makes you happy again?

Sometimes life is though, but for all we know, death might be even worse, so instead of killing yourself, you should fight to get a better life, then you can keep enjoying all the things you like...
>> DK No. 12256
And so it happened, I lost my mother.

We had an argument again, because she still wants me to apology to my sister.

Let's recap - I was abused as a child, My sister tells me it's all my fault, that I'm a horrible person, and tries to choke me and scratch out my eyes.
My mother says I'm a bad person for defending myself.

I told my mom that I didn't care, I would never want ANYONE to apology for putting their foot down in a situation like that, and that I can't believe that she can act like it's okay for my sister to acct the way she did.

My mother essentially told to move out.

Thank you mom, thank you for being the only person I cared for ad trusted, and then tell me "fuck you" and toss me away like a broken toy.
>> US No. 12258
I think it's for the best that you get away from that environment, I'm just sorry to see that it had to come about this way. I wish I could be of more help, but know that there are people here - many people - who are happy to listen.
>> US No. 12264
This is the anon that said they wanted to kill themselves.

Out of all the places I've went to, you guys answered me and thank you so much. I'm super embarrassed to add people and personally talk to them, but I would rather do that then post them publicly. So thanks so much for responding. I really want to reach out.

I don't want to kill myself, but I feel so hurt and heartbroken over everything and I don't know how to cope. I guess I need to find a way to cope and move on from things.

Thanks so much, again. Thank you.
>> US No. 12268
I have been dealing with depression since middle school. I still find it hard to take compliments, love myself, not be overly critical, or not take things too hard.

I don't want to let my friends go through the same thing, and two of them are actively refusing to let me help them. They shut down every compliment I give them, tell me they refuse to allow themselves to be happy, tell me I don't care when I'm doing my damnedest to try to help. I have no idea what to do, I'm scared here.
>> US No. 12269
It's so hard to get through to people like that. Not only do they suffer from depression but they convince themselves they're right in being that way, that they should be.
I knew somebody like that. While he did get better, unfortunately I had nothing to do with it
>> US No. 12271
I know the feeling. But I also know that the people who stay around, the people who truely care about you and stick through everything, don't hate you. And those are the people whose opinions you should value over others. It took me years to realize that, but I'm happier now that I do.

I'm a very meek person, and as much as I love my friends, some of them are very hard-headed and stubborn, and I don't know if what I do is going to be enough to get them to listen.

The story about your friend makes me feel a lot better, though. Knowing that someday they might be able to get help in some other day. Thank you.
>> US No. 12273
So as of right now, I'm listening to my mother scream at my brother and my brother destroy things that I worked to buy.

Yay, family. It's okay, I don't mind spending what little money I make at my job to fix my things. I don't mind staying in my room because I'm too afraid to leave. It's all good, bro.
>> CA No. 12277
That feeling when you switch toothpastes, and the new one tastes like shit for a week.

Ugh. Brushed with Crest for ten years. Switched to Sensodyne for like six months, and now my mouth acts like Crest is this malevolent invader.
>> US No. 12278
So, my sweethearts abusive ex wants to be friends now.


What kills me the most is that he wants 'the past to be in the past' and to 'get to know me.'

He screamed at, berated, and threatened a sweet, charming, wonderful woman over a fucking video game. I can't count the number of times he's put her down to the point that I have to reassure her that she isn't a terrible, worthless sack of shit. That's how he treats her, and then turns around and wants to call her 'the love of his life.'

Can you fucking believe this?

And now he wants to be friends. No thanks, you handicapped cunt scab, I see how you treat your 'friends.'

But hey, at least it's a step away from having my shit broken. I'd prefer not to repeat yesterdays panic attack episode.
>> CA No. 12281
Get ready, America.

I'm coming for you.
>> US No. 12284
Reading this, I heard 'I'm Coming Out' by Diana Ross playing in my head. Hope you enjoy your trip!
>> US No. 12286
File 134129771569.gif - (265.36KB , 400x400 , dancinmedic2.gif )
So I'm started to get back in TF2 after a long, unintentional hiatus. I thought I'd pop back into the Chan to see how everyone's doing.

I missed you guys.
>> AU No. 12288
File 134136462151.jpg - (46.21KB , 400x300 , STEREO GET OUT.jpg )
>> CA No. 12289
Anyone know how to file a noise complaint? Jesus Christ. 2AM on a Tuesday. Who the fuck does this?!
>> US No. 12291
Whenever we've had a noise complaint, we've contacted the local police station rather than call 911. Sadly, it often turned out the people had a permit. As for 'who does this' - selfish, inconsiderate douchenozzles.
>> CA No. 12294
They also have a campfire in their yard, and it's illegal here, to have an open fire within city limits.

And it turned into four in the morning. They're blasting it again, now, at 10:30. Do they not realize this is a residential neighbourhood, with small children, and people who work on a weekday?

If it goes on again tonight, I'm calling the cops. I need my sleep.
>> US No. 12297
I support you 100%. It's common courtesy and I can't imagine it's legal, by any stretch of the imagination.
>> CA No. 12299
I checked out sound by-laws on the community website. Apparently loud music is not permitted EVER, and any sort of loud noises (power tools, revving engines, etc.) are prohibited between the hours of 9 PM and 7 AM.

So yeah. If they do it again, I'm calling the cops on their asses. That $50-$200 fine will teach them to be better neighbours.

ALSO. Our streetlight has been out for literally two months. Called city hydro about it, and they said they had a work order. Well, I guess the workers were down the street today, and my dad stopped to talk to them. Apparently they had no idea. But they said they'll come and fix the light within a few days.
Is it really so hard for a receptionist to take down a proper message? Two months our street has been black as pitch. Jeez.
>> US No. 12300
Ahhh yeeeeah.
>> US No. 12302
File 134145297776.png - (38.17KB , 450x450 , NO.png )
>> US No. 12303
Someone was going on and on last night about how everyone's privileged, selfish, racist, and does everything for themselves, and (despite the fact that I generally avoid this topic and politics in general like the plague) I just snapped and responded, as politely as I could, that not everyone's bad, that people stand up for the equal rights of others, that maybe some people are, in fact, good and have good intentions.

Immediately people jumped down my throat and called me a liar and a fool, and I'm just sitting here shaking and feeling awful.

I just...I was raised thinking I was a bitch for disagreeing with people, even if I said "[x] isn't a thing I'm interested in, nothing personal". People, especially my parents, jump down my throat every time I speak up on anything. But it makes me uneasy to think that some people are so mistrusting and cynical of the entire world. How can you have friends and relationships and a job if you think everyone's so shit?
>> US No. 12307
File 134157491197.gif - (27.10KB , 285x170 , BananaTwins.gif )
>Go to Wal-mart at 5:25 in the morning to beat the record high temps,find Little Debbie guy restocking and ask why Wal-mart doesn't carry Banana Twins.
Turns out it's because they carry the "Banana Pudding" Snack cake instead of it, which basically looks like a Banana Snack cake Swiss Roll. BUT
He's gonna put in a special request order for me and put them behind this one product on a black Shelf unit were he's allowed to put anything. HNNNG. Normally my mom has to go to a store somewhat out of the way for her and buy them for me, since only some stores carry them.
Banana Twins are my childhood,I am so excite.
My mom used to buy them for herself at first because she couldn't have chocolate at the time,but I ended up liking them more then the chocolate snack cakes.
>> CA No. 12311
Middle-aged men who bitch about their life on facebook like teenage girls really bug me.

'Wahh, we've had two days of rain this month, therefore it's terrible.'
'Wahh, my daughter wants an expensive toy. Kids these days!'

He actually referred to his daughter as 'Aspergers girl'. Not 'my daughter with Aspergers'. Aspergers girl. I don't even have it, and I still think it's offensive.
>> US No. 12312
I'm 19 years old and I just graduated highschool. In my freshman year, my mom and dad went through a long, nasty and unnessisary divorce. My mom took me to live with her and I'm ready to go home. (She took us out of state away from Dad) I have no money and no idea how to be a grown up, and my mom doesnt either. She lives off her parents and its just not good. I'm not happy where mom took me to live. And I want to live with my dad until I can get my own flat/apartment/place.

I just need advice on how to tell my mom I'm done living with her and her abusive mother. Can you guys help me? I have a horrible way with words and I would appreciate it so much.
>> US No. 12313

Maybe have your dad back you up. Legally, you can move out whenever you want at your age. You just have to be very firm about it and not give in.
>> US No. 12314
As a kid who grew up through two divorces, let me suggest that you NOT involve your Dad. A lot of the time, that is the WORST thing you can do and stirs up a whole mess of bad feelings, and if he doesn't come through, you're up shit creek without a paddle. I don't have a solution for you, but unless you're INCREDIBLY sure your dad can help, do something different than this.
>> US No. 12315
The thing is I'm with my dad now, and my mom's pretty messed up.My aunt also supports me, and she'd take me in any day. I just need a way to tell my mom before the 18th. How should I word it? Should I say "I want to live in Texas. I'll be back for my stuff soon." Or what?
>> US No. 12316

When your explaining it to your mom, try to make it seem like you just really like texas. Try to make it not seem about her.
>> US No. 12317
I'll do that. I'll just say I'm very unhappy where she lives.
>> US No. 12323
Middle-aged and older guys are bitchy as hell. It's like a valve opens up. I look forward to being that age. :p

Internet's got some mindblowingly antisocial people on it. Kind of obvious, the internet's the only place that really has anything for people like that.
They also use their perception of other people to justify the fact that they're complete pissfucks themselves.
>> US No. 12328
File 134196371750.jpg - (48.84KB , 500x271 , wideawakemedic.jpg )
I stopped talking to someone almost a year ago because she was lying to me (and then getting furious when I called her out on it), guilt-tripping me over things I didn't do, and openly admitted to hating me just because she wanted to be better friends with someone than I was. I apologized profusely and left her alone, knowing the apology wouldn't help.

Nice to know she still has a public hissyfit when my name comes up on reblogs or art requests for artists we mutually like on Tumblr. She's what, 17? 18?

I've never actually attempted suicide, but this is bringing me back to the low point I was years ago where I wanted so badly to die. I can't stand people getting furious at me over anything, I feel massively guilty over it, especially since I remember how nice she initially was when we met.
>> CA No. 12335
I went to my university for my new student orientation today. I'd never been there before except for a weekend visiting my ex boyfriend, during which I didn't get to see the school, only his dorm.
I have to say, even without knowing much about the school besides that they have the program I want, I chose the right school. I registered for my courses, registered for Frosh Week, and now I'm just waiting for these next couple months to pass. Fuck yeah, university instincts. Y'done good.
I know there's likely no fellow Nipissing U students on here, but if there are I'll toss my email up here since I'd love to get into contact with like-minded people before I move in.
>> US No. 12341
I might have a job sculpting teeth. I have no clue how to feel about that.
>> US No. 12347
Definitely unique,though.
>> US No. 12348
My sweetheart saw me nude for the first time today. She laughed. And kept laughing.

I give up.
>> AU No. 12350
i can think of worse reactions
>> US No. 12351

Well, yeah, but jeeze...

Although, I've learned I can't be pretty. At least I can be a punchline, amIrite?
>> CA No. 12352
I've got a serious preoccupation with death now, and I'm not entirely sure why. I'm almost constantly worrying 'What if I died right now?' and the impact it would have on my family, and friends. A lot of the time I worry about how all my online friends would even find out, since most of them don't even know my real name. It's upsetting. I know I shouldn't worry about that kind of stuff, since I'm only 23, and with no major medical concerns of any kind, but I mean, murderers, and wayward buses, you know? Anyone can die at any time, and leave their families behind.

And then I wonder what death is really like. Do we even know we're dead? Or do we just go on with our lives, thinking we're still living them? Do we get reincarnated? Do we go to heaven? I'm sorry, but being forced to be in a place where my friends and families aren't isn't heaven to me.

I just... what's wrong with me? Am I crazy for worrying about death like this?
>> US No. 12353
There's nothing wrong with that. It's a major part of life with no definite answers, so it's normal to spend a lot of time wondering about it.
Now for my feelings:
I had a dream that included someone I once loved, and thought I had gotten over. I told my friend (who is also friends with said someone) about the dream, and he decided he would make it his mission to get us back on speaking terms. He said that that it was not that she did not like me at all, but that she was afraid of me. I have never had anyone fear me before. I know I was an idiot, but I never intended to frighten anyone, and I would never intentionally harm anyone I care about. I guess I just did not know much about what other people might find frightening. Suddenly, I have been feeling much regret over what has happened.
>> CA No. 12354
But is it normal for it to literally be every day, several times a day, and be nearly sent into a panic attack over it? Several times I've had to lie at work and say my eyes are watery because of allergies- THAT'S how upset I end up getting.
>> CA No. 12355
File 134237170229.jpg - (60.42KB , 595x448 , homer4.jpg )

I get paranoid, almost ridiculous notions that I'm going to die. I get them at night, right as I sleep. I spend the night watching the TV trying to calm myself because I think I'm going to die in my sleep. I wish I can call it normal, but it's not. I don't know if you suffer what I have. But if it's disrupting your life, (like you said you get these thoughts at work) you should consider talking to someone. Friend, family, counselor, loved one. These thoughts are not normal, not when they scare you into panic.
>> CA No. 12356
I get them as I go to bed, too, more often than anything. And I've been to counselors before for other issues (poor self image, anger issues when I was younger), and they've never helped before. Plus there's waiting lists, and I don't have insurance.

Honestly just talking about it here helps. To know I'm not completely alone in this, you know?
>> CA No. 12357

You too huh? I went to a counselor once. I didn't find her helpful. I find that distractions help a bit, like craft projects. I'm making a braided carpet. Even thinking about something you're looking forward to, like a trip or outing or event or something. Or watching a funny movie or show. I can't tell you how many times watching MST3k has helped quell the shakes and null the senses. I still feel like crap mind you, from lack of sleep. Just remember to be rational about these thoughts. Like mine for example, are usually delusional. "I swallowed a cherry pit! My insides will melt! No, it takes about a couple of hundred to do that, relax. It was just one" something like that. If you're a healthy whatever old, your chances of dying are very slim. It's good to be concerned about your body and health, but don't constantly worry about it. Go for normal checkups to the medic and you'll be alright. 8)
>> US No. 12358
Idea: Starting a Livestream service.

Whenever a TF2Channer is feeling nervous or insecure, we can make sure someone's streaming something, either art or MST3k or something like that so they can join in.
>> US No. 12359
I'm in favor of this idea. I, myself, am currently in a depression rut. Mostly because I still find myself in the situation of trying to find friends outside the internet that shame similar interests as me, and the only ones I've found live out of state and only means of seeing them is online or when I go to the only local convention I attend once a year. Livestreaming is great in that I can interact with people beyond instant text messages on a IM or e-mail, etc. They're also great 'cheer-me-ups'.

So yeah, I'm totally for a livestream service to help out this awesome community! People may say bad things about this place, but I still find it a safe haven to bring me better spirits with fanart and fanfiction.
>> AU No. 12360
The life expectancy for Canadians is 80.4 years, so at least there's some small comfort in statistics.
>> US No. 12361
If a couple other people join in, I'd love to help start it up, Nothing gets me out of a depressive rut better than planning things.

I know in terms of show streams, several shows stick out in my mind as being popular. Namely The Venture Bros, Transformers: Prime, My Little Pony, and MST3k.

A bunch of people Livestream art, and we could also iScribble.

We can also get people to stream games and movies- my girlfriend's been streaming Bastion, Terraria, and Bioshock for me, for example, and that's been fun. She could also LS us playing Minecraft and TF2...
>> US No. 12362
Happy Birthday to me,
Happy birthday to me,
I'm puking from the flu,
Happy birthday to me.
>> US No. 12363
I have been considering online dating lately, as my odds of meeting anyone offline low, not zero, but since I rarely go anywhere alone, it is unlikely. But I am paranoid and therefore distrustful of anyone that I must go somewhere specifically to meet them for the first time. And I still can not get it out of my head that online dating is for old losers who have given up all hope. I am a young loser that has only given up some hope.
>> CA No. 12364
I've been dieting for the past two weeks and I've lost five pounds, yay. But it kinda can kiss my ass. I had a dream about food last night. It was a giant hamburger from 5 guys. It was pure happiness in a bun but then I finished it. I saw the calorie count and it looked like I had gained ten pounds.

Fuck me.
>> US No. 12365
Wow! Congrats on the weight loss. Sorry to hear about the dream though.
>> US No. 12368
I get paranoia fits like that periodically; during my high school years, I had a series of huge panic attacks during that made my parents decide that maybe I should take a little break. I've had them since, but never to that degree. Of course, it leaves me fatigued, which in turn makes me more paranoid that death's going to get me. It's a vicious cycle like that, at least for me it is. I have to agree that Watson has the right idea, though. I just wish I had some advice to make up for lost sleep.

What a cool idea!
>> PL No. 12382
I've been thinking about it a lot for the past month for obvious reasons, but in my case it's mostly about how a human body looks after dying. Maybe that's why I'm also more fascinated about robotics (and the ability to block some thought processes/delete selected memories). I'd gladly change most of my body into mechanics if not all if it was possible on a satisfying level (or just stick to burning it to ashes, this one is certain).
>> CA No. 12387
That feeling when you've got a major writing boner, and no one to share it with.

HURG someone discuss character development in my new piece with me! UNF.

Also, McDonalds needs to tell their employees to stop forcibly giving me yogurt. Don't tell me you can't substitute it with apples. I see them right there on the goddamn sign. I'm lactose-intolerant, bitch. I tolerate no lactose, and I will tolerate no bullshit.

Sorry. Felt like being hardcore for a second there, before I go off to play with my Happy Meal toy.
>> US No. 12395
I'm gonna try for calarts for next year

please use your collective minds to give me hooooooope
>> AU No. 12396
Oh man, I always dreamed of going there. Alas, I live in Australia and have to go to some cheap imitation college.

Best of luck though! I'm sure it will work out.
>> CA No. 12397
Why does it seem like at least one of my online friends, at any given time, wants to kill themselves?

What do.
>> CA No. 12398
Shitty as it sounds, I'm actually in the same boat a lot of the time!
You're not alone, dear Izzy.
>> US No. 12399
Someone who had the gutz to tell me I was important to them is replacing me with someone else because I'm not good enough. I hate people so much right now.
>> CA No. 12400
Hurray! We all have depressed friends!

We should RP sometime. I miss you.
>> No. 12401
We totally should
I just feel like sometimes I'm invading on peoples' REAL LIFE STUFF when I bother them for rp
>> No. 12402
We totally should
I just feel like sometimes i'm intruding on peoples' REAL LIFE STUFF when I bother them for rp, so I've become less active as an rper which is PRETTY UNCOOL of me
>> US No. 12403
3some rp nao

>> US No. 12404
I finally got a job. Sure it's just a contract job, boring as hell, and I have to get up 4 hours earlier than I usually do, but it pays above minimum wage, is airconditioned, and gives much needed job experience so hopefully I won't have to settle for working at Jack in the Box when this is through.
And I seem to have patched things up with one of my best friends who hasn't spoken to me in months.

So yeah, I'm reasonably content at the moment.
>> US No. 12406

Good for you! I bet you'll do great
>> US No. 12407
ugh the sex thread auto saged so I'll put this here.

I'm 20 years old, and still a virgin. This makes me feel really weird and I'd like to talk about it.
>> No. 12408
23 and I've never even kissed anyone, if that makes you feel any better.
>> CA No. 12409
I'd be up for that, actually.
>> CA No. 12411
I replied to it, but I'll repost it here. Gonna make a new thread too since I have a question inspired by your post.

re: your actual post - Nothing wrong with that. I'm 19, turning 20 before the year's out, and as far as I'm concerned I'm a virgin.

Wait till I move so I can actually get on steam/skype/whatever other messenger y'all wanna use
then we can DO ITTTT
>> US No. 12416
My dad says its totally fine for me to transfer, but I need to finish out the year first, because it's better money wise that way or something to do with scholarships.

But I just wanna move on ya know? I feel stuck, I just wanna leave and be an adult already and AUGH
>> US No. 12417
My entire job so far is fixing the mistakes of my predecesor. At least I can't do worse than her.
>> GB No. 12420
So yes, adventures and lessons in Frankfurt!
So get off plane, then arrive at hotel area. Turns out my aunt booked one in the red light district... oh boy. Hour after arriving, be attacked by a prostitute when I don't want none of her "Bow-jubs" So I scramble. Go into a bar where a girl sits next to me and the woman behind the bar asks "You buy drink for nice girl yes?" but I've seen this scene, and quickly finish my cola and get the hell outta there, but not before being confronted by Molestria, the mole queen about not liking her girls. AT that point, called it a night and slept. Next day is interview with Nintendo. YAY! I see the city on my way and slowly realise that Frankfurt is the red light district of Germany for the most part with a gleaming business centre. The interview goes really well I think, nice and friendly staff as well. Then its back to the city where I proceed to bake in the sun as I wander, even spotting the hooker from before with her pimp, but at this point I'm just nopeing it outta there.

So lessons learned? Don't go to Frankfurt.
>> US No. 12421

Yikes, be careful. You'd be shocked at how easy it is to pick up a prostitute on accident.

In other news, my sweetheart is a saint for helping me these past few days. There's nothing like losing your job and having to move back in with Mom, only to discover that she needs everything you make to keep herself afloat.

Needless to say, I've been stressed.
>> US No. 12426
That feeling when you try to RP with someone you've barely talked to for years, and you can't agree on ANYTHING. Feels bad man.
>> US No. 12427
I can't get facade to work on my computer

this is not okay
>> US No. 12428
More in the saga of 'Disaster Follows Me Wherever the Fuck I Go.'

Moved back in with Mom, give her the majority of my paycheck, only to discover yesterday that the landlord sold our house.

So I'm moving to Texas, to be with Ariel. Her parents have a room I can rent.

I'm going to have to sell my turtle, because she can't travel with me. I'm also going to have to sell my Mac (being the only computer who's stuck by me longer than any other machine) and buy a laptop.

I'm going to ride the Greyhound bus from Gainesville, GA, to Corpus Christi, TX.

Let's see how long I'm there before I manage to fuck that up too.
>> CA No. 12430
So I can't breathe. This is fun. I've never dealt with breathing problems before this summer, but this is almost like asthma, and only triggered by humidity.
Anyone got any help for me?
>> US No. 12431
Do you ever feel like you don't really have any close freinds? And do you ever wonder why, or whats wrong with you to make people not like you?

How does someone even BE social anyway?
>> US No. 12432
Well it can't always be bad can it? Surely it will eventually get better.
>> CA No. 12433
After watching a makeup artist competition show on Out TV (The Gay channel, if you couldn't figure it out from the name), I've come to a conclusion.

I have no problems with gay men, if they are normal people, normal guys, who just like sex with other men. Hell, even if they like to cook, and sew, and watch chick flicks, I'm okay with them. However, if a gay man dresses like Lady Gaga and acts like a bitchy girl from Real Housewives of New York, then I have to change the channel. Cannot deal.
The guy's name is Maxi, too, and I can thing of is maxi pads.
>> US No. 12434

>> US No. 12435

That actually DOES sound like you problems with gay men, and your trying to rationalize it and it sounds like "as long as they dont step out of line then it's fine!"

I mean, its totally cool to not care for over top flamboyancy, but you shouldn't have a problem with it purely because a gay guy is doing it. If you have a problem with that stuff it should apply to everyone, not just gay guys.
>> CA No. 12436

You do understand it's a reality show right? (I'm assuming it is at least) They often tell these people to act as wild and ridiculous as possible. And it's easy to edit it to appear so. And if people want to act like Lady Gaga, they are into theatrics. Their ego is often played up in front of strangers and the camera.

On another note, just had a Dinosaurs marathon in my blanket fort. Best night I ever had. Feelin' fine.
>> AU No. 12438

>> CA No. 12439
Honestly, if I knew any straight men that acted that way, I'd probably hate them, too. So I really don't think it's anything to do with the sexuality.
I dunno. Find me a straight man that acts like that, and I can compare, but until then, all I've got to go on is a gay guy who cries when his client's makeup runs (and no, not exaggerating), and wears a disco-ball for a hat.

I might be okay with the flamboyancy if women are doing it, though. I find they can get away with more in my eyes, for some reason. The bitchiness always bothers me, of course, but I have no problem with Lady Gaga. She's fucked up as hell, but you gotta admit, her outfits are interesting.
>> US No. 12441
So, I woke up sick, Snuggletooth had a cheek infection that I had to drain and clean, and my ex's grandmother called me a sick bitch.

She kept spamming me with all kind of ads, and I used to send her polite little emails letting her know her account was probably hacked, and that she needed to do something about it. Not too long ago, I got another 10 emails from her in one day, and I finally told her to knock it the fuck off, delete me, and never contact me again.

Her response was, and I quote "they must have a old list cuz i deletted ur sick ass along time ago bitch dont mail me again."

Um, it isn't my fault your grandson was a pedo and ugly as fuck. Stop spamming me and get over yourself.
>> US No. 12443
I want to pick a lot of you up and cuddle you when things go bad, but we haven't talked much so I don't wanna seem weird or creepy. (Especially you, Kit- you remind me of a good friend of mine, to the point where I actually thought you were her, until I realized your girlfriends had different names.)

Also, I'm still interested in starting up that Livestream network, but I don't know how many would be interested.
>> US No. 12444
internalized misogyny

being bitchy and overdramatic is a "female thing"
it's considered a general negative by society but it's way less negative if a woman does it because "eh, women, that's just how they are"
a man doing it is not only acting in a generally negative manner, he's also acting like a woman, a double-bad for double points

note: internalized
means it's not your fault consciously
means don't get upset because i'm not saying you're some kind of woman-hating redditor MRA i'm just saying you're a product of a misogynistic society the same as the rest of us are

your next step is to continue to think about how you feel and why and see what you get out of that and whether you can reconcile yourself to it being alright for a man to express feminine-coded behaviours
>> CA No. 12445
To a degree, I can. I work in theatre, so I'm no stranger to guys acting effeminate, but there's definitely a limit to it, for me. Wearing Mardi Gras masks in public when it's not Mardi Gras falls under that.
>> US No. 12446
Not gonna lie; I got warm and fuzzy for a moment.

I have no clue how livestreaming works, sadly, so I'm no help here..
>> BR No. 12447

Well...i'm okay with that, i guess.

My bfriend is always saying to me to open up more/talk to people (hard thing to do, in or out the internet)...so, i guess i should start with this, especially because, when i lurk around here, i read about problems and opinions that i have some experience with. And, although i refrain to say anything around, i kind of have this little desire to talk... but i always prevent myself of doing so because of...lots of things.

But maybe with this little incentive, things may change.

So, it's a feelin' of "hey...maybe this will work, after all. Maybe it'll not be so bad".

I support this idea. =3 If i can help somehow, please tell me.

(sorry about any bad english)
>> US No. 12448
Are you Error...as in from Tumblr?

Because if so, I just want to let you know that my girlfriend (the girl who draws Mick) adores your art, and so do I. You're incredibly talented.
>> BR No. 12449

Oh no, dear. I don't even have a tumblr (i'm just an envious lurker around there, hehe).

I'm sorry.
>> US No. 12450
It's fine, just thought I'd ask since you both have the same username and are from the same region. :)
>> US No. 12451
I'm glad I made you feel warm fuzzies! (What's your Tumblr, btw?)

Livestream isn't that difficult! I stream a little art on there myself, and sometimes me playing games.
>> US No. 12452
I don't have one, because I have no artistic talent to speak of, so me having a Tumblr would be kind of pointless.

Onto feels; I'm crying because of what I've had to put Snuggletooth through these past few days. I've had to 1.) open the infection bump with a needle, 2.) press the pus out, and 3.) give her salt soaks and apply rubbing alcohol. She's in a terrible amount of pain, I can tell, but there's honestly nothing I can do for it, and it kills me that she's actually gotten to the point where she hides from me.
>> PL No. 12454
Finally got a great shrink, too bad it's a tad expensive (gonna roll 270 tomorrow for 2 more sessions), but their major plus is that they'll help to separate important/true thoughts from just random associations that might trigger bad mood/memories without the magic pills that could ruin my metabolism system.
Also I need to stop thinking about gross scenes, I have a lot of positive thoughts connected to them through said associations now and it makes me sad. It kinda triggered the need to see a psychiatrist, but it was long overdue (and I've seen Grudge, Zombieland, Shaun of the Dead and Dead Snow and nothing bothered me as much as Gyo did, perhaps because I want to stop projecting those images on real people, I've never had this problem before. Also yeah kinda frustrated that it makes overweight people look horrible). At least I felt good after the first session.

Also finally got a 22'' monitor, major improvement from the 1440x900 one, gotta work hard to finally get a decent, steadily paying job and not rely on contests.

Also tumblr isn't only for art, of course you can appreciate art of other people there, upload gifs, music etc or just work with text posts.
>> US No. 12455
I think I've resigned myself to the fact that, no matter what, my sweetheart is never really going to be mine.

Granted, I don't want to be the only person in her life...but I don't think being her only lover would be too much to ask.

I'm moving there in four months, and I just tried to talk to her about what's going to happen with that abusive son of a bitch she's still seeing.

She won't talk to me about it.

What am I supposed to do, sit at home while she's out with him? Know that he's touching her, kissing her...it makes me sick.

All I've ever wanted was a happy relationship with myself and one other person. I am apparently not even worth that.
>> US No. 12456
File 134386226441.jpg - (4.92KB , 320x185 , hebyisgordonfreeman.jpg )
>>gushing over an artist who draws very masculine men and very butch women
>>"why do you find these women attractive, they're overweight and masculine, do you have a mental disorder"

I hate the kinds of people who say this.
>> US No. 12457
How did I even twist my ankle I DON'T DO ANYTHING EVER
Seriously - how the fuck did this happen.
I'm just laying in bed, and suddenly it starts hurting and throbbing and it's swollen now and idkkk...?
>> US No. 12458
maybe you didn't.keep an eye on your body temp. maybe it is infected somehow?
/brother had a septic hip when he was younger, not fun.:C
>> AU No. 12461
doesn't matter that you dont do anything, all it takes is one bade step...

hell, i fractured my ankle running on perfectly flat ground without so much as a stumble
>> CA No. 12462
Bye job!

Officially unemployed. Thrilled. I never have to get up at six in the morning again, unless the house is on fire. And even then...
>> US No. 12464
After 5 long years, I've returned to the realm of PC ownership.

This means I can play vidya again

>> US No. 12465
File 134405663963.jpg - (14.08KB , 320x318 , i-love-you.jpg )
I have been on and off this site for years, and also had some problems on this ongoing thread that you guys helped me out with and even with no responses on some things it was just nice to be able to get it out somewhere I wouldn't be judged. You all are so awesome. Neptune bless you guys.
>> US No. 12467
File 134408568082.png - (134.87KB , 499x280 , lemongrabsmile1.png )
Anon, I...
>> US No. 12478
So, I went out of my way to get a birthday gift for a freind, and she acted like it was annoying or something. God dammit I'm so sick of my friends acting like assholes. Just say thank you for fucks sake. We're slose enough where this shouldn't be awkward but you always manage to make it awkward fuck fuck fuck

How the hell does someone make friends that don't suck and what are the warning signs that someone is going to suck?

I have so many socializing problems I'm such a fucking social derp sometimes I swear

what the fuck is wrong with me and why don''t people like me. I wish I could see whatever it is so I could stop doing it
>> US No. 12479

No but seriously how does someone gauge there own social skills? I feel like Im killing all my close relationships and I have no idea what Im doing wrong or how to stop whatever it is Im doing?

What the hell is wrong with me and why can't I make friends easily? Am I just a douche and I don't realize it?
>> US No. 12482
I haven't had the exact same issues as you, but I don't have more than two or three friends and I have a hell of a time making new ones/keeping the old ones no matter how quiet, helpful, outgoing, engaging, inquisitive, nice or whatever I am. (If I'm myself, people seem weirded out. If I'm the opposite, people seem weirded out.) Of my limited number of friends, they only come back into contact with me when they need something. They don't reply to emails, IMs or phone calls until that point. Or they change their phone number, etc. without letting me know.

I think some people are just going to suck and that's something that's not easy to judge right off the bat. People change over time and grow up and apart.

Then again, it could be you, but I'd like to think most people can recognize when they're being a raging douche. Step back and look at your behavior as objectively as you can. Then, maybe try talking it out with your friend(s) about how you feel. If you're as close as you mentioned, that shouldn't hurt any. Hopefully.

Email's in the name, if you ever need an ear/eye.
>> US No. 12483

Thanks for the help
>> US No. 12484
>go to aunt's house,spend the night
>come home, fridge has kicked it,everything is spoiled
>> US No. 12486
D e v i a n t a r t pisses me off so much sometimes. It's just filled to the brim with stupid and unwillingness to learn from others, or even basic human decency.

I know you could say that about any website, but I feel like DA encourages it.
>> CA No. 12487
Someone's never been to tumblr.
>> US No. 12488

To be fair, tumblr can be a little bit better
>> US No. 12491
I agree, but I've had an almost unfairly good run on Tumblr. All the people I follow are the chillest of the chill, and I've never even seen any legit drama on there. IT'S GREAT.

I'm still trying to get a handle on it - I can never remember to tag stuff, and I'm not sure how to go about doing things like putting up my stories on it, but so far, I count myself lucky to know so many awesome peeps on Tumblr.

DA, though...

Looking back, I can't really say anything I've done on DA has served me in the long run - even considering my relative "popularity" on it. I liked starting over on the Chan with a more mature audience.

Wow I tend to rant a lot at 3 am who wudda thunk
>> AU No. 12492
File 134461094355.jpg - (24.47KB , 200x190 , tumblr_m8jeu7v9LI1qg0bnzo1_250.jpg )
of course it is. there's no unwillingness to learn on tumblr because no matter what you do, how bad your art is, how completely out of touch your beliefs are or how absurd you sound when you claim you're a pan-dimensional omnisexual angel-wolf or whatever there will be someone to pat you on the back

no one needs to learn because everyone is aspecial snowflake amazing artist
>> US No. 12494
I like hoping for the best in people and that it is genuinely being nice on Tumblr, not butt-patting.

I have had several people redline my art there, which I am greatful for, compared to zero (and several trolls) on dA. Not that dA is completely horrible, though, it's just that weirdly enough the site that isn't intended as an art site is more receptive for crit.

My only beef with Tumblr is that sometimes people unfollow you for making any kind of post about your life, even if you're saying "I went somewhere and it was fun", not whining.
>> US No. 12496
the difference being that on tumblr things get around outside of their initial circle more readily and if your shitty art or strange and culturally-appropriative "identity" get reblogged outside of your social circle then you will in fact get criticism

and/or dogpiling from strangers

there's less insulation to the hugbox on tumblr, but it cuts both ways

(posting something dumb/bad will get you criticized, but criticizing something dumb/bad will also get you criticized)

that's still better than No One Daring To Criticize Anyone For Anything Ever tho
>> US No. 12499
Aaah. I've actually never seen these guys who identify as wolves or as ethnicities they aren't or anything, I've seen a lot of trans* guys and girls, though, and I consider that legit.

I see less people being actually shitty artists and more really awesome ones who just don't get attention. I am sorry if I hugboxed anyone, but I feel bad whenever anyone says "hello, I am sad, could I have a hug please". But then again I like most people and most peoples' art, so I am probably not the best source on this.

I do think people are bad at receiving crit, but it is moreso people going "I am not going to become a professional artist anyways, only art students should get critique". But this is not a Tumblr problem as much as it is a human one.
>> AU No. 12500
>and I consider that legit.

congratulations on not being an complete asshole!

i would give you a gold star but i've already posted it
>> US No. 12502
I'm afraid to ask what I did that was assholish. I'm sorry for it, though.
>> US No. 12503

Don't worry about it, you didn't do any thing wrong.
>> CA No. 12504
My family is mildly worried about my 2-year-old cousin having autism or aspergers or something, based on symptoms that I think can be shrugged off, but I'm not sure:

Symptom 1, based off of what my friend with aspergers says she does, and what others like her often do- walking on tiptoes.
He was unable to walk steadily for a long time because of it.
Symptom 2- things with wheels. He could care less about blocks, books, or stuffed animals. only cars, trucks, or trains. Always, and he just sits there, focusing on them, playing with them for hours.

Thoughts? I personally think he's fine- he's cuddly and happy like any other baby, but he sometimes tiptoes, and is ridiculously obsessed with trucks. That's all.
>> US No. 12507
Snuggletooth's dying, everyone. Her abscess has gotten even worse, and now her cheek is broken where the infection is eating away at her bone structure.

At this point, there's nothing I can do.

I'm going to have to put her to sleep.
>> US No. 12508
I'm a cynic hiding under a thick shell of optimism because I'm afraid to accept that the world sucks a lot of the time and that people will not stop being homophobic or deragatory against women or other peoples' religions and shit.

I want people to change and I can't even change my own life, let alone others'.

Fuck. I have no idea what to do.
>> US No. 12509

Oh my gosh I'm so sorry. I know how hard that is, two of my pets passed away last summer.
>> BR No. 12510

I'm so sorry, too. It's good, though, that you have the courage to think what is better for Snuggletooth (and not make her suffer slowly till the end). I congratulate you.

Be strong. I don't know if you already had passed through such horrible experience, but...you will need it (i know the feeling. I do).

Good luck.
>> US No. 12511
File 134498936832.png - (64.20KB , 550x400 , 129791308443.png )
I'm with you, too. I'm sorry about your (bird?). I lost my dear pet rat this passed January, so I know how hard that can be. I'm sure Snuggletooth will be happier wherever she has gone.

>> US No. 12512
File 13449894644.png - (31.48KB , 180x148 , 129919854399.png )
Been kind of disappointed in myself about my lack of inspiration to get past this killer Writer's block I've been having.

But then today, I realized that, just because I'm not writing, it doesn't mean I can't contribute to the site!

Things are getting interesting - the whole MvM update has brought back TONS of oldfags and newfags into the fandom again - and the site, too, by extension. I might be one person, but I'm going to do all I can to be a cheerleader and encourage people to make more stuff - whatever it might be!

It doesn't mean I'm going to be all hugboxxy - I'm not going to PRAISE things I despise just for the sake of being "nice" - I've just decided to put forth the effort of ACTUALLY COMMENTING when I see something I like (something I'm sure a lot of us are guilty of not doing!).

If anyone's with me, I'd love having help to get this place bustling like it used to be!

>> CA No. 12513
File 13450006908.gif - (0.96MB , 495x325 , preach.gif )

I got some new ideas for stories I've been tweaking on. I agree that people need to critique more often on this site. But the drama is overwhelming at times. It's why I avoid it all.

In other news, I'm studying for my drivers test, and all I want to do is play video games.
>> US No. 12514
There is something wrong with my mind. Something that should not be. I can feel it. But I don't know what. Just an overall sense of wrongness.
And I hate it.
>> US No. 12517

So, I took her to the herp vet today. He told me to wait one more week.

She's on painkillers in the meantime, but I wish he hadn't asked me to wait...

I'm so afraid that I'm going to get my hopes up, just to see her get sicker and sicker.

Her shell's peeling, which is normal for her age, but it's in chunks instead of scales. Her body simply can't hold up anymore.

I'm giving her calcium to try and help her rebuild herself, but I don't know if she'll pull through...

I'm just so scared, guys.
>> BR No. 12518

For how long is she with the inflammatory process and infection? When did you notice it?

Did he take a look at her mouth? What he asked you and what he explained to you about the whole thing?

Did he take a sample of the secretion?

She is a chelonian, isn't she? Their metabolisms are pretty slow...so infections and stuff evolve slowly as well. Maybe it's because of this he's asking for you to wait.

What he prescribed to her?

(i'm thinking now that i'm acting too rude, perhaps. I'm sorry. If you don't want to answer, don't bother, please)
>> US No. 12519
Well, I noticed a week ago. Since then, I'd been draining the wound, cleaning it out, and giving her oral antibiotics.

The vet wants me to bring her in for antibiotic shots every other day.

He didn't swab the infection site, but he opened it and cleaned it again.

And the painkillers are a shot as well. It's just something like baby aspirin, he said. Those shots she gets daily, and i have to administer them myself.
>> BR No. 12520

I reread what you said before and you mentioned an abscess (sorry i didn't do this before. I'm so dumb). What it's aspect? Does it looks/feels like some kind of solid mass?

You see, abscesses in chelonians are very firm and very "cheesy", due to the fact they lack some enzymes in their immunological system that degrades the pus. They must be removed surgically...

Has your vet told you something like this? Or he diagnosed something else?

One week is "early" to say that she will die or not. Her healthy condictions before were okay, right (balanced diet, correct hygienic handling, etc?)

Well, anything, ask him, really. Don't be afraid to do so (to look dumb or something like this).

Good luck, i'm rooting for you both.
>> US No. 12521
I did a fair amount of research before taking her to the vet.

I asked him about removing it surgically, and he said he wouldn't. She's too small for him to do it safely.

I know a week is early, but when I took her in, the right side of her face had collapsed inwards.

She seems to be recovering, though...she's eating more, now, and isn't sleeping as much.
>> CA No. 12522
Preoccupation with death anxiety attack's back. Why is it always right before my period? Does my body know my eggs are slowly dying one by one or something? WTF.
>> CA No. 12526
There's an eleven-year old vocal prodigy on TV, and she's fucking amazing at singing, and I'm just sitting here, like 'Welp. I quit.'

Is it bad, though, that I feel better about the fact that her diction isn't the best? She can't do D's and T's well. Her phrasing is beautiful, but her diction sucks, and mine is good, so I feel better about myself.
>> US No. 12527
Do not base your confidence in your abilities on the skills of others. There is always someone better.

Unless you're officially the best, I guess.
>> CA No. 12528
Yes, but she's eleven, and she's ridiculously better than anyone I've ever seen, except in terms of diction.





Nowhere near the same, in terms of skill, and she's literally half my age.

Just...holy fuck. And it just makes me feel worse because I keep trying to work on these acapella projects and they keep turning out shiiit.
>> US No. 12529
Come now, your singing is pretty good. No reason to feel bad about it.
But you are right, that child is unusually good. An anomaly. Do not let her talent make you feel less of yourself. She is obviously a robot.
>> CA No. 12532
Fifty bucks says she's the next terminator.

Just runs around with a machine gun, operatically belting "Come with me if you want to LIIIIIIVE".
>> US No. 12534

(And I am on my phone, so I can't add a picture, but imagine it is that one of R. Lee Ermy pointing at you and yelling. )
>> AU No. 12535
Child prodigies eventually plateau and then go on to develop substance addiction in their adult years as they wander through life trying to reclaim the one thing that made them unique. So keep your chin up!
>> CA No. 12536



Out of curiosity, you guys remember that art thread we had going? Would you put musical things in that? Because feedback is my friend.
>> BR No. 12537

For animals that can survive a long time ignoring food, even in natural conditions, eating is a good sign. Eating is always a good sign, hehe.

I hope is everything okay with you guys, now...


Well, i'm not well-versed in music, vocal timbres, perfect notes and stuff but i listened you and i think you have a beautiful voice that is pleasant to hear. Like i said, i'm not a knowing person about this, but you have a sweet voice...

Go practice more. You are gifted...
(sorry about the bad english ><)
>> US No. 12538

The shots are helping; she's recovering amazingly. I'll post a pic of her when she heals up a bit more.
>> US No. 12539
I found the worlds greatest terrible fanfic on DA today and I am highly hoping i can get someone to do a reading of it, but at the same time, I don't wanna discourage the author because this shits hilarious

Decisions decisions
>> CA No. 12540
If you post a link to it, I might be able to do a reading of it. 10+ years doing theatre, and everyone's always told me how excellent I am at reading.
>> US No. 12542
A couple of my friends are worrying me.

Now, they know I believe that gender is a spectrum, and you can identify as something different than what you were born as biologically. But one is using the same logic because one of them identifies as physically disabled (when they are not) and the other identifies as a different cartoon character every month or so, claiming online quizzes determine what character she is incarnate.

I want to explain to them that this isn't the same thing, but I don't know how.
>> US No. 12543
so a "trans-abled" and otherkin,huh? I'm not sure what to think about the "trans-abled", but as for your otherkin friend:
>> US No. 12545
Thanks. I think that's a really well-written way to say it. I just don't know how to tell her, if at all.

My friend is a MtF transgendered woman, and I support her all the way, but she's been trying to convince me that all of a person's personality is as fluid as gender. When she told me she was also a fictional character incarnate as a human, I told her "You are you and not anyone else." She responded with "we should not subscribe to binary labels sweetheart~"
>> US No. 12546
even if someone is an incarnate of someone,they are not that person now.
If that were true my dad would be siegeing the Great Wall or something.(according to a psychic he talked to, he supposedly rode with Genghis Khan or something in a past life.)
>> US No. 12547
My mother, knowing that she can no longer be physically abusive to me, has switched to verbal abuse.

The target? My sweetheart, my future choices...Hell, she even insists that I'm too 'retarded' to take care of myself.

I'm mentally damaged, sure...but that's her fault. I didn't ask her to use drugs while she was pregnant with me. I didn't ask to be beaten.

I have a small speech impediment thanks to her drug use, and I know that I'm lucky I escaped with simply that. She uses this as an example to prove that I'm slow.

I resent this right down to my core.
>> BR No. 12548
"My mother, knowing that she can no longer be physically abusive to me, has switched to verbal abuse".

...i really wonder if this is a pattern or somethin'.

What's it? Are they afraid that now they lack force to make it hurt? Or maybe afraid of physical retaliation (in my case, the last just doesn't make sense, since i'm very small and weak)?

Well...sorry to relate to your story. You surely has a tougher time than me. Don't want to offend you or somethin' like that...

It's just that i'm too tired.
>> US No. 12549

This is just my two cents, but I really cannot grasp fictionkin - but not really for the same reasons as other people. I totally believe that gender is a spectrum, and I can understand and even agree with some otherkin and therians. But the thing that really bugs me about fictionkin is the idea that you 'are' something that someone else created. The creator knows things about that character that no one else does, and therefore, I seriously fail to see how the hell anyone could be an "incarnate" of a character that, at best, only exists on a plane of reality within another person's mind. I try to look at all sides of all identities but I just... cannot get that one.
>> US No. 12550

It's because I have friends I can call to come get me, and the cops will actually listen to me now.

She used to beat the ever-living Christ out of me when I was younger. She had support from everyone at Church, though, and couple that with the fact that I fought back and was unruly at school, and the CPS could write it off as me being a 'trouble' child.

The one time I called them, they didn't do anything other than tell me I shouldn't lie about being abused, and offer my mother support classes. Oh, and I was beaten for calling them, too.

She went apeshit on my little brother the other day, though, and I managed to convince him to show the scratches on his shoulders and face to the school counselor. If it happens again, she could be taken into police custody.

I'm still frightened, though, and she's furious at me because I want to leave again. She's discovering that she can't keep me here, so she's turned the energy she used to expend on hitting me into energy for insulting every person in my life that I hold dear and trying to make me feel like I should be ashamed of my stuttering and slurring.

TL;DR: My mother is a calloused, heartless bitch.

Also, don't dismiss the things you're going through, as well. All suffering is relative, and you shouldn't downgrade yourself. :)
>> US No. 12551
You have my utmost sympathy. I'm in the same boat- I'm 21, I have depression and paranoia from growing up with parents who physically and verbally abused me, and once I started going to a psychologist, their response was "oh, you're insane, that makes you untrustworthy". They write off every fear I have as insanity or bullshit, and my mom is trying to guilt trip me because she tried to murder me and I called the cops on her. I'm the bad one, and she did nothing wrong. I have nowhere to go, though. My girlfriend lives across the country.
>> US No. 12552

That's the way my mother is. All I want is to sustain myself where I can feel safe, and I'm apparently a terrible human being for wanting thus.
>> GB No. 12553
I do not have the physical and emotional horrors everyone above me describes. I just have fits of melancholia.

All is well, I have a job, a home, a lover, a semblance of a social life, and still, *still*, I find myself sitting down, curling up, and hiding under a pillow for a few hours until I stop wanting to cry and scream.

I'm not sure quite what's causing it, or what I'm doing wrong. It doesn't follow any pattern, so it's not likely to be tied to my hormonal cycle. It's just... occasional bouts of mind-crushing sadness, surrounded by a feeling that my brain is being suffocated by cotton-wool as my thoughts slow and I stop being able to think, articulate, understand, explain.

I'm a bit worried that my brain is betraying me. I don't want to lose the use of it. Nothing terrifies me more than losing control of my mind.
>> US No. 12554
I feel like my life is going well right now though I want to raise my GPA so I can go to graduate school. My GPA is a 2.68 and I have 3 years to raise it to a 3.0 I feel like I can do it. I feel like I'm worth it.

But is it possible? Can I make this feeling of determination last? What do I do when I feel burned out, or when a teacher asks me to write papers on topics I just don't care about.

I'm excited nervous anxious happy optimistic and scared about my future. I just have so many emotions right now I don't now. i just wanted to spill the beans.

I love my school, (I go to the Milwaukee institute of art and design) and I feel like I learn a lot here, and I feel like my program is god (not the animation or time based media department though. There the only major that sucks, if you wanna be an animator, please don't go to miad.) but at the same time I'm scaaaaaaared.

also I would like to say


I am so sorry. I am so incredibly sorry your mother is a monster who chose to abuse you instead of cherishing you. I'm so so so sorry that you had to go through that. No one should ever hurt a child. it's taking advantage of something weaker than you so that you can feel in control, so they can feel powerful. There are no excuses for abusing some one, remember that. There are ways to deal with problems that aren't cruel or violent. There is always a nice way to do things.

I also wanna let you know you're special.
>> US No. 12555

I forgot to say this; You're all wonderful people, and I'm glad to have met you. :)

If anyone wants to vent or rant to me outside of the 'Chan, my email's in the name.
>> KR No. 12557
Suddenly, I got urge to make all people who are in tf2 fandom come to tf2 chan and have a conversation sharing each of their informations.
Many of tf2fans seem to be in tumblr, but they would more easily wathc, read others' works and share ideas and informations if most of them are concentrated in one community like tf2chan.
I don't think the number of people in this fandom decreased. But I feel that the chan has become much more quiet than before it exploded 2 years ago.
>> KR No. 12558
The question is, wat made tf2chan have become so?
Srsly, I wanna know the reason.
>> AU No. 12559
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm i dont think that'd be a good idea for reasons i'll let someone else explain

i think the origin story is basicly people on /v/ got sick of the founders posting their manporns there so the founder pretty much went "well screw you, we'll make our own imageboard. with blackjack, and hookers"
>> US No. 12561
Unrelated to chan drama, though, it's also people falling out of the fandom, finding different ones that interest them more, becoming too busy irl, stuff like that.
>> BR No. 12564

Thank you very much for saying this... it's good, for once in a while, (try) to help (be somewhat useful) someone. I'm glad that apparently i made you feel well, in some way or another. =3

But, you guys made me wonder: is a impression of mine, or the TF2 fandom attracts people who had some serious issue in some point of their lifes? Or this fandom makes people feel more confortable to talk about it(there's a huge difference in between this two points)?

(And, by serious issues, i mean: physical/sexual abuse, drug problems of some sort, etc?)

I, personally, don't believe that there's more people with this kind of trouble inside this fandom, especifically, than in the others. Maybe , in the other fandoms, there's just no room to talk about as it has in this fandom?

Keep in mind i don't want to be disrespectful to anyone. It's just that i've been thinking about this(especially because every time i take a look around here, there's always some sort of...confession that is like "my uncle abused me when i was young" or something), and i'm curious to read some different opinions.

So, what do you guys think?

Please, keep in mind it's just a question, a curiosity. I don't want to make anyone feel bad.
>> US No. 12565
back in school, nervous about that

first couple of days with my new roommates and theres already drama

I think I'm just not meant to have a drama free social life jesus christ. I didn't do anything, but apparently two of my four roommates are already showing ugly sides to there personalities. Roommate A had her laptop stolen, so she thought saying the N word a couple of times out of frustration is hunky-dorey. Roommate B does not understand the meaning of social fucking ques and doesn't get when you should leave someone alone. me, roommate B and roommate c, console her for a bit, but when it's time to let her be, me and roommate c leave but B wont leave her alone. Aside from the racial slurs, which really made me uncomfy, roommate A managed to calm down.

but noooooo suddenly roommate B thinks A doesn't like her now.

I hate these people already. This semester is going to suck.

Please. Please just shut up both of you, I'm serious. I don't need this stress right now. Oh my god.

how do you deal with roommate drama? I'm actually asking.
>> US No. 12566
I definitely know what you mean, I've noticed that a disporportionate amount of the people I've made good friends with on the internet (a lot from TF2chan) have had and/or still have serious issues with their body or mind, and it weirds me out that so many of them have problems when I have none, the biggest issue in my life along those lines being that I'm hard of hearing in one ear. Feels a bit like I'm the odd person, sometimes, that being normal isn't normal in this case.

Then again maybe I'm just too damn awesome and they all look up to me as a shining example of what a great person they can aspire to be. Nah.
>> US No. 12567

I'm sorry I need to continue this post, there are a few things I forgot.

I'm so scared. School starts tomorrow and I'm nervous, I'm incredibly nervous. I just wanna go home, I want my best friend to come back, (she's taking a semester off then transferring) , I want to have a place to come to after school that I don't have to hear the N word sprouted by some white girl. I want to have someone whose close to me emotionally.

But I feel like this

Someone who I think is nice at first will turn out to be a gigantic asshole

Someone who is nice to be and loves me will start becoming distant from me

People just wont wanna be around me

Do I have to be a racist homophobic careless douchebag who doesn't care about anyone but themselves to in order not to have a terrible social life, or do I have to give up anything resembling happiness in order to do the right thing.

I just wanted roommates who would let me be. I didn't want this.

Also, I'm sorry for my bitching and moaning, I know this sounds like typical kiddy affair, So my supreme apologies.
>> GB No. 12568

You won't always be the only reasonable one surrounded by idiots. You won't always be the only geek, or the only non-local, or the only non-racist. You will meet a wonderful range of people, most of whom won't be your flatmates, and some of whom will eventually be your friends.

Tips from when I went to university-
- try to keep things neutral with roommates, if they don't react well after you (politely) explain that you don't like racist language.
- if roommates continue to be difficult to be around, cultivate other places to spend your time where possible. It's avoidance of the problem, yes, but if the choice is a stressful atmosphere in your room so you can't study, or quiet-time for yourself in the late-night labs, pick the labs. You're here to learn, not to put up with bullshit.
- this too will pass. Most people go through a few friends and circles of friends at high school and university. Some of them will stay, some of them will fade out, and some of them will turn out to secretly be awful. Sometimes you may feel alone. That's just humans for you. But you'll find people, and you'll develop good, strong, reliable friends, and you don't have to compromise your principles for it. This, I swear to you.

perspective - I'm 24 and after a seriously rocky start at university when I was 18 I'm now still in touch with some of my friends from back then, but my main social circle is one I've cultivated from all over the place. Uni, clubs, events, even internet. I thought I was screwing up quite often, but things have turned out fine and I have learned from my cockups and the cockups of others. My life is good, my friends are lovely, and none of them are racists or misogynists or homophobes or whathaveyou. I've been pretty much set since about age 20/21, it just took a couple of years away from home for me to get myself really sorted out. You'll get sorted out, too. You won't be alone.
>> US No. 12569
Never having been as into a fandom as I have been into TF2, I'm not sure whether or not it is something unique to TF2 or just fandoms in general. I've heard from other people that other fandoms they've been heavily involved in attract people with problems and that those problems more often than not come out during one-on-one RPs/IMs/chats. I believe TF2chan is the first place I've seen people present their problems so publicly and, whether that's more to do with the fandom or the chan or the supposed anonymity of the internet, I couldn't say.

The people I've met through the TF2 fandom and gotten to know, with very few exceptions, have serious mental health issues ranging from depression/suicidal thoughts to being overcontrolling, manipulative assholes. In my experience, it's just a matter of time before something bad comes out during an online conversation. That's why I now keep mine strictly RP-related, apart from saying hello and goodbye.
>> US No. 12570

Oh my gosh

dude, I was the anon with the problems, you're a sweetheart, that makes me feel so much better and gives me a lot of perspective. Thank you thank you thank you
>> US No. 12571

I have no idea, but I find it kind of comforting. I don't feel so alone when I know someone else is having trouble in their life...not that I like the fact that something's wrong, but more that I like that people are willing to share.


That's awful! I can't offer much in the way of practical advice, because I've never had a roommate, but if anything, it would be best just not to get caught in the drama, and keep your head up.
>> CA No. 12575
Discussing this with my mom- mostly directed towards women who wish to someday be mothers, but guys can answer, too.

You have a baby. Newborn, in need of love. Of course, you get some time off to take care of it initially, but only a few months, and then you have to go back to work.
Now, you are offered a choice: You can either go back to the job you've worked super hard to obtain (and you love it there, too!), or you can stay home with your baby, and whatever children you have in the future, and get paid to do it, but you're never allowed to do the work you love.

What would you pick? Would you be emotionally fulfilled just being a mother/father?
>> US No. 12576
Kid comes first. Always. I'd be heartbroken to leave my job, but I'm going to (hopefully) be an artist. It's not like I can't go back to it someday. You only get one chance to not fuck up a kid.
>> CA No. 12577
What if the scenario called for you never ever EVER getting to go back to your job? Even when the kid's 18, 25, 30, and out of the house, for whatever reason, your job is gone and you can never do that work again.
Would you still pick the kid?

I ask only because I honestly don't know. Being a mom is one of my must-do's in my life, but I don't know if I could give up theatre forever to do it. Thankfully I could always volunteer, so that wouldn't ever be the case, but in a scenario like this, I don't know what I'd do.
I love babies, but my theatrical projects are like my babies. Rock and a hard place, yo.
>> US No. 12578
SO I realized how pointless it was to put my talentless scribbles online, and deleted my D-A account.

Because fuck it.
>> GB No. 12579
You can work. It will be fine. Do not give up half your life's blood for the other half when they can coexist.

Kids turn out just fine, even raised by working parents, even raised by single working parents. If you take time for your kid when your kid needs you - an early afternoon off to pick them up from their first day of school, leaving off weekend drinks with friends in favour of time with your little one, that sort of thing - you should be fine.

If your work is your love and your identity, and you know that losing it will very much cripple a part of you, then giving it up entirely for the kid isn't fair to you or the kid. Kids are smarter than they seem, and they can pick up that Ma or Da's unhappy and missing something. If you're still loving them, looking after them, helping them, all the appropriate parent stuff, then you won't screw your kid up by also working. And you'll be able to continue when the kid's grown, where it's far harder to get back into any job if you've been out of it for the last decade or two.

My Ma was a single working mum with her own business and often away for multiple days at a run on one thing or another, but neither me nor my sister are irredeemably screwed up. I even managed to get her into gaming, though she's a console gamer to my PC.
>> CA No. 12580
It was just a hypothetical scenario. I work in theatre and writing, so it's pretty flexible for having kiddies.

Catpcha: Usissy mussulman. WUT.
>> US No. 12581
That's the nice thing about artistic careers-- you'll never be too old, and there'll never not be a need for it.
>> No. 12582
My parents were workaholics, so I spent a fair amount of my childhood being raised by my grandmother. I don't begrudge them for it. Eventually it may be something I'll have to do. It would be heartbreaking to work so hard for this degree and never put it to use. Besides, they can redeem themselves by looking after my odorous babies while I pursue my glamorous career. Heh heh heh.
>> No. 12583
So the friend that I have been hoping to have a relationship with, and who has seemed to be open to that idea, has said in no uncertain terms that she wants us to just be friends.
Continuing to be forever alone. Depression.
>> No. 12589
I'm really hoping I can come home this weekend. I've been away from my family for nearly 3 whole weeks, and I miss them. I also miss my kitties. Recently one of my cats, Cleo, gave birth to her first kitten! I wanna see the new kitten so bad. My mom sent me pictures of him. He's very cute, and he has a smiley face pattern on his back. I hope I get to visit. Seeing a picture doesn't compare with being able to see him in real life. I wanna visit home so bad, and I hope my current assignment doesn't mess that up for me.
>> US No. 12590
File 134633222851.jpg - (62.01KB , 717x960 , NewKitten.jpg )
Here's a pic of the kitten. Hold the pic upside down, and his back looks like it has a smiley face on it. It's so cute!
>> US No. 12592
File 134637819830.jpg - (88.17KB , 796x904 , 1278882673210.jpg )
>living in basement with buddy
>his little brother runs all the time
>dogs howl and bark every time someone stomps/runs on the floor above us
>nonstop barking
>buddy yells at his brother to stop
>suddenly everyone else in the house is mad at my buddy for yelling
>"HE'S JUST A KID!" etc etc despite this kid being 8 and well aware of what he's doing but just doesn't care because he never gets punished
>no fucking peace and quiet unless we leave and dick around town
>tense as fuck, dogs always barking and when we lock them out they scratch and whine nonstop

Nothing better then being backed up into a corner in your own home.

At least I have some paint/pens to mess around with.. I haven't done stuff in a long while. I'm just letting it come to me on its' own. Forcing that stuff isn't good. It'll happen when it happens. At least I've drawn a bit. Also, a possible roadtrip to Michigan! That'd be a nice getaway, since it's only a few hours drive...

also, lol at the steam store being spammed with Gotham City Imposters DLC because it went F2P. Figures.
>> US No. 12595
File 134643988579.jpg - (48.33KB , 650x365 , 1341862154046.jpg )
>also, lol at the steam store being spammed with Gotham City Imposters DLC because it went F2P. Figures.

I'm more amused by Greenlight being full of almost nothing but:
Shitty games ported from XBLIG
8 bit retro indie games that probably aren't actually 8 bit or retro
Minecraft knockoffs
F2P MMO of Chinese slave factory
Copyright infringement
weaboo dating sims
>> US No. 12597

Honestly I haven't even touched Greenlight since I knew it would be full of shit. It needs a few months to actually start producing good stuff though, like mod sites.

Also I hate that feeling when you can't relax in your own home and nobody gives a shit about you and makes you feel like the bad guy for wanting some basic respect (not stomping around at 12 in the morning for instance).
>> US No. 12598
Facebook is so weird to me

I just can't talk about myself as much as facebook demands. It's like, the whole site is about being like "TODAY I DID THIS BLARGH BLARGH BLARGH"

Thats so weird to me. That's like the weirdest thing ever to me. I just can't be talk about what I'm up to that much. But I can do it on tumblr. I can do it on real life, but theres just something about facebook that weirds me out.

But I NEED to use it, ya know? For my social life and shit like that. But I'm just so uncomfortable on it and I don't know why.
>> AU No. 12599
Procrastination levels are reaching critical mass. I need to snap out of it or I'll die a hobo.
>> US No. 12600
I'm beginning to think there's a problem with me when I don't have a trigger and the only things that "trigger" me are spiders and small clustered holes. Both are phobias, though, and the small clustered holes one doesn't even happen enough times for me to say "Yeah I'm trypophobic please tag your pictures of small clustered holes so I can avoid them kthnx."

I try to tag things with trigger warnings and I usually avoid talking about subjects that could potentially trigger someone, but sometimes I feel like I'm not doing a very good job at it since I still don't know exactly what can trigger a person when I don't really have triggers myself.
>> US No. 12601
I tag anything that could possibly be relevant, trigger or not. Helps people find relevant posts they like and hide those they don't. I have a silly thing that bothers me too, so I have several variants on it Savior'd.
>> CA No. 12602
So my city is shit with money. They spent tons on this new lavish police plaza and bus depot (There's an art wall of cut sheet metal, painted, in front of it, and it cost $100,000.), and now, our fucking animal shelter has to shut down, because they do not get enough money from them to keep running. Over 75 cats, and I don't know how many dogs will be put down if they can't find them all homes, and we'll no longer have any sort of animal control program. And they'll be shut down in a week, and the city is doing FUCK ALL.

For more information, or to donate, please go here:

I'm just...URGH. I'm so mad at my city right now. It'd mean a lot to hear that someone out there will help/ feel the same sort of HURGH feelings at my city.
>> CA No. 12604
I wish my city spent money on police and public transit. Tax dollars here go to give the Oilers a new stadium or spent on a million dollar giant aluminum bat for a city with no baseball team.
>> CA No. 12605
Funnily enough, they don't spend shit on public transit. 6 major routes were cut just a few months ago, and I don't know how many smaller routes. My friend now has to walk for an hour just to catch a bus to the mall.

Oh, and best part? A while ago, the pension board was screwing stuff up. One man had the nerve to say so, and they charged him for slander. What ensued was a costly trial on the taxpayer's dime, and everything he said would happen to the pensions happened before he was acquitted. It ain't slander if it's 100% true.
>> US No. 12606
Last night I finally got to play MvM mode on a server not part of Valve's "forever in line". While playing, there was one player maining a Scout most of the waves and he actually went from player to player to perform the high-five taunt after a successful wave. Actually boosted my moral to really give it all I got despite some lag issues here and there.

Feels good. I like playing with others who have good spirits and play the game for fun, not a blood sport for ego-stroking.
>> US No. 12607
>> Work hard all night
>> Come home, looking foreword to talking to sweetheart
>> That asshole womanbeater of hers is there and won't let her talk to me

Fuck life, guys.
>> US No. 12609

My night in a nutshell.
>> US No. 12615
File 134689795051.gif - (51.00KB , 381x173 , rage.gif )

>> US No. 12616

Here. Have this:

>> US No. 12617
File 134690217243.png - (24.68KB , 125x125 , 132159361713.png )
omg is that you. Is that a tumblr of yours.

If so I will follow the SHIT out of that blog - make no mistake.
>> US No. 12618

Naw it's some other dudes i just thought it would make you feel better. I bet he'd appreciate the follow though.

My tumblr's are hotwatersupply and prettykickinghuh if you're curious.
>> US No. 12624
At my school everyone usually moves out of the dorms after there freshman year. I couldn't find a roommate this year, so I ended up going back for my junior year, even though I had an apartment my sophmore year (My roommate left, couldn't find another one)

Everyone is nice, but I feel like such a loser. I feel like everyone at school is going to think I'm immature. I'm embarrassed and I feel like an idiot.

One of my friends has everything going perfectly for them right now. They're always being called talented, everyone loves her, and things always seem to work out for her. She's not a loser, I'm a loser and I hate it.
>> CA No. 12630
So my friend came on, and told me she had to search for a song she'd heard on the radio, but didn't know the name of it. Naturally, I told her to google the lyrics- easy enough, right? Not so much when the song was a piano concerto.
Okay, alright. Not one to be deterred, I asked for the station. NPR. Go to their website, find a classical station, one that broadcasts in her area, and luckily enough, they happen to have a full playlist for every show, by date and time. Found that song in less than ten minutes

Fuck yea. So proud of myself.
>> US No. 12632
File 134695580923.jpg - (80.82KB , 398x326 , 132376652014.jpg )
You can mention me by name, you know.
>> CA No. 12634
Go back to napping, wimen.
>> US No. 12635
I have this lingering feeling that something is wrong with my body, but I can't put my finger on what, and I don't want to get surgery if I don't know what I want to change first. Just that there is something really wrong with me, physically, mentally, or emotionally, and if I fix it, most of the problems in my life will go away. I know that mentality is bullshit, though.
>> US No. 12636
I know that feeling. Unfortunately I also have no idea how to fix it.
>> No. 12641

Back when I was in school, there was this girl who did that exact thing.

She was a big outsider, mainly because she was wired and awkward to be around.

One year, when everyone returned from summer holiday, she had gotten plastic surgery to look like a model.
But nothing changed, because she still had the same shitty personality.

Point is; if you have already made an impression on the world around you, then it won't just go away because you change your look. You have to change your behaviour and work to make an new impression.
>> US No. 12644
It's not just my body I want to change, it's my entire self. If I got plastic surgery, it would only be to appease to others who won't stop giving me dirty looks whenever I get off the bus and go to class, or people who feel they have the right to tell me that I'll never get anywhere because I'm too ugly, and that people won't listen to what I have to say if they don't like my face. It feels like every decision I make, even if I'm not harming anyone, gets chastised and insulted. I'm just sick of it and feeling guilty about it.
>> US No. 12645
Why does every girl I like already have a boyfriend? Every single time. It is depressing.
>> No. 12646

Yeah, but all people, no matter what they look or act like, have that kind of problem.
Changing won't solve it, only self-confidence will.
>> CA No. 12648
So I've got this guy who's almost perfect, right? Totally completely almost perfect for me. But he only wants to have sex once a week. I'm alright not having sex every day, don't get me wrong, and I don't try initiating anything when I know he's gonna reject me ("Work really tired me out, honey.") but... only once a week?

I'm living with the source of my sexual frustration, and I feel like there's only so many times I can wank myself off before dying miserable and blue-balled.

>> CA No. 12649
I love him and everything, but I don't know how this is going to work long term. Also, we're engaged so if we break up it ain't gonna be easy.
>> US No. 12650

Well, try to come up with a compromise (also, invest in sex toys)

If you need it more than once a week, talk to him about your sexual needs, and his sexual needs. For instance, if he agrees to try going at it twice a week, You'll do something for him in return. Maybe try something you know he has a kink for, or wear something you know he likes. You could even shave to his preferences. As long as your both giving something reasonable
>> CA No. 12653

That's excellent advice! I have y'know, invested in quite a lot of sex toys that we use together and in my case, privately.

I have talked with him about it, a lot... he says he's too old, but he's only in his early twenties (???) and I'm a few years older than him.

When he said he'd be willing to try to have sex more, he ended up boredly wanking me off and then rolling over and going to sleep on a few occasions. It very quickly went back to once a week.

I dressed up for him and he said that lingerie is silly, because I go through all the trouble to put it on and then he has to take it off. He doesn't get the appeal, which baffles me.

He's not very interested in exploring my kinks, and the one thing he was curious to try was anal. I gave it a go for him, even though I wasn't 100% on the idea, and he was kinda meh about the act... I'm a very enthusiastic and responsive partner, and he's very stoic in bed. I can't properly read him, and wow, the more I type this the more terrible this situation sounds. I might be engaged to an asexual.

But really, thanks for the kind advice.
>> US No. 12654

It doesn't sound like he's very enthusiastic about sex. Maybe he's not the right guy for you.
>> US No. 12655

This was another part of my situation with the ex. Our sex was so boring when we had it, and other times, for me to get him to come to bed, I had to beg.

Sexual frustration is never easy, and it can cause more stress than you'd think. I would suggest talking to him again, but it seems like he simply doesn't want sex.

At this point, I would sit and seriously evaluate your relationship. Try and figure out if this kind of relationship is what you want.
>> CA No. 12656
Got a friend who now browses tf2chan. Not sure if I should stop namefagging now. I've never contributed ANYTHING, but I'm pretty attached.
>> CA No. 12657
I restrained myself today.

>Friend: Just realized that...... Today is 9/11. Huh, and guess what. I don't care. My day is going on as any other day.
>Some Girl:you... don't care? :/
>Friend: No, not really. My life isn't affected, and never will be.
>Some Girl: (More chatter)
>Friend: That's what I think. Yes it was sad, but come on. It's been forever ago. Stop crying over it already and move on. You're only living in the past, and not the present. Your life will never move on if you keep crying and sulking about it -.-"

>What I wanted to say: Yeah, well your grandfather's death affected even less people than 9/11. So did that breakup you bitched about for months on end. So did the death of your beloved pet. How's that feel?

But I said none of that, and for that, I'm proud of myself.

We shouldn't forever dwell on things, but to treat it as just another day isn't right, in my eyes. People died that day, unexpectedly, and violently, and they left behind many loved ones. We should show them sympathy and respect.

Sometimes the people I'm associated with bother me.
>> No. 12658

I've been hearing this sort of stuff all day too, and I'm so sick of it.

People tell me either that they "don't care, because it's no big deal" or "I think They deserved it, they have killed a lot of people too".

If you don't care, that's fine.
But like you said, you not caring, doesn't mean that it doesn't matter.

But saying it's no big deal, because you are not American, is stupid and shows you clearly not know all the things it have effected (like politics, warfare, our look on terrorism, air safety - and that's all over the world).

And saying people deserved to die, because their country have done bad things - that's like slapping your daughter for something your wife did.
>> US No. 12659
One of my closest friends, who I fell in love with, was rejected by, and moved away, has moved back to town and is now living with my best friend. While we were getting his house ready for her to move in, she and her boyfriend came over to help. Seeing them together was heartbreaking. It has been almost a year, and I still can't get over her.
>> CA No. 12660

Thanks, friends. I'm gonna do some serious thinking about this, talk to him a little more and make up my mind. Even though it won't be easy, breaking our engagement might be best for both of us in this situation.
>> CA No. 12661

What the hell? I'll take "empathy" for $200, Alex. Good job restraining yourself. I'm not even American and I feel for the families who've suffered as a result of 9/11.


Fucking ouch, bro/sis.
>> CA No. 12662
Deal with it. There was another event where lots of people died on a 9/11 before America's but most people don't know about it, for really look up the history of Chile. Only difference is the US were funding those deaths.

I refuse to be butthurt over an event that killed
3000 people when it's used to this day as a justification for hundreds of thousands of civillian deaths since then. America is not a special pitiful snowflake for their 9/11 when most places and people have it much worse.

So screw 9/11 getting attention when people in Mexico are demonstrating to end a 50 year dictatorship. I'd rather look to their future and what that means to North America than on the US's emo whining.

>> CA No. 12663
I can't feel sorry for people I didn't know who died. Now that I do, I do, as I'll feel for anyone killed under violent circumstances where they didn't deserve it (murderers in a police shootout, for example, deserve it).

It does suck that other people died that day, and got no exposure. It sucks that people die every day and get no exposure. Unfortunately, that's how the world is. We can't report on every death ever.

So stop seeing it as a political thing. Yes, the US takes over the world with their shit, but do those people in the towers, or in the pentagon, or in any of the planes deserve that? No. They were mothers, fathers, husbands, wives, CHILDREN. Their deaths should not be glossed over simply because you're pissed that the world obssessed over them collectively.

Forget about the exposure for a moment, and remember that people died that day. PEOPLE. That's who we come together to mourn on that day. No one's stopping you from mourning the deaths of others, so don't try to make us feel bad for mourning them.
>> US No. 12664

It's going to be hard, but if you two aren't compatible, you're not compatible.

Just know that whatever you decide, we're all here for ya.
>> US No. 12665
If you were the one in the relationship that was uncomfortable with sex/not experienced at all/not easily aroused, how would you fix it?
>> CA No. 12666
I think I'd first do some introspective work, to understand why I'm not easily aroused and/or uncomfortable with sex. Is it physical? Psychological? Both? If it's physical, what measures can I take to fix it? Change my diet? See a doctor? If it's psychological, why do I feel this way? Did something happen to me in the past? Is it the way that I was raised? Is there an underlying mental problem, such as anxiety, affecting this?

Then, I'd take whatever measures possible to solve the problem, if it's one that can be solved. Whether that's through discussion of sex with someone experienced, or through therapeutic treatments.

Now, as for experience, there's no way to get experience in sex without having sex. Masturbation helps, but it's like walking to train for a running marathon. Reading erotic and/or sexual education literature can help you get used to certain things, like slang, and general operations of sex, perhaps learn about more advanced things like squirting or anal, so they don't take you completely by surprise should the subject arise.
>> US No. 12667
Thank you. I know I've never been molested or raped, at least. But I did grow up in a household where my parents were very overprotective (and still are), and they checked my computer a lot. I've never had a lot of confidence overall and don't feel sexy. Even as an adult, the idea of looking up sexual terminology or how to play with myself or even porn is sort of scary. But I've been dumped twice because I said no to sex, and I don't want it happening again. I'm embarrassed of myself.
>> CA No. 12668
I never said they deserved it. I said it happens an that worse happens too. It's time to let it drop and move on after 11 years.
>> CA No. 12669
The Holocaust happened 70 years ago. Should we let that go too?
Hell, my grandmother died like 3 months ago. Should I not feel sad she's gone, simply because a certain amount of time has passed?
>> US No. 12670

Ummm, fuck that.

God dammit why do some people think you should just "get over" 9/11. if someone is still grieving over it maybe they lost someone that day. Maybe it deeply affected there life. Maybe they, I don't know, they have a fucking soul and give a shit about other people.

Have some basic friggin' empathy. Putting yourself in someone else's shoes is not that god damn hard.

Also: special snowflake? Really, reallly? You're gonna go there?
>> AU No. 12671
File 134752571067.jpg - (15.77KB , 264x313 , 1259493078792.jpg )
its ironic how long you're dragging out an argument about people needing to get over things
>> US No. 12672
I acknowledge that death happens, both that of complete strangers and of those I know, and I take a moment to reflect on it, but I don't forget, and I don't let the grief take over my life.
>> US No. 12673
So the girl I love finally said she likes me too and we went out on a date and had the most wonderful time of our lives.

Then I woke up.
>> CA No. 12674
Neither do I. Grief hasn't taken over me, but that doesn't mean I can't be saddened when I hear that someone has passed in a tragic way, be it through a terrorist attack, or a car accident, or a fatal disease.
I can't be too deeply affected by 9/11, because no one I knew was directed impacted, but it doesn't mean I can't show respect and sympathy for those that lost someone and are still reeling from it.
My grandfathers both fought in WWII, and thankfully, both came back alive, but we still go up to the square every November 11th, with our poppies on, and lay a wreath for those that weren't so lucky. No one runs around on Remembrance Day telling people to 'get over it'.
>> CA No. 12678
So a friend of mine said that they think they're going to kill themselves very soon, and I'm very upset, to the point of having a panic attack, because they're across the country and I can do virtually nothing.

Just...can I have an e-hug right now?
>> US No. 12679
contact other people they know! maybe one of them can help!
>> CA No. 12680
They're talking to some friends, I guess, on the phone, but I just feel so fucking useless.
>> US No. 12683
Don't! You were there for them when they first told you about their urges, and that's always an important role to play.
>> CA No. 12684
That's the thing, though. It wasn't me they told. Just sort of a general 'hey cyberspace, by the way...' deal.
For the moment, I've been clinging to the statistic that the majority of people who say they're going to do it actually don't end up doing it, but I also know that saying or planning it is one of the first warning signs, so I've been pinging back and forth between 'it's okay they'll be fine- OH GOD OH GOD CAN'T BREATHE CHOKING ON MY OWN PANIC- it's okay it's okay....'

Stressful evening.
>> No. 12685
I'm very sorry for you, I've been through that stuff with one of my friends too. Big hug too you.

I'm not sure if this can help you, but remember when people actually tell others they want to commit suicide, then it's a call for help and mean they are not completely set on doing it yet.

Instead of telling yourself "my friend have told me she wants to commit suicide", try telling yourself "my friend have told me she needs help, because something is bothering her".
I know it sounds silly, but it helps to not thinking of death all the time.
>> CA No. 12686
The latter part is what's killing me. I've been fretting over death for like, six months now. My death, death of my parents, of my friends or loved ones, my cat...
It's unhealthy to worry to this degree, and it bothers me.
>> US No. 12688
I feel guilty whenever good things happen to me.
>> CA No. 12693
I had someone say, "I could snap her neck it's so skinny!" while they had me in a headlock and my first reaction was to think, aww thanks!

I've been working hard to lose weight for the past couple months and even though it really wasn't a compliment it made me feel good. Haha, not remotely pathetic or all.
>> US No. 12697
I ditched my Solly cosplay for the upcoming con. I just can't do it; I'm a nervous wreck around other TF2 cosplayers, and I don't want to spaghetti all over the place like last time.

So there's a bad feel.

On the plus side, however, yesterday was my one-year anniversary with sweetheart, and despite the little rocky times, I genuinely feel like she's the one. I've never been so happy with anyone before.

Also, she said 'duty' last night, and didn't yell at me when I chortled. I'm in love, guys.
>> US No. 12698
This is the second time a relatively religious person has developed a crush on me and tried to convince me that my relationship with my girlfriend is just a phase or something that can be changed, and that I don't need to be afraid of men. I'm not. I've been hurt by both guys and girls equally, in both romantic and in other ways, and I never held it against men, women, or anyone.
>> US No. 12699
Hmmm, time to get my SASSY EMPOWERED LADY on


Congrats on finding true love! I'm happy for you


Honey, this guy is clearly thinking with his dick. Don't take that crap, you've already got someone you care about so him think what he wants. In the end, it's his fault if he ends up disappointed. He knows you're in a relationship.
>> CA No. 12701
While it is true that some people go through a 'bisexual phase' (in reality, it's probably more likely that they're actually bisexual, but due to societal norms, force themselves into either a heterosexual or homosexual role, because it's simpler, for some reason), this guy doesn't get to decide whether it's a phase for you or not. You're with someone, and whether it's a girl or a boy, it's a relationship for you, so he should not be an asshole and try to worm his way in on that.

What a dick.

My feelings today:
HOLY FUCKING CHRIST ON A POPSICLE STICK IT IS GODDAMN COLD. I don't want winter to come so soon! I don't want to wear pants agaaaain.
>> US No. 12702
Wanna trade? It was 106 degrees here the other day and my AC is utter shit.

In other feels. I swear to god, the next time my mother feels the need to point out to my boyfriend and I that "everyone thinks we're just lesbians," I am going to call her out. I've been trying to cut her some slack because she's kind of always been an insensitive bitch that waits for my father to leave the room before saying things like that, but when it starts involving my boyfriend is when I get pissed. I realize we are feminine looking men, mother, thanks a lot.

Made worse by the guy in the Disneyland bathroom yesterday who looked at my boyfriend and I and went, "This is the men's room, right?" No dipshit, those urinals right next to me are for girls.
>> US No. 12703
Thank you. I know that feel, sort of, because I knew I was bisexual at a young age, even before I'd dated for the first time, but I was scared how people would react, so for a time, I dated only guys. I didn't get mad at men when things fell apart, and quite honestly, I've had a lot of problems with girls, too, even though my girlfriend is the only woman I've dated so far. People are just petty and stupid most of the time, and I've been burned so many times by people I fully liked and trusted. People you bear your soul to and they push you away or mock you or call you a liar, y'know? My girlfriend is one of the few who has tried to help me, been patient, given a damn, given tough love, supported me, been one of the few people in my entire life who let me give my side in an argument...I can't not love her. I love her so much.
>> US No. 12705
I feel incredibly frazzled right now. I don't know how to describe it- everything just seems weird today. I'm incredibly anxious I don't know. I feel like I need to give my dad a call. He's always good about these things

In other news, I'm officially a volunteer for a battered woman's shelter! I'm really excited because 1) I can put it on a resume 2) the work is actually pretty fun and 3) I get to help people.
>> US No. 12706
File 134820456782.jpg - (58.23KB , 768x432 , fun_fun_happy_superbig.jpg )
My friend I have had for years and I have liked for quite some time and all my other friends were convinced was having a secret relationship with me finally wants to be in an actual relationship with me. Super happy fun times.
>> CA No. 12708
I am on such a Hunger Games kick lately, and I wanna RP it so bad, but all of the RP groups out there are terribad. Either full of ridiculously-verbose, borderline Mary-Sue making teenagers, or...well, no, that's pretty much all I've found so far. And yuck.

This must be what boys feel like when they get an erection somewhere they cannot jerk off. I have a roleplayrection.
>> US No. 12709
I need to eventually read or watch the series. Currently I know next to nothing about it, though.
>> CA No. 12711
It's about a dystopian society that used to be America, now divided into twelve districts ruled by a central district called The Capitol. The twelve districts, plus an additional thirteenth that was destroyed, once rebelled against the Capitol, and now, as penance, must submit a male and female tribute between the ages of 12 and 18, once a year, to enter an arena wherein they battle to the death against the other tributes from the other districts.
The series follows the life of Katniss Everdeen, a poor girl from District 12, and it's really, really good.

I have a link to the movie online if anyone wants to be a pirate. Arr.
Of course I recommend buying or renting it legally, but I live in Canada where Blockbuster no longer exists, so I do this.
>> CA No. 12714
wait, you don't have a local video store? I have like three in my town...
>> US No. 12715
Video stores are dying dude

You must live in a magical part of canada where blockbuster is actually profitable
>> CA No. 12716
Nope. We had Rogers here at one point, like ten years ago, but Blockbuster put them out of business. Ironic.
Only place we have to get videos around here are in a few select gas stations, unless you want to buy vids at Future Shop or something.

Keeping in mind you're from, where, stubs? Ontario? I'm from New Brunswick. We're a loooot smaller. Teehee.
>> US No. 12718
I'd rather rent it, but I think I might have to pirate this one (or catch it on Livestream), as much as I'd hate to. I'm in a dorm right now, and we're not allowed to have cars. Everything around us is only accessible by car.
>> CA No. 12720

Anon from above with the fiance who isn't into sex. I broke up with him today. Have to move half way across the country to live with my mum for a bit.

Fuck man, this breakup is the worst. Totally the worst. I'm sleeping in the guest bed and he isn't speaking to me. Gonna get some boxes and get out of here ASAP.

It hurts, cos I love him so much. But this isn't going to work, and I'm doing what's best for both of us.
>> CA No. 12721
My life has very suddenly become that damn Gotye song, fuck it.
>> AU No. 12722
>> CA No. 12723
We don't have Blockbuster. We have privately owned video stores, but they're strictly video stores, not gas stations/corner stores.
Yeah, last time I was back home (Newfoundland) the only video store in town was the back corner in a combination grocery/lottery/pharmacy/hardware store.
>> US No. 12724
Any way you can reconcile or make it so sex is less important? If you love him, why let him go?
>> US No. 12725
Okay, that was stupid, forget it.
>> US No. 12726
File 134862883098.gif - (471.92KB , 450x253 , come here.gif )
Wow, I am so sorry about that... I can't even imagine how you must feel...
>> US No. 12727
Personally, I agree with this sentiment, but maybe that's because I don't care for sex and my fiance didn't leave me over it. We worked it out so that it was fair for both of our needs/lack thereof because sex was not the most important part of our relationship.

On another topic, I'm starting to hate being around people, especially loud, outgoing people (like my current Community Advisor) who act like five year olds and MUST have attention. I wish I could just live in my dorm and NOT be expected to interact with people.
>> CA No. 12728

Okay, that Gotye song is way better than the one I was thinking of. Thank you.


Thanks everyone, for the support. Things have changed significantly since last night. I packed up all of my stuff, was all set to get my last hug when he said "We can't give this up. There's no way I can give you up. You're going to move back home, figure things out, and we're going to be okay."

So. Maybe I'm not giving up quite yet. There's a lot more going on for me than just the sex, things that aren't related to my bf, but it's way easier to focus on that as a reason to leave.

I'm gonna go back, live with my mum for a bit, get an apartment and live independently for a while. Then he'll come out to visit and we'll see what happens.

I feel so much better than I did last night.
>> CA No. 12729

That's rough, I'm sorry that they're giving you trouble. It'd be really nice if everyone would act like adults.
>> US No. 12730
File 134863220975.gif - (66.08KB , 360x360 , tumblr_ls94xzXIyt1qdeyqk.gif )
Good for you! And good luck, okay?
>> US No. 12731
I don't know you, but I'll gladly say I'm proud of you for working on this.

Same Anon from 12727: Yes, I wish they would too. Too bad that's not how this part of life works, except in class. I'm starting to wonder if there's something seriously wrong with me. At least my fiance can fake being nice to people; I'm getting to the point where I'm terse as much as possible and quiet the rest of the time. Otherwise, I'm anxious and tensea.
>> US No. 12732
File 13487667438.gif - (488.08KB , 500x281 , tumblr_lna33xsNED1qcgqu9o1_500.gif )
Sick as all fucking hell for the past three days. May get dropped from both of my campus classes for missing so many days. Of course, I get horrendously sick after playing hooky for one day, so I guess this is karma. Although karma is kind of a huge bitch if I'm coughing near constantly, vomiting and passing out just because I skipped class for a day.

There's also a pretty good chance I'm going to have to pick my boyfriend up from LA in a few hours. I'm really praying our friend will take him home but I'm really not holding my breath.

I just hope I don't pass out again.
>> US No. 12733
are we twins
this sounds almost exactly the same as my situation
well, sans vomiting. But I actually think vomiting would help
i just don't want to
>> US No. 12734
Trying to get ready for the con.

Morgan's fucking man-child boyfriend HADN'T PACKED SHIT.

We were supposed to leave at 6.

It's 8:30, and he's playing with his costumes.

>> GB No. 12735
Why did this rattle my cage? Get him fuckin telt! A good click across the ear and a trainer up the bum is called for I say.
>> US No. 12736
Need some advice.

Two people I deeply liked and respected were pretty blunt to me recently and revealed they never really liked me. Now I get anxious stomach cramps and my heart starts pounding and I feel nauseous whenever I go on Facebook and Tumblr, I've withdrawn for the most part in real life, and I hate myself for being scared of people in general (or really, more scared that I can't be a helpful, useful, interesting friend) when it's most likely just a handful of assholes who feel this way.
>> US No. 12737
Apart from experiencing similar experiences, what advice are you looking for?
>> CA No. 12738
I hate it when people do this. HATE IT. One of the big cons I go to every year comes with three hotel roomies who can't get their shit together and are always late. This past year I had to get to the con super early, wait to go meet a cosplay partner, and then they're texting me and calling med to get me to come let them into the hotel room and it's like... if you'd been here when I got here, liked you were supposed to be, we wouldn't have this problem! And then I spent maybe 10% of the con with them cause they were super fucking boring.
My ranty story aside, I know that feel bro. Hope your con rocks and I certainly don't envy your situation with your gal. I get so jealous, I don't know how you do it.
>> US No. 12740

So, everything's going well, until another girl we're rooming with starts crying in the middle of the con.

"What's wrong?"


...Wat. Way to not let anyone have fun, yo.

But hey, we're here, and I'm rocking my God-awful costume.
>> US No. 12741
Ugh I'm sorry man, I wouldn't wish this shit on anyone.
Went to my school's free clinic (fuck yeah college benefits) to find I have some sort of weird viral bronchitis or something. They didn't give me antibiotics because apparently the strain I have would just get stronger, so they gave me cough syrup, cough drops, nasal spray and a much needed inhaler. But oh my god, this cough syrup. It is seriously the WORST fucking thing I have ever put in my mouth. It's acid green and it makes me long for the cherry shit.

Feeling a little better, though. I just really pray I don't get dropped from my life drawing class. My teacher said he'd "consider" not dropping me with a doctor's note. Sign.

My mom is coming over to bring me soup and fruit and juice but I know all she's really going to do is bitch about how messy my apartment is. She wants to know why my boyfriend hasn't cleaned up and I'm like, uh, maybe it's because he's been taking care of me, himself, and our four pets on top of trying to make his own appointments and things without a car? Her response was just "Oh come on, there has to be a couple of minutes in there to wash a dish or clean the toilet! :)" Condescending smiley faces are her specialty. Ugh.
>> US No. 12742
If it is viral, you don't want antibiotics anyway. Antibiotics are ONLY effective against bacterial infections. If a doctor EVER gives you antibiotics for a virus, call bullshit.

Barring that, hope you feel better soon.
>> US No. 12743
Yeah, I figure that's why they didn't. I was about to pass out from dizziness when they were talking to me so I don't exactly remember all the details.

My mom bitched about how messy the apartment is like I expected. On the upside, she brought me soup and juice and peaches and DAMN this soup is good.
>> DE No. 12744
Okay i need a place to let it out first of all. I am not scruffy if i go to a fucking interview. I wear a clean not weared out jeans, a blouse and clean shoes also my jacket is a wonderfull leather jacket which is classy and great. (My job is more creative so business class outfit isn´t the first choice in there) I see others go with their sweater to the same interview and they still get the fucking place! Does it mean i look scruffy just because i don´t put on make up for it like i did on my picture? Well gues what i can´t for the love of the gods wear everyday make up, because my skin is highly allergic to it and everytime i put it on i need to scrub my face clean and i can wait days until my skin regenerated. I thought it matters how my skills are not if i wear fucking make up to a rather good outfit! Also i am not STUPID. If someone is sitting there and repeating himself 3 times what they expect do they think i need to ask again the SAME question? I have internet i informed myself about your firm. I know what you do and you told me. WOULDN`T IT SHOW HOW INCOMPETENT I AM BY ASKING YOU THE SAME FUCKING QUESTION AGAIN AND AGAIN? You told me about your times when you open, who works with me, what you do. for the love of god what else should i know? I mean i know i don´t get paid so every payment questions die. Also. I fuckign smile the whole time and do like i interest myself in it. But if someone is standing there like he is highly annoyed by showing me this firm... SORRY THAT I DON`T GET THAT EXCITED ABOUT IT ALL! Just to let it out. The world can go screw itself if it matters that i can wear a clean good outfit but still need to wear make up to get a internship, just because i am female. Fuck you world.
>> US No. 12745
I guess I'm just curious on what to do next. I don't want to be afraid of people or scared that everyone just barely tolerates me. I want to be able to go online and talk to people and not be tempted to delete my entire account because I'm scared someone will attack me viciously if I say something stupid.
>> US No. 12746
Honestly, it doesn't sound like it's you, but them. Some people are just assholes, especially toward people who they know or can figure out don't have a lot of self-esteem. Like I said in an earlier post, I've experienced the same garbage from people who I called friends/good acquaintances and I left to find greener pastures. It's hard, of course, but it's better than suffering their cruelty ever was.
>> US No. 12747
Are you sure you "looking scruffy" is why you did not get hired? There are loads of possible reasons.
>> DE No. 12748
Dude this was what i got said in the mail to me. I looked scruffy and particular uninterested. Now i need to say in one interview i was not interested much, because it was a small firm where they let the products print in a different town and i didn´t think it would help me much to learn something in my internship. Not having much practical work experience i can understand. Not maybe bringing the knowledge i can understand. But fuck them if they call me scruffy. This is not constructive this is just insulting.
Maybe i need to bite into the sour apple and put on make up and fuck this world for forcing me to do this.
>> US No. 12750
Though the thought sucks, I refuse to work for any place that expects me to wear make up just because I'm of the female sex. The only places that should expect that are modeling agencies or, possibly, places where customers/patrons will be seeing you a lot. Certainly not in office work or lab work. Make up sucks ass.
>> No. 12751
Friend of a friend is getting suicidal. I've barely talked to her and I don't know what's going on but holy fuck this is stressful. I just have to hope somebody stops her, helpless to do anything about it myself.
>> CA No. 12752
Cried over nothing to my man today. Feel like the stupidest girlfriend.
>> US No. 12753
Surely he does not think you are stupid.
>> US No. 12754
It's just that the accusations came out of nowhere, and I've always thought everything was my fault and I fucked up on everything that I touch, so I can't...I can't fathom it being anyone's fault but my own. Especially since they were so nice to me before. I think I put everyone but myself on a pedestal that I tell myself I could never hope to reach.
>> US No. 12755
I know that feeling too, but the fact of the matter is that not everything can be any one person's fault and some people do suddenly turn face and become dicks. I've experienced that enough times in my life that I'm done trying to befriend people.
>> US No. 12757
File 13492224068.jpg - (58.79KB , 875x657 , DerSnuggletooth.jpg )
So after many days of drydocking, antibiotic shots, and draining of the infection site, my little baby is all better! Also, she's fucking huge since I last posted a picture.
>> BR No. 12758

I'm so happy for you both... <3

Its so good that you didn't give up, nor did the little one.

Good luck to your love, your pet and to you.
>> US No. 12759
Someone at my college is claiming I hit their car in the parking lot, which I'm pretty sure I would know if I did. Which I did not. They claim they have "witnesses" (none of which said anything to me), they didn't call the cops, didn't leave me a note, and only took down my car information and told campus safety. I don't even think they have my phone number. My insurance agent told me not to do anything unless I hear from them, which I haven't (I don't think - I've gotten some random calls which haven't left a voicemail, and as far as I'm concerned, if they don't leave a voicemail it's not that important). There's no damage to my car that wasn't already there, so even if I hear from them, it's not like they're getting anything from me. I just don't understand where the fuck this came from.
>> CA No. 12760
Some bitch tried to accuse my friend of hitting her van with her car in the campus parking lot.

Best part?

My friend doesn't have a car.

I'm no help, I thought it just might give you a chuckle.

Watching the debate. Ohhhh Mittens, you are so full of shit. Stop talking over the mediator dude. What did he ever do to you?
>> US No. 12761
Hey, hey iz hey iz lookit here looke this is great

I have a hilarious joke for you

Mitt Romney.

BWAHAHAHAHA it's funny because he sucks!
>> CA No. 12762
Okay so that was like fuckin three months ago. Now I'm down 15 pounds and totally in the clear for a healthy weight range.
Today my belt was too loose. I had to hold up my pants as I walked to my classes. It was sweet baggy victory.
>> CA No. 12763
Dohoho, that slaps me on the knee.
>> US No. 12764
I feel like sometimes the world is a reverse version of The X-Men where I'm the only one who doesn't have superpowers, but people expect me to have them.

"Why don't you have the same amount of knowledge as a middle-aged professor with a PhD? Why don't you have the same level of art skills as someone who's been working in the industry for 25 years?"

"Why can't you read my mind about what I want you to do?"

"Why are you being nice to me? I don't want you hitting on me! Ew! You're not even attractive."

When did niceness and openness equal flirtation? But gee, thanks for reaffirming my insecurities.
>> DK No. 12765
All I ever wanted, since I was a kid, was to get a job where I could somehow work with storytelling (movies, comics, art ect) or be a doctor.

But there have been so many problems in my life keeping me from achieving those dreams.
I feel like it's a bad circle.

I don't have any money to pay for any kind of education.
I have a lot of medical problems that keeps me from getting a good job and earning any real money.

I feel stuck in life, unable to do the things I want to do. Whenever things go right, then I get sick and end up in the hospital again.

I just wish life was so much different.
>> US No. 12766

So it turns out the owner of the car isn't even claiming that I hit them. He doesn't have any damage, I don't have any damage, campus safety took pictures of prior damage on both cars, and the only person claiming I hit someone is some crazy unidentified lady. I talked to the "officer" on campus and she got all bitchy about how I admitted to committing misdemeanor hit and run, and when I told her I, A. Didn't hit anyone and B. Didn't admit shit, she said, "Oh... you didn't talk to an older lady...?" Yes, I just talked to some random woman and admitted to hitting a car and not doing anything about it. That makes some real fucking sense.
The only sense I can make of her claiming I hit someone is that she doesn't like my equal rights bumperstickers or something. Or she's just a loony.

I had such a shitty day yesterday and all I wanted to do was pig out on some wings from wing street. They get delivered and they bring me boneless ones instead of traditional, which I can't eat because they're heavily breaded. I call them and they're like "uh we'll send you more but you have to pay again....." Argh. Just ended up giving them to my boyfriend and making myself some pizza.
>> US No. 12768
You have my sympathy, I've been feeling the same way recently myself. Been an avid video gamer since I was 2 and my grandfather played with me on an Atari, and I've always wanted to get a job working with video games in some way, eventually leading to where I am now: All but going insane over trying to balance personal life, internet fun, college schedules, out-of-class work, keeping in contact with friends/family, etc.

I just feel like there isn't enough time for things. Every day it seems like more things come up that I need or want or have to do, and I never have enough time to get things done, and this madness has been been piling up a ton of shit for weeks now to the point where I don't even want to DO anything productive anymore, even wanting to just drop out and give up on my dreams because of the very high probability that even after graduating, I wouldn't be able to get a job in a field I'd enjoy, due to the enormous competition from other schools, other states, other countries and their immigrants, or jobs being outsourced.

To top it all off, despite being completely sure that I wanted to work with 3d modelling and such for the past five years that I've been working on it (to the point where I refused to go to a regular college in favour of the one I'm in now, specializing in the Game Design and Development courses), now I no longer find any of it fun, more of a hassle with all the stupid little things I have to deal with like forgetting to key an animation bit, having to manually weld hundreds of vertexes, searching a model with potentially TENS OF THOUSANDS OF FACES for a couple of flipped normals that happen for no apparent fucking reason, and more shit that I can't even recall properly at this time. Even worse, in spite of all this shit that I've been dealing with and not liking, I honestly can't see myself doing anything else. I have no damn clue what other job I'd be capable of doing and also have any interest in, and my mind always goes back to thinking of being a boring no-name office worker in a generic cubicle, and how that would likely be a better job in terms of pay and job security, rather than being an artist working for a company for a few months, then getting let go when the project completes and having to find another job on my own.

I feel stuck in life, unable to do the things I wanted to do because they are no longer what I want to do, far harder than what I expected, and I don't see any other way to go from here. I wish 12th grade had never ended, where everything was easy, fun, and I had familiar faces to see with fun things to do every day. Everything has turned into a pile of shit since I entered college, and I don't see a way out of it.
>> US No. 12769
Congrats! I've had trouble losing weight for years.
>> US No. 12770
I've come to think niceness is overrated. I've been nice my whole life and people are always assholes. I gave it up.
>> US No. 12771
Out of curiosity and possibly stupidity, I clicked the "mens rights" tag on tumblr...

I have never been to a darker place.

in all honesty though, it actually really bothered me and I have no idea what to think.

>> US No. 12772
I don't think I've ever been to a darker place than Tumblr in general. I actually do believe in men's rights (as well as women's rights, of course, because you know, I believe in rights for everyone) and just... eugh. I would not dare to wander into that tag.

On a side note, I start hormone therapy in about three weeks. So excite. Also meeting with a councilor at my school about the fact that I cannot get anyone to refer to me by the correct gender literally ever no matter how many times I mark "male" on sheets or correct people.
>> US No. 12773
Nice people do exist, just be patient. It can be torture, but when you find someone right, it's the greatest thing.

Tumblr is okay if you avoid the politics entirely. I'm with you on men's rights, though-- everything should be equal. Congrats on the T!
>> CA No. 12774
Happy Thanksgiving to all you crazy canucks out there!
>> US No. 12775
I think 20+ years of patience is long enough.
>> CA No. 12776
Same to you!

Yesterday, we walked by homeless man on the way to the market, and he asked for change. Now, I'm schooled not to make eye contact with the panhandlers, because there have been incidents of people being attacked.
But this guy, when I walked past, wished me a Happy Thanksgiving.
Something about it just broke my heart. So I spent twenty minutes after my lunch, looking for a sandwich I could give him, but in the end didn't find anything, so I just dug up whatever change I could find in the bottom of my purse.
When I got back he was already gone.
So sad.

But we baked pumpkin pies, and took them up to the soup kitchen for their Thanksgiving dinner, along with soup, and some boxes of dressing and stuff. Felt good to give. And a guy came in right after us with a HUGE freaking turkey, and a big bag of potatoes.

So, I dunno. I feel bad about the panhandler, even knowing he'd probably just spend the money on booze, but I feel good about the soup kitchen.

So yeah. Happy Canadian Thanksgiving.
>> AU No. 12777
I think i might be addicted to Video Games, i spent all day yesterday playing TF2 for 3 hours..... Do you guys think im over reacting or is it fine for a weekend?
Also that happy feeling when you get that Pyro misc you wanted :)
>> US No. 12779
Friend, if you think that 3 hours of gameplay is "all day" then you have never tasted addiction to games. 3 hours used to be more like a minimum for any game of mine that wasn't meant to be picked up and played every now and then, and I've easily had days where I played for 6-8 hours in a sitting, given breaks for food/drink/etc during that timespan. Granted, I don't really have that much time to spare at once anymore save for when I put some effort into making it, but it does still happen every now and then. You're overreacting a bit, and congratulations on your Pyro Misc!
>> DK No. 12780

Also - addiction is defied as something that destroys or interrupt your normal everyday life.

People that are strongly addicted to games can spend days, without sleep, in front of the screen, and doesn't think about work, friend or family.
I doubt you're that bad off :)
>> DK No. 12781
I not sure why this annoys me so much, but it does.

I have met a lot of people lately, who does stupid shit and argue it with "I'm not afraid to die" (and I'm not talking YOLO shit)

I'm fine with people not being afraid of death, but I feel people don't value their lives enough, if they don't care about dying.

Also, it's always people who have lived a carefree life, and have never felt true pain, that tells me that kind of shit.

Untill you have felt what's it's like to almost die from starvation
or you have been in hours of pain becurse your intestines have been busted
or your leg have been blown off, or some shit like that.

Until you have experienced something as painful as that, then don't come telling me that dying isn't painful and shouldn't be feared.

I think that people, who doesn't fear death, have never experienced the kind of pain, that really makes life worth living - if they had, then they would value each living day, and not put them self in risk of dying.
>> CA No. 12782
Had a great Thanksgiving weekend with my family and my friends and my boyfriend. Now I've got a whole week off from university, and I'm reminded of how shitty life is with dial up internet...
Also I think I might be in emotional shock or something. Like it usually takes a day or so for the boyfriend-went-back-home depression to set in, but this time I really want it to just slowly progress to that point instead of kind of hitting me all at once like it usually does. We had a great weekend together, but I get really really down when we're apart. Like my family and friends worry about my mental state and stuff.
Any advice on how to deal with being lonely and depressed? With the distance and my school and his work, it really isn't possible for us to see eachother more than we do, but if anyone has any tips on how to distract yourself and keep busy, I'm open to hearing them.
>> US No. 12785
File 134975609637.jpg - (58.83KB , 866x646 , Spoiler Picture.jpg )
So, fuck people. Like, seriously, fucking FUCK people.

Someone dumped this bitsy baby kitten off at Ingles, where I work, about 3 hours before I clocked out.

He had this huge matted wound with an open spot on the side of his neck.


I pulled that sucker out, and it was one FUCKING CENTIMETER in diameter.

How the FUCK do you let your PET get to that point?!

I washed the wound out after I pulled the worm out, and he's perked up already. I also gave him an oral antibiotic.

Pic spoliered because that's a pic of the wound. I shaved around it before I examined it. That hole you see there? The worm was three times as wide around as that.
>> US No. 12786

What the actual fuck

What kind of conditions must you live in to let your cat get that bad, I mean really ew. just, ew
>> DK No. 12787
How do you know it's a pet? It might be a stray, that someone have found on the street like that
>> US No. 12788
File 134978473033.jpg - (41.55KB , 600x460 , MickyJ.jpg )

Because the odds of someone finding a stray and picking it up just to drive it to a grocery store and drop it off are slim to none. He's also too affectionate and, oddly enough, clean.

That was the weird thing. When I bathed him, I noticed that he had no fleas to speak of. Giant maggot? Sure! Fleas? No.

And the worst part about the maggot site isn't what you're seeing in the picture. It's the smell.

Anyways, we all noticed that he had an 'M' pattern on his forehead, and in our family, there's a rule that any tabby with an 'M' has to be named something starting with 'M.'

I wanted to name him Mick, but Barbara wanted to name him Mr. Stockings.

So we compromised.

Everyone, I want you to meet Michael J. Socks.
>> CA No. 12789
I'd find yourself a project to work on. Maybe learn to knit, or practice painting, or something like that.

That. Is The. Most. Precious. Name.
>> US No. 12790
File 134981724738.jpg - (45.30KB , 697x522 , sleepybaby.jpg )

I'm glad you like it.

Pic related; that dark mass on the side of his face is the wound. It's already looking better, now that I've washed it out.
>> US No. 12791
I say live and let live. Why bother trying to change their perspective?
>> US No. 12793
File 13498409184.png - (341.33KB , 500x281 , benedictpls.png )
>>someone I used to talk to goes to several out-of-state cons each year, cosplays at all of them, and has spending money left over
>>mention I can go to maybe one day of one local con this year, but won't have any money for cosplay
>>"oh my god, you selfish spoiled bitch, always whining and trying to get mommy and daddy to buy you everything, I'm not talking to you anymore"
>> US No. 12794
Oh hypocrites... if that's the right word.
>> US No. 12795

The actual fuck? Dear God, how dare you not have money to blow on costumes.
>> US No. 12797
I've been working at the same place as my father for a few months, fixing their atrocious database. I was sick on monday, and when Dad came home, he said the boss had found 3 issues (out of the over 1,000 I have fixed), which means that I am not doing my job and he wants his money back.
I had tuesday off for school, but today I was finally able to check the "issues" he found, they were the result of some strange quirk in the search function in the website, which is beyond what I am supposed to be working on, completely out of my control, and has existed since before I started working there, so the boss has retracted his complaint. It's good to know I did not screw up, but the boss's eagerness to blame me for something he should have known about for quite some time is disconcerting.
>> GB No. 12799
So today I told my ex in no uncertain terms that I don't think we should be talking any more because despite me trying to be a nice person to her, she constantly seems like she just does not care and has no interest in me, and thus removed her from FB.

The reply was that she owes me nothing and I need to learn to move on. So to her I guess saying hello to her every now and then constitutes still having feelings.


Also, I feel achy. Who's got a hug?
>> US No. 12800
File 134996171598.gif - (487.91KB , 300x200 , ohgodhumanhug.gif )

Well that's no fair...

I'll hug ya.
>> CA No. 12801
I have ALL of the hugs, Donny.


You're too good for her anyway.
>> US No. 12803
Her logic was that she has a job and I'm still supported by my parents, so she'd decided that my parents regularly spoiled me with presents and stuff. They don't. I get a little money to use for textbooks and groceries and stuff, but I can't really go to restaurants or Starbuck's or buy myself comics very often, if at all, and my parents don't make as much money as she claims they do. I've been trying to negotiate for a job, but my parents don't seem to have confidence in me being able to get or hold one.

*hugs* You're a good guy, and you deserve better than her. Exes are weird-- they say they want to remain friends, but if you try to talk to them after you've broken up, any attempt at communication is interpreted as flirting, even when it's not. I find when people say "you need to get over me", it really means "I need to get over you." Best of luck, Donny. Just stay away from her for now.
>> GB No. 12808
Cheers for the love, needed that. As for staying away from her, pretty much deleted and erased her from everything I have so yus, ain't much choice there.
>> US No. 12810
So, I'm having an argument with a group of people who honest-to God believe that that Holocaust was not as bad as what happens to pigs, chickens, and cows.

My great-grandparents have serial wrist tattoos from concentration camps. To have them compared to pigs is sickening.

What do...
>> US No. 12811

Put them in a concentration camp for several months. Then slaughter them and make them into hamburgers. Let their ghosts choose what was worse.

...But seriously, I don't think you can cure chronic stupidity.
>> US No. 12812
Apparently posting on a YouTube video that gay/gender equality isn't going to happen overnight is a big no-no. God forbid anyone be realistic about it.
>> US No. 12813

I'm not a violent person, but shit. You'd think people would have a little more respect for fellow people than a fucking CHICKEN. I mean, I don't think animals in the meat industry need to live in bad conditions, or be killed slowly, but these are my family those assholes are talking about.


Nah, it's won't happen overnight. Buuuuut. It's slowly getting there. It's just gonna take work.

I, personally, am waiting anxiously for gay marriage to happen. I have something to ask Sweetheart.
>> US No. 12814
I'm at the hospital right now.

Grandpa's abdominal wall burst.
>> CA No. 12815
Jesus, that's terrible. For whatever it's worth, I'll keep him and you in my thoughts and prayers. Best wishes. *hug*
>> US No. 12818
Best wishes, Kit. I know a lot of shit's gone down and I really hope it turns around for you. You deserve so much better.

I agree with you as well-- while none of my relatives were in the Holocaust, I've always refused to compare anything's horrible-ness to it out of respect, I think it's honestly degrading to do so.
>> US No. 12819

So, he's out of surgery. It turns out his hernia had strangulated some of his intestine and it had died. They had to remove about a foot and a half. They aren't sure if he's going to make it.

We're all contacting everyone we can right now.

Thank you for all your well-wishes.

I'll keep everyone posted.
>> BR No. 12820

Good luck for you, for your grandpa and for your family...

Best wishes.
>> GB No. 12821
Hope to hear from you soon with good news lass. The very best to you and your family.
>> US No. 12823

So, he's in the ICU, because they can't close the surgery wound up yet; his remaining intestines are so swollen that they can't pulls the skin over them to close them up.

His kidneys have also started to fail. They can't figure out why.

Thanks for all your support, guys. I love you all.
>> US No. 12825
One of the best teachers I ever had said that when you are still young, most companies aren't going to expect much from you anyway, so a degree is less important until you are older, so it is alright to focus more on work than school. That way you will get experience for later jobs, and be able to pay for classes without having to get loans.
>> CA No. 12826
Colds suck. That is all.
>> CA No. 12827
Played Slender for a bit with roomies, looks like I won't be sleeping tonight.
>> AU No. 12828
i see a lot of maple leafs here so it might be a good place to ask

over the years i've seen bushfires, tsunamis, earthquakes, terroism, riots, wars and y'know, that all that disaster level shit happen all over the world

but i cant think of a single thing in that has happened to Canadia that would be worthy of national mourning

so enlighten me, what do you guys have to "nevar forget"?

totally not be related to something further up the thread
>> US No. 12829
Well, there was the great maple syrup shortage of '95. Pure panic.
>> CA No. 12830
And let's not forget the great toque famine of '86.
>> AU No. 12832
im sure the Kroeger/Lavine wedding will be a day that lives in infamy
>> GB No. 12833
File 135058046764.png - (70.41KB , 980x750 , 2012-08-02-0399-shiver.png )
So as many of you may know by now, TR was in a car accident, and whilst she is ok, that doesn't stop me from FREAKING THE FUCK OUT! Holy crap, I got the shakes for a bit last night just thinking about it.
>> CA No. 12835
Not mourning, but the 2012 Winter Olympics were big. Canadians and hockey. People were outside holding, "Honk, Canada won!" signs.
>> US No. 12836

I had no idea. Thank God TR's alright!

So, there's this woman that comes into work. She looks almost exactly like Sweetheart (but Sweetheart is, and will always be, more beautiful than any woman I'll ever see).

But still, she looks eerily similar to her.

She smiles at me every time she sees me, and calls me by name, and it makes my heart hurt.

I'm literally on the verge of tears every time she looks at me.

I just miss Sweetheart so much..

I suck. Weeeh.
>> US No. 12838
Nothing says "happy be-lated birthday" like getting into a minor car accident when a stupid dog clearly on a suicide mission and takes out the grill section of the front bumper about two hours ago in a section of empty dark highway. Thank goodness me and my sis weren't hurt but really messed up my good feels mood for today after spending it with my Dad since Friday was my birthday and hung out with my Mom. It's going into the shop on Tuesday and the insurance is covering all but a $100 deductible which isn't too bad.

Ironic part about this is back in March of this year, my mom had an accident on her birthday driving home from dinner when a deer ran out in front of her Jeep SUV. So it's official: 2012 is the year of animal collisions on your birthday, at least, in this household.
>> US No. 12839
Every house, apartment, or dorm I've lived in, there's been one really obnoxious person. The person that doesn't understand why someone might have an issue with them blaring loud music and/or screaming and/or slamming doors at 2 am. Is it worth complaining about this? Last semester in college, these girls were being insanely loud on a regular basis, they refused to turn down their music (and laughed at me to my face about it, because they thought my request was idiotic and they had the right to do whatever they want whenever they wanted it) and ended up threatening to get into a fistfight with a friend who stood up in my defense over it. Generally when someone's being shitty to me, it always backfires to complain about it. I'm getting cynical.
>> US No. 12840
Waking up at five in the morning for a seven-hour shift? Me-no-mother-fucking-gusta.

But at least covering this shift has put me WELL over 40 hours. I'm covering an eight-hour shift at about $12 an hour, thanks to this.

I just wish I wasn't so TIRED...
>> US No. 12842
Told everyone my views in English on humanity in general and how we couldn't actually destroy the earth and nature even if we tried. (Our grade is 40% participation, otherwise I wouldn't talk at all). Got told my idea was "bullshit."

...I thought college was supposed to be socially better than high school, guys.
>> US No. 12843
Joke's on you. In my experience, college is just like high school, but with older students.

Did you at least explain why you think the earth and nature couldn't possibly be destroyed by us? Because it's been theorized that if we detonated every single nuclear warhead at once, we could destroy the planet. Even one warhead is enough to kill off the majority of living things in a given area. They'd come back, sure, but we do have the power to do it.
>> US No. 12844

Well fuck.

Yeah, I did explain my reasoning. I have the idea that the earth survived the formation of the moon--it can definitely survive anything we do to it. (Unless, of course, we find a way to completely fracture the planet and spread those pieces far apart enough from one another in space so that they aren't all pulled back together again, which I don't think even every nuclear warhead could do, but I could be wrong.)

Also, I was speaking in literal "destroy the Earth" terms (as mentioned above). I know that we could kill off a lot of the natural life if we so desired, but it would simply make earth uninhabitable for us, so we would die (or leave) and then plants and animals would probably make their way back. It would just take a while. (annnd they'd probably be pretty fucked up from all that radiation)

(Anyway this is just my opinion that I'm trying to elaborate on please don't take it seriously I don't want an internet argument that's the worst kind.)
>> US No. 12845
I'm being slurred for being gay, all because I'm trying to defend an old teacher of mine from some serious bullshit.

Gonna kill a motherfucker over here.
>> US No. 12846
Sigh. The first day in like two weeks that I get to sleep in, and my cat decides to be the biggest, loudest asshole he can possibly be at 8am. Oh well.

On the bright side - testosterone in two weeks!
>> US No. 12848

Congrats on the treatments!

I hope it goes well for you. :)
>> US No. 12850
I wasn't trying to argue, just trying to figure where you were coming from - as in, whether or not you'd justified the comment. I had a bible study class kind of like that, where anything a person said that didn't agree with god or questioned the bible, was attacked by almost everyone else. It made class participation painful.

Even a hypothetical concept should be given a chance in discussion.
>> CA No. 12851
"punish me for griefing" on a goddamn friend-run minecraft server? I made fucking CHICKEN TRAPS. It just pissed me off. I told them to "kiss my ass shit lords". They made a jail, "escorted me" to the trial room, for making CHICKEN TRAPS.

God fuck their beurocracy and sense of self entitlement. It is not only humiliating, it is insulting and I won't fucking take it from a bunch of self rightous people I will never meet.
>> US No. 12852
Some people take gaming way too seriously, especially TF2, L4D, and Minecraft. I don't know why. Maybe these people are too damn serious over everything in their lives, I dunno. But don't let it get you down.
>> US No. 12854
chicken trap? like the water thing you use to harvest eggs?
are they serious i don't even.
>> AU No. 12855
what was so special about the server that you couldn't just leave?

hey, i once crashed a server with a chicken farm. they can be quite dangerous

>come ghtsumm
hail to the king baby
>> US No. 12856
Theres this girl, my best friend. We dated when we were 16 and I was stupid and scared and had sexuality issues. Let's just make this long story short and say I broke her heart.

We are now both 20, grown women. I've suffered anxiety and I miss her. When we dated we were stupid girls. She was over obsessive, and I was pretty much asexual at the time. We've been through a lot together.

I asked her if she still loves ne and she said she doesn't know. I asked if she was over me and she said " I wish I was. But I probably never will be. " and then I asked if shed ever take me back. She said only if I see a psychologist MAYBE. I am seeing one next week, but i need more to tell her.

Should I convince my first girl to try again withme? As adults? Or should I get over my highschool heartbreak and move on? can some one give me advice On these options
>> US No. 12858
I say, if you're both still willing, why not? My only advice is: wait until you've gone to several sessions with the psychologist and don't try to force the relationship if it turns out not to work.
>> CA No. 12859
They said, "If you exit the server it'll count as running and you'll be banned" so I stayed.

Also, chicken trap as in, place chickens in a hole underground, place tnt block on top. When the tnt block is broken chickens pour out.
>> US No. 12860
That sounds more like silly pranking then greifing,geez. unless the person touching the tnt thing decides to set it off on purpose,but that isn't your butt.
Kinda like the time I put a swamp in hydra's blimp. didn't damage anything,removable, and quite silly.(he ended up liking it and keeping it.:V)
Also Kumori used to flood people's houses with chickens anyway. then again, it's free KFC if you wanna get rid of 'em.
>> US No. 12862
I really am bad with words, I just want us to work it out. What should I say to her to let her know I feel bad for what I did? She's not talking to me until Monday so I'm nervous...
>> US No. 12864
Well what did you do, and why?
>> US No. 12865
See >>12856 (they used the same Name).
>> US No. 12866
Be honest. Honesty is the best policy by most people's standards, though sometimes they don't want to hear the truth. It sounds like you two still have something and are both willing to, at the very least, try.
>> US No. 12867
I think I gained a persecution complex as a kid and it never really left, because I always have this lingering feeling of "no matter how quiet and inconspicuous I want to be, people will always drag me out into the open and scrutinize me for the tiniest fault or how-dare-nice-things-happen-to-you-for-once-they-should-happen-to-me-instead" and it makes me nauseous and scared to the point where I can't trust people and I keep losing my temper if anyone does it. This needs to stop, it's ridiculous.
>> US No. 12868
Damn straight it needs to stop. No one ought to be saying things like that to you. Call bullshit, even it's scary.
>> US No. 12869
Well I've suffered anxiety for years and it really messed up our relationship. I'm scared she won't trust me. I try to tell her EVERYTHING but she snaps at me a lot fir saying the same thing everyday. I just wish I could make her understand. Ii love her so much, and I'm scared I'm losing her.
>> US No. 12870
Don't force it, that's all I can really say. If she's not ready/willing to work with you, then that's it.
>> US No. 12872
File 135165223937.gif - (464.33KB , 500x338 , wellthisisdepressing.gif )
Sweetheart blew me off to spend time with her ex again.

The more I think about it, the more depressed I get.

>> CA No. 12883
Once again, I hastily apply dark foundation along my jawline, below my cheekbones, and along my nose. I thicken my eyebrows and "sideburnish areas" with an old mascara and pull back my hair.

Take a second to admire my hasty 5 min cross-dress then scrub it all off. Ugh. I don't make a very convincing guy. The burning on my face feels like a mix of shame and harsh makeup remover.
>> CA No. 12884
So I was having a looking-good day today and I accomplished 99% of what I needed to get done. So when my roomie asked me if I wanted to go to a party at the house across the complex I said sure because I was in a good mood.
There were two parties going on in our complex, so we went to the closest one and there was nothing going on there, it was pretty boring. Then we went to the second one and it looked fun, there was good music and people were playing drinking games and shit and I was like okay cool, looks good. Then I take a better look at the people there and the first person I saw was my ex. Nope. Nope nope nope nope nope nope nope.
I went back outside and my roomies came out and asked if I was okay. I told them what was up and they agreed to go to the other party again. Unfortunately I was too rattled and uncomfortable with seeing my ex that I couldn't loosen up and talk to these people that I'd never met before so I just gave up and went back home.
I know the campus is small, but can't he just give me one night of peace?
>> US No. 12885
I think I have this fear that I'll always be an outsider

Like I'll never really be accepted into a big close-knit group where everyone implicitly trusts and accepts one another and that I can actually make a difference on other peoples' lives

I want to help and make an impact and have my words have the same weight I want them to have onto the people I'm attempting to deliver myself onto but sometimes they ring hollow because even the most well-meaning stranger like myself can write a whole speech trying to cheer someone up and it won't mean anything to that person because I'm not special to them

IDEK if it's selfish or something I just feel like I have this responsibility and I'm failing miserably at it
>> CA No. 12887
"Oh I know you wouldn't steal my candy, you're too healthy."
Weight loss feels. It feels good. Alternatively, I eat crap when I'm with my friends and super healthy at home.
Oh I'm going to my friend's house? I'm gonna eat chips and muffins. Welp, just an apple for lunch for me.
>> US No. 12891
In my graphic arts programs, I keep running into issues that aren't discussed in my teachers' tutorials, even if I watch or read them multiple times, and even though they've given me their emails in case we have other problems, they just say "Look at the tutorials. If you look at the tutorials, you won't have any problems, and if you have any problems, you aren't watching the tutorials at all."

I have literally not had a single art professor who ever went "Okay, I admit I explained this poorly, or something came up that I didn't expect and therefore didn't explain in the tutorial, so I'll explain it now". I would switch majors in a heartbeat, but I don't know of anything else I feel I have strength in and I know my parents would never leave me alone about it, but this makes me so angry.
>> No. 12896
This is my one day off this week.

I don't want to go out.

I don't want Barbara to drag me anywhere.

I just want to play a video game, talk to Sweetheart, and relax.

But naw, making me feel like a bitch because I want to relax after working so damn hard is good, too.
>> US No. 12897
>> US No. 12898
I can't say anything to anyone without feeling inane, terrible, or annoying, especially around my classmates. I know I tend to worry ten times more than I actually need to, but what if I'm right?
>> US No. 12899

Are you in high school? Because if you are, I'm afraid that feeling can't be helped. You're probably not like that, (though I can't be sure, considering that I don't know you) but people are dicks.

On another note, my lab partner is a moron. She's not durr-hurr stupid, but she does ridiculously stupid things in lab that causes me to doubt myself, and it later turns out that I was right all along and we just wasted fifteen minutes. This is the second time she's done this shit.
>> US No. 12900
College, unfortunately. I know the feeling can't be helped, and that in college things don't really improve, but I don't want to let my friends down or embarrass myself.
>> US No. 12903
I've been on the verge of freaking out for several months now; I have no one I can vent to. I don't want to talk/vent/rant/cry/whatever at my friends and family, because the former don't need to know how much of a dead-end nutjob I am and the latter could care less/have heard it all before. That, and it really would be me whining.
I don't really know what to do and I'm getting really stressed out from bottling so much frustration, mostly direccted at myself.
>> US No. 12904
Well you can always vent to us. That's what this thread is for. Not quite the same as face to face, but still pretty good.
>> US No. 12905
can anyone give me some advice on how to deal with living with someone whose ignorant? My roommate is pretty racist and homophobic in a passive aggressive way.

It's seriously getting me down.
>> CA No. 12906
Either tell them you don't approve of the behaviour, or get a new roommate.

My feelings:

So fucking thrilled.
>> US No. 12907

A friend came through my grocery line yesterday, and I can't remember how we got on the topic, but I mentioned Obama. Didn't say I was for or against, just mentioned him by name.

Customer in line behind her: "You'd better not talk about Obama around these parts."

I smiled sweetly, clicked my light off, and directed him to another register. Fuck if I'm going to let anyone threaten me at work again.
>> US No. 12908
So, I've a bit of a problem that begs to be solved. And what better way than random people on the Internet?

Here's the thing: So I had this boyfriend, right? Let's call him: RED Soldier. Solly and I broke up about, say, 5-6 months ago. Truth is: I never really was ready to let him go, but it needed to happen; because, if he was the RED Soldier then I was the BLU Medic, and you can imagine how that went. FUCK YOU AND YOUR POLITICAL VIEWS. 'MURICA. I digress.

So along comes the BLU Engineer - whom had obviously liked me for a while. And when I say "for a while", I mean FOR A WHILE. I jumped into a relationship with Engie about two months ago because I like to consider myself the "move-along" type.

The most obvious rebound in the history of rebounds. Amirite?

Well, this occurred to me a few weeks ago: OSHITREBOUND. I'm a monumental dumbass; please don't ask why this didn't happen sooner.

Point is: Engie's a good guy, and I couldn't ask for more from him, but damn Soldier to hell; I haven't gotten over him after months of denial and finally realization. The only problem is that it was ME who was all, "Hallo Herr Engineer! Care to go out sometime?", and I feel that after what I did: the least I can do is give him an honest chance to fully win me over (as more than a friend).

So riddle me this: What do?
>> US No. 12909
Started T yesterday. Holy sweet relief. It was only the first shot, but I already feel like I've climbed this fucking MOUNTAIN in my life and I can just get on with the rest of it now. The Center LA needs a little work, but it's a miracle. Worth the hour wait and the royal bitch who wouldn't use the right pronouns in a trans* care clinic. She actually had the fucking nerve to look at the other pharmacist and roll her eyes when I asked her to use my preferred pronouns, which are very clearly listed on all of my documents, which she had to look at. The other pharmacist looked terrified that I was going to kill them both.
>> US No. 12910
Congrats! Too bad about bitches, though.
>> BR No. 12911
File 135269624755.jpg - (20.16KB , 258x258 , i-am-error.jpg )
I'm feeling like shit more than i usually do.

I give this idiot drawing as a gift for a person. I didn't say it's a gift 'cause i'm an idiot and i was too shy to say "hey, this is for you" and besides, it would mean nothing to -45 since i always show her my drawings (and it always about her stuff, fanfics, characters etc, exactly like this one) with the same "hey, look i did a new drawing" dumb remark. She is the only person i show my drawings btw. And i have this feeling it's not only because i don't have any other options (oh, i'm not in love with her or something. Just sayin').

And, then, i don't think she likes to chat with me that much, so, to break the ice, i said some stupid little comment among the lines of "ya know, i think i'm getting shittier in this drawing stuff...or maybe it's because computer screens make everything look ugly?"

And then she said: "Telling you the truth, you are getting a little worse..."

She didn't say it on purpose, or to be an asshole. And i'm not sad because i can't take criticism. I pretty sure i can. I already did many times, without worries. The only criticisms i srsly don't care to worry about are those baseless and/or from people that can't put two words together without being rude and impolite.
And she is neither.

Meaning, i am hopelessly sad because i, again, couldn't give her something nice. I, again, couldn't make nice stuff to people that do nice stuff to me. And they do it properly, achieving the most wanted goal of making me happy/feel good. I am unable to do the same, apparently.

I just wanted to give her something good, nice, that she would be all "omg! This is awesome! LMAO look at this, it's perfect" and i screwed everything. Again.

I just wanted to make her happy. Why can't i do such a simple thing...?


(Sorry about my bad english and the strange comment. I just wanted to vent, and i don't have any other place to do so. And I'm feeling too angry with myself to sleep properly.)
>> US No. 12912
File 135274341966.gif - (100.20KB , 448x326 , hugs84.gif )
Hey, we all have those periods of time where we aren't our best, art included. But you really shouldn't be down because that means you should try to make something even better. You can only go up. And I doubt your art is getting worse. The only people I've known whose art either stays the same or gets worse are people who can't take criticism, or they don't actually try to improve. You don't seem like either of those things, so just pick yourself back up and try again!

(and if that doesn't make you feel better here's a cheesy picture of an elephant wanting to hug you)
>> No. 12914
File 13529984589.jpg - (59.65KB , 502x338 , burrowing owl - profile portrait.jpg )
My face when people coming to me about their personal problems with my boyfriend "for the good of the group." I don't fucking care if I'm an admin of the group, if you have a personal problem with someone, take it up with them. I'm not here to mediate your bullshit "he said she said" drama.

Not to mention, it was one person speaking on the behalf of, and I quote, "many many" people. Said one person refused to give examples and refused to believe that any of the problems were simply misunderstandings.

Donesies. Take it up with my boyfriend, we're all adults here and I'm not his fucking keeper.

Not to mention he doesn't have a bad bone in his body, so I don't know what the hell it is he could have said about anyone - especially because I'm within earshot of him about 99.5% of the time.
>> No. 12915
All things considered, this is a real stickler. Can I ask why you split from solly man? Was it solely society casting a judging glare at you?
>> No. 12916
I'm trying to finish up my training tests for my computer course, and the ITlab testing program is just fucked so many ways from Sunday. Drives me nuts. Won't go into details, except to say that it's supposed to go like this:
Do a pre-test. If you get any questions wrong, it sends you to training, to redo those questions, and trains you how to do it if need be.
The questions are supposed to be identical on both sections.
This time they were not.
The training gave me a question I already knew how to answer.

Just UGH. Technology sometimes.

-Case in point, failed the captcha for this, I don't know how many times.
>> No. 12917
I'm trying to finish up my training tests for my computer course, and the ITlab testing program is just fucked so many ways from Sunday. Drives me nuts. Won't go into details, except to say that it's supposed to go like this:
Do a pre-test. If you get any questions wrong, it sends you to training, to redo those questions, and trains you how to do it if need be.
The questions are supposed to be identical on both sections.
This time they were not.
The training gave me a question I already knew how to answer.

Just UGH. Technology sometimes.

-Case in point, failed the captcha for this, I don't know how many times.
>> No. 12918
File 135305086312.jpg - (25.73KB , 700x560 , lonely[1].jpg )
I am getting increasingly lonely. It seems to be very hard to make friends here at college, and friend-making was never anything I was good at anyway. I'm doing alright in my classes due to this lack of an ability to form social bonds, but I find myself talking to my computer screen more and more.

I just...I really seem to lack the ability to form lasting relationships. It's not that I don't try, it's just that the large majority of my friendships have fallen into ruins because of me being a sometimes-all-the-time doormat.

I mean, it's funny, because I don't like people that much, and I never really minded the lack of friends before I came here. I think it had a lot to do with me and my family getting along well, though, so I had them before I came here.

...Sorry for the long post. Just needed to write this out, I think.
>> No. 12919
They say that what you don't know won't hurt you.

I didn't know what the meniscus was.

I tore the one in my right knee last night.

Now I'm in a shitton of pain, and I have two more eight-hour shifts on my feet this week.
>> No. 12921
Does anyone feel like a loser all the time?

Lately I just can't stop feeling bad about everything. I hate myself and everything and I just can't stop feeling sad. It wont go away and I don't understand why.

I try to be outgoing but I can't seem to make strong friendships or connections, my mom recently had a relapse with her alcoholism and started drinking again, and I always walk around with this feeling that everyone hates me. It's getting so hard to socialize. I'm terrified to talk to people now, even online. I always think people will think I'm bothering them.

with my mom's drinking there isn't really anything I can do about it. I've tried talking about it to her but she shuts me out. There's nothing I can do. I can't physically MAKE her do something about it.

People always tell you that things get better but lately it feels like thats just not true. I just can't stop feeling sad or worried about everything.
>> No. 12922
Just got a new job. enjoying it considerably.
>> No. 12923
File 135319593818.jpg - (17.20KB , 514x100 , lolwhut.jpg )

That sounds rough. If you need to talk, my E-mail's in the name.

I just wanted you all to know how freaking much I love you guys.

Ya'll are awesome. :)

Also, Captcha is trying to sell me real-estate.
>> No. 12924
File 135322891665.gif - (476.11KB , 500x264 , saddestdalekinthewholefuckingUNIVERSE.gif )
I just found myself do what i didn´t wanted to do. Bargain with my ex. How we still could work and that the whole distance thing can be helped and yes. He didn´t sounded that enthusiastic. But at least i tried right? Even if it wounds me so much that he went and did the thing i feared the most. Even after i told him, hey be carefull you know how i still sometimes hurt from the last time i felt. And i bought every maybe and promise and had the same hopes he had and planted in my heart for our future.
It took so long to trust this whole thing like i do now and why i did now held to this last hope. And he just crushes it. He doesn´t even seems to want to listen to it and shoots every possibility down.
And he was someone i trusted in this whole wide world. Where i laid my heart bare and my sorrows. And now? I don´t trust people that much i don´t let them in in sorrows out of pride and fear. I ask myself now the question all broken hearted ask themselves. Will i trust someone that much again? And i ask myself. Will i find this perfection of a relationship again? Where i can speak my mind and shouldn´t be that much worried (but still am in the deepest of my mind) that i sound childish, weak or just plain dumb? It hurts. I had all the dreams and wishes and hopes and now all of a sudden they just die. Again. And i´m tired, i already know sometimes a relationship doesn´t last, but this time we both went into it like that. This time should last because we both are tired of looking and we don´t want to wait and we both don´t want to go again in the circle of getting heart broken. And now this. I can´t even hate him in the moment this much. And even if i did like a little brave soldier already put all his stuff together to give back... it hurts so much. Again fairness doesn´t seem to exist in relationships. You either swim or drown.
But well still carrying on. Maybe should just finally shoot down the wish of my childhood to have a own little family and someone to ever be on my back no matter what. Gonna concentrate now more on my life even if the thing i worked to again vanished.
>> CA No. 12925
Back on tf2chan! I don't know why but it wouldn't load on my computer for the past week or so. I had to check on my ipod touch. It just wasn't the same.
>> US No. 12926
I'm in a similar boat. I wasn't super close to anyone as a kid, and I didn't mind so much, but the latter part of high school and now college, I get really insecure about it. Everyone was growing up and developing lifelong friendships and dating the people they've gotten engaged to by now, and I couldn't even say "hello" to most people without getting glared at, and when I was finally accepted by a group, I'd stand by the sidelines awkwardly while everyone gushed with my few friends, afraid to say anything.

I've asked my parents for advice and they rolled their eyes and screamed at me over the phone and have always sort of treated me like a pain in the ass when it comes to hearing my problems, and then they change the subject.

The few friends I do have are online (or we met a couple times at high school/my old college and I added them on Facebook but I still feel really awkward talking to them), and I secretly scrutinize every action I make with them, sometimes I feel like they don't want to talk and I feel awful.
>> US No. 12933
I get what you guys mean

I don't understand why even hanging out with someone is hard for me. Whats wrong with me.

I'm starting to get to this weird place where I think everyone hates me and I actually find facebook terrifying. I don't want to be alone. I don't understand why I cant interact with people like a normal person or why I can't seem to form strong bonds anymore.

I force myself to go out and talk to people and focus on school work and stuff but sometimes things just get to be so much it feels like a dead end to me. I feel very alone and trapped sometimes so much so that it gets overwhelming

i guess i feel very unloved and im trying to fix that but i have no idea what im doing

im sorry i just needed to say something
>> CA No. 12934
My armpits just decided to become allergic to my deodorant that I've been using for years. Hives are fun.

I just feel bad for everyone around me. Can't use deodorant until the rash clears. Good thing I sit next to a really smelly guy in class so no one notices.
>> US No. 12936
File 135398794353.png - (119.27KB , 1500x1244 , weeehhhh.png )
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.


I should no longer drink while sad. It only makes it that much more depressing.
>> CA No. 12940
Can't get to sleep cause caffeine so what should I do? Did someone say angst? GOOD IDEA! LETS SPEND TWO FUCKING HOURS FEELING SORRY FOR YOURSELF.
>> US No. 12941

compared to me whose awake because she's absolutely livid at her best friend and wants to throw her over a bridge (metaphorically speaking)

tell me, what is normal for best friends drama wise? What is it normal to get into fights and arguments about? I don't really have a frame of reference for this sort of thing. I ask this, because apparently:

"man when we fight its rough but WHEN WE WORK WE WORK SO WELL"


we had two fights over the course of 3 years or so. And they were really stupid.

but this actually occurs to me that i didn't really have a lot of friends growing up and didn't know enough about other peoples friendships.

I have NO idea what a normal relationship is supposed to be like

someone describe it to me?
>> US No. 12944
To go to class or not to go to class. I already missed my first one, and now I'm heavily debating going to the second. I should go, but I reeeaaally don't want to considering I only got about five hours of sleep and I didn't do my homework. There's only two weeks left of school anyway.

In other feels, I am so over my mom that I'm legitimately ready to just quit my job. Which is stupid considering there's no work around here. I'm looking anyway, but I seriously cannot handle her abuse anymore.
>> CA No. 12946
I was super hungry all afternoon, and now I'm not. My stomach just hurts really bad. I think I'm going to make myself drink some tea or something.
Why cant I just photosynthesize for nutrients?
>> CA No. 12947
I was super hungry all afternoon, and now I'm not. My stomach just hurts really bad cramping. I think I'm going to make myself drink some tea or something.
Why cant I just photosynthesize for nutrients?
>> US No. 12948
Sometimes you don't eat for so long that you stop being hungry. This is a bad thing. You should eat on a regular basis. Don't be like me, I got sick and couldn't eat much, and continued not to eat because I was depressed and masochistic and thought I deserved to be in pain. Retraining myself to eat was and still is one of the hardest things to do.
>> US No. 12949
Only two more days of school to get through. I feel like I am dragging myself to the finish line by my fingernails. So tired. At least I get a two month winter break.

On the bright side, boyfriend and I went to Universal Hollywood yesterday for free. Won a couple of tickets in a raffle at a Christmas party. Took the train there for the first time, which was nice, although the subway was downright terrifying. All in all a really nice way to celebrate our first anniversary.
>> US No. 12950
>>two distinct groups of people being loud, screaming, running around in the hallway, blaring their music, ever since that week we had off due to Hurricane Sandy, sometimes until 2 am
>>get sick of it and ask them to turn it down
>>"no", "don't snitch on us", "you're just doing this cause you're racist", proceeding to turn the music higher as I'm standing in the hallway

>> CA No. 12951
Dear bff:
Just because you're an animation student doesn't mean you can tell me what I'm allowed to like in an animated movie. I know you've had three years experience learning the recipe for a good animated movie, but that doesn't give you the right to talk to me about movies like I'm an idiot. Don't tell me about how my interpretation of a movie is flawed just because it isn't the same as yours and don't tell me how my favourite character is a stupid one just because you like another one better. That's not being a good observant animation student, that's being a narrow-minded cunt.
>> CA No. 12952
I had a girl like that in my English class. She saw me reading Waiting for Godot before class started, and asked me what I liked about it. When I said it was the absurd, silly little bits that made me smile (like Estragon talking with his mouth full, losing his pants at the end, etc.), she tried to tell me that I had been 'reading it wrong'.

And hey, maybe I am. Every production of Beckett's works that I've seen seem to be monotone, flat, and dark. Maybe I'm the only one that can see the energy, that can see the jokes. And MAYBE I'M CONTENT WITH THE WAY I'M READING THE DAMN PLAY.

Plus, this is the same chick that insists The Importance of Being Earnest is a straight drama, not a satire. And she keeps fucking calling Algernon Al-Ger-non, with a 'Get' kind of G, instead of the J kind.
>> US No. 12953
I'm an animation student (almost a Senior), and I feel the same way you do. I remember getting into an argument with my teacher over me defending Archer. No, the animation isn't stellar, but the writing is hilarious, and I think if it came down to it, I'd rather see a poorly-animated show written well than a beautifully animated show with no script to back it up.

I remember "Waiting For Godot" and "Flowers For Algernon" being in one of our English books, and I read them for the heck of it because I knew we weren't going to get to them. Not really knowing anything about Beckett, I read "Godot" all in a snarky voice in my head because I interpreted it as sarcastic.
>> CA No. 12954
It's been a long time since a fandom has punched me in the face like the Hobbit just did but... it feels good to be passionate about something again.
>> US No. 12955
I have mixed feelings about seeing The Hobbit. On one hand, it looks really well-done and epic, and Martin Freeman is a good actor. On the other, Martin Freeman is apparently an absolute cock (apparently he's homophobic and hates Asians), and for whatever reason, I loathed the book as a kid. I don't remember why I hated it so much (probably because I refused to believe at the time anything could hold a candle to the first Harry Potter book), but I've always felt guilty about not being a passionate Tolkien fan ever since, like I was doing a disservice to my geekiness as a result.
>> CA No. 12957
Hey now Anon, there's no such thing as a proper level of geekiness or a 'disservice to your geekiness,' you put it. You like what you like to the degree that you like it and there's nothing wrong with that!
>> US No. 12958
> watch awesome show
> enter fandom
> check tags on tumblr
> ollies out of fandom 15 minutes later because the majority of the art in the tag is the fandom turning one of the male characters trans and drawing porn of him in positions that are clearly fetishizing a male in a female body

And then I can't even voice my concerns about it, because on tumblr, you can be offended about anything unless it's the fact that porn of transfolk makes you uncomfortable, because then you're apparently ~transphobic~. Sigh.
>> US No. 12959
> High on pain meds after surgery
> Enter nice guys discussion on r9k, wind up giving serious relationship advice
> Also send texts to ex that amount to "I PLATONICALLY LOVE SO FUCKING HARD MAN" out of the blue
> Also draw a picture of a fire for my mother since she couldn't build a real one because it was too windy

This has been an interesting ride.
>> US No. 12960
if you can clearly explain the part about how it feels like it's fetishizing the trans* aspect rather than respecting it, i think that's a post that needs to be made, tbh - assuming you feel up to dealing with the inevitable people who kneejerk shrieking at you instead of letting themselves learn from someone else's perspective. there are a lot of things that can be problematic about depictions of any queer sexuality - and i understand why some fandom people close ranks about being called out on it, not just because nobody likes being called out about anything but also because A LOT of the time criticism of fandom depictions of sexuality are centered around concepts which basically boil down to "ewwwwww these GIRLS are ENJOYING THINGS WRONG look at their nasty GAY SEX AND PORN" and aren't legitimate. but even so there ARE legitimate criticisms; some forms of slash do in fact fetishize gay sexuality, it's just that not all of them do, and some stuff where they decide to make the character trans* is fetishizing that. it's just important to express it clearly and explain WHY a specific thing is being fetishistic.

especially with trans* stuff because god knows we don't exist in pop culture except as hilarious jokes about trans ladies being chicks with dicks and so on, so it's good that people can at least feel visible in fandom - but it's not good if it's being done wrong

everybody should communicate and learn

most people, admittedly, won't and i completely understand if you don't want to deal with it, lord knows i've skipped making posts on tumblr because visions of anon messages danced in my head
>> US No. 12961

All of this.

Honestly yeah, I have tried making posts like that, but all I've ever been met with is what you said - kneejerk shrieking. That's the thing that bugs me the most, is that sometimes, people do things that make others uncomfortable on accident and they really don't mean to. Sure. But you know, sometimes in the real world when someone respectfully says, "Hey, that makes me kind of uncomfortable and here's why," they don't shriek about how I'm whiny and transphobic. (Because clearly I am phobic of myself.)

But this is exactly why I posted my frustration with it here. I know tumblr is going to tumbl on with their bullshit, I just wanted to vent it a bit. Sometimes it feels like TF2chan is the only part of the internet that ISN'T going to react that way (because, you know, we don't tolerate that kind of bullshit here). It's at least a relief to know I'm not the only one!
>> US No. 12963
I just feel guilty disliking something that's supposed to be a classic, even if they only reason I can remember disliking it (I haven't read it since grade school) is that it wasn't Harry Potter and The Sorcerer's Stone, which was my favorite book at that point, and I refused to let anything knock it off the pedestal I'd placed it on. Looking back, it was dumb. I'm still dumb, honestly. I feel bad having different opinions than people because I just...I've seen how vocal people can get if you disagree with them and I don't want to be seen as an uncultured soulless piece of shit because I don't see eye to eye with everyone, or make them angry and disappointed again.
>> US No. 12966
So, Grandpa's out of the hospital. How long he stays out this time, we'll see.

So, I'm glad I'm not an artist, and I'm glad I don't have a Tumblr. Sweetheart does, and higher artists treat her like absolute shit when she tries to be friendly.

For example, she was in a TF2 match with three other artists she admires, and when she asked if she could join, she waited for 40 minutes before one of them answered with "I'm sorry for the late reply, but this was a private match. We'll play this together next time, now I think you should go to bed, it's late."

She's crushed, because these three people were people she thought she got along well with. Turns out she isn't worth shit to them.

Meanwhile, I'm trying to cheer her up, and I don't know how.
>> US No. 12968
it was probably a lobby or a scrim? one can't just up and join a lobby unless another player drops,and only for that class.(unless it's a 6's lobby)same with scrims.
>> US No. 12969
It could be that it was a clan-only match, or a comp match. Don't worry about it. I'll gladly play with you both, and I'd really like to see her art!

I had a bit of a butt moment on TF2 today myself, people kept dropping out of our MvM map either because they were busy or they considered themselves too much of a MLG l33t ooh-look-at-my-new-gaming-computer selfish asshole to cooperate. I met a pretty bro Soldier, though, and I decided that I def need to get a Vaccinator, even if it's just for MvM.
>> US No. 12972
I just found one of those "die cis scum" tumblrs and one of the posts was about "dyke" being an identity.

Dyke is fucking derogatory. So no, dumbass, you do not get to call lesbians dykes. EVER. Don't try to mask your bullshit as something positive because nothing on this fucking social justice account is about social justice. It's just you talking down to people and making the prejudice people have to face about yourself. like you understand what its like to be in all these other groups.

and by the way coming from a lesbian - please , please don't call us dykes. It's actually really insulting and honestly, if someone called me a dyke I probably would stop talking to them. I know that some lesbians use the term ironically, or try to make it positive, but I don't think dyke will ever become a term of endearment and I don't think most lesbians will ever be okay with anyone calling them dykes. Sooo. Yeah.
>> US No. 12973
I'm ok with it, but I get that doesn't magically make it ok for everyone. Which is something so many of these SJW bloggers seem to believe about their own opinions.
>> US No. 12974

I have no idea.

She isn't mad that she couldn't play, just that she waited for almost an hour to be told to go to bed.

Rude, you know?
>> US No. 12976

Jesus dicks. And of course, you know, if someone tried to make "fag" an identity, tumblr would lose their shit.

I kind of also find a similar problem on Tumblr with people wanting to flaunt the shit out of being trans*. I don't know if this bothers anyone else as much as it does me. 'Cause I mean, I think this is probably the ONLY site I ever out myself on (because none of y'all know who I am anyway and I know this is probably the only place I'm not gonna get shit for it). I don't out myself on websites, I don't out myself to friends, strangers, etc. The only people that know are the people that I was friends with pre-transition. And I guess I don't really get why you'd want to tell everyone and their mother if you're legitimately struggling with transitioning/being misgendered/etc. It all kind of screams "look at meee!" to me but I don't know, maybe I'm just the only one who wants to puke, cry and or jump of a bridge when people find out I'm not biologically male.
>> CA No. 12978
tumblr has been bothering the hell out of me lately. God, so many attention whores that I might as well go rejoin myspace.

I couldn't even count on two hands the amount of people I've seen on there that claim to be gay, trans, or suicidal, and the whole time had it turn out to be just for attention. Yeah, there are legit people in each of those categories, but there are also a lot of attention whores, and they just belittle the whole group by using it for attention. Newsflash, barely-literate twelve-year-old: You can't really call yourself bisexual if you think having sex with girls is an icky and deplorable concept.

Just...ugh. Internet. I know there are attention whores out there in real life, but it seems like they all swarm here and compete to be king of the drama hill.

I have no problem with the people out there that are actually trans, or struggling with the idea of being it, etc. , but the ones that don't even really know what it is, and yet have decided they must be it, because they're a girl who likes to wear pants instead of skirt or some other ridiculous reason... Just. Ugh.

Offtopic new feeling: I rediscovered Archive of Our Own, and started reading fics in the L4D category. I found one that was 108 chapters. Thought 'there's no way in fuck I'll finish that'. Halfway through already, and had no idea.
I cannot go back to fanfiction.net. I have been ruined forever.
>> US No. 12979
So, there's this trans-woman who works with me, named Angel. She still looks masculine, but she's a she, you know?

Well, she does stocking and the like, and she always has her ear-buds in because her job isn't to interact with customers, it's to stock, and she's pretty shy anyways.

This one royal bitch I got today was griping about how 'that Mexican nigger man' didn't say hello to her. I smiled sweetly and told her that Angel doesn't hear anyone, so you have to get within her line of site to say hello to her.

That fucking bitch curled her lip back and said:

"That thing isn't a woman."

Final fucking straw. I just about popped that racist white bitch right in her smug little southern peach mouth, I was so pissed.

I've been mistaken for a guy too, and while it doesn't bother me, I can't speak for her. Maybe it bothers her, maybe it doesn't, but either way, she refers to herself as she, and she changed her name to Angel. That's good enough for me, and it sure as Hell should be good enough for someone who doesn't know her.

I mean, who the fuck does that? It's not like this bitch has any right to say who is a woman or man and who isn't.

As it was, I called my manager over, told her I had an emergency call, and let her finish ringing that woman up. I didn't want to say another word to her.

TL;DR Hiawassee, GA, is a backwater town full of racist, sexist cunts. Don't ever come here. I'm glad I'm moving out again.
>> US No. 12980
This is why I don't mention my sexuality much online. Tumblr is either very social justice or very against it, or thinks you're an attention whore, or says you're not legit because you finally admitted you like women after years of saying you're straight.
>> US No. 12983
i out myself and like to talk about the problems i face as a trans person because i like to talk about my problems as a way of dealing with them, personally

and as annoying as i find the people who are like "i must be trans because i'm a special snowflake and i don't like doing my hair" i find the "identity police" "are you trans enough" people even worse

i've been accused of not really being trans because i PAINTED MY FUCKING FINGERNAILS BLACK. god knows if you don't adhere STRICTLY to misogynistic concepts of gender roles you're NOT REALLY TRANS
>> US No. 12985

Hhhh yeeahhh this is a really good point too. I've been accused of being "not really trans" for reasons they couldn't even explain to me?? They just "didn't really think" I was and that's all I could get out of them. A friend of mine also overheard at a con, "I really love eels but I wish [s]he wouldn't play trans."

That's my issue with ever bringing up the topic of fetishizing trans porn, flaunting sexuality, etc being problematic to the LGBT community. I don't ever want to seem like that kind of person. I'm really just talking about the ones who obviously just want to be special snowflakes on the internet and make it really really shitty for the rest of us, but it's nearly impossible to bring that up without seeming like a judgmental asshole who accuses people of faking their sexuality (even though it's obviously a real problem).

And the worst part is it's a goddamn shitty chain reaction, because those people exist, which then make the ~trans police~ people crawl out the woodwork, which makes more ~special snowflake trans~ because they know they can get the reaction/attention. Rinse and repeat.
>> US No. 12986
Fucking MIGRAINE this morning. Dying would have been a welcome alternative to that.

Honestly, I think all groups of human beings ever are shitty in precisely this manner - change around a few of the terms and you've perfectly described Geek culture. Or Christian culture. Or, hell, proctologist culture.

Point is, don't let this bullshit get to you because that's exactly what it is.
>> US No. 12987
Django Unchained was fucking awesome.

Medic fans will love it, especially anyone who was making Medic comparisons between Medic and Christoph Waltz in Inglourious Basterds.
>> CA No. 12989
Oh god, what have I gotten myself into?

Okay, long story short, I'm transcribing all of the Left4Dead dialogue in my iTunes, so that the title of the file, instead of 'hearboomer01', etc. will appear as whatever the character is actually saying. I thought it would be a good way to organize them, so it's like an actual scene.

Yeaaaah it was a good idea until I realized every character has about 3000 lines.

I've finished all of the ones pertaining to specific worlds, and all of Nick's entirely. I've just gotta go through the million adrenaline shot here grabbing adrenaline found an adrenaline shot here, etc.

Bright side, I'm currently taking medical transcription, so this is kind of good practice.
>> PL No. 12990
http://tf2chan.net/projects/res/1111.html - hope it's ok to hop in and promote this thing. Since a few folks expressed interest in this idea/item. In terms of updates: attending courses, experiencing potential (more serious than previous ones?) crush where the feeling is 75% mutual and he's an actual model for a magazine, also nice, funny and loves animals. Since it's started in the first 5minutes of the course and continued, I do hope that it;s not a joke or a conspiracy.
Also taking meds for a confirmed OCD, just with a one week break because of time restrictions/holidays, and it's not as bad as it's been, so it's a good sign. Now I see that it's a good thing that I saw how badly this negative mindset of mine affected me.
>> US No. 12992
>>family asks me to kill myself because I'm annoying and stupid and I let things bother me instead of letting them all bounce off (and also because my sister finds the idea of getting a cat just to leave it outside so it'll freeze to death hilarious and I told her it was cruel)
>>seriously consider killing myself, family actually offers to help
>>two seconds later they call me a psychopath and an idiot and banish me to my room to punish myself
>> CA No. 12993
So I was doing well with weight loss until I got a new scale. The old one was REALLY old and I knew it was a bit worn out. The new scale is electronic with these fancy sensors. It also says I weight five pounds more than I do on the other scale. and I thought I was doing so well.
>> CA No. 12996
Happy New Years All
>> CA No. 13006
> Read an incredible fanfic. Completely wowed by it. Beautifully-written. Author is clearly a genius.
> See author has a Sparkledog Central page.
> Visit Sparkledog Central page.
> "OMG Im so glaaaad u liek mai storeees!"

....what. Just...how on earth. Are you like, Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hide-me-oh-god-an-illiterate-twelve-year-old ?
>> US No. 13008
File 135723128964.gif - (671.24KB , 523x437 , 1354431103568.gif )
I just moved to Florida, I've only been here a month and a half and I really do miss Ohio. All my friends and family live there, and it's comfortable and fuck, it has hills and shit where Florida is flat and you can't walk a foot without getting covered in bugs. The first few weeks I was here I broke down and cried a lot...

So basically I am in a new place with no friends or family (except my dad because he asked me to come, and promised an art job, which never happened), and I don't know if I want to give it a year, or say fuck it and pack up and go back home.

May or may not be right image.
>> US No. 13012
Give it a chance, you might come to like it and make friends.
>> CA No. 13013
So someone hacked my steam account. That was nice to wake up to, on a day when I'm already stressed over auditions.
>> US No. 13014
I always considered my parents relatively controlling, but I've had friends who told me what they were doing was totally normal and within their parameters, so I felt guilty about complaining.

I was raised being told that because I was born female that I was always going to be female, that I had to love dresses and have long hair, that my career couldn't have me making more money than my father, that I was guaranteed to marry a man and continue my parents' religion and have a bunch of kids because that's what women do, and I don't know if I want all of that, and I know if my relationship with my girlfriend became serious I could never come out to my dad because he's told me he thinks gay people are weird and gross

I'm just so frustrated right now
>> US No. 13020
This thread consists of a lot of whining and bitching, and it makes it bullshit.
>> US No. 13021

You're pretty bullshit.

I'm sitting here lamenting the state of the porno industry.
>> CA No. 13022
Welcome to the world of feelings. They're not always positive.

However, mine at this moment are. Auditioned for Sweeney Todd, got into the chorus, and had the first rehearsal last night. I started fondling my script already.

It's my first time acting in two years, and I could not be more thrilled.
>> US No. 13023
Alright, a manager got onto my ass because I caught the flu last week.

He told me that from now on, when I 'decide' to be sick, I need a doctor's note.

Earth to manager, are you there? I work for fucking minimum wage, and all of us have been told that we're not allowed to work 30+ hours, because then the company would have to give us health insurance.

So, with barely enough pay to scrape by, and no health insurance, I don't think I'm going to go to the emergency room to shell out $500, just to have them tell me to stay hydrated and get rest.
>> CA No. 13024
I hate the companies like that. When I worked retail it was like that, too. Thankfully, I live in Canada, so the lack of health insurance wasn't as big an issue, but still, I'm not gonna go to the friggin' doctor over a little period-nausea. Ridiculous.

Okay, feelings:

My teacher is an absolute bitch, and up until this class, I actually liked this school. She has completely ruined six months worth of good days. She has no respect for us, and constantly bitches about how much grading she has to do.
Newsflash, chickie, you're getting paid to do it, and we're getting paid thousands of dollars to write the same damn block letter over and over again. No one's happy here. Don't tell us we can't bitch about the workload if you can.
>> CA No. 13025
*We're PAYING thousands of dollars. So angry I couldn't be bothered to proofread.
>> US No. 13026

Fuck that noise. If a teacher's going to assign busy work, they oughta suck it up when it comes to grading.

God, I can't stand that shit. Like it's everyone's fault but whoever assigned it.
>> US No. 13027

Aaah god I'm so jealous. I keep having dreams that I'm acting on stage again, I miss it so badly. Unfortunately I just don't have the free time for rehearsals and such anymore.
>> DK No. 13028
I was violated and abused as a child, by my father.
He was a pedophile and a plain horrible person, treated me wors than trash and manipuledted me into thinking I was nothing more than that.

I got away from him when I was 16. I cut all connections to him when I was 18. Today I am 20, and suffer a lot from the things that happende back then.

not long ago I was comitted to a mental hospital, becurse I wanted to commit suicide.
The doctors told "Just get over it".

Well guess what I can't. I can't just get over it, I can't get over the things my dad did to me, I can't get over the things he made me do, The things he did to others.

I can go a whole day, whitout thinking of him, and then when I close my eyes I hear the screams of the victims of the toture videos he would often, and make me, watch.

nut you know, "just get over it".
>> US No. 13030

That's heavy...

Hey, if you need to talk to someone, my email's in the name, alright?

Regardless, that's not something you can just get over.

Here, let me share; I'm a sexual abuse victim as well. Now, I don't often have nightmares about it, but I do get depressed around the time of year the rape happened, and sometimes it's heavy, sometimes it's light.

And, you know, it's taken years just to get to that point. The pain never really goes away. You can't just get over it. (Granted, I don't speak for everyone.)

However, the pain will eventually fade. It's not something that someone else can make happen for you, it's something you have to work towards, one day at a time.

Baby steps. It's going to be okay.

Consider it; you got away from him. You're free. You may not be mentally free, yet, but keep your head up, and it'll get easier.

You can do it; you're not weak.

First thing first; request a therapist and different doctors, because if they're telling you to repress it, they're doing something wrong.

Like I said, if you ever need to talk, my email address is in the name. These boards are kind of dead, but there's someone here to listen, usually.
>> US No. 13031
Sick of no one willing to encourage me to work out because, "Oh, you're not fat! You're perfect! Love the body you're in!" despite my weight being unhealthy, and I WANT to lose it, but my boyfriend still gets asked sarcastically if he's anorexic because he's underweight and has trouble gaining.

I don't understand this point in ~social justice blogging~ where the majority is discriminated against. It's okay to pick on skinny people, it's racist to reveal a comic character as white, but don't you dare try to get healthy because you should love yourself no matter what. Which yes, you should - but I guess trying to get healthy doesn't count as loving yourself.
>> US No. 13032

Well, yeah, you should love yourself, but loving yourself also means taking care of yourself.

If losing weight will make you feel more healthy, then go for it.
>> US No. 13033

I'm sure this is a horrid privileged thing to say, but I always roll my eyes at all the social justice bullshit that goes on. Those people are just full of rage about nothing, really, and they're doing nothing but whining about it. If they really cared, they'd do something more than bitch about it on their tumblr. It's kind of hypocritical that they say 'your body your life' but if you want to be 'in the norm' it's 'oh no society has implanted this idea in your head oh my god nooo.'

Alright, with the obligatory rant out of the way, there is nothing wrong with wanting to lose weight for any reason. When I lost weight (about sixty pounds) I felt so much better about myself, and not because men gave me more attention (which they didn't) or any other bullshit reason like that, but because doing anything physical was a hundred times easier. Climbing stirs? Easy as shit. Running? Holy shit I'm the Flash. Gotta climb a fence? No fucking problem, buddy.

tl;dr If you want to lose weight go for it. In the end, it's your body, right?
>> US No. 13035
File 135899283139.jpg - (25.66KB , 442x518 , spyat5am.jpg )
>>that feel when you come out to your parents as a lesbian atheist and their response is "you need a nice jewish boyfriend" followed by "you wouldn't have depression if you just smiled more and made more friends and did your homework"
>> CA No. 13036
Yay. Update. Decided to play Tf2 today. Turns out that when I was hacked, they stole most of my hats, AND my Strange Degreaser.

So yeah. Hopefully Valve gets back to me on this soon.
>> US No. 13038
I am so over prescriptions and pharmacies and having to take testosterone just to be comfortable with myself holy fuck.

So let's go back to like day one of getting T - they were supposed to give me four vials, i.e. four months worth. They hand me one vial. When I ask them what the hell is up, they tell me that there's some new law and they can only give me one vial. Whatever, I have it transferred to a pharmacy closer to me. No big.

First time I transfer it, they said they didn't get it. Had to call it in, order it, a bunch of stupid shit. But whatever, it's infuriating but I get the prescrip.

Now, about a week ago, Target pharmacy has stopped carrying it altogether. They can't order it, can't fill it at all. So I go to Walgreens. They tell me that the T is on backorder from the manufacturer until February. At this point I'm already a little whacko from my hormones being completely confused.

So I call the pharmacy in LA that I originally got the testosterone from. They've got it in stock. Awesome. I drive all the way from Anaheim to LA to get it, and then they tell me they can't refill it because I'm out of refills (which is bullshit) so that they need to wait until the doctor is in. The next day.

So I drive thirty miles back empty handed. Today, I get a call from my doctor, snarking at me about "why do I need a refill they gave you four months worth." I said, no they didn't, they gave me a month's worth and I've been transferring it. She goes "... I'll call you back."

Now their pharmacy is saying they NEVER gave me testosterone and that I only ever transferred it out. She tells me that I need to call Target and have them transfer it back. Target tells me that MY pharmacy needs to call THEM. MY pharmacy is saying that Target needs to call them.

I am so fucking frustrated and all I want to do is get my fucking hormones so I can transition and not want to bury myself in pillows and pretend I like how I look and never come out.

>> US No. 13040

I want to call both pharmacy's and scream on your behalf.

That is all three kinds of bad, right there. How fucking hard is it to keep track of a prescription?
>> US No. 13041
Argh, me too. I'm STILL dealing with them. Target pharmacy has at least been as helpful as they could in transferring the prescription back, which I THOUGHT they did yesterday. Except today, I called the other pharmacy, and they said they were just waiting on verification from the doctor to refill it. She calls me about twenty minutes later saying she never heard anything and to give her Target pharmacy's number. I told her what HER pharmacy had told me and then she tells me that her pharmacy has no record of talking to Target or it being transferred back. I think she's just a moron who doesn't know how to communicate with her pharmacy. And now I'm trying to call her and I can't get ahold of her.

I just want my fucking T oh my god
>> US No. 13048
I overheard a girl talking about one of the womens' sports teams at our school, and she was laughing about how aggressive some of the players were, and that clearly they were aggressive because they were raging with testosterone and had large Adam's apples, and that if she hadn't been close enough to "make sure" they had vaginas, that she would have thought they were men.

This infuriates me. A woman's a woman regardless of how "masculine" or "feminine" she is, regardless of whether she's cis or trans*. And women can be the most vicious to rip apart other women. I'm sick of this "you're too [x] to count as the gender you identify as" bullshit.
>> US No. 13050

It's been a few days; have they stopped with the clusterfuck yet?



Feels related; I hate it when I know she's bored with me but I can't just take her out like I want to. Fuck living two states apart, seriously.
>> CA No. 13052
Further updates. A week after contacting steam support, they say 'Whoops, sorry, can't do anything, it's been too long'.

Jesus, imagine if the real world's justice system was like this.
>> US No. 13053
I'm just going to say something we've all probaly been thinking.

>> US No. 13054
Lately I've been feeling all energy weird. One minute loads of energy, can't stop moving, then suddenly like I can barely keep myself from falling over, and back and forth. Not sure if it is too much caffeine (which could very well be the problem, trying to cut back), or the chest bandage being too tight and messing up something because it started about the same time as that. Just very weird feeling. Makes having a desk job unpleasant though. Dizzy me. Hard to concentrate.

And now for something completely different:
Why have people like this post
been writing "trans*"? What is the purpose of the *? I have never seen it that way anywhere else.
>> US No. 13055
I'm not entirely sure why either, unless it's supposed to indicate both transmen and transwomen (which would make sense), but that's how many of my trans friends on Tumblr write it, so I picked it up from them.

Adding onto my last post, my feminist side flared up again when I was in the car and the broadcaster mentioned that Beyonce was performing at the Superbowl, and my dad made a comment about how she should just perform naked if all she wore anyways was with her extremities hanging out. I was so tempted to backhand him, but I didn't think a kid should hit their parent.
>> CA No. 13056
It might be to indicate both transsexuals and transgenders. I'm not sure exactly what the difference is, or if there even is one, but the word trans* could apply to both.

I'm actually of the minority opinion, I guess. I don't mind doing taxes at all. But then, I hardly ever have to do anything with them. 'Oh, I spent X amount on school, and made absolutely no money this year. Hooray!'
And then I play the waiting game.

It's both depressing and hilarious that the government will send me money, because I'm too poor to pay the General Sales Tax on things that I buy. I'm so poor that I can't afford 13 cents on the dollar.
>> US No. 13057

The asterisk in trans* is just to sort of put a blanket term to all of the different terms that start with it, such as transgender, transsexual and transvestite. But since they're all fairly similar, most people just use 'trans*' to talk about the community in general without having to list them all off. (And even as a transdude it took me forever to figure out the difference between transgender and transsexual - basically, transgender just means that someone identifies as the gender opposite to their sex, but doesn't want hormones/surgery/etc whereas a transsexual undergoes the process of transitioning to the opposite sex physically as well as mentally.)

I think the only thing that I'll miss once I finally cut contact with my mom is that she has a person that does all of our taxes. Especially because I've got a big inheritance that has a lot of tax shit to go along with it.
>> CA No. 13058
Okay, so let me see if I've got this right:

Transsexual: I'm a man with a vagina, but I want a penis.
Transgender: I'm a man with a vagina.
Transsexual: I'm a woman that enjoys dressing up in men's clothing.

Essentially, anyway. Is this correct?
>> CA No. 13059
That last one's supposed to be Transvestite.
>> US No. 13060

From what i understand, it's like this:

Transgender- body doesn't match up to what actual gender is. A man may have female parts, a woman may have male parts. May or may not transition, but identifies with and lives as there true sex.

Crossdresser- someone who enjoys dressing as the opposite sex for fun. They're bodies match what they identify with. A woman who identifies as a woman but likes to dress like a boy sometimes. may be a drag queen.

Androgynous genderqueer, and non binary are there too, though I'm not sure how to explain them at the moment. I'll pop in later.
>> US No. 13061

Yup, at least that's what my interpretation is. I hear a ton of different things from different people, but essentially that's the gist of it.

On an unrelated note, super excited about the Paranorman/Coraline showing and Q&A afterward tomorrow. NOT looking forward to having to drive from Anaheim to LA by 7:30pm.
>> US No. 13062

So, now it's Feb, and I still haven't been able to land a job. Dad's new wife continues to make more and more jabs at me about everything she thinks I am wrong about. It's gotten to the point where she does this in front of my dad, or within earshot. However, as per usual, he's too worried about his relationship to tell her to knock it off. It's a bit... disheartening really, all I really wanted was his love and attention for once, which sounds silly coming from a twenty-three year old...

I've decided to go back to Ohio as soon as I can get a job and save up the money, but I don't know when that'll be. In the meantime, I'm going to have to file for financial instability for my loans, because after this month, I can no longer afford to pay them unless I have a job.

Between everything, I'm in a constant state of 'meh' and feeling hopeless, and since I don't know anyone down here, all I can really do (since gas is expensive and I am low on money) is just stay in my room all the time to avoid people (I have heavy trust issues).

It sounds silly and stupid, and others have worse problems than I do, but I needed to tell somebody...
>> US No. 13063
Finally opened up to my dad a bit about my mom's behavior. He sort of just sighed and said "Who are you telling?" He told me that all I can really do is try to let it go and love her anyway, because nothing you ever tell her will convince her that anything is ever her fault.

I feel really bad for my dad now though. He actually came to me and told me to please spend some time with my mother for his sanity so she'll drive him a little less crazy about it.
>> US No. 13068
So, I'm in a situation in which I feel I've either angered or alienated my friends, or am in the process of getting there. It makes me feel pretty crappy, and for a while, I've been feeling unmotivated and restless.
So I've decided to work on being a writer more in order to attempt to actually get a lot of my ideas on paper and fill this stupid void I'm feeling inside. Basically, what I'm asking is if anyone wants to beta for me? It's going to be original stories pretty much, which some fanfic drabbles I'm working on here and there. I can give summaries to anyone interested.
I also have a shiny new-y tumbl-r and oldy-gross dA; again, if anyone's interested. Also, a workshop thread. I love art critiques too.
I just want to have more motivation not to be a piece of shit lounging around all day at my parent's with ideas I never write.
>> US No. 13069
I'll give it a shot. I've been wanting to read more original fiction online anyways, and I wasn't sure where to find it.
>> US No. 13070
>> moving to Texas in FOUR DAYS

>> ohholychrist.jpg
>> US No. 13071
There was a conversation on Tumblr about whether or not genderbends were transphobic or not. I'm not really sure. If it's someone like Fionna, Cake, Ice Queen, Marshall Lee, Flame Prince, Sir Monochromicorn, or Prince Bubblegum from Adventure Time, most TF2 femclasses, or She-Ra, Princess of Power, then I see it as a non-issue, because they're not the same character as the original...but then, they're not technically a genderbend, either. I'm not really sure.
>> US No. 13072

Maybe it's my privilege speaking, but I don't see how they are.

You take the concept of a character and make them the opposite gender.

I don't get it. How are they trasphobic?
>> US No. 13074
I guess...thinking about it, when the character IS meant to be the male character, that making them trans* when they have no dysphoria in canon, or making the transition magical and seamless when it isn't irl would be insulting.

But if they're just a separate character who starts out as the opposite sex as the canon one, and then takes on a life of their own, I don't see the problem. Heck, I find Fionna and She-Ra more interesting than Finn and He-Man.
>> US No. 13075

Yeah I don't get that one at ALL. Typically genderbends have NOTHING to do with an actual transition from one gender to another, it's basically just remaking the character to be the opposite gender. I personally am made uncomfortable by making characters actually trans* (i.e. showing them with actual transitions and dysphoria), but that's only because it sort of triggers my own dysphoria. But regular ol' genderbends? Hell no, people need to get their panties out of a knot and stop trying to make everything offensive or phobic of something.
>> US No. 13077
> never flown
> never been to Texas
> never seen Sweetheart in real life

Let's fucking do this shit.
>> US No. 13078
>>teacher calls on me for a question
>>in the middle of explaining my response
>>classmate yells out how awkward this is

I need to climb into a hole and never come out. I am terrible at conversing.

This, at least cheers me up. You deserve all the good things, Kit.
>> US No. 13079

Good luck to you, Kit. Hope things go well.


Your classmate is the asshole of a baboon and deserves to be beaten.
>> US No. 13080

Danke schon, the both of you.


Wow, rude. Seems like the only 'awkward' thing was your classmate being a complete douchehat. I mean, who does that?
>> CA No. 13082
Okay, so I hate going to Ash Wednesday service, simply because I've thought it as hypocritical since I was eight (Do not disfigure yourselves to show you are fasting, as they do in the synagogues...now everyone come up here and put dirt on your foreheads), but I go for my dad's sake. I don't mind the other holidays so much, but this one just bothers me.

Tonight, though, I had the best moment. The priest put ashes on my head, as usual. When I got home, I looked in the mirror.

Now, it was probably an accident, but I had a freaking Z on my head.

My priest is Zorro, guys.
>> US No. 13083
Zorro masquerading as a priest needs to be a comic book.

Yeah, I just...even my therapist said that was ridiculous, and it just made me more confused than anything. I realized in the past, when people have been insensitive or downright bullies, I'm more confused as to why the hell people would do that in the first place than anything else.
>> CA No. 13085
Ever want to throttle your friends because their grammar and spelling is Just. So. Terrible?

One of my old pals from school just used the word 'rashionably'. Oh my god.

I realize not everyone's great in English, even if it's their first language, and I wouldn't say this to his face, but GOD I just have to vent.
>> AU No. 13086
Haha, so I'm not the only one!
The worst was when someone I knew got the following quote by Aristotle tattooed on the inside of their arm; Love is composed of a single soul inhabitating two bodies.

Inhabitating. Just.. wat. No. Get out.
I couldn't say anything because all their friends were commenting on how awesome and wise they were for getting it done.
>> CA No. 13089
If I could, I would just run around the world, teaching spelling and grammar wherever I go, and beating it into people until they learned.


>"happy valentinea days everyone. and even to one perso exspecialty hehe i love uou hun. .

>these are the flowers my boyfriendngot me hehe eed cordations and one fake rose . Amd mmm what he said was soo cute."

I mean, I can excuse the ones that are clearly typos, but cordations isn't even close.

>"ok i am going to do a facebook pole for the next 24 hours lol ever believe in double gangers lol i do and here is proof lol look at the two know that they are two different people lol now if you now believe that one is a double ganger like this if you believe they could pass as twins comment and if you believe they are the same person lol share it and see what other people say lol enjoy"

Oh, and awful poets are always amusing.

>"been thinking of my stuff in my life since i lost the woman of my dreams only thing i ca say there is no point in sleeping since i was told she fell out of love with me so i put it in to a poem and this one is for you -------- and no that even though i may not show it i will always love you but either way here is my poem:
my dreams have been shattered
I no longer feel flattered
every second without you
is bad but is wors when it is two
I longer wish to dream
because i've lost my beam
I need you to keep me going
As well as keep the dreams flowing
Baby your my all
so won't you plase give me a call"

Things like this cheer me up. I'm sure that's awful, but the last two are from a guy that I cannot stand, so it's great.
>> US No. 13090
...double ganger?
...He means doppelganger. Right?
>> AU No. 13091

This video was made to give you an aneurysm.
>> CA No. 13094
It seems like it, yes.

Oh god. So much love for this video.
>> CA No. 13097
Hey, question. If I were looking for help, or a tutorial, or whatever, involving nude Left4Dead model posing in Source Film Maker, where the hell would I post? L4D forum is dead, and we don't have a dedicated SFM forum. Would it go under Projects? Gmod?

And a feeling:

I've been working on doing some audio editing, and holy shit, it ended up SO great. So proud of myself.
>> US No. 13098
Cat number one occasionally gnaws important cords and cables into multiple pieces. Latest casualty was my tablet cord.

Cat number two deliberately pisses on clothes, pillows and the couch, but only if they are in the living room. But if it's in the living room, and it's soft, it's getting pissed on.

Cat number one is an absolute menace without cat number two around for him to burn all of his energy on, but I am out of solutions for cat number two.

I have horrendous allergies so I don't even know why we have two cats but god I love them. Sigh.
>> US No. 13100
So, I moved in with Sweetheart and her parents. They aren't charging me rent or anything, so it's pretty cool...

However, they're massive hoarders. They were using her room as storage, and there was stuff piled waist-deep in her closet, which hadn't been gotten into in seven years.

There was dog hair and dust all over the floor, because she couldn't navigate a broom through it, and the mess was just too much for her to tackle on her own.

We finally dug in and got to cleaning, and we've made so much progress it's amazing.

Until today.

Her fucking mother started going through the trash bags, called Sweetheart up, and chewed her a new one for throwing out things we had found in her closet.

Now, since there was shit piled all the Hell up, we weren't sure how badly it was until we started taking a closer look.

What we found were piles of roach droppings in everything. It was absolutely terrible. Hell, we had to get masks and protective equipment to clean in there.

I tried to tell her mother what we had found thanks to the mom's need to pile shit up everywhere, and all she did was scream that Sweetheart isn't 'normal,' she has no way of taking care of herself (untrue), and that she isn't mentally fit to clean out her room (also untrue).

So, we get to handle her bullshit tomorrow.

If she wants to go through that garbage, fine, but I'll be damned if she undoes the hard work we've put in, all because she's a filthy hoarder. Sweetheart deserves a clean place to live, and I'm determined to give it to her.
>> US No. 13101
So the boyfriend and I got invited to a SlutWalk in our area. We were thinking of going until we saw where it was being held - a Pagan temple in OC that is notoriously shitty to trans* women. They have a women-only service (as well as an all-inclusive service; the church is part of a Dianic tradition that has a focus on female empowerment so their Sunday services are women only), but they are apparently turning trans* women away at the door because their "policy" doesn't consider them "real" women. This is the quote (from the presiding priestess) that kills me:

>"This Temple defines Woman as “that human being bearing a naturally created womb.” You do not become something simply because you “identify” with that group. If I am white, I do not become “black” simply because I choose to “identify” with African-Americans. My skin is still white, no matter what I identify with. Women, in our thealogical definition, are those who are born with wombs, the ability to carry on human life, the ability to bleed monthly (of course, there are physical exceptions for those women who for health and physical reasons do not bleed, or who have had their wombs removed due to surgery–we are talking of the general definition of woman, apart from exceptions such as these )."

>"Creating a space inside a body surgically does not make a womb. Woman is not made on an operating table by a man in a white coat with a knife. This is not reality. To be able to “decide” that you are a woman erases all that Woman actually is. It erases reality."

So we make a post to the organizers of SlutWalk to let them know about this, assuming, especially considering they make a point that they are supportive of all gender expressions, that they just didn't know. Ten minutes later, our posts are removed and we're now blocked from the FB wall.

My mom (who is a journalist sort of) has now contacted the organizers telling them that she's going to write a story on it (as she writes for an LGBT column), and that she wants their side of the story before publishing it. Still being ignored.

So we've now started a counter protest against the temple and the organizers since they don't seem to want to give a shit about trans* women, you know, despite this being a feminist movement. We've also gotten in contact with a woman who runs larger SlutWalks who is a transwoman, and we're not the only ones who are pissed.

Things are getting interesting.
>> US No. 13104
File 136173958376.jpg - (67.38KB , 873x661 , turtleturt.jpg )

That sucks three different ways. Seriously.

How's the T going, by the way? Did the pharmacies stop being stupid?

So, fuck Petco. Sweetheart and I were in there the other day, and we saw this little ornate wood turtle flopped over by the side of his tank. His shell was flaking and peeling in giant chunks, which is a sign of shell rot.

On closer inspection, part of his shell was rotted down to the bone.

We decided fuck it, the little guy deserved better. We bought him, and we've started treating him.

Pic related, those white bits are rot.
>> US No. 13105
Well the good news is, the SlutWalk finally moved their location after my mom told them that she was going to write a story about it. Turns out the organizer is only 17. Uhhh.

FINALLY did end up getting my T. I had to miss a week, but I ended up getting it shipped from my doctor in LA. Ended up being better, too, because at Target I was paying about $27 for one month's worth, and having it shipped was $30 for four months worth plus needles. So now I can just have it shipped from now on and it'll be fine. Going in on Thursday for my first check up type thing, actually.

Fuck Petco sideways. Poor thing. The Petco by us is pretty okay, because there are a couple of girls that work in there that actually really do care about animals. They work at night when no one else is working in there, so I think they make sure things are okay for the animals even if it isn't their job. But most other Petcos I've seen are horrendous. Ten to twenty rats per tank that isn't even big enough for one rat to be happy. If I had the resources I'd just buy them all but I've got a zoo as it is.

On a side note, went to look at houses for rent today. I really like the one but I'm not sure what the deal with it is considering there's no sign in the yard, and the only picture on the realty site is the outside of the house from Google streetview. Seems fishy but I'm keeping my hopes up.
>> US No. 13106

Glad to know the walk's being hosted somewhere else. I never understood why some people use paganism as a veil for man and trans-man bashing.

The lady manager at Petco was wonderful, but...uneducated as far as identifying disease goes. And I want to fucking buy a little happy-trail cage for every single rodent in that store, just so that they can walk around without stepping on each other.

I'm glad things finally got sorted out with that. Best of luck! :)

Yeah, I'd check that house out first...that's sketch as fuck.
>> US No. 13107
File 136177418269.gif - (422.90KB , 440x330 , tumblr_lnbsd4qtKq1qdx0ti.gif )
Augh right? Pet stores are so dangerous for me because I just want to help them ALL.

On the rat note, we found a HUGE cage at Petco on clearance for more than half off... so our boys are moving into a new mansion on Tuesday when I get paid!

Also Kit can I just say that you are so pleasant and I enjoy your posts and I kind of really want to give you a hug okay
>> US No. 13109
Why no, Time Warner, I would HATE to have internet! It's fixed now though.


I made the silliest sound ever. You're so sweet, you know that?
>> US No. 13113
File 136207374296.gif - (468.33KB , 500x350 , tumblr_lkcjuhZ57d1qb5yooo1_500.gif )

I saw a really awesome notebook binder at Target yesterday. It was teal with lots of little owls on it. I really really really love owls so I was going to get it with my Target gift card from Christmas... but I didn't. And the ONLY reason I didn't get it was because of stupid fucking societal gender roles. I get not only mistaken for a girl, but ARGUED WITH that I am a girl, enough at my school, so I passed up something I really really liked to avoid having to fight people on my gender.

Things got so bad last semester that I had to get councilors and higher ups at the college involved. I single-handedly got a gender neutral, single-stall, locking bathroom put into the biggest building on campus. Which, might I add, the LGBT Rights Club, which I am not a part of because they're all pretentious assholes, took full credit for.

And to make it worse, gender role shit for me is not just male and female. TF2chan is literally the only place on the internet where I am open about being FtM. I used to be open on Tumblr, until I got too sick of being accused of being "fake trans," being accused of being sexist towards women, and being accused of being transphobic because I am "triggered" by porn involving obviously transgender individuals. I eventually made a new account and now, as far as my followers know, I am 100% a "white cis male." Which has its own set of problems apparently.

Tumblr has this fucking attitude like if you are not 110% gung-fucking-ho about something, you're phobic of it. SO SORRY that I'm not happy about the fact that I feel I've been born in the wrong body. I am just SOOO sorry that I want to puke when I look in a mirror naked. I actually saw someone who was trans* (or claiming to be?) call me transphobic because I didn't like trans* porn, as mentioned. He justified it by claiming "I embrace myself and my body." Like anyone trans* who doesn't embrace their body not matching up to their identity is suddenly phobic of themselves. Okay.

So congrats, TF2chan. You are currently the only group of people I have found mature enough to talk to about my transition. Which is amazing, considering I'm not out to practically anyone even within my personal friend group. The only people that know are those who knew me before my transition, boyfriend included.

ARRHJGAHDFHLAKa. Okay I'm sorry. I got angry. I think I'm done venting.
>> US No. 13114
File 136207599457.gif - (467.13KB , 470x353 , tumblr_inline_mh9gmkKVOR1qz4rgp.gif )

As far as Sweetheart and I are concerned, you're a man. The genitals you were born with don't define you, and I'm fucking sick of the notion that it does.

I can't believe that even today, people will argue with you when you say you're one gender or another. And fuck gender roles while we're at it. I have a little cousin who's only ten, and all he wants is a dress so he can be pretty. I don't see a damn thing wrong with it, but when I bought him one, his mother threw it out because it's not 'normal.'

Or that lady at my old job that insisted that Miss Angel was a man, when she's told me she's a woman. Fuck people.

Oh God, fuck Tumblr too. How dare you not want to see porn that makes being trans a fetish? I don't care if someone likes it, but I don't want to see it either. I don't see how that's wrong.

Get your butt over here, you need a hug.
>> US No. 13115
Our college's LGBT club sucks too, but for a different reason. All they do is look up funny videos from the internet when they're together. No actual LGBT stuff even going on.

This whole "masculine/feminine-only interests" and "you're/you look too [x] to be [y]" shit hurts both cis and trans* folk, as far as I'm concerned. You don't have to make excuses for why you like something, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone. And owls are adorable, I see just as many men squealing over baby animals as I do women.
>> CA No. 13116
Just a little mini vent session:

If any of you here ever plan on auditioning for a play, and get into the play, for the love of god, show up for rehearsals. If, for whatever reason, you cannot make a rehearsal, due to illness or tragedy, or if you have to drop out, then FUCKING TELL SOMEONE. Don't expect us to telepathically know that you're not going to be there.

And if you're not prepared to treat the play seriously, then don't audition, because you're wasting time, and if, god forbid, you get cast and just half-ass your way through it, then that's a role that could otherwise have been filled by someone that truly wants to be there.

When you half-ass it, or don't show up, then the rest of the cast has to pick up your slack, and our roles are already hard enough without having to play yours too.

That is all.

In other feelings, Sweeney Todd rehearsals are going great, and I'm excited to be a part of this play.
>> US No. 13117

The #1 reason I don't do plays/musicals anymore. I love love love being on stage but I simply cannot take that much time for rehearsals and such. I did it in high school when I went to a charter school and had nothing better to do, but I just don't have the time anymore. Makes me sad.
>> US No. 13118
File 136229297714.gif - (857.05KB , 350x197 , oh_wait_you\'re_serious_HAHAHA.gif )
Not only did I get accepted into grad school today, but I got an email from both an estranged sibling who hasn't had contact with me in 4 years and from an ex-friend who started ignoring me about a year ago. Coincidences, hurm. Little do they know, they can go fuck themselves.
>> US No. 13120
>you will never casually flirt with sniper by trying to stick pencils and shitup his butt in public
>he will never one day snap and start raping you with pencils
i don't know how much longe ri can fuckING TAKE IT,e4wlkwejofpklQD
>> US No. 13123

Hey, congrats on grad school.
>> US No. 13124
...look at your life, look at your choices.
>> US No. 13125
File 136243395764.jpg - (2.38KB , 106x126 , LAUGHTER.jpg )
>> AU No. 13128
File 136243624838.png - (246.32KB , 480x480 , dude_what.png )
>> US No. 13129
>>friend comes online right as I'm going to bed
>>"hey guess what my boyfriend and best friend aren't online so I've started stabbing myself"
>>plead with him to feel better and put the razor down, but asking him to do so and asking him to go to a psychologist makes him cut more
>>refuses my genuine declarations of caring
>>sends nasty responses to people who send love to him
>>know if he dies I'll be even more suicidal than usual

I don't think I could ever be a psychologist. I need to change majors again.
>> US No. 13137
Argh. So I pay my rent out of a trust fund left to me by my grandfather. Except I don't have full access until I'm 21 (ten months thank god.) Until then, my great uncle has control of it, and while he's nice enough to send rent checks, he's as old as dirt and dumb as a hammer.

I've been trying to get ahold of him all damn week trying to get a bank statement for the trust so I can give it to a realtor for a house my boyfriend and I are trying to rent. So I FINALLY got ahold of him yesterday, but he's on the east coast and I'm on the west, so the bank was closed by the time he called them. So he called them today (at 2pm his time mind you), and it turns out they won't even fax me a bank statement. They have to give it to him, who then has to give it to me. Except he's an old fart who doesn't even know how to fax, much less email, so he has to MAIL me my bank statement. He at least figured out how to send it priority mail, but it's the weekend, so I probably won't have it until Monday. I'm really terrified that this is going to ruin our chances with this house.

Granted, the house has been on the market for a long time apparently due to how close it is to other houses, but damnit I want that house and I'm terrified.

And don't worry, I know I am like the luckiest motherfucker in the world to have my rent covered, so I'm totally grateful for that. But god this old man is frustrating sometimes.
>> US No. 13138
School is making me very tense this semester. My dad has had a very "You MUST get all A's, OR ELSE" mantra ever since I started college, and now he's trying to push me to get on the Dean's List. I can't make friends in my class, everyone seems to only want to be friends with people they knew in high school, and my online friends want me to drop everything when they come online, and claim I hate them if I don't. I'm a Junior, why does this still feel like I'm a Freshman in high school?
>> US No. 13140
File 136304928276.png - (283.98KB , 397x517 , medicviolin.png )
Hey look, it's the SAME SHIT HAPPENING AGAIN. Apparently not responding to an email is grounds for MORE harassment. Damn shame GMail doesn't do more than filter emails to the trash. It's been months since I've heard from any of these folks and, last I knew, we were through. Also, how did they get my Skype? Thank goodness for the Block feature.
>> US No. 13142
I was fish slapped today.

I'm not even joking.
>> US No. 13143
AAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaa we got the house!!

We talked to our current landlord today and I dunno if she just seemed sad because we always pay our rent on time, but either way I kind of felt bad. She's trying really hard to get our fee down as much as possible (like taking it out of our security deposit) so she's being really nice about it at least.

But aaaaaa new house! More space! Second bedroom! Yard! Dog! I'm so excited holy crap!

The fun part is that my parents are moving April 6th. So I guess we're trying to get out of here ASAP so our move dates aren't too close.
>> US No. 13144

Good on you!
>> US No. 13145
It's starting to grind my gears over the fact that people with depression and anxiety are being pushed aside as "desperate, needy, needing buttpats" when a lot of the time, their behavior with other people is just a desire to make themselves feel normal and safe. Many people don't have access to medicine, either for money reasons, or because their relatives have blocked them from getting a prescription, and when you have anxiety and need to have "things are okay, I don't hate you" repeated a lot, you're aware it's illogical to keep asking, but your brain tells you you absolutely need to. I don't think enough people understand that.
>> AU No. 13146

If that grinds your gears, try dealing with people like co-worker [I thought I could trust] that I talked to the other day:

She insisted that people with depression and anxiety need to "just get over it." That because she had an alcoholic father and managed to get through it, everyone else has no right to complain. And she couldn't get her head around why it's so hard to get out of bed some mornings for people who wake up wanting to disappear from the world, while she's able to "get on with her day."

Oh, and apparently mental health problems for young people are non-existent and not valid, because we're "spoilt and need to toughen up".
>> US No. 13148
I was in a similar situation. A friend I've since distanced myself from told me my parents couldn't be abusive because apparently they're obscenely rich and spoil me constantly. Which is not true in the slightest. My dad has a main job and two side jobs, and I've essentially been told as of late "don't consider asking for anything, we can't afford it".

I think for some people medication and therapy isn't needed to move on from their depression, but that gives them no right to tell other people their feelings are invalid because they're having a harder time of it.
>> CA No. 13150
A friend of mine was having a movie night so a couple friends and I go over to her house. She brings this guy.
>says he's a teenager from the 16th century
>cries when I beat him at a card game
>Eats all our food. half an apple pie, full 2l of soda, shit tons of pizza
>doesn't pay for any of it
>when he doesn't get food, begs like a dog
>"don't watch Dr. Who? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU"
>Extremely overweight
I didn't think people like this even existed. He just makes me rage so fucking hard
>> CA No. 13151
Holy shit! I haven't been here in eons thanks to University and life going batshit insane on me, and my old afanfic isn't in the archives!

Reading all the old comments on it REALLY makes me want to work on trying to finish it again, but I'm almost afraid to. I started writing it when I was in a bad headspace, and don't want to fall back into that again... Plus I don't even know if anyone here is interested in reading it anymore...

Yet I feel terrible letting it die like that...

I can't seem to decide if I should leave it dead or at least try to finish something for a change...

On anon for fear of recognition...
>> AU No. 13152

If you are letting your fic affect you to the point it's messing w