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File 131402445446.png - (473.30KB , 700x488 , carrrrrk.png )
1500 No. 1500
Fich. Must I remind you all not to TOUCH the corkboard? After we all posted baby pictures of Scout's squidbaby, the weight was simply too much for it to handle.
BLU team, can you come pick up your squished Scout, bitte? Danke.
Well, I suppose all good things must come to an end, and thereby a new beginning. Try not to overload this board with baby photos (however ADORABLE they may be), or bodily fluids (really. This should not be so hard a direction to follow). We are running out of corkboards fast, and, since HQ is no longer watching us, it is unlikely we will get new ones anytime soon.
That said, post away!

[a baby photo of RED Scout's squidbaby is attached]
Okay, one more for good measure. I cannot resist! He is just so CUTE!
133 posts omitted. Last 50 shown. Expand all images
>> No. 1901
Eh, no, guess you wouldnt mind it. I honestly cant stand dust, myself, but Im weirdly fine with soot.

Last I checked the medbay, place was empty. Even our doc's candies were gone, and he never leaves without that stuff. Id call headquarters, but I kinda sorta dont know what they'd do if they found out I was back after the whole gas station thing. That, and the phoneline's busted.
>> No. 1902
Damn, will any of us ever get answers?
>> No. 1905
[The handwriting is slightly shaky; as if the writer was terrified. A few drops of blood dotted the note, along with some odd, glowing green substance.]
You guys remember how I went on that exploration through the GRN base? I swore to never go back in there again, right?
Well...I did. And barely made it out with my head attached to my neck.
Also, er, GRN Pyro, and anyone else still checking this board...I think I found out where the rest of the team went.
>> No. 1911
[The handwriting is sloppy, and there is a tiny blue hat pinned to the picture as well.]

I accidentially killed a little BLU Spycrab today.

I am so sorry, BLU Team.
>> No. 1912
Whatever you do, DO NOT go into the GRN base. I found a GRN uniform (probably from a sniper or medic--it was too badly shredded to tell) covered in blood on the outside walkway this morning.
If you need me, I'll be in GRN Pyro's shack, practically glued to my shovel.
>> No. 1917
Li'l Octavio's hooked t'respawn, no worries!
Scared th' dickins outta the little guy, though.

Yikes. Wish ya'll luck with that.
My machines ain't gonna do no good against ghoulies and the like.
>> No. 1919
[A brown paper bag is taped to the note, with the word 'CAUTION' scrawled on it.]
Can you still take a look at these for me, Engie? It's a bunch of stuff I found lying around the GRN base. What's Freaky is that nothing was damaged. At all. And it has this strange green glowing slime covering some of them. Don't worry, I was wearing gloves; though I still wouldn't touch it, man.
>> No. 1920
{the bag is missing from the other note, this one hastily scrawled messily on a piece of paper as if it were ripped from something and written in a hurry}

Py, you best get yourself and your friend outta there.
This stuff's highly radioactive. I ain't got a clue as t'what coulda happened to the GRN team, but whatever it was probably had something to do with it.

..... you might wanna get your buddy to a Medic, actually. If he's been there longer than you, than I'm willing t'bet he got too much exposure t'this. He could be in danger.
>> No. 1921
No, really?! I thought it was harmless glowing powder! Alright, I'll go see the RED Medic or something.
Also, a word of advice: don't let the glowing slime sit on ANYTHING that is easily corrosive for too long, or it will eat right through it!
>> No. 1933
Okay, I've got good news and bad news.
Good news is a few days ago, I FINALLY found my team's Medic. He nearly hugged me to death, and started rambling about how he thought I was abducted by aliens or mole people, then asked if they probed me or rewired my brain so I could smell his thoughts with my ears... He's fucking strange--okay, REALLY fucking strange--but he's a Medic for a reason.
Bad news is the rest of the team is gone. And by gone, I mean 'abandoned GRN base' gone. Worst part is even Doc has no idea what happened, and he was there!
You guys don't mind my Doc here, do ya?
>> No. 1934
[The note is written in dark purple ink.]
Hello, fellow earthlings! I am the one known as PRPL Medic!
I'm sad to say (or write down) that Pyro is telling the truth: PRPL team has disappeared. I was in town picking up more tinfoil and bandages and glue, but when I returned, everyone was gone! All of the team's personal stuff vanished, too, even all of my equipment! The only thing I've got left is my anti-mind control hat...
>> No. 1939
That THING you call a hat looks like a fucking goat chewed on it. Just get rid of it!
And NO, that doesn't mean give it to the other team members-- need I remind you of what happened with our Soldier last year?
>> No. 1940
[A cartoonish drawing of a frowning Medic with goggles is scribbled on the note.]
>> No. 1947
i peed in ur suit prpl pyro
>> No. 1957
So. Iv'e seen that all of you went back to fighting like real men, instead of bickering like little girls. Anyway, what's this about peeing in an employees suit? When i catch you i'm gonna beat you with my BARE HANDS! 10 Bars of Australiam says it was a spy
>> No. 1958
If you do that, Mr. Hale, you BETTER let me join you. Suit might be ruined, but I still got my mask n' shovel!
You got anything I could wear in the meantime? If ya do, just-- I dunno-- use your sheer mangrit to stick it to the corkboard or whatever.
>> No. 1959
[An old looking RED pyro suit is attached]
Alright then Pyro, bring an axe to cut his legs off or whatever suits you mate. Sorry about the suit, couldn't find anything else.
>> No. 1960
Eh, it's alright. Smells kinda musty, but at least it's better than my suit. Alright, let's go try to find this fucker...
P.S.: Whatever you do, Mr. Hale, do NOT go into GRN Base. Place has bad juju written all over it.
>> No. 1961
Greetings meat bags! I am RBT Sniper of the gray army, our forces have moved into this Green base you speak of Pyro. I can explain these "spooky" happenings, firstly we emit a green highly radioactive substance when we uh shit anyway our medic is a super "neat freak" as you humans say it, that is why the kitchen arena was cleaned up so quickly that you wouldnt notice.
*The note has ran out of room at this point*
>> No. 1962
What the FUCK are you doin' in GRN Base? Furthermore, WHERE the fuck is the GRN Tea--wait.
That glowing stuff was--
[The rest of the note is completely illegible, except for the words 'WHAT THE FUCK' written in bold print.]
>> No. 1963
Asfkj sdf sdkjfsdkjhf sdfknj-
>> No. 1964
I dunno mate, some spy came in here and slaughtered them, didnt leave a scratch on us though. And if you got some of that on you..... Well try burn your hands, it's hard to wash off skin.
(At this point the RBT scout filled up the rest of the note with a drawing of GRN Pyro covered in the "shit")
>> No. 1965
GRN Pyro? What--
[A little drawing of a laughing Pyro is scribbled on the note] Dude, that's nasty! Don't worry, y' can borrow my old suit. Just don't mind the slight smell. [A purple suit is stuck to the board]
Also, try to avoid a weird-ass Medic who blabs about lizardmen and Bigfoot and other strange shit. That'd be my Doc. Goes for you too, Robo-Sniper.
>> No. 1967
Sorry about sll of the hastle gents, these are my 'failed experements' to create a human A.I. Anyway my crawler broke down so we stopped in green base. Also we need some uranium, do you have some spare?
>> No. 1969
Sorry, we don't have any uranium or whatever here. That I know of, anyway.
Also, have you seen my Doc anywhere? Told me he was gonna go 'visit the Moon Men in GRN Base,' yesterday and haven't seen him. I thought I smelled something burning earlier, but then again this suit reeks of burning wood. Just lemme know if you see the nutcase.
>> No. 1970
We found the guy talking to our heavy about us being from a UFO, hee's safe with us, unless thay spy comes back. And the burning.... we may or may not have burnt his 'Moon cap' The on with the tinfoil covering it
>> No. 1971
[The note is hastily scribbled, as if the writer was freaking out.]
>> No. 1972
Thanks, man.
I really don't know what it was that I fell in, but it ruined my suit. Got in my gloves, too.
Really thought that I did a good job at writing with my hands shaking like that... That stuff burns when it gets on your skin, fyi.
>> No. 1973
Herr pyro you're handwriting is terrible, i would recommend going back to school. Anyway, this board is so filthy. I mean it has ink and blood spatters all over it! And i also smell piss Furthermore i think that the green base conditions are terrible, some half wit scout with a gibus is stuck in the
[The rant was cut short due to note limitations]
>> No. 1974
Wait, wait, wait, wait. What's this about a Scout? And GRN Pyro, I'd stay away from the base if I were you. A certain WHT Spy might be the reason your team is gone.
>> No. 1975
Well a scout got stuck in soldiers washing machine, all he does is laugh and shout profanity.
Anyway, yes it was a white spy that killed green team, he ripped out demomans liver and stuck it in his eye socket. Still you should stay away from the base, sentry buster has been having outbursts recently.


Also, captcha: jam-nuts, sBulsa
>> No. 1976
What color shirt's he wearing? You can always tell what team they're from by that alone. And how the fuck did he get in there, anyway?
Also, uh, lemme know if Doc starts giving you guys trouble. He decked himself out in armor made from various kitchen utensils, and has been 'preparing for the Sasquatch Invasion.' I swear, whatever he's huffing from that Medigun is causing brain damage.
>> No. 1977
That's the problem though herr pyro, he ran inside here naked, started humping our demoman and started cursing. Soldier chased the rascal into his war room and he is now stuck in the washer. He is a fascinating little gremlin, I think a vivisection is in order!
>> No. 1978
...Yeah. You do that, Robo-Doc.

GRN Pyro, you got anything to do with this? Haven't seen you much, lately.
>> No. 1980
Nope. Been keeping to myself since the rest of GRN vanished, really. Haven't seen any other familiar faces in forever, too.

It's... kinda depressing.
>> No. 1982
{the paper is torn and the hand writing is scribbled}

Guys, sorry I've been gone I've-

{writing is abruptly cut off}

But I'm kinda feelin' like crap 'nd I've been sick as shit and I don't know what the fuck happened and-

{the message trails off the page onto the board itself}

Imma be around, can someone send a Medic down 'cause I'll be around and-

{writing once again trails off}
>> No. 1983
WHT Scout? Wasn't BLK Scout looking for you? Please don't tell me YOU'RE the one in the fucking washing machine!
Fine, I'll send my Doc down there; just look for a Medic with one of those pasta-strainer bowls on his head.

Also, sorry that you've been feeling down, GRN. Hell, it's way too damn quiet. Except that I keep hearing weird shit at night, but whatever.
>> No. 1984
Don't be such a baby scout, oh and also i had to replace one of your kidneys with a robotic one so don't panic too much. Anyway, has anyone seen sniper? He went to the black base last night to salvage supplies and i have not seen him in days.Oh and before i forget, i found an engineer dressed in green inside my closet yesterday, pyro can you come and pick him up?
>> No. 1985
Oooh, you mean the Aussie moon man?? I found him this morning but he was bleeding and his leg looked like one of my brainwave-blocking hats, and I don't really know how to fix an organism not of this planet but I patched him up the best I could but his leg I had to remove because it was essentially pulp! I had to use a ton of superglue and aluminum foil, but he's doing fine now! And he hasn't probed me yet, YAY!
[A childish doodle of a Medic smiling is drawn on the bottom of the note.]
>> No. 1986
Thanks doc, still a little wonky. My heavy or my doc can patch me up in a bit.
Anyway some REALLY needs to take this engineer outta here,i don't think he can live on metal and oil much longer. Oh and finally stay away from Sentry Buster, he is getting angry a lot lately.
>> No. 1987
Thanks for the fix up doc, my doc can get a replacement leg for me.
Also we have an engineer in green stuck in base, he tried to whack spy's head off.
>> No. 1988
Sorry for the double post everyone
>> No. 1989
File 134916191019.jpg - (166.45KB , 1280x800 , ctf_turbine0000.jpg )
HOLY SHIT GUYS! I found 2 purple's dead in our vents today, it was a soldier and a heavy. I got a picture of the heavy but the soldier got carried away by the killer, when i went to check the body was gone.
>> No. 1990
Wait, hold on--how is that possible? Doc an' I saw them both back at base before the entire team disappeared. How'd they get th...
Oh God. WHT Spy. He's still here!
>> No. 1991

First of all, why is there a goddamn robo-doc? Second,The fuck is going on here?


Wait, what?
>> No. 1992
Long story, we had to stop at green base when our crawler was destroyed and we saw green team killed by white spy. We are now based here and you may or may not have a robotic kidney.
Anyway, sniper said he might do a little spy hunting, anyone else up for it?
>> No. 1997
[The writing is scrawled and mostly illegible]
>> No. 2001
The board appear to be cleared of previous notes, with a single neatly written card tacked in one of the corners. The baby pictures have been left behind.

Zere seemed to be a gas leak through all bases in zhe immediate area. We do not know how long it has been going on, though it appears to have happened some months ago.

Common hallucinations seemed to have involved, but vere not limited to, robots und fictional 'white' und 'purple' teams.

Zhose affected haff been dealt vith according, through cures und... other means.

Have a nice day~

((Retconning because so much faggotry happened after all that cool shit with the RED Scout and those other guys was over and really I miss the fun that was had before these weaboos invaded.))

((I'd start a new thread, but this one is still on the front page. If you new guys keep up the stupid crap, you're dumb and I hate you.))

>> No. 2002
Dude, why'd you have to shut the gas off? That shit was fucking awwwwesome.

Pretty colours everywhere you went.

Anyways, Nips says thanks for the birthday present. Socks are cool, I guess.
By any chance did you overlook the fact that my kid has no feet? Seriously, dude. Could've gone with literally any other gift, and...well, okay, maybe not pants, 'cause of the whole eight legs thing, but still. I mean, freakin' Heavy got him a bucket. He loves it.

Anyways, see you Monday, with my bat in your skull, as usual.
>> No. 2033
Woah, just got back from that team transfer (long story short, didnt work out and I'm now wanted in most of Hawaii)

Jesus, I didnt know paper could collect so much dust.
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