hi this is my first tf2 fic, first post on tf2chan, yada yada yada. So I've always toyed with the idea of femPyro/Engineer, and since Meet the Pyro came out, I've adjusted my headcanons slightly but I think it's worked out for the better. So yeah, f!Pyro/Engineer, mostly friendshippy/romance fluff, I'm posting it here because of noncon and abuse in later chapters. I hope you guys enjoy! (I know, genderbends, how boring, I'm sorry. This first chapter's not much, either, I just want to establish stuff). ~~~~~ "Mister Conagher. I'm going to cut right to the chase, I'm a busy woman after all. I've got a business proposition for you." Dell Conagher, RED Engineer, blinked in confusion. Pushing up his goggles, he tilted his head slightly as he looked at the figure on the screen. The young assistant to the Administrator - Miss Pauling, he believed - had appeared at his house on his day off, hardly spoken a word, and directed his attention to the image of the Administrator on a screen she carried. "Your family has done good work for us. And now we have a job for you. Bring it in." This last line was directed at Miss Pauling, who nodded at someone out of Dell's line of sight. "I believe that this would make a very good addition to your team. Of course, it's up to you whether RED team receives it. After all, you are required to give it the proper maintenance." "Alright," Dell started, confusion still evident in his countenance. "What've you got, ma'am? New weapons?" The purple clad woman on the screen merely smirked, and Dell looked up to see what looked like a human. It was humanshaped, no doubt, slightly taller than the short Engineer. They wore a red fireproof suit, heavy gloves and boots, and their face...their face was totally obscured by an optical mask. "What the..." "This is your new teammate. Pyro. Should you choose to accept it. Mister Conagher, it is up to you. We will provide the proper facilities, and you will be generously reimbursed for the inconvenience. But we need you to maintain this Pyro." There was no question in her tone. Dell knew how to interpret this, of course. 'You will look after the Pyro or you will suffer the consequences.' Dell sighed. Babysitting sentries was one thing. Babysitting a person? Well, that wasn't his line of expertise. But there was simply no refusal. "Alright. I'll do it." "Excellent." The screen went black, and Miss Pauling simply nodded to him. "You are being provided with a Mann Co. specialty...well, um, shed," the young woman started, not nearly as confident or powerful as her employer. "Weapons will only be available for Pyro at the RED base. No weapons are to be in Pyro's control, uh, when not at the base. It's, well, it's under control. You just need to make sure it can't, um, cause harm or damage. Helen - uh, that's the Administrator to you - thinks it would be best if you keep it locked in the shed most of the time." Dell blinked in surprise. It sounded like they were giving him a pet, not a human. Maybe the Pyro wasn't human. Nah, that would be too weird. "Oh, and Mister Conagher? Whatever you do," she leaned in closer to him, "don't. Remove. The. Mask." Straightening herself up, Miss Pauling nodded to the Engineer, before turning to walk away. "Have a good day!" she called over her shoulder, leaving Dell to size up the Pyro. "Mmrrph mmph mrrrrrrrrmmmph?" Dell sighed, his shoulders slumping, as he beckoned the Pyro to follow him inside. This was going to be a long day.
Please continue. Interesting concept-- and kinda cute.
Thank you, anon! I am basically typing this out of my ass because drafting what's drafting and who would even beta this so yeah it's still establishing fluff and what not I promise it'll get better, and yes, the end bit is me working True Meaning in there for the heck of it :U ~~~ The Administrator had been right, the Pyro had proven to be a valuable weapon. Dell had mostly kept his distance from the strange being, not really wishing to deal with it outside of battle, but on the battlefield, he didn't know what he'd do without...er, it. Soldiers and Demomen were trouble for Engineers, always were, but they could be relatively easily dispatched with RED's own Soldier, Demoman and Heavy (with assistance from their Medic, of course). The real problem for the Engineer was, of course, the enemy Spy. Spies could infiltrate their defenses, could send the Engineer to respawn with a well placed knife and easily disable a sentry and dispenser, crippling their defenses and allowing the opposition to make off with their points, or their intel. However, the Pyro, strange as they were, happened to be the best counter for a Spy about, burning the assassin and sending them off to respawn before they could even touch one of their sentries. Dell wasn't sure what he thought about the Pyro as a person - even on a team of mercenaries, someone who could wield fire so simply was a little terrifiying - but he had to admit that the Pyro was, as the Heavy would so eloquently put, "credit to team." The rest of the team seemed just as wary as Dell, in regards to their new charge. Scout, in particular, was seemingly terrified of the team's new addition, jumping up and running if they came towards him with its flamethrower in hand. Even the giant Russian Heavy seemed somewhat fearful of the Pyro. And Spy, one of the most sensible on the team (apart from himself, he had to admit), having dealt with the BLU Pyro, privately admitted to Dell that he was sure there was something wrong with the Pyro, and that he would have to be careful around it. Dell, therefore, left the Pyro be. Fed it, gave it space, but simply left it to its own devices, never questioning it (he'd only get odd gestures and muffled sounds in response), never allowing it near weapons when not in battle, as he'd been asked, and never, above all, ever trying to remove the mask. He had to admit it, even he was terrified of what might be under there. A week before Christmas, they were given a special mission. Both the REDs and the BLUs were to compete to deliver a suitcase filled with Australium to a rocket, to launch the monkey Poopy Joe in to space. It sure sounded ridiculous, but when the Pyro heard of it, they clapped their hands in glee, preparing their flamethrower for attack. It was cute, almost childish in a way. Like the Pyro really was some sort of small child, instead of a mercenary. Mission commenced, and Pyro escorted him out to the rocket, where he found himself a nice spot to set up a sentry and dispenser. Soon as that was done, Pyro sped off to fight for the Australium, along with their team's Scout, Soldier, Heavy, Medic, and no doubt Spy. Sniper had set himself up on a rooftop, and Demoman...well, Dell was sure the Demoman was doing something useful. Probably brandishing a sword at the opposition. "Don't go touching that Australium, now!" Dell found himself calling after the Pyro, an odd showing of joviality on the battlefield. Perhaps it was the mission, and the fact that it was so close to Christmas. "Don't want no moustache growin' through that mask of yours!" Pyro, surprisingly, chuckled and threw Dell a thumbs-up, before disappearing. "Times like these and you could almost get used to it," Dell chuckled to himself, giving his sentry a good whack with his wrench. Percussive maintenance. Somehow, it worked. Dell never questioned it. It was something he'd been taught since he was a boy. The clank of metal on metal almost drowned out the Administrator's messages that the intelligence had been picked up. "Well," Dell muttered to his sentry. "Time to show us what yer made of." He gave the sentry an affectionate pat, before looking up and around. He could hear, in the distance, sounds of battle. The Soldier's war scream, the Heavy's yells, the Scout's boasting. What he failed to hear, however, was the uncloak of the Spy behind him. "Not so tough without your leetle friend, pardner?" the Frenchman whispered, imitating the Texan's southern drawl as he disabled first the sentry, and then the dispenser. "Spah!" cried Dell, hoping that the battle was drawing close enough to hear. "Spah's sappin' mah sentry!" As it was, Dell whirled around, wrench at the ready. Close quarters combat didn't warrant a change to his shotgun, and he hoped that his sentry, in particular, would survive long enough for him to disable the Spy before he fixed it. Never turn your back on a Spy. Rule one of combat. Dell lunged forward with his wrench, but the Spy gashed his arm with the knife, causing Dell to give a short cry of pain. Still, he wasn't the type to quit so easily, and he quickly regained his balance, hitting the spy neatly with his wrench. "Mmmrph!" Right on cue, as the Spy slashed Dell's other arm and pushed the short Texan to the ground, a burst of flames appeared, followed by - who else? - the RED Pyro. "Oh. I appear to have burst in to flames." And with that, the Spy crumpled, weakened by the fight with the RED Engineer. Dell whirled around, working to save and heal his sentry. He got there just in time - the dispenser wasn't so lucky, but that was easily replaced. Sentries, to him, were almost like children. At the very least, they were beautiful creations, and it hurt him to see them destroyed. "Mmmrph mmrph! Hummmmm," The Pyro raised its flamethrower above its head in a small declaration of victory, before pulling out its fireaxe and pretending to play the guitar. As a guitar player himself, the Engineer had to laugh. "Yer a real funny one, ain't 'cha?" Pyro chuckled, before looking down and away, a little...was that sadness? Dell hadn't expected to see emotions perceptable on his charge. "SCREAMIN' EAGLES!" Uh, oh. No time for contemplation, Dell reminded himself. They had a battle to fight. ~ It was a narrow victory for RED team - BLU got close to the launch too many times to count, and if it weren't for their massive team effort right at the end, Dell doubted they could've done it. Of course, it may well have all been in vain, as the rocket crashed soon after launch, with Poopy Joe the monkeynaut going down in flames. The RED Soldier got a little teary at this, whereas the Pyro didn't seem to understand. Medic merely sighed at the hysterics displayed by the unhinged veteran, and left them all to themselves for the evening. Even this close to Christmas, they still had battles to fight daily. ~ Evenings didn't always mean relaxation for the Texan. He had to put his numerous PhDs to use, after all, and many a night he'd be staying awake working on various devices, fixing his sentries and teleporters, trying to work on more efficient dispensers...and yet here, just before Christmas, he found himself relaxing by his fireplace, book in hand. Every year, his mother had read him the Story of Australian Christmas and now, years later, although his parents were long gone (a horrible incident involving Australium, a bottle of whiskey and a husky - Dell didn't particuarly like to talk about it), he read the story all the same. It was then he noticed the Pyro, legs crossed, looking up at him (well, so he presumed), almost expectantly. Dell flinched. "Hmmrph. Mmph mo mree, mreeee?" Dell blinked in confusion, however was quickly set right by the masked person pointing at the book. "You...want me to read to you?" The Pyro nodded in assent, very eagerly too, Dell noticed. He found himself relaxing. Although this was a pyromaniac, a murderer, Dell found himself struck by the childlike behaviour of the being. Very human. Innocent, even. He hardly knew this person, he'd simply been asked to guard it, keep it shackled and under control, like it was a monster, and yet, somehow, Dell felt that maybe under there there was a simple, childish human being, who, while perhaps incredibly dangerous, just wanted a friend. There was no way he could know this, of course, but the fact that the Pyro stuck by him in battle, and the fact that they simply wanted a story seemed to set him more at ease. Instantly, he felt bad for the neglect he was heaping upon the poor thing. The team was afraid of him (or her), and yet Dell didn't really know if they had a reason to be. "Ever heard the story of Australian Christmas?" The Pyro simply shook its head, before resting its head on its (still gloved hands). Dell suppressed a chuckle. "Well, it all starts with Ol' Nick..."
would be quite interesting to know exactly how delusional this particular pyro is. Is s/he just purely imaginative, or seeing an alternative reality through the mask, yet perfectly aware, given how sadistic the laughter gets? And just how addicted to fire is s/he? What with the habitual flicking of the lighter. Basically I'm curious and want more of this.(but just in case, try not to game recap too much)
I think i'm going to keep my eye on this story. Its nice to see some hetero on here once in a while!
I really hope this gets updated soon, it can really go somewhere and I want to watch every second!
GOD DAMN IT ANON NUMBER 6 YOU FUCKING BUMPED THE THREAD YOU GODDAMN CUNT! SAGE NEXT TIME!
Okay, Seriously! Stop.Bumping.Posts! No Like! Sorry, I had to get that out of my system.
Oh my gosh I am super flattered that people actually like this and want to read it haha, I didn't think anyone would! Sorry I've been away, I haven't had much drive to write but here we go. This is kind of just a short chapter of...something. ~ The day they took Mayor Balloonicorn away was the saddest day of the Pyro's life. Balloonicorn and Pyro had been friends ever since the Pyro was a baby, and some relative had seen the plush unicorn doll that was not unlike a balloon in size. The name had stuck, and the two of them had become lifelong friends, despite the inanimate nature of one. Although the child was slow to talk, full conversations were held between Balloonicorn and the young Pyro, and the child was kept perfectly content with the company of the toy. There was no need for anyone else. Then they both discovered the magic of rainbows. The Pyro had been no more than five years old at the time, and a box of matches had been carelessly left on a bench, where the child could easily reach them, and at Balloonicorn's advice, had struck one of the matches, causing it to ignite. Although the child had seen it done before, they hadn't expected such a reaction. The fire was...well, it was beautiful. To the young pyromaniac, they only saw rainbows and sparkles. The parents, however, saw burning flesh on the hand of their child, and hastened to remove the source from their offspring. The scars only began to hurt when the Pyro forgot the beauty of the flames. When the images of rainbows and glitter began to fade...that was when they decided they needed to recreate it A match was dropped carelessly on the floor this time, as the child sat - legs crossed, elbows on knees, chin resting on palms - watching the room set ablaze. There was no fear of the burn. Only awe. And even as people began to scream, all the young Pyro could hear was laughter. Everyone sounded so happy. Why wouldn't they? Rainbows and sparkles and confetti...they made everyone happy, didn't they? It was after another one of such incidents, when the Pyro's family was gone and the small, scarred child reached for more matches, like an addict, that Mayor Balloonicorn was taken away. The six year old had screamed and cried - Mayor Balloonicorn was their only friend, they'd said, he helped make people happy with the rainbows and happiness - but it couldn't change anything. Balloonicorn was thrown away, never to be seen again. The Pyro was locked away, and only released in to society to do the things that had gotten them locked away in the first place. After all, it had been only been a year when the lady in purple had first shown up...
Oh my, that was nice. To me, the balloonicorn is way more scary than Pyro and you just prooved it. This insight in his/her twisted way of thinking sure is interesting. To imagine what that firebug is thinking while he ignites the people crossing his path.....bathing them in bliss and rainbows to have them laugh in joy. That mental image hurts.... creepsawaytodrawobsessivepyro
Is this wonderful story going to be continued or should I expect it to not?