1 . Name: Serafina Giselleblaire @ 2011-07-19 08:33

[Author's note: I was inspired to write this searing love story while travelling in the South of France. While enjoying the exotic locale, I was passionately romanced and tragically abandoned. I have no regrets; this story is dedicated to Sonne H. Melzen, my erstwhile lover. I have forgiven you, but will never forget you.]
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"Stay on point, leetle Doktor," the RED Heavy patted his Medic's ass and leered luridly as he prepared to leave. "I come back once I crush all BLU babies."

The Medic sighed deeply as he was left alone to defend the control point at KOTH_RomanticCastle. Where was the love he and his Heavy had once shared? Long ago, back in 2Fort, they had gone everywhere together. The Heavy had protected him, and their relationship had grown into something wild, untamed as a herd of stallions. Sometimes the Medic felt that he could still hear the Heavy's booming declaration- "I LOVE THIS DOKTOR!" He remembered longingly the magical night under the Harvest moon, when they had danced together. He would never forget how tenderly his lover had taken the flower of his purity. But now, left alone in this rocky land, with the lonesome desert wind sighing through his lonely hair, the Medic felt ready to weep with loneliness.

"Vhy does mein Heavy ignore me?" he cried passionately. "He cares more for zat gun, zat schtupid Sascha, zhen he does for me! He did not even notice I am vearing my finest, most sumptuous low-cut red silk gown! He does not care zat it matches perfectly both my gloves and my Medigun!"

"He's a fool," came a rough, manly voice from behind a rock outcrop. "You are as lovely as the sunrise, and have you done something different with your hair?"

"Eek! squealed the Medic. He was surprised because he had thought he was all alone. "I thought I was alone! Who is there?!"

"It is I," said the BLU Soldier, striding manfully out from behind the rock.

"Stay back!" the Medic raised his syringe gun in one trembling hand. "I'm not afraid to use this!"

"Clearly, you are," the Soldier laughed pityingly. "You're far too delicate for the battlefield; you're too good for this place."

"Flatter me if you want, I won't let you cap this point!" The Medic stamped his dainty foot.

"I admit," the BLU hung his head, "that was my original objective. But you're so radiantly beautiful, I've lost all will for violence. Just let me look at you, and I can die happy." He set down his shotgun.

"You... you can't mean it," the Medic said as he lowered his syringe gun.

"I do mean it; you are the loveliest man I've ever seen." The Soldier wrenched open his shirt, showing off his hard, muscular (curiously hairless and oily) chest. "Shoot me if you must! I love you so, I would die for you!"

"Oh!" the Medic sighed, putting down his weapon and clasping his hands to his bosom. "Do you mean it? It has been so long since I have been loved!"

"I do love you! Kiss me, and let me prove it!"

"Don't try to cap my point," the Medic said, clinging to the last vestiges of propriety.

"I won't, I swear it!" The Soldier took the Medic in his arms, somehow gazing lovingly down into the eyes of someone a good six inches taller than him.

"Kiss me, you dummkopf!" the Medic cried. The Soldier's firm, manly body was hard against his own firm, manly body.

They kissed, and their passion was like a white-hot crit rocket. It was wonderful- too good to be true. The Medic swooned backward, one hand tragically pressed to his forehead.

"No, I mustn't!" he protested.

"Why not? I love you! That means everything is perfect!" The Soldier showed the depth of his affection by not ending the sentence with "maggot" like usual.

"But I am promised to mein Heavy!"

"You said yourself, he never tells you that he loves you! I have intel that confirms he only cares about that gun! Forget that Commie, and know the love of a real American man!"

"Oh!" The Medic's heart fluttered at the thought of knowing the Soldier's love, knowing it deep inside him, knowing every hard, throbbing inch of the American's love... "I cannot!" he wept. He was an independent man, a vital member of his team. He had never succumbed to any man, until his Heavy had swept him off his feet with his smouldering gaze and borscht-fuelled muscles.

"I must have you!" The Soldier seized the Medic, ripping the bodice that had suddenly appeared on the Medic's previously flowing gown.

"Nein, nein... oh, ja!" The Medic melted as the Soldier pressed fiery kisses to his full, voluptuous pectorals.

Full of manly urges, the Soldier threw the medic down upon the control point. The Medic shivered in manly modesty and desire. "I will take you!" the Soldier cried, pushing the Medic's skirt up his shapely legs, revealing his sock garters.

"Nein, nein..." the Medic struggled with himself again, weighing his independence against his need to be loved, truly deeply loved deep inside his most secret regions, by a real man. "Oh, ja!"

The Soldier took the Medic in a perfect moment that was like flowers blooming and the sun rising and angels singing and basically like anything other than sudden anal sex without benefit of lubrication. Their union was timeless, perfect bliss, indescribable in a way that expressed both the purity of their passion and the author's lack of imagination. When they reached the height of their bliss, the Medic cried out, "Oh, mein Soldier, I love you!"

"Ha ha!" laughed the Soldier. "I do not love you!"

"But, you swore you did!"

"I lied!" The treacherous BLU shoved the helpless, disheveled RED off the point. "In case you forgot, we are at war! All's fair in love and war! Sun Tzu said that! so you're screwed either way!" He laughed again.

"Oh... oh vhat have I done?" the Medic sobbed, sitting in the dirt beside the point. "I have lost the point, betrayed my team and my true love!"

Just then, the Heavy's booming voice sounded across the mountaintops. "You are all DEAD!"

"Mein Heavy, please forgive me!" the Medic whimpered as his betrayed lover returned, spraying the area with two hundred dollar hand-tooled bullets.

"Not you, Doktor!" the Heavy chortled as he turned the Soldier into something that resembled airborne tomato soup. "Just BLU babies!"

"Oh, Heavy," the Medic wept. "He tricked me! He told me he loved me; he capped both the point und my virtue." He hung his head in shame. "Can you ever forgive me?"

"I forgive you, Doktor," the Heavy said, tenderly wrapping his muscular arms around the Medic's slender frame. "I will always forgive you, because I love you."

"Oh..." Still sticky from his bout with the Soldier, the medic pressed against the Heavy. "You've been so distant, I was no longer sure!"

"I am sorry, so sorry," the Heavy shed a manly tear. "Was working extra hard, to buy you... this." He pulled a tiny velvet box from his bandolier, and fell to one knee. "Doktor, will you marry me?"

"Yes, oh, mein Heavy, yes!" the Medic wept (more) with bliss. "You vill alvays be King of mein hill."