Reposting this repost of a repost since y'all lost everything. Originally written by OwlTiem. Because of character limits, this has to be broken into 2 parts, jsyk. -------- NotTim Six nails. There are six nails in the underside of the kitchen table, and a wooden bracket at each corner to keep it straight. At some point, someone has dropped a cigarette on the table cloth and turned it over to hide the scar, so it hangs down on the left if he sits with his feet towards the sink (and who would burn a tablecloth and just hide it? That's not right. Someone will find it and blame him, because he smokes so much, but it wasn't him. It's not his tablecloth to burn.) In the middle is a no man's land where he can scrunch himself up, arms around his knees, and be almost sure of no feet brushing him which might give away the secret - unless Sniper sits in the middle and leans back in his chair, which has only happened once. (He was trembling for hours after that, curling up in Engineer's room, lighting one cigarette off the end of the last.) All Sniper did was huff and refurl his knees, giving nothing away (which is why it's so stupid that he got so scared, so fucking stupid.) The first time he ended up under there was only a day or so after defecting, sneaking into the kitchen in the dead of night to peel a thin strip of glaze off of Soldier's apple pie (he knows it's wrong, very wrong, it's stealing and it's a bad idea and they might even throw him out; but it tastes so good and he'd only ever take the tiniest bit, just for the sweetness) only to be interrupted by Demo and Pyro (punishment for the crime, no doubt.) Of course he wasn't seen, but spent an hour under the table, listening to Demo curse and bitch and Pyro snigger and mutter. It's a good place to hide if surprised in the kitchen, it's a reliable place at least; but it's not very easy to escape from unnoticed (always have an escape plan. ALWAYS have an escape plan.) It was five people this time, too many to deal with coming in all at once, and too many to slip past cloaked (so of course the best course of action is to get under the table like a child; idiot, fucking idiot.) From under the table, he can hear them all talking (which is sort of like Spying on them, but he doesn't mean it - it's not his fault they come in so suddenly and scare him under there.) People talk about such strange and trivial things. The weather, the food. Their aches and pains, their annoyances. Each other. Him, sometimes (and he really hates that, even though they're usually nice and don't call him Tim, at least.) It's unfair, the way they get to talk about such meaningless stuff and he can barely ask the time of day without making an idiot out of himself. For a while, the world consists of nothing but shoes and muffled conversation (the most shameful thing is that he sort of likes the world like that. He feels included, and merde, that's the stupidest thing he's thought all day.) There's four pairs of boots around him, and striped socks wandering the kitchen (Medic sat behind him, which is bearable, Heavy to the left and Pyro in front of him and oh god, Engineer to his right. Is that a good thing? Engineer is safe, but hiding under a table is embarrassing.) Heavy is bickering with Scout about food; his voice rumbles in the wood and makes a cobweb dance in front of Spy's head. There are always cobwebs under and behind things, people never think about these places when they dust, if they dust. Twisting the delicate fluff onto a finger and crumbling it away feels like a small service to his team mates. Who else, after all, is going to do this? (Maybe one day someone will drop something and look under the table, or something will slip down the back of a filing cabinet. Maybe he'll overhear someone talking about how clean it is in all the forgotten spaces and know that it's appreciated. Maybe he should just stop thinking all together. Maybe sitting under a table makes you stupid.) Medic laughs (and Medic's laugh always worries him a little bit) and Pyro's boots quiver; Heavy's foot kicks out in annoyance and he reflexively scoots right (and oh, no, Engineer sitting there is not a good thing at all; did he accidentally touch the man's knee?) Above him everyone is laughing (do they know he's there?) Heavy's irritation fleeting or feigned (No, they can't know. How would they know? Even if he had touched Engineer's knee, it would just seem like Heavy had tapped him under the table perhaps, although Heavy's legs are rather short.) Scout has sat down next to Pyro now, leaning back on his chair dangerously far; Medic is telling him a horror story about an early case of his involving a man who swung too far on his chair and fell on a spike. Medic always seemed to have treated someone who'd injured themselves on any given household object, and all his stories ended in punctured lungs and broken bones, impromptu tracheotomies and skewered eyeballs.
A light touch on his shoulder and he nearly jumps out of his skin (fuck, fuck, fuck, he's stammering in his head now because Engineer's gloveless hand is reached out towards him under the table which means he knows, oh god he KNOWS.) He can't shift away because then he might hit Heavy, or Medic, or anyone else and that would be infinitely worse (he couldn't move even if he could move, because he can't even breathe, digging his nails into his legs through the leather and fabric.) All he can do is stare at the casually out-stretched hand (is that...?) A sugar cube. Now he really feels like a child, or maybe a dog. A stray dog, a bloody feral cat or a wild horse or something, only one that sits under tables and hides like a fool from his own team mates (just one idiotic thought after another today, isn't it?) He won't take it, (but he would like it,) but he WON'T take it because that make things worse, and besides, maybe Engineer only thinks he's there, maybe if he doesn't take it then Engineer will think he was wrong, and take it away (but it is so very tempting; there was only four cubes left in the box that morning and four is too few to take one, someone would notice.) The conversation over his head has moved on to the late arrival of the post the last few times, difficulties in communication with HQ. Engineer is joining in, which means no one else knows he is under here (of course they don't. Engineer wouldn't give him away. Engineer is safe. Engineer is safe and offering him a lump of sugar. Perhaps he should take it, then he could sit nearer Engineer's legs and be sure no one else would touch him.) The hand doesn't move at all as he lifts it, as lightly and quickly as possible, and slips his hand over his face even though no one can see him here and laugh at him for sucking on sugar cubes (but some habits are so deeply ingrained they feel like part of him.) When it does move once more, reaching out to brush against his arm, he still freezes up but not so badly (he can breathe, at least, he was half expecting it this time) and yet he lets himself be gently tugged sideways, arranged by tiny nudges so he is leaning against Engineer's legs, a thumb gently stroking the back of his neck (and slowly he unwinds, bit by bit, till he's resting his head on Engineer's knee and the thumb has worked its way under the balaclava to brush the edge of his hair.) Time, and another lump of sugar, passes his way, till the others meander off. He's not even sure when they leave, or left because suddenly there's no more chatting, just Engineer lifting up the table cloth to look at him (did he fall asleep under here? That's almost as embarrassing as being under the table in the first place.) "You can come out now, y'silly lil' Spook" There's no mockery in that voice, but Spy still feels his face redden under the balaclava. Climbing out is uncomfortable - his legs have drifted off, whether or not the rest of him did - it's too bright all of a sudden and he blinks (only making him look more dishevelled, godammit.) Engineer helps him, strong arms settling him on his feet (he wants to run away, but he doesn't want to; he wants Engineer to maybe hug him, but he can't ask, he can't even talk, especially not right now. What if Engineer is sick of always having to calm him down?) Warm hands are on his shoulders, pulling him closer (not so close he can't get away though.) Engineer leans down a little, pulls the balaclava up with the same care Spy has seen him employ so many times on his mechanical creations. '"Son, if you didn't hide all the time, you wouldn't end up stuck like this. This is your kitchen as much as anyone else's, you know that." Spy can only nod, not trusting his treacherous tongue not to make a mess out of replying, but he knows he's not being honest and Engineer evidently knows it too; he sighs, smiles, and presses a kiss to Spy's forehead (he doesn't flinch away, either, which fills him with a quiet pride.) "Come on then," Engineer takes him by the edge of the hand, steers more than leads him toward the door. "Let's git out of here." "Engineer?" The word is choked, but understandable. "Yes Spah?" "Th-thanks." He smiles, very slightly, shyly, not daring to look directly at his companion, but the grin on Engineer's face shines in the corner of his eye. END
Actually this was written by Fennec (Fennic?), I believe. Owl did another NotTim, but this one is definitely Fennec's.
How am I not familiar with NotTim? This is lovely. Sad and pretty. I wanna read Owl's now, if this was Fennec's. (N.B. Would like to mention that I freaked out majorly when I found the site being all EVERYTHING IS GONE and FORMAT IS SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT but I am a bit aspie sometimes so I suppose it was only to be expected. Obvious solution: awesome people write more fics, fill up empty board. I should be Tsar of the World or something. My ideas are the best)
I feel like such a newfag. (Oh wait I am) What is NotTim and where can I get my fix?
>>3 Okay so I decided I needed more NotTim and turned to Google as something of a last resort All I found was this fic and I made the same face that I would make if the Doctor invited everyone I know except me for a trip in the TARDIS. But apparently it's by this person, originally: http://aralil.livejournal.com/3091.html#cutid1 I don't know if aralil is someone else on the chan, or simply a user I'm unfamiliar with. But apparently the above link is the original posting.
Here, have the originating log: Nachte: DUDE Nachte: I HAD THIS SPY TODAY Nachte: would would come into the intel room Nachte: and sap my gun Nachte: and then Nachte: STAND THERE Nachte: and I'd just look at him Nachte: beat my sapper off Nachte: and wrench smack him Nachte: he did it like 5 times! owl tiem: i'm picturing like owl tiem: you know a little kid will break a rule owl tiem: and then stand there to see if you noticed Nachte: EXACTLY Nachte: It started getting hilarious Nachte: and then THEN Nachte: one time Nachte: he tried it backwards Nachte: and instead stabbed me from the front Nachte: and let the gun kill him owl tiem: haha owl tiem: HE JUST WANTED YOUR ATTENTION~~! Nachte: and all I can see is engineer just standing there like ". . .-scratch head, nudge corpse with boot-" owl tiem: this is just a very amusing mental image. owl tiem: all HAY U SEE WOT I DID Nachte: isn't it? owl tiem: yep *wrenchface* Nachte: after a while I'd just laugh when he showed up Nachte: and he'd Nachte: like one time Nachte: he SAT THERE Nachte: as an engineer Nachte: the entire time I build my stuff Nachte: all the way from when I laided my despenser till I had lvl 3 gun Nachte: then he decloaked and ran at me with the knife Nachte: and the gun killed him. owl tiem: see now i'm interpreting this as HE JUST WANTED TO BE FREIDNS owl tiem: he was just too shy to chit-chat Nachte: XD Nachte: blu spy Nachte: has a crush on red engy Nachte: but sapping all he knows how to do :< small talk wasn't in 101 owl tiem: it's sad really owl tiem: all sitting owl tiem: watching you building owl tiem: admiring the technique and the strong masculine arms and the jaw of science etc owl tiem: thinking "lord what do i SAY - " Nachte: and then I turn and look at him Nachte: and he panics Nachte: and instinct accidently kicks in Nachte: and he rushes Nachte: and gets shot. owl tiem: it is a targedy. Nachte: nah Nachte: he wakes up in the medic bay Nachte: and just sighs Nachte: and stares at the ceiling Nachte: then sneaks all the way back in owl tiem: and saps something and then stands there with his hands behind his back waiting for you to notice ????: awww ????: poor little spy :[ Nachte: and the wrench cracks the sapper off ????: he just wants to be noticed ;_; Nachte: and I pause for a moment, look the guy in the eyes Nachte: and then crash the wrench back down in his face Nachte: and again he wakes up in the medic bay Nachte: and stares at the ceiling Nachte: and trys to figure out what hes doing WRONG owl tiem: well obviously he just hasn't sapped hard enough so he'd better do that five more times or something... owl tiem: same ending owl tiem: every time owl tiem: WHEN WILL THIS FARCE CEASE Nachte: XD hahaha Nachte: hes not a bad spy he thinks Nachte: he makes it down to intel every time alive! Nachte: thats no easy accomplishment owl tiem: but then he gets all flustered because THE ENGINEER IS THERE OH GOD WHAT DO I SAY DOES MY HAIR LOOK - YOU CAN'T SEE MY HAIR NEVERMIND Nachte: AHAHA XD Nachte: but Nachte: but one time! Nachte: he sneaks in Nachte: and engineer is at the intel desk, leaning back in the chair with his boots on the table Nachte: and his hats tipped down, his sentry beeping softly. Nachte: And spy halts, his heart in his throat. Nachte: Slowly, oh so slowly, he walks over to engineer and leans over him. owl tiem: leans down to press a gentle kiss to - OH GOD HE WOKE UP WRENCH TO FACE? Nachte: The strong man is sleeping, spy holds back his breath twice and leans so close to feel the other's breath. Nachte: He nearly jumps out of his skin, spy does, when he feels a rubbered glove on the back of his neck. Nachte: Shoved into a violent kiss, he drops his knife. Nachte: LOL GOOD END
owl tiem: i got way too much entertainment out of the miniplot that your shitty spy gave us nachte owl tiem: he just wnats attention Nachte: XD Nachte: hes probably a younger spy Nachte: maybe..20 Nachte: 21 Nachte: and engi is like..early 30s Nachte: and spys just infatuated owl tiem: *snerk* i just imagined retard spy there standing around watching engineer just WATCHING him and he thinks he is cloaked and he is not. Nachte: and engineer Nachte: just lets him Nachte: pretends hes not there Nachte: after all its not like the spys a challenge Nachte: let him watch Nachte: he moves funny and the gun'll shoot'em owl tiem: he feels like the world's biggest dumbass when he realizes though owl tiem: engineer all amused tolerance up until the moment he tries something, because really, that's the only way you can react to this guy owl tiem: he's not worth actually worrying about, he's not a threat to anything. Nachte: exactly Nachte: and one day Nachte: engineer just starts talking to him Nachte: doesn't expect a reply or anything Nachte: just something to break the silence. Nachte: talks about trigometry or something Nachte: like physics or about how a gun needs to be assembled. owl tiem: explaining the scientific principles behind the gun's targeting mechanism. Nachte: ahaha yeah Nachte: and spy just listens Nachte: absorbs it all Nachte: AND THEN Nachte: THEN ONEDAY Nachte: spy is sitting there in cloak owl tiem: ACTUALLY cloaked this time Nachte: engineer knows hes there but ignores it owl tiem: he checked ^^; Nachte: and engy ends up fighting off a soldier Nachte: but his gun takes a hit Nachte: and he reaches for his tool box Nachte: and spy is already there Nachte: handing him the Nachte: get this Nachte: correct parts and tools owl tiem: ! Nachte: and engineer is in minor shock and just stands there with his hands half out reached. Nachte: so spy doesn't say anything and just sidesteps him and starts fixing it Nachte: and engineer can't even move hes in such shock owl tiem: hilarious end: spy fixes it and stands up all SEE WHAT I DID and it shoots him Nachte: -choke- AHAHAHA Nachte: cute end: it shoots him and engineer panics and shuts it up and ends up patching him up, all flustered gunfag entered chat. owl tiem: i am just cracking up at this mental image of spy fixing it and I FIXED IT FOR Y- bang - drop to floor - tiny voice "ow" owl tiem: the tiny voice "ow" is a necessity for added humour owl tiem: "see i was paying attention" Nachte: XD owl tiem: the blus are pretty sure they got a short-bus spy D: [SoWP] ????? ?????: X3 [SoWP] ????? ?????: "Boo! Send him back to the store!" [SoWP] ????? ?????: "We don't want 'im." owl tiem: he gets to the intel room but then he just SITS THERE STARING AT THE ENGINEER. which of course they don't know that's what's going on 'cause they're not down there with him but they know he disappears for hours and comes back with nothing to show for it but a wrench-shaped depression in his forehead owl tiem: CAN WE GET A TRADE-IN owl tiem: THE COMICAL MISADVENTURES OF A SPY THEY CALL TIM Nachte: XD owl tiem: (i don't know why they call him tim, it just seemed appropriate) Karmabot: hahaha awww spy called tim :c that's strikingly cute. owl tiem: I FIXED I---ow Nachte: too cute Nachte: and then Nachte: engineer is finally sold Karmabot: Oh yeah :c owl tiem: he'd better be owl tiem: after that Karmabot: Spy shows up again (after waking up in the medical bay again) smiling see see did you see i did it :D owl tiem: i just picture blu talking about him behind his back. "where'd tim wander off to?" "hell if i know, but he'll be back in sick bay before too long." "dammit, tim." Nachte: XD Nachte: and then.. Karmabot: Meanwhile, Tim is actually a goddamn sneaking genius. He's just smitten. :c Nachte: one day he doesn't show up Nachte: again. Nachte: well he does Nachte: to put a knife into the backs of those slimey backtalkers owl tiem: he must be 'cause he manages to get DOWN there, right? so he can't SUCK. he just gets all ga-ga-eyed. Nachte: yeah Nachte: I figure hes fucking amazing Nachte: but hes so far smitten Nachte: it all just goes out the window Nachte: engineer thinks hes a damn retard Nachte: until..spy fixes the gun Karmabot: And then Engineer actually /looks/ at him, and realizes that he's not stupid at all. ????: TIM? owl tiem: his name isn't actually tim owl tiem: his team calls him tim Karmabot: Engy just calls him spy, really. ????: hurr owl tiem: because they think he's short-bus. owl tiem: *he* doesn't call himself tim. Nachte: nope Karmabot: and, as mentioned, he's a damn ghost when it comes to sneaking. A real spook. owl tiem: if you call me tim one more time you will be SHIVVED. owl tiem: SHIVVED. Karmabot: hey, tim, calm down! D: owl tiem: so obviously he eventually turncoats. his team keeps calling him tim D: and they think he's short bus D: Karmabot: RED doesn't even know there's a spy, honestly. v(._.)v Karmabot: wait blu has a spy? Karmabot: had. he's ours now. Karmabot: so...where is he? :V Karmabot: ... ... Karmabot: v(._.)v i dunno where he went. Nachte: Engi: hes in their base. -grunt- Nachte: how do you know? Nachte: Engi: cause I do, does it matter? Karmabot: well actually yes it does. owl tiem: HAHA HEY TIM YOU BEEN GONE AWHILE YOU GET WRENCHED AGA-*shiv* Karmabot: Well, we'll give him a talk-over when he gets back then. <(._.). owl tiem: they hear him muttering something about being called tim before they see him. Karmabot: Cleaning his knife. owl tiem: short bus /indeed/ Karmabot: Engy sticks up for nottim. owl tiem: at least the reds don't know about the tim thing. he is free from being called short bus tim ever again. Nachte: yup owl tiem: since the reds didn't know he EXISTED Nachte: this is with the frame Nachte: that red didn't have a spy Nachte: and blue did Nachte: now red has the spy Nachte: and blu doesn't know anybetter Karmabot: until it is too late >:3 owl tiem: spy is still perfectly happy to stand in a corner and listen to engineer talk about his machines and stuff and not respond. he is not much for chit-chat under any circumstances. Karmabot: He /has/ progressed to nodding or shaking his head. He is very much not a talker, nottim is. owl tiem: MEBBE HE'S MUTE. Karmabot: No, no, he can talk! Karmabot: I DID IT- ow D; owl tiem: oh right duh Karmabot: He's just very terribly shy <:3c Nachte: engineer Nachte: tops Nachte: in that relationship Karmabot: Oh yes. Nachte: but its ..nice sex Karmabot: Spy's just too shy to take the lead in anything. :V owl tiem: he's like one of those emo boys who sits on the bus and sighs while watching the person he has a crush on and writes songs about it and doesn't actually make a move until/unless the person comes and sits in his lap and makes him Karmabot: And then he's all babbling and omgomgomgomg :V Nachte: ahahaha Karmabot: OMG HE LIKES ME BACK? owl tiem: i imagine the "talk-over" being extremely taciturn on his part too. just "used to be." "not anymore." Karmabot: "no tricks. RED now." Nachte: oh no Nachte: hes a fucking genius Nachte: he'd walk'em in circles Nachte: casually Nachte: and they'd think he just like..slipped and accidently stabbed the guy Nachte: and he keeps them ALL in the dark Nachte: killing them off all Nachte: one by one Nachte: and making them believe red did it Nachte: or just siphoning huge amounts of information Nachte: and they're clueless about it Nachte: red thinks hes a fucking godsend Nachte: they love him owl tiem: tim's too stupid to do anything like that, 'cause he's shortbus. blu'd never have an inkling. owl tiem: because they wouldn't expect it of him at all. Karmabot: Engy likes him so much :< owl tiem: it wouldn't be hard for him to keep blu clueless at ALL, because they just - wouldn't even consider that it could be him, y'know? owl tiem: and so the short bus thing works in his favour. Nachte: engy fucking loves him Nachte: like at first Nachte: hes wary Nachte: and sorta..tolerates him Nachte: but when he realized the stuff hes saying makes sense Nachte: and it doesn't bore the guy Nachte: hes..its just love Nachte: thats it Karmabot: and he'll eventually return it. Karmabot: very quietly. owl tiem: he's got this youthful enthusiasm, nottim, which he is usually too shy to display, but like the SEE I DID IT - owl tiem: when he joined up he was going to try so hard and be so good but he was too shy to really hit it off right with his team and then he went head-over for red engy and started THAT train and so he became Tim to his own team and "blu has a spy?" to the reds and "stupid but mostly harmless" to engy... Karmabot: And he has the hugest, most enthusiastic smile. :c owl tiem: he was so proud of himself for fixing that sentry. he'd never touched one before, y'know. and sure, yeah, it shot him, but that just proves he fixed it right! owl tiem: could be the sneakiest motherfucker on the planet but he gets flustered :3 Karmabot: And he /is/ very sneaky. Nachte: hes amazingly sneaky owl tiem: he is not shortbus at ALL. <(-_-)> Nachte: probably graduated intelligence training bootcamp fucking top of the class Nachte: labeled genius Nachte: all these honors Nachte: and hes ko'd by love Nachte: forgot to take in the fact that hes Nachte: GAY AS SUNSHINE Karmabot: very easy. Nachte: and engineer is FUCKING HOT owl tiem: AND smart. Karmabot: dangerous combination. Nachte: yes Karmabot: Not to mention patient. owl tiem: i like how at first he was sapping shit and just forgetting to leave or something, and eventually he stopped even making an attempt at legitimately being there, until he was just - hanging out. owl tiem: he is much more with the sneaky than the suave lying-to-your-face sort of espionage just because he's awfully shy. but he's so kickass with the sneaky that itmakes up for it.
Karmabot: Short Bus Tim is awesome. owl tiem: "hay tim's back HAY TIM YOU'RE RUNNIN LATE DIDJA MISS THE SHORT BUS" *glare of doom* "lookin pretty good tim no wrench marks this time" *glaaaaaaaaaaare* Karmabot: (BACKSTAB) owl tiem: (soon's he turns around. SHIVVINGS) Karmabot: :< *looks like he tripped and fell on my knife* Nachte: XD owl tiem: "dammit tim that WOULD happen around you :C" Nachte: got Nachte: hes my favorite Nachte: fucking character Karmabot: You know Tim doesn't talk to his BLU teammates. He speaks only in emotes to them. :V Nachte: exactly Nachte: actually Nachte: he only talks to engineer Nachte: red engineer that is Karmabot: He managed about five words to convince him he was on RED's side now. Karmabot: 'No tricks, now RED. No worries.' owl tiem: perhaps owl tiem: with a slight stutter. Karmabot: And delays because he has to work up the nerve to talk. owl tiem: he can do full sentences, he just has to get the nerve up, that's all. Karmabot: crippling shyness. but he is fucking amazing at not being seen. owl tiem: goes together well - not being seen and not wanting to be noticed due to shyness. he's a natural genius at it, the training just refined it. Nachte: hajsdhkajhf I love him so much Nachte: hes gotta look young Nachte: like him and scout could still be in the age bracket together owl tiem: yeah Karmabot: oh yes. He's naturally sneaky. He does it in his new home, even. Nachte: XD Karmabot: No one's really certain where he sleeps. They're /pretty sure/ he's sleeping in base, anyway. Nachte: reds more family than blu Nachte: he sleeps with engineer Nachte: but nobody fucking KNOWS THAT Karmabot: he also has a seperate room for his things. somewhere. B( Nachte: because they never catch him Nachte: leaving Nachte: or coming Karmabot: he has a terrible tendancy to just...APPEAR. behind you. Karmabot: He's always terribly apologetic, even sometimes mumbling out a s-sorry. Nachte: d'awwwww Karmabot: He doesn't /mean/ to! D: Karmabot: He showed up to one planning meeting, and all but had a panic attack when he was introduced to the team. :V owl tiem: eventually he gets to where he's got some nerve and he starts to say something of more than six words to engineer (when they are alone together of course) but engy makes the mistake of looking at him in a way that makes not-tim suddenly aware that he's talking and he just thinks "oh god am i rambling? oh geez" and clams back up :C Karmabot: And also 'Oh he's /looking/ at me omgomg' owl tiem: and he's such a LITTLE. bebbie shy spy. owl tiem: (anyone younger than me = bebbie) Karmabot: He's like what happens when a waif grows up :V owl tiem: he's a dashboard confessional song in a pinstriped suit Karmabot: You pull off his mask and you just know his hair is best described as a mop. owl tiem: oh you know it goes over his eyes. Karmabot: Long lashes? Nachte: I Nachte: am fucking drawing this comic Karmabot: yay :D owl tiem: yaaay :D Karmabot: Soft grey eyes. Probably a little on the large, expressive side. <( ._.)v owl tiem: don't forget the emo hair. a dashboard confessional song in a pinstriped suit would have emo hair Nachte: no no Nachte: its Nachte: short Nachte: messy but short Nachte: like stops maybe half and inch past his hairline Nachte: just enough to get matted and moppy Nachte: but short enough to not show up under the balaclava Karmabot: Oh yeah. owl tiem: yeah Nachte: its also a dusty dusty brown Karmabot: I saw it as classic emo black. But actually shiny and healthy. :V owl tiem: grey eyes for def Karmabot: Soft ones. He's like smoke. He's downright insubstantial sometimes. Karmabot: He also has a sweet tooth. (He's pocketed sugarcubes from RED's base before he joined.) owl tiem: mm sugarcubes. owl tiem: eating sugar is so loud :( it goes cronch cronch :( Nachte: he sucks on suger Karmabot: He sucks on them like candy. He's quiet. :c Nachte: pops one in his mouth Nachte: and lets it dissolve owl tiem: ohhhh shy little nottim sneaking around with a sugarcube in his mouth <3 Karmabot: Maybe humming a little tune to himself when it's safe. Nachte: on the subject of wounds Nachte: engineer needs a sixth sense Nachte: about shyspy Nachte: a scene Nachte: where shyspy gets hurt Nachte: and suddenly the red base errupts Nachte: and like demo is trying to hold engineer from running out of the base Nachte: and away from his sentry nest Karmabot: And Engy's like noooo he's hurt D: Nachte: and they won't let engineer go to him Nachte: because engineer is the only one who can fix the sentrys Nachte: and guard NOT tetra: :(( NOT tetra: nooo Nachte: and they send soldier and pyro to get him Nachte: and engineer and fliping the FUCK OUT Nachte: he gets angry Nachte: and quiet Nachte: and he walks into the whiteboard room Nachte: thats beside the intel Nachte: and starts writing equations Nachte: huge ones Nachte: like they take up the whole room Karmabot: To keep from thinking about poor Shy Spy. Nachte: and scouts like "whats that shit" Nachte: and engineer is like "its the equation for the probablilty of spy's survival." NOT tetra: awww :( owl tiem: DDDDDDDDDD: owl tiem: calling him "shy spy" makes me imagine him sitting hugging his knees and wearing a shyguy mask Karmabot: I keep seeing a little Spy in a shyguy mask. owl tiem: is tim ZOMG EMO BROKEN or was he just made that way Karmabot: I think he's always been shy, and maybe school made it worse. He has a stutter, and you know what shitheads kids are. Karmabot: And after it hit a certain point, Tim just started in on a mean vicious cycle of reinforcement. :c owl tiem: yeah :( Karmabot: But he can recite perfectly, without a stutter. That happens irl, for the record ( ._.)./ owl tiem: re:recitation:yep Nachte: he has a photographic memory Karmabot: Eidetic. Nachte: he doesn't have to steal documents Nachte: he just reads them and then leaves Karmabot: Right. Karmabot: He also takes in every little thing Engy rambles about perfectly, because his memory's that good. :c owl tiem: he fixed that sentry, you know! SEE I ...ow Nachte: XD hahaha Nachte: he was trying to say Nachte: SEE I LISTEN owl tiem: YES [THEN IN ANOTHER WINDOW] Karmabot: I'm stuck on spook lil' spy. :V owl tiem: YES SO CUTE owl tiem: he & engy will never get anywhere though :C he would freak out. Karmabot: He would go /so slowly/ owl tiem: first kiss nottim's heart pounding like a terrified rabbit's Karmabot: Engy ssh ssh sshing, reasurring him. Karmabot: He's a spooked dog, and if there's one thing engineer is king at, it's being reasurring. owl tiem: it's DO WANT but it's coming out as NOT SURE IF WANT and he's so *nervous* he's never /done this/ before what if he messes something up and oh god this is - it isn't awful at all it's just - Karmabot: And then that kiss disrupts his thoughts. Karmabot: And Engy's all 'See, it's not that bad. :3' owl tiem: wolthyme: he'd sit there for hours just petting nottim's hair, i bet Karmabot: Because it's a nice safe way of showing affection and it keeps him from freaking. Karmabot: Maybe eventually working down to massage his neck and shoulder. It's relaxing. owl tiem: it's nice when engy's talking so it's not quiet and he doesn't feel like he ought to be talking himself. Karmabot: So he can't feel the quiet pressing in on himself. Sitting next to Engy on the floor, leaning onto him, eyes closed, maybe a quiet mm-hmm as he talks on about...whatever. owl tiem: he's paying attention, of course. he walks away with a better memory of everything engy said than your average college kid does walking out of a lecture they took notes on. Karmabot: engineer doesn't know the /extent/ of how much spy retains until spy does something like manually reload and repair his sentry while engy's out fixing up his dispensah heah owl tiem: eidetic memory owl tiem: intelligence gathering and sneakiness yes. suavity no. but he doesn't NEED the latter because he's got the former. owl tiem: intel reports he can make without stammering because they're not him talking they're BUSINESS. Karmabot: He's just reciting memory! Karmabot: Sitting quietly next to Engineer, listening, making little mh-mm noises (or are they just mmhs of contentment by now?) as Engineer quietly runs his fingers through Nottim's hair, occasionally giving his neck a short little massage-squeeze, letting himself rattle on about maths. Karmabot: you are now imagining it. owl tiem: i am. owl tiem: it's so adorable :3 owl tiem: wolthyme: it would be even emoer wolthyme: if he killed the scout wolthyme: and then went to engy with blood on his hands wolthyme: and that's how he ended up switching teams owl tiem: she always has the emoest ideas owl tiem: we tried to outemo each other once and just ended up depressed
Karmabot: and he'd feel bad more because he /doesn't/ feel bad enough about killing scout like that :c owl tiem: scout was the asshole frat boy to his shy emo boy. only he just happens to be a shy emo boy who has been carefully trained in how to stab people to death, and we know how good he is at remembering his training. owl tiem: but yeah definitely feeling bad 'cause he doesn't feel worse Karmabot: Probably just telling Engy /why/ he's joined up. (Engineer probably quietly explains it to the head of the team; probably a medic :V) owl tiem: metaphorical blood on his hands *i* should say. ick leaving handprints places otherwise. Karmabot: He'd very quietly freak and wash his hands; maybe even ditch the gloves completely and grab his gloves. Karmabot: spare set of* owl tiem: that was the irrevocable moment. it's not like he hadn't been thinking about it on some level but up until he actually killed one of his - supposed to be teammates owl tiem: well, there's that decision made and can't be unmade Karmabot: Packing everything he has into his little valise and running full tilt to RED as fast as he can because he's so fucking scared he'll be caught and oh god no no no no no Karmabot: by the time he gets down to engineer he's that side of a panic attack and he's just hyperventilating and shaking and- owl tiem: and he has no idea what he's going to say and he'll have to say SOMETHING he'll have to EXPLAIN Karmabot: They're going to CATCH him they're going to make him EXPLAIN what he did no no no no please no don't no talking, please. D: owl tiem: eyes like saucers, both hands holding on to the handle of his bag so hard you'd half expect it to split, MAJOR FREAKOUTS. owl tiem: and he doesn't - know - what - he's going to do Karmabot: Engineer of course has no idea what's happen but it must be bad if he's like this, so he turns the comforting up to eleven. owl tiem: i k-k- --- i w-w-w-wa -- *gulp, pause* i'm RED now. Karmabot: Do what? Spy, what happened? *He's got his hands on Spy's shoulders, ssh, ssh, I've got you.* owl tiem: I k-killed him. Sc-out. owl tiem: They're g-gonna - *looks up in renewed panic and can't finish the sentence* Karmabot: He finally went too far, didn't he? Ssh, you can stay. They're not going to get you, son. I promise. Ain't no one gonna get down here without me lettin'm in. *A gentle squeeze. Calm down. He'd hug poor Nottim if he knew the poor thing wouldn't have a heart attack.* owl tiem: *Gives up on even trying to talk - if he can't get his /thoughts/ in order the words won't even make it past the first consonant, he knows this. Still nervous - big eyes, trying to breathe - but he's not going into panic attack mode anymore. Just nods - yes, I hear you.* Karmabot: There, see? Just don't forget that. I'll go talk to the boys upstairs and make'm let you in. You're a great Spy, son. They'll be thrilled. *Focus on the /good/, lil' Spy. It'll be okay! I promise! Engineer would never lie to you. Feel the calm. He keeps holding Spy at arm's length, but that's only because he just knows any sudden movements, much less a hug might make him worse.* owl tiem: *Another nod. Engineer will talk for him, that'll be good. And if they let him stay - but if they don't - no, they will, Engineer will talk to them, they'll let him, they'll /have/ to because there's nothing else he can /do/ - /breathe/. Breathe. He said they would and he said he was a good spy (he said he was a good spy!) and /breathe/... When Engineer goes upstairs he parks himself in a corner with his arms wrapped around his bag. (he said he was a good spy!)* Karmabot: 'so uh, guys, I picked us up a new recruit :V' owl tiem: yeah that's gonna be a fun conversation haha owl tiem: considering they were unaware of the existence of a spy in the first place Karmabot: 'No, I'm serious. A lil' Spy. Yeah, I know you've never seen him. He's shy.' owl tiem: the longer he's up there the more the poor kid has convinced himself he's going to end up getting shot like a dog; he's just debating whether the reds'll shoot him for being a blu spy or the blus'll shoot him for killing the scout. owl tiem: and it's not like he could go anywhere else to hide... Karmabot: And Engineer's trying to convince them all that no, seriously, there's a Spy, he's a sweety, and also he is scared stiff. :C Karmabot: Probably pull Medic down with him because he figures Medic's the least scary :V owl tiem: haha, he doesn't work well when he's flustered - imagining he's fussing with his watch when FINALLY engineer comes back but O SHIT HE'S NOT ALONE and just this startled little "!!" noise and he hits the cloak button. only then he immediately realizes they SAW him and they KNOW he's there and that was STUPID and he very shamefacedly uncloaks with his face COMPLETELY red. like, blushing in parts that the balaclava doesn't cover, even. and sits there all red-faced in the dissipating smoke. Karmabot: And Engy's actually 'awwing' out loud at that aww. AWW. D: Poor thing! (and Medic's just shocked. SO THERE IS A SPY :V) Karmabot: And of course Medic tries to talk to poor Nottim. "Well then, so there is a Spy. And why the suddon change of heart?" owl tiem: O.O *engineer HALP* owl tiem: If he'd planned this he'd have had a speech prepared and practiced until he could say it. Karmabot: *ahem.* He had a mite bit of a run in with his team. They pushed him a lil' too far, and right over the edge. He'd rather stay here, and I can't blame'm. :c Karmabot: (He probably has it in his pocket. :V And /tries/ to say it but it comes out stammers oh you're so STUPID and BAD D: ) owl tiem: ends up passing it over for them to read instead Karmabot: Ashamed and blushing and one step away from downright teary hysterics. owl tiem: eyes on toes Karmabot: Possibly sniffing. owl tiem: shoulders so tense he's shaking. Karmabot: Medic adjusting his little specs while reading the sheet. Karmabot: Engineer this far away from just saying 'THE POOR THING JUST WANTS TO STAY D:' owl tiem: Why is it taking him so long to read that, it's not that long, oh God, he IS gonna - I'm gonna be - oh God - owl tiem: please please please no owl tiem: starting to hyperventilate again. Karmabot: And then after ETERNITY, Medic looks over his specs at Spy, a little tired (but all Medics are a little tired) but friendly, and just nods his head. "You can stay." Incidentally, that was a fantastic little almost-speech there.
wolthyme: engy, why aren't we having shy-spy in here, instead of through relay? owl tiem: continuing a conversation already in progress in two separate IM windows with two separate people: Medic saying Nottim can stay is like deflating a balloon. Just oh thank GOD thank GOD thank GOD. wolthyme: does he fall to his knees owl tiem: WE NOW RETURN YOU TO "THE SHYEST LIL' SPY," ALREADY IN PROGRESS ON NBC wolthyme: "oh - oh. I -" wolthyme: and crying Karmabot: <( ._.)v i dunno so owl tiem: He manages a "Thank you." owl tiem: WITHOUT owl tiem: stutering. Karmabot: Engineer gives Medic one of those big slaps on the back YAAAAAAY. :V You know the kind. And then turns his attention to helping spy. (He figures Medic can handle telling everone else. : Karmabot: :V* wolthyme: but "thank you" is very very very quiet. owl tiem: little mouse voice. owl tiem: by the time medic's left he's just had way too much emotion for one night and he just wants to sit DOWN wolthyme: he's already on his knees wolthyme: does engy go to his side and pet his side and shhh him? owl tiem: i disagree with your crying thing ftr wolthyme: okay. owl tiem: he /won't/ cry in front of people he /won't/. owl tiem: D: owl tiem: it's bad enough he's stupid and he can't talk he's not going to /cry/ too. DDDD: wolthyme: awww wolthyme: shyspy needs SO MANY HUGS Karmabot: he does D: Karmabot: but he might freak out so bad because oh god he might be trying to hurt him (nevermind that he KNOWS better :( ) Karmabot: Also yes he does. Karmabot: He does so very much kneel down with him and ssh ssh ssh no it's okay :c owl tiem: he's like a half-tamed animal. like an alley cat or something. you have to be cautious how you approach him so you don't scare him off. owl tiem: some members of the team go for like two weeks knowing that they have a spy now but never seeing him with their own eyes. wolthyme: only two weeks? owl tiem: he's not keeping sneaky on purpose. Karmabot: He's just shy. D: owl tiem: eventually they'd catch a brief glimpse of him in a hallway or getting himself a sugar cube out of the kitchen or something. Karmabot: Because Nottim also has a terrible sweet tooth. wolthyme: haha Engy takes to keeping caramels in his pockets. Karmabot: (He takes exceptional care of his teeth, for the record :c ) wolthyme: brushes his teeth 5 times a day? Karmabot: AT LEAST once after every meal. :c owl tiem: The first time he goes back in to BLU base he overhears someone saying "Tim" and stops to listen, which is how he discovers that somehow - God only knows how, it must be because they assume he's shortbus - nobody suspects anything of him, they don't know who shivved the Scout, and they're joking about how he must've missed the bus again because they haven't seen him in a while. Karmabot: brb Karmabot: And Engy explains very carefully to his team that you just have to be careful with nottim the poor thing's barely held together by bootstraps and chewin' gum. :c wolthyme: so do they think he's dead, or just - spying long term? owl tiem: well, having learned *that* owl tiem: he decides to REALLY double-agent. as long as he can. owl tiem: sleeps in RED base, though. Karmabot: Medic is like I read about this in a medical journal once! :D SEE LIKE THIS SEE *medical jourals!* wolthyme: in engy's room? Karmabot: Yes. :c Karmabot: At first on the floor, and he'd sneak in after he fell asleep and out before he woke up. Because he's like that. :V owl tiem: but since the blus don't suspect anything when they see him (and they *do* see him, because *they* don't know he's that sneaky, aye, he's shortbus) he's just merrily funneling information along. (he can recite things he's read or overheard - that doesn't make him stammer, the way his own words do. actual thing that happens.) Karmabot: He's also gentle as a lamb. Sure, he can backstab with merry aplomb, he IS a Spy after all, but he's got a feather-light touch. :c owl tiem: and aww climbin up in the bed Karmabot: Eventually. owl tiem: blanket and pillow on the floor in a corner owl tiem: where he can see the door by cracking one eye Karmabot: back against a wall. wolthyme: I would think Karmabot: He never has his back to a door or window or anything :c owl tiem: nope wolthyme: he would wait until engy started pulling him into the bed owl tiem: and he sleeps really lightly. Karmabot: Engy's often torn between wanting to pull Nottim on ahead and not wanting to force the poor thing. wolthyme: at first he pulls him in platonically Karmabot: Because of a nightmare, maybe? wolthyme: just holding him, you know owl tiem: yeah wolthyme: and then gentle kisses owl tiem: wakes up straight as a ramrod and hyperventilating again Karmabot: platonic ones. the kind you get when you're scared and aww, no, son, I've got you, sssh. :C wolthyme: and then it - changes Karmabot: Slowly (Borderline glacially :V). Because Engineer never wants to spook Nottim. It'd take forever to get back that trust. Karmabot: That would just break Engineer's warmfuzzyheart. :c owl tiem: Holding him close and petting his hair and rubbing his back as he lets himself relax, although he's still got a pulse like a nervous jackrabbit. wolthyme: A gentle kiss on the forehead. Then the nose. Then the Spy swallows hard, shaking, and the Engineer's lips touch so so lightly on the other man's, just the barest brief brush - Karmabot: A-and... that wasn't that bad? No, not really. Not bad at all. Nice, really. Yeah. (Even if he was still shocked) Karmabot: (Heaven help Scout or someone when they slap Nottim on the back for a job well done. :V ) owl tiem: ("DON'T!" *shock - he talks? and he's disproportionately upset.* "Huh?" "D-don't, okay?") Karmabot: (Or he even just lets out a little scream that he chokes down and... runs away. Vanishes off, but you can hear his shoes pounding against the ground.) owl tiem: (Would depend entirely, I suppose, on how early on it was and how much he'd adjusted. Footsteps echoing away and just CONFUSION behind him what the hell did i do) owl tiem: (nut) owl tiem: (bar) Karmabot: (And poor thing's holed up in Engy's room trying to remember how to breathe D: ) owl tiem: (and beating himself up for the whole thing because this is stupid he's stupid he didn't mean anything it was ok don't be so STUPID now they're gonna think you're crazy) Karmabot: (Crying. A little. Because it's all just too much D: ) owl tiem: engy go fix him D: owl tiem: engineers are for fixing things D: Karmabot: Engy would hear about that new nutbar Spy getting spooked and go looking for him. :V Karmabot: Down in the intel room? Nope. Supply room? Nope. The Room That Is Technically Nottim's? No. His room, then? owl tiem: bingo wolthyme: or Medic. Medic has a sweet spot for him - not the same as Engy's at ALL - after seeing the kid practically fall apart in front of him owl tiem: heh, plus he's an Interesting Case. Karmabot: Medic also sees in Nottim a completely fascinating (in a professional sense) case of social phobias. wolthyme: while it's possible that medication would help, at least a little tiny bit, it's also equally possible that the Spy would be afraid to take it Karmabot: Not to mention the difficulty of procuring such medication. wolthyme: yes. owl tiem: spies smoke. this is like snipers wearing silly hats, right? nottim smokes like a goddamn chimney when he's trying to calm his nerves but the nicotine doesn't actually help. owl tiem: shaking hands having to flick the lighter four times, coughing on the first draw because he inhaled wrong owl tiem: because he's still hyperventilating owl tiem: hunched up hugging his knees in a corner of engy's room with the lights out, just a little red point of light from the cigarette. Karmabot: He does it because it's a ritual he can do. Karmabot: It's a place he can funnel his nervous energy. owl tiem: Yeah. Karmabot: But Engineer finds him eventually. And consoles him best he can. He's no medical professional. He's just a problem solver. wolthyme: i can see them having a lot of post-trauma sex. once they start, you know. owl tiem: Engineer makes him feel better just /being there/. He trusts him and he feels better when he's there. wolthyme: shhh, shh, it's okay, shh, i've got you, i'm here, spy trying to get as close to engy as he can, like he can hide inside engy's skin Karmabot: And he makes him feel better /about himself/, which is the important thing. wolthyme: soothing turns into light kisses turns into frantic hungry kisses - owl tiem: huddled up against his side. takes a while to be comfortable with hugs. Karmabot: takes a while to be comfortable with /touch/. He's not used to being touched affectionately. He's probably an orphan. :c owl tiem: hugs're hard 'cause you can't get OUT of 'em. Karmabot: He starts with the dudely single arm wrapped around his shoulders kind. Where you're sitting next to eachother. You know what I mean.
owl tiem: i could see him being an orphanage kid so he didn't have ANYBODY. owl tiem: because you grow up in a group home, you don't get the individual attention, and you're constantly surrounded by other kids also all wanting attention Karmabot: Yep. owl tiem: and he's so quiet and shy and stammery - he'd always be in the back wolthyme: the kind of kid that gets touched twice a day, when your diaper gets changed? Karmabot: And he was probably a short kid until he hit puberty and shot up like a weed. :V owl tiem: he's probably hardwired for the shyness and would've been a quiet kid if he'd had a perfect childhood wolthyme: and he doesn't act out, so he doesn't get attention there, either Karmabot: Because acting out is bad D: Karmabot: And that stutter's gotten him on the recieving end of some asshole kids being little shits. :( owl tiem: they must've gotten stropped when they acted up in the orphanage - even if he never got in trouble himself, he knew You Don't Do That D: - got that sort of primal fear of doing something Bad instilled in him so deeply he still freaks out about it Karmabot: Even if what, exactly is Bad is ill-defined. Karmabot: add and remove commas as desired* owl tiem: yeah Karmabot: Generalized Anxiety is like :h5: wats up owl tiem: it's on like a subconscious level of his psyche. Karmabot: And he's naturally just timid and defers very easily. He went to school and joined clubs because he was told (in reality, they were suggested to him by a well-meaning teacher) to. Karmabot: Engineer starts requesting extra sugarcubes from RED. owl tiem: he'll never take one if the box looks like it's getting empty even if there's another box somewhere owl tiem: he doesn't want to take the last one owl tiem: it will sit there with five cubes in it for three days and then someone will find that box and make coffee and open the new one Karmabot: He doesn't want to be a bother D: Karmabot: (Eventually Engy takes a box and writes 'Spy' on there with a sharpie see these are yours take as many as you want. Even the last one.) Karmabot: Pyro and Spy eventually become somewhatfriends when Pyro offers him one of his books. (For the third time. He ran away the first two times.) owl tiem: (If Engy's not watching to see when that box empties he'll just not have any sugar for a while.) Karmabot: (that sugar that is not in his box is Not His. It's not for him D: ) owl tiem: (Exactly. Now he has his own specified sugar which means that only his sugar is His. Before it was just General Sugar but now it is His and Not His and and and ) Karmabot: (and he just wants a sugar cube but he's /out/ now.) owl tiem: oh my gee i just imagined pyro and spy having Book Club. But they'd have to like write little book reports and trade them XD Karmabot: (this probably ends eventually in sniffles. He gets worked up so easily over the littlest thing.) wolthyme: engy has caramels in his pockets! Karmabot: And Pyro would be just fine with that. Spy seems like a pretty okay chap after all. a little scared, yes, but a pretty okay chap. Karmabot: But those are engy's! He can't just GO OVER THERE and ASK D: owl tiem: use of "chap" = pyro is now Bertie Wooster in a chemsuit wolthyme: LOL Karmabot: lol ol owl tiem: oh i say pip pip have a spot of fire old bean wolthyme: but wolthyme: but wolthyme: Engy keeps them there wolthyme: FOR spy. wolthyme: like Karmabot: that doesn't matter! They're in his pockets! they're /NOT HIS/. wolthyme: sugarcubes in your pocket when you have horses Karmabot: but they aren't the horses' sugar. D: he can't go bother engineer he has so much work to do owl tiem: he can't just go BUG him Karmabot: like I said: Ends in sniffles. owl tiem: rather frustrating sometimes since he won't/can't just tell you what's the matter. Karmabot: And he can't really articulate why he can't just take a cube from the other box because he's all stammery so he ends up making gestures and trying his hardest not to make any undignified noises when Medic comes in for his usual cuppa joe. wolthyme: lol wolthyme: he goes and sits and stares at Engy with big sad eyes owl tiem: he is much of the time Effectively Mute. Karmabot: He's getting better with Engineer, and he's starting to try and talk to Medic, if only because he is a Doctor and Trying To Help (also he has lollipops and those are nice) owl tiem: the whole nervous > stammering > nervous > stammering loop gets him badly :-/ wolthyme: "Is something wrong, Spy?" "N-no! O-of course n-not!" owl tiem: (he likes the red ones best but he takes any colour he is handed) Karmabot: (Even the gross green ones.) owl tiem: and i am still ttly giggling over the idea of Book Club. Karmabot: And he can't really read and learn how to stop stammering, because then he's just reciting and he can DO THAT it's so frustrating. owl tiem: sitting at the kitchen table with the book and a piece of paper and a pen, "whatcha doin?" "b-book club." Karmabot: (tucking the little reports under eachother's door. Taking over an unused whiteboard for their conversations.) owl tiem: the kitchen is Usually An Okay Place To Be because it's not very busy owl tiem: most of the time Karmabot: And people in there are busy eating or cooking or waiting for their coffee. Karmabot: they don't notice him, which is good, but they're also in there with him so he's not alone, which is also good. owl tiem: scout was all woo another kid my age we can be pals and shit but he's too boisterous for spy really Karmabot: He overwhelms Spy. owl tiem: cloud of overwhelming scoutiness Karmabot: But he tries, right? Scout's nice! Nervous little smiles and following along, see, he's not /that/ bad. And Scout doesn't need him to answer his questions (he answers them himself :V) wolthyme: scout overwhelms MOST PEOPLE. ALWAYS. Karmabot: and maybe being around scout will be good for him? be a little more like scout? Melphaligal entered chat. wolthyme: newscout, you mean? wolthyme: instead of oldscout. timscout. owl tiem: he killed the blu one dear owl tiem: he's on red now owl tiem: completely different scout wolthyme: yes. wolthyme: TIMSCOUT IS DEAD. owl tiem: scout will ttly bug medic for lollipops Karmabot: much less like THOSE KIDS HE GREW UP WITH THAT MADE FUN OF HIM AND NEVER STOPPED-- *cough* wolthyme: i am apparently about a step behind you guys. and clarifying already obvious things, or something. owl tiem: and get two different colors 'n' hold 'em BOTH out so spy - gets to/has to pick. Karmabot: And poor Spy's like no no no you pick first D: Karmabot: (Gesturing, maybe a tiny 'you first'.) owl tiem: what works out wonderfully is scout likes the green ones :D wolthyme: "I-I. Y-you pick." owl tiem: "Aww c'mon I don't care just take one." Karmabot: "O-o. Um." And then he carefully maybe perhaps the red one DO YOU WANT IT ITS OKAY I'LL SWAP NO SERIOUSLY owl tiem: "AWRIGHT I GET THE GREEN ONE" Karmabot: !!! he likes the green ones? Oh, well then. Okay. And then a little smile as he fumbles with the wrapper TODAY IS A GOOD DAY. :< owl tiem: the only trouble is scout *does* have a tendency to get impatient, y'know. Karmabot: And Spy is very easily flustered. Karmabot: Spy eventually starts giving Scout his green lollipops when he gets one from Medic. :c Karmabot: (Scout will eventually have to tell Medic that he likes the red ones, man. :V) owl tiem: popping up behind him unintentionally stealthily owl tiem: SURPRISE LOLLIPOP wolthyme: scout starts calling him buddy owl tiem: HOLY SHI- oh it's just you Karmabot: They should call him Spook. :V owl tiem: hey what's up? oh hey thanks wolthyme: and spy thinks it's the best ever owl tiem: Hee, Spy wouldn't mind Spook 'cause it's not meant to be mean like SHORT BUS TIM Karmabot: Yeah. It's an okay nickname. :3 owl tiem: It's good for him to spend time with the rest of the team so he doesn't end up just hiding and then following Engy around like his puppy. Karmabot: Spy doesn't like scary things. He hates halloween because people try to sneak up and scare him and spook him and and and D; owl tiem: totally not worth the stress for trick or treating Karmabot: He's okay with the trickertreating. Becuase, yeah, FREE CANDY JUST FOR HIM and no one else just him, but the rest of it can go bleed to death in a ditch. owl tiem: if you're gonna have a free candy holiday owl tiem: easter's better. Karmabot: He would just fall over from joy at a box of candy just for him as a gift. owl tiem: nobody jumps out at you from behind a fence on easter.. owl tiem: and you don't have to go up on people's porches and knock owl tiem: to get easter candy. Melphaligal: we dont have fences in front of our yards here Melphaligal: but you get MOAR on halloween owl tiem: it's a trade-off, though Melphaligal: you get to dress up to Karmabot: And Easter's more choclatey. owl tiem: the costume might help a little Karmabot: Spy likes sugar candies. owl tiem: he's not HIM Karmabot: That's why Spy went into Spying. Disguises. he's hiding and no one can find him. :c Karmabot: I can also see him in the habit of team-disguising when he was on BLU because then no one would bother him. Karmabot: Spy has a love-hate relationship with his birthday. On one hand: gifts! cake!. On the other: attention! D: owl tiem: IDEAL: there's a party and he's not invited Melphaligal: Spy is secretly an attention whore owl tiem: haha Karmabot: He just wants to be loved D: Melphaligal: he just doesn't know that Karmabot: (even if the idea scares him :V) Karmabot: The ideal party is one where everyone carefully leaves the gifts right outside his door and the cake is more like a cupcake. with a candle. just for him. Karmabot: He's a little obsessed with the his/not his distinction. owl tiem: group home owl tiem: does that Karmabot: communal property makes him a little uncertain. D; owl tiem: there is this huge web of etiquette about the use of communal property that only he is aware of and he himself does not completely understand it. owl tiem: just this vague idea that there are Rules owl tiem: but he does not KNOW the Rules Karmabot: And no one understands that YOU HAVE TO PUT IT BACK YOU HAVE TO CLEAN IT WHY CAN'T ANYONE CLEAN IT *sob sob sob* wolthyme: he is hesitant to eat food in the refrigerator, even, without asking engy first owl tiem: even though everyone else understands owl tiem: if it doesn't have a name owl tiem: it's fair game owl tiem: (if it does, and you are scout, it's still fair game until you get caught.) wolthyme: lol whereas when he was blu, he could eat whatever he wanted. THEN it was stealing. Spy-like. Karmabot: He's broken down into tears over that coffee pot at least once because no one UNDERSTANDS you have to- YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW THE RULES D; Karmabot: And some other poor guy is like :U dude it's just a coffeepot.
owl tiem: sitting in the kitchen owl tiem: thirsty owl tiem: medic comes in owl tiem: "m-may i have some apple j-juice?" owl tiem: and it's not MEDIC's apple juice owl tiem: but he didn't want to just TAKE IT wolthyme: and OH GOD HE CAN'T ASK DEMO wolthyme: and SCOUT WOULD LAUGH AT HIM Karmabot: he has flawless etiquette. Karmabot: Scout hasn't quite gotten that Spy needs that permission. owl tiem: and medic's just like 'of course you can, that's what it's there for :?: " owl tiem: image: scout assembling a dagwood sandwich for himself out of everyone's stuff in the fridge Melphaligal: Except he has to whipe the top off first because EVERYONE DRINKS FROM THE BOTTLE! wolthyme: does medic reach out to touch him, sometimes, a comforting pat, and then sort of - stop, remembering that Spy is afraid owl tiem: and offering to make one for spy but D: THAT'S NOT HIS FOOD owl tiem: HE CAN'T JUST GO GIVING ME OTHER PEOPLE'S FOOD Karmabot: Medic's a little clued into the fact that Spy needs permission to take things so it becomes his psychology :words: owl tiem: scout knows he freaks out if he touches him but he forgets Karmabot: Spy is torn between going off and telling OH GOD SCOUT'S TAKEN YOUR FOOD D; and Scout is my Friend I should not Tell on Him D; wolthyme: awwww owl tiem: Not Snitching, i think, would win out Karmabot: He settles for pretending he never saw it. Snitches get Stitches. Melphaligal: not that everyone wouldn't know it was Scout since he takes whatever the hell he feels like owl tiem: yeah but that doesn't mean spy has to Snitch Karmabot: Spy is scared of Demo. He's loud and drunk and he might hit Spy D; (Nevermind that he wouldn't.) Melphaligal: Demo thinks Spy doens't like him Melphaligal: because Spy doesn't stay in the room when Demo is in it wolthyme: well wolthyme: he does when other people - especially engy - are in the room wolthyme: demo was the last one to see spy, once he changed teams. Melphaligal: wait why is Spy like this again? wolthyme: he's socially broken. Karmabot: Orphan, Stutter, vicious cycle reinforcing (to him) the idea that he's pretty much not a good person. :( Melphaligal: well duh but thats it? Melphaligal: awww Melphaligal: poor Spy Karmabot: Because of his stutter ( ._.)./ Nervousness makes his stutter worse, and so does being flustered, and people make fun of him for the flustering and the stuttering which makes it worse. So he just doesn't talk. The rest of it is just being a naturally timid kid in a rough orphanage situation. wolthyme: well wolthyme: being ridiculed by his own team Karmabot: that certainly didn't help. wolthyme: for his crush on red engy making him stupid -= owl tiem: which was really just like school, but - they were TEAM, it was supposed to be DIFFERENT - wolthyme: and then killing the scout - owl tiem: and they didn't know he had a crush on the engy they just thought he was stupid without knowing hwy wolthyme: yeah Karmabot: Because he would vanish for hours, and then come back with a wrenchprint in his head and no intel or anything. owl tiem: attachment issues from being an orphan combined with being natural timid and then all of the other shit just heaped up and now he is a mess of social phobias. Karmabot: But now, now he's coming out of his shell. A little. Book club with Pyro and running buddying with Scout help a lot. :c owl tiem: BLU doesn't even miss him 'cause they never saw him much anyway. and he goes back sometimes (LOOKS LIKE TIM CAUGHT THE BUS AGAIN) for Spyan. owl tiem: so they have NO CULE. owl tiem: no clue, either. wolthyme: lol Karmabot: No matter what, he's never going to be a big talker. Because of that stutter. He thinks he sounds stupid. :c owl tiem: he really, really hates going back because especially now that he's got a REAL team being called Tim just pisses him off SO MUCH. owl tiem: but it's what he does. owl tiem: so he has to do it. Karmabot: And he has to act Timlike, not the new, less broken Spook he is, so he can't even do anything. Karmabot: (it is a nice reminder of how much better he is now, he has to admit) owl tiem: he's always in a bad mood when he comes back though. FRUSTRATED. wolthyme: he's not really THAT MUCH less broken though wolthyme: he's less flinchy around people he's getting used to Karmabot: But for HIM, it is a huge improvement. :V wolthyme: none of which are Blu team wolthyme: lol but Blu would not notice. owl tiem: goes back and makes his speech and consoles himself with sugarcubes and cigarettes Karmabot: And sitting with Engineer as he fusses over his Dispenser (heah) wolthyme: just sitting with Engy helps. wolthyme: *pets shyspy* owl tiem: and that day when he *fixes* the dispenser 'cause engy couldn't get to it he is SO PROUD OF HIMSELF you know. Karmabot: Strutting (in his own small way) around the base, smiling (to himself, but) and writing Pyro a postscript in his report that night re: repairing. wolthyme: lol wolthyme: awww owl tiem: "D-did you see?" to Engy Karmabot: And he would nod slowly, "Yep. You did /excellent/ on those repairs, Spy." and pat him affectionately. owl tiem: :] wolthyme: of course Spy is shy about pdas, so even that makes him blush Karmabot: Aww, look at that smile. "I thought the way you got the gear assembly on track was particularly brilliant." wolthyme: "t-thank you." wolthyme: ducking his head owl tiem: He wasn't SURE he'd be able to do it but he could HEAR Engy explaining how it worked so it was just exactly like he was being walked through it. Karmabot: Because, yes, eidetic memory. owl tiem: He knew he had the memory like that but he doesn't really put it into THAT kind of practice. Karmabot: He's never /told/ anyone, really, that he can remember stuff like that. Medic only just now gave him a name for it after he heard him recite a page back to him flawlessly. wolthyme: or did he lose his report and recite it anyway, without the paper wolthyme: blushing all the while Karmabot: Of course he didn't have the paper. owl tiem: he never brings any papers with him back from the base wolthyme: the REPORT owl tiem: what report wolthyme: that he wrote wolthyme: i don't know shut up i'm tired owl tiem: he writes book reports for pyro. spyan is just readin'n'memorizin' their secret crap. owl tiem: or overhearin''n'ditto. Karmabot: He did it once when Pyro explained that he'd lost his report sorry sp- *RECITE'D AT* ... ... :O Karmabot: 'Do that again ( ._.)-' '... .-.?' '(/._.)/ The report!' '...!! *okay. :D RECITE*' '... :O. *runs off to get Medic.*' '... (._.)' owl tiem: what what what'd i do wolthyme: he's terrified wolthyme: that he's got a brain tumor wolthyme: or something owl tiem: haha wolthyme: that he's going to DIE Karmabot: D; OH GOD I'M A FREAK Karmabot: And then Medic's pretty slackjawed at that recite too, because reallt Spy has a nice voice <:3c owl tiem: recites it again for medic and even though he's visibly flustered he can still play flawless recitan gaems wolthyme: haha wolthyme: the tenth or so time wolthyme: he starts to falter owl tiem: and well yeah he's a freak but it's the good kind of freak. it's GIFTED. Karmabot: And medic's like goddamn man this shit is amazing do you remember anything else? and spy's like <:| what do you mean 'do you remember' i remember everything' (but he probably had to write that down) and medic's like ... everything? Karmabot: 'everything, yes.' 'WELL HOT DAMN (note: translated from Medicese) THAT'S AMAZING' '... <:| what?' owl tiem: ends up readin a paper about it and telling engy "ap-ap-apparently i h-have an Eidetic Memory [quotes explanation from paper]" wolthyme: ahhahahaha i like the idea of the medic saying "goddamn man this shit is amazing" Karmabot: In german. owl tiem: yes imagine medic saying that word for word wolthyme: no wolthyme: not in german Karmabot: no you're right wolthyme: just in english Karmabot: it's funnier tht way wolthyme: GODDAMN MAN THIS SHIT IS AMAZING wolthyme: it conjures images of a medic wolthyme: who is a complete stoner surfer dood Karmabot: And he's not sure if this is good? but the paper thinks so? And they're doctors so they know things? owl tiem: it is one thing to know (because it is obvious) that yes you have a better memory than most people but another to know (a) how MUCH better yours is and (b) it has a goddamn Medical Name wolthyme: that that shit is, indeed, amazing Karmabot: And that (c) People don't even remember anything? They can't even remember what they ate yesterday? <:| wolthyme: lol Karmabot: everything, not anything* Karmabot: It's kinda embarassing <:|c owl tiem: engy is of course reassuring that Yes It Is A Good Thing Karmabot: Well yes, but <:|c i'm not special why do i have this wolthyme: hahaha now i have this image wolthyme: of engy coaxing him wolthyme: to recite the events wolthyme: of the first time they made love. Karmabot: it was probably awkward and timid :V owl tiem: that is most embarrassing thing Karmabot: <:|c I didn't even really think about people not remembering everything. owl tiem: ahaha he would be best boyfriend ever never forget an anniversary and remember that you once mentioned offhand that you liked X thing so he always has the perfect present Karmabot: Even if he is so shy he would probably hand you the box and run off to hide and maybe he will like it? I should keep watch. Invisibly. :c owl tiem: engy knows he's there and says aww it's perfect thank you spy into the apparent nothing Karmabot: Who is basically *CLAPCLAPYAAAAAAAAAAAY* on the inside. wolthyme: lol wolthyme: doing a very shy invisible squee. owl tiem: and that grin that nobody ever gets to see. Karmabot: becausebecause look he likes it. Karmabot: Engy saw it once. /once/. When he fixed that sentry the first time. owl tiem: right before he got SHOT Karmabot: ...well. Karmabot: yes. Melphaligal: haha owl tiem: poor kid owl tiem: the sentry was Test One of Can I Do This From Memory which the answer was Yes but the Dispenser was Test Two Which Really Proves It owl tiem: ...so what happened after he got shot owl tiem: i mean owl tiem: he was shot Karmabot: he fell over bleeding Karmabot: :V Melphaligal: Blood everywhere! owl tiem: ahaha owl tiem: "....ow" Melphaligal: suddenly blood. everwhere owl tiem: into the floor Melphaligal: OH NO WILL MEDIC MAKE IT IN TIME?! Melphaligal: No Karmabot: He passed out and Engineer probably dragged him to BLU base (leaving out the back door so no one would be like 'SO ENGY NICE SPY IN YOUR ARMS THERE' and doing a ring and ditch :V Melphaligal: no he will not Karmabot: ding dong ditch ( ._.)* owl tiem: haha Melphaligal: I played that owl tiem: oh here's your spy Melphaligal: some kids tried to do that to me Melphaligal: but I heard them run off and I chased after them yelling owl tiem: "i don't know if this is better or worse 'n' a flaming bag of dog shit, honestly." Melphaligal: they didn't do it again owl tiem: "MEEDIIIIIIC TIM CAUGHT THE SHORT BUS AGAIN" wolthyme: i don't know. i bet spy'd grin like that after he gave engy his first blowjob. and then engy'd have to smother him with kisses. owl tiem: haha I HAVE SUCCESSFULY COMPLETED A SEX ACT owl tiem: :D Karmabot: AND I DID NOT CHOKE wolthyme: lol Karmabot: :< Melphaligal: SUDDENLY PORN! wolthyme: no he - *he* made engy happy. Melphaligal: GO GO GO! wolthyme: engy made those noises for *him* Karmabot: he did it all on his own :c Karmabot: and that was all for him and only him. D: wolthyme: C: Melphaligal: damn romance... Karmabot: And then of course reciprocation which was, while the fact that his body basically ran off on its own without his permission is a little frightening, it DID feel, um. nice. c: owl tiem: i can see them doing it for the first time before he was even comfortable with hugs or anything. nightmare -> engy's bed -> circumstances made things feel ok that he would've been freaked out about under different circumstances Karmabot: plus maybe feeling a little obligated to do SOMETHING he can't just sleep in his bed because he's a scaredy cat. D: owl tiem: pushing himself some Karmabot: swallowing hard (lol) and working up the nerve because he needs to do this he needs to make up for being a scared idiot. owl tiem: it won't be that bad come on don't be stupid this is /engineer/ it'll be fine you'll be fine Karmabot: ( He didn't really expect reciprocation :V ) wolthyme: but he couldn't say anything but "oh! oh - oh! OH!" Karmabot: Maybe Yes or No. Or directions. Left. Right. owl tiem: (Engineer wasn't expecting it in the first place! :V ) wolthyme: "Oh - oh God. y-yes!" Karmabot: Maybe even a 'More, please!' in the middle of it all (immediently followed by an apology) owl tiem: engineer pulling back to go "shh, it's alright" before getting back to work, one hand soothingly stroking up spy's side Karmabot: Shivering, shaking, maybe even wriggling. Little noises punctuated by 'Oh!' and 'Yes!', one hand tangled up in the sheets and the other one sort at the back of Engy's head because seriously arms are all awkward when you're doing this sort of thing. wolthyme: lol yes Karmabot: because you don't want to push their head down, you know? but you WANT to. wolthyme: that would be Rude, anyhow. Karmabot: which is Bad.
Karmabot: I still can't seem to get away from the image of him finally breaking down over that fucking coffeepot and no one understands how important it is so he has to stomp off nearly hysterical and he just wants to crawl in a hole and die you're an idiot, spy. :c owl tiem: awww wolthyme: he hides in engy's bed. under all the covers. Karmabot: sniffling Karmabot: trying to STOP sniffling but you know that never works. wolthyme: "do you want to talk about it?" "n-no." "do you want me to go away?" "no!" owl tiem: it's so good that engy's so patient because it's HARD. Karmabot: And he can't EXPLAIN it; he can't talk and he can't put the words together to explain just why that coffeepot is so fucking important. wolthyme: IT JUST IS wolthyme: i-i'm sorry. Karmabot: No one cleans it and he has to clean it and why won't anyone ever clean it you have to clean it it's Not Fair for me to have to always clean it D; owl tiem: MAKE A ROTA, SPY owl tiem: MAKE A COFFEEPOT ROTA owl tiem: AND TAPE IT TO THE COFFEEPOT owl tiem: *coffeemaker Karmabot: But he can't even get the word 'clean' out so he can't explain it and that would be so rude he can't even comprehend that D; Karmabot: He's the new guy! New guys can't do that1 owl tiem: there SHOULD BE a rota but he can't be the Rota Initiator wolthyme: n-no one e-ever CLEANS IT! wolthyme: and he's sniffling again wolthyme: and engy rubs soothing circles on his back Karmabot: And Engy's got an inkling of just what is wrong but lord, son it's just a coffeepot :V (He doesn't SAY that, of course, but.) wolthyme: "no one cleans what, Spy?" "t-the COFFEEPOT!" owl tiem: heh, i imagine he gets out the "n-no one e-ever CLEANS IT" but he hasn't elucidated that it's the COFFEEPOT owl tiem: heh and then he gets stuck on the C owl tiem: trying to say coffeepot. Karmabot: And it's not FAIR D; owl tiem: and he CANT GET PAST IT because THE CYCLE HAS BEGUN so he can't frickin say coffeepot and he's stupid and it's not fair none of it's fair why can't they just clean it owl tiem: so he doesn't have to EXPLAIN owl tiem: if they would just CLEAN IT this wouldn't even be an ISSUE Karmabot: And he can't say it because he's so STUPID and THIS IS STUPID And now engineer's going to LAUGH AT HIM and think he is also STUPID D: owl tiem: just choking on the consonant until it's half sobbing and he makes himself stop Karmabot: Because it's just too much and he seriously wants to crawl and hide and just shrivel up and die because clearly he is too stupid to live. wolthyme: "t-the c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-c-" wolthyme: awww owl tiem: poor spy Karmabot: And Engineer's sitting there next to him and trying to get him to calm down, ssh, ssh. I know no one cleans it (and I don't and that's just not right), and we'll get right on it. I promise. Ssh. Karmabot: pretty mucj. wolthyme: he doesn't know what it IS Karmabot: And then the next morning there is a very carefully printed sign taped onto the machine reminding people to clean the pot out please. Karmabot: underlined. Karmabot: three times. owl tiem: even as reclusive as Tim always is, someone on blu would have to eventually start to be suspicious because he's NEVER there now. owl tiem: the fact that tim is (a) never visible anyway and (b) shortbus would, yeah, probably keep him pretty safe owl tiem: but you'd think eventually somebody'd wonder SOMETHING wolthyme: well wolthyme: he IS a spy. owl tiem: but owl tiem: but it makes for drama Karmabot: their pyro would SUSPECT, because he is a pyro and pyros are a suspicious lot Karmabot: Spook's weapon of choice is his knife; he doesn't like the loud noise or the bang etc. of the gun. Not to mention the whole thing gives him away. No, better to just slip in and put the knife in the back. Jones: Which makes future friendship with RED's Scout a bit awkward. Every once in a while he might see BLU Scout's face when he looks at RED Scout and go D: "Whassa matter?" "S-s-saw..." "Don't worry, about it, man." "...Ok-k-kay."
owl tiem: It was just too much too much /too much/ and he didn't even really realize he was going to do it until he was, until he /had/. Then - blood on his hands, blood on his suit, a suit that was still blue itself, and he couldn't just stand there he couldn't he'd be caught. He'd be caught and what would they /do/ to him what had he just /done/ there was more blood than he'd expected and what was he going to do now? Karmabot: Hide the body, and run. Karmabot: drag the body to a closet, clean the blood as quickly as he could, and run. no time to pack, no time for anything else, just run run run, run to the safest place you can think of. owl tiem: Anyway, yes, run, just /run/. He knows the way in and down as well as he knows his own (is it still it isn't anymore is it) base Karmabot: don't get seen, you're still wearing blu Karmabot: but then again not being seen is easy as breathing owl tiem: Not being seen - as easy as breathing if not easier sometimes (he's going to hyperventilate as soon as he stops running long enough). Jones: And the safest place - the only place that feels safe enough anymore is RED's intel room. Guarded by well-kept sentries. Nobody in BLU would be crazy enough to chase him all the way into the dragon's den. Even if he had just- he ran faster. The air rushing past him helped whisk the scent of blood away. Karmabot: And there he was, like always. Engineer had one of the sentries' cases off, and he was wrist-deep in machinery, humming something tuneless but comforting while fine-tuning the machinery. But the other one was active, and Engineer was armed. Good, good, no one would come down here. It was safe here. He didn't see the Spy, nor hear him, nor detect him in any way, also like usual. When he wanted to be, the little shy spy was all but a ghost. (A real spook, accoring to Engineer.) owl tiem: He pressed himself into the far corner and slid slowly down the wall, until he was curled up, hugging his knees, shaking. He was safe here, he was safe for now, but he didn't know what he'd do next and he wanted to light up a cigarette and he still had blood on his suit and he felt sort of like he wanted to be sick. Jones: Spy rocked himself back and forth as he watched his friend tune the Sentry. The scent of blood surrounded him in a suffocating bubble, thick and rusty and terrible. Engineer's humming was the only thing that cut through the stench and the memory. Spy slid out a cigarette from his case and put it in his mouth, not lighting it, just to hold on to it. His grey eyes fixed on Engineer's work. It looked like he could use a hand, and that socket wrench was too far away for him to reach. Without realizing what he was doing, Spy was already there, wrench in hand for when Engineer needed it. Karmabot: Engineer still didn't notice Spy. Well, until he reached for the offered wrench. "Thank you, Sp- Spy? What're- oh lord, Spy, what did you /do/?!" His face was somewhere between horror and concern, goggle-covered eyes taking in the sight of Spy and his blood-splattered suit. Did he just cut down one of his RED teammates? A BLU? Just what did he /do/? Jones: ". . ." Spy's mouth moved and sound couldn't come out but he was dumb-struck. He took a step back, terrified of the expression on Engineer's face. That look was the painful truth - with Spy standing there covered in blood and shaking all over. "B-b-b-llll-lu sc-c-c-c he... I- th-th-ey're g-g-g" Spy's words fell away into a choked sob and he took another two steps away, his back now pressed against the wall. He pressed himself flat against it, letting the wall keep him from falling to his knees. Karmabot: Engineer takes two steps forward, trying to make sense of what he'd just said- he knew the kid had a stutter, it wasn't his fault, really- and keep him from freaking out more. "BLU Scout? What he'd do? Ssh, shh, Spy, no one's going to get down here, not unless I want them to, you know that." He plunks the wrench down on the desk next to them, see, look. Unarmed. Not gonna hurt you. "Just calm down, Spy. Sssh. Take a breath. See, like me. Ssshh." Slow, deep breath. One, two, three. owl tiem: Breathe, yes, breathe, but he has to /explain/, and that gets him going again, and he can't stop shaking - no, no, no, breathe /breathe/ find words it wasn't one of Engineer's people he can't think that or it'll be all wrong he's already done something so /bad/ he can't let it seem /worse/ breathe and think and /explain/ need to explain what he did why he did it and what comes out is "M-my name's not T-t-tim - " Jones: Spy stays pressed against the wall, fingers clawing at the wall wishing he could sink into it and never be seen again. His chest rises and falls and he seems to calm down a bit - or at least he seems a bit less likely to fall to pieces right then and there. He turns away, swallowing and trying to slow everything down. He looks Engineer in the eye. Then his eyes flit away. He just can't keep looking him in the eye, "K-k-killed-d h-hi-him. My n-n--ame-" The words come out very quiet. Spy holds his hand to his head as the room spins. Karmabot: Okay, well, that explained that. Yes, killing siomeone over a name seemed a bit much, but poor little spooky thing's not exactly healthy. Engineer tenatively places a hand on Spy's shoulder, steadying him, speaking as calmingly as he can manage, "That's right, your name's not Tim. I'm not sure what it is, but it's not that. Now, sssh, it's okay, you can stay here, I've got you. No one's gonna get down here. We both know that. Here, siddown, you're about to hyperventilate." He points to the Intel desk's chair. "You're safe now. Relax." owl tiem: Of course it isn't just the name, it's - it's everything, it's all of it, and he really, really can't explain /that/. Spy sits down and slowly, shakily, removes the unlit cigarette from his mouth - he's bitten clear through the filter. Big eyes flicked up at Engineer: "B-but I c-c-c- -- I'm - I c-c-can't - " Can't go back. Can't stay here - can he? Karmabot: He keeps that hand on Spy's shoulder, and shoots him a look that allows no argument. "You can stay." Final, but caring. Spy's his friend. Has been for a while, Engineer realizes. Hell if he's letting the little spook back to the enemy team, not when he was sure that they'd kill him and also that he could talk the REDs into letting him stay. "You can stay as long as you want, Spy." Jones: Spy sits there, frozen. He heard what he thought he heard but it had to be too good to be true. He had just killed another BLU - if he could really say he was a BLU anymore for doing that. For being covered in all this red blood, his suit totally ruined. BLU would be down RED's throats looking for him, he was sure of it. He was putting everyone in RED in danger. These were Engineer's friends. Oh god. "I-I-I'm s-sorry. Th-the BL--U-" He pressed his hand to Engineer's. His heart was breaking. He might have just signed the death warrant for his Engineer by running here. Even though this was the safest place it was still in danger.
And that's where it left off. NJOI.
GNEE. Ilu Anon. I'm a huge sucker for that h/c dynamic. Ohhhh yes. That was so fantastic.
SDLJFSDF OH LAWD I LOVE SHYSPY WITH THE FIERY WHITE HOT PASSION WITH THE BURNING AND THE SUNS AND THE need more like breathing OHGODPLOXXXXXX maybesomeshypornohgoshohgosh
>>18 Jesus Christ, calm the fuck down. You're making yourself look like a sixteen year old.
>>19 In their defence, I have pretty much the same reaction and I'm not at all 16. I use allcaps, lack of spacing and general lack of flow in responses as a way to express intense emotion over the Intarwebz pretty much everywhere but the chan. I learned my lesson about bringing that format here after getting tempbanned for typing like a retarded teenager despite not, in fact, being one, and only intending to imply that I was so overwhelmed with feeling by the work in question that I couldn't think in sentences. My point is, they're probably new. I love the atmosphere in this chan generally, but namefags are always uberharsh on newfags and while I understand the tough-love, you perhaps don't need to rage so badly on anons just trying to express their love.
20 WORD
Is there any hope for me that those awesome people write some more about Nottim? Seems like it's an old log, the lj entry is more than a year old itself...
There was another story (that I think owltiem might have written) about Nottim sneaking into Engie's room at night to sleep on the floor and sneaking out before he wakes up. Eventually, Engie catches on and he gets him some blankets and pillows together so he'll be more comfrotable. If anyone has that, that'd be dandy.
>>20 Thank you, kind anon. I'm the excitable OP of >>18 --not underage, just in embarrassing flaily capslock love with the fandom. It saddens me that this is apparently not allowed. I'll be more "mature" in the future, I suppose.
>>23 You know what's sad? I totally remember the existence of this story, I do not remember whether I wrote it or Engineer did or someone else entirely did - I want to say it was me and Engineer working together but I honestly don't know and I don't want to claim someone else's story. Unfortunately as you may have gathered from the fact that I can't remember the provenance, I don't have it anymore - it, along with most of the other fic I've written/had a hand in/archived, disappeared when my hard drive crashed and burned last year. >>22 Yeah, it's hell of old, like at least 2 years. Anyone who wants to borrow him is definitely way more than welcome to - that's my policy on any faggy OCs I've come up with, for the record, and the others involved in the creation of Nottim have expressed the same feeling about him in the past (viz. the extremely excellent Fennec piece that opened this thread). I would personally fucking ADORE reading someone else's take on him.
>>25 Dude, owl, if you want any of your old stuff back, I have most of it saved. Just say the word and I can repost, or hit me up with an email as to what you'd like. Sadly, though, that doesn't extend to the Engy floor-sleeping story, although I do remember seeing that. Dang it.
>>26 if you by any chance have the 12 days of christmas bullshit i wrote for secret santa either last year or the year before could you repost that over in /fanfic/ for me, just because it's seasonal? thanks! and if you don't have it, no problemo, the world will survive
I have the Engy floor sleeping story. I'm pretty sure it isn't by owl, but I could be wrong. Should I post it?
>>28 Yes, please.
>>28 post it poooooooooooooost it i wonder if it's by Engie
I have it too, I'm pretty sure it's an Owl. Mainly because the name field says owl tiem. --- More times than not, he wakes up curled in the corner of Engineer's room, with one of Engineer's blankets tucked carefully around his shoulders, one of Engineer's pillows on the floor next to him and his head cradled in his hands. He feels like an idiot every time it happens - he doesn't MEAN to sneak into his room, and he knows he shouldn't be, because what is he, a baby? But it's warm in there, and it's safe, and he knows that's just as stupid because his own room is safe, nobody's going to bother him, they all reassure him that he's on their team now and he's one of theirs and he should be fine. What is he even afraid of? He's just an idiot. An idiot who can't even talk properly to thank Engineer for the blankets (and on a cold night like this he really should've stayed in his own room, Engineer was probably chilly all night and it's all his fault). And he keeps telling himself that he's not going to go in there tonight, and then it gets to be late and he's all alone in the big room that still doesn't and never will feel like his (what has he ever done to earn it? Why does he deserve his own room over here on their base? Especially when he knows some of the others are doubling up, Pyro sharing a room with Demo and Sniper sharing with Heavy, and he's sure one of them had to give up a room of their own to let him have this one and he'd give it back if he could because he really doesn't deserve it), and he's sitting on the very end of his bed with his back in the corner where it meets the wall and his arms wrapped around his knees and he can't do this, and there's only one person who would ever be alright with him hanging around and he'll sneak in so quietly that Engineer won't even wake up and then he'll be sure to get up early and leave before Engineer even knows he's there and then it'll be okay, right? So he slinks down the hall with his cloak on, stepping as quietly as he can so no one hears his footsteps, and he opens Engineer's door to slide in silently and just exist in the same space as him - And Engineer has his little desk lamp on, and Spy didn't even see the light under the crack of the door, and he's awake and he heard him come in and he's turning around to see him. "Hey there, Spook." And all he can do is shut the door behind himself, so carefully that it barely even clicks as it latches into place, and then uncloak with his eyes on the floor and his cheeks burning. He really is an idiot. "Havin' trouble sleeping?" Engineer's voice is quiet and understanding and there's just the slightest hint of amusement in it, and Spy thinks he's got to be laughing at him, the stupid little Spy who can't even stay in his own room overnight, but he just nods and keeps his eyes on the cracks between the floorboards. "Well, that's alright. I'll get ya settled in." Engineer rises from his chair and moves toward the bed and pulls the covers back, and pauses for a moment. "Y'know, you don't gotta sleep on the floor," he says carefully, and Spy just shakes his head violently. It's not - it's not that he wouldn't - he can't take up Engineer's bed, he can't do that, it would be wrong and rude and he can't, and Engineer seems to understand that and just pulls off one of the blankets and a couple of pillows and makes a little nest on the floor, right where Spy always curls up on his own. "Y-y-you d-don't," Spy starts, and stops himself, gesturing at the blankets. "It's c-c-c- -" He stops again, angry at himself, and tries a second time - different word. He hates doing this, Scout always used to call him Porky Pig when he did it, but it's the only way to get the words out, and Engineer's never said anything like that to him, so maybe it's okay after all. "Chilly." "I got enough blankets to spare some, boy," says Engineer, with the warm little crooked smile that he turns on Spy sometimes and that makes him feel so fucking safe. "It'll be alright. I'm just sittin' up gettin' some notes down, anyhow. You ain't interruptin' anything." Spy still hates himself for it even as he sits down on top of the blankets. So stupid, running to Engineer's room like a little kid having nightmares. "You wanna take your jacket off, or at least your tie?" Engineer makes the suggestion with his back to him, taking notes at the desk again, and Spy's unspeakably grateful for that little bit of privacy as he does, in fact, slip out of his jacket and unknot the silk tie at his throat and slide under the blanket. "Didn't want you chokin' yourself in the night," Engineer observes with a slight chuckle, without turning back around, and then it's silent except for the scratch of his pen on paper, and Spy just lies there in the half-light for a while. "W-what are you d-d-d-d- ... w-what are you working on." It comes out all wrong, no inflection because he was too focussed on getting the words out, and he sounds like an idiot. But Engineer doesn't say anything, just starts explaining the math he's doing for an adjustment to the firing rate of his sentries, and Spy listens and absorbs every syllable until Engineer turns and looks at him one last time, muttering "Guess he fell asleep" in that indulgent tone of voice, and then turns the lamp off and climbs into bed. But Spy didn't, not until after he heard Engineer's breathing slow into slumber; and he remembered every single detail of what Engineer had told him about that sentry, too.
This is so freaking adorable! Man I've been waiting to read more of this, I love Nottim.
oh yeah that was mine :3 i remember writing it now i've seen it (and i recognize my style) thanks!!
holy shit, this just gave me the biggest missing part to this story i want to write.
Sometime, I need to write a piece with Nottim. I need to. Maybe a little Christmas piece. Maybe he can make a special Hot Chocolate machine just for Engineer out of one of his old Dispensers. Press button, receive beverage, make Nottim bite his knuckle and bounce with joy.
>>35 Damn you Lighnings-Shadow. You and your Octopus mind. This needs to be done. I am sort of in love with NotTim Spy. I have sadly started a fanart of him.
Jesus this is just....this is just amazing. flat out O-MI-GOSH stupid fangirl material! <3 Delivered in my favorite format (log-style) adorable character that is just SUPER AWESOME AMAZING because jesus H. CE-RIST you are just the most damnedest cutest thing I have done seen! I love you. All of you. Best christmas story-present ever.
Hey, remember that thing I said I'd write for Christmas? It's late. I... kinda rushed to finish it, and it isn't what I'd initially set out to write. And it's too short. And I'm not sure if I nailed NotTim's inner momologue. And I'm sorry if I shouldn't put it up here because it is your thread, OwlTiem, but... I want you to have it. I'll fix it, I promise. ---- There was always a week-long ceasefire period during the holidays so that everyone could celebrate as they saw fit. Christmas was certainly no exception. One might have found it odd to see so much happiness and joy spread throughout a war base usually fraught with explosions, gunpowder, and raw carnage. These men wore the firm skins of brutish mercenaries, and yet when that one magical time of year came by, that roughness melted away into something more accepting, more kind. In the center of the rec room, sofas and game tables had been pushed aside to make room for the towering, robust Tree. It had been harvested and mounted just that day, and already it was almost fully clothed for Christmas. Little candy canes and ornaments hung from ever other branch like a trophy, and even if the candy canes were the same ones used for the Tree every year, old and stale, they were still beautiful against the green. All that remained was the final touch. "Don't—DON'T... fuckin', drop me, dude, I almost had it!" Scout shouted, one foot on Demoman's shoulder, the other daintily bent up behind him (Scout didn't realize he was doing it), and one arm painfully stretching to slip the star on top. It was nearly there, too, but Scout couldn't seem to stretch that last little inch, or else he might send everyone and everything tumbling down. Everyone was there, standing back and watching the precarious ritual unfold. Most of them wanted to help, but Scout had called the star and barked at anyone else who dared try touching it because he'd fuckin' called it, so he got to put up. And far be it from the rest of the team to stop Scout from calling the shots. "Ah said, lad, Ah goot yeh fine. Have a li'le fehth, why doncha?" "With your sense of balance? Yeah, right!" "Jus' geet tha bloodeh star up." "I'm tryin', hold up...!" In the corner of the room, cloaked and hidden, was NotTim. He watched the spectacle with avid but worried eyes. Scout wasn't going to get the star on without taking all the team's hard work to the ground in a crashing heap. And what were they thinking, letting Demoman be Scout's support? Demoman's balance and care was even worse than Scout's! NotTim nibbled his lip, too anxious to watch and yet too concerned about his friend's safety to look away. Ah, there, the gilded star slid onto the top like a glove over a hand, proud and perfectly erect. "Got it!" Scout slunk back, full weight squarely on Demoman's shoulders, then hopped back to solid ground. A few of his teammates cheer; it was a rather impressive balancing act, and the Tree's decoration is finally complete. Oh, good, thought NotTim. They were okay. Scout was firmly on the ground, and the Tree was still up. Good, good, good. They all stepped back, then, and viewed the Tree from tip to toe, silently admiring their handiwork. (Except for NotTim; he hadn't dared to help out. Not that he hadn't wanted to, because it looked kind of fun and Engineer looked like he was really happy, but everyone was there and everyone was talking and laughing and they'd want him to talk, too, and then he'd choke up and stutter like an idiot or he'd break one of their pretty candy canes and then they'd get angry at him and– no, no, no, oh no. Just... no.) "Star is very pretty," Heavy observed. A few of the others nodded. Everyone was smiling, and Soldier was pulling a grimace that kind of resembled a smirk, so it counted. Sniper claped his hands together. "Now, on to the sweets!" Exuberance filled the air. Everyone filed out for the kitchen, eager to sample Pyro's Flaming Sugar Stars and Sniper's home-recipe Gingerbread Boomerangs ("I'd be more than happy to make yer good ol' American Gingerbread Men, Digger, but we ain't got no bloody cookie-cutters, so I'm makin' due. They'll taste the same anyway."), except for NotTim and Engineer, who was still admiring the Tree fondly. Engineer waited until everyone was in the kitchen, well out of earshot. "Beauty, ain't she?" The Texan spoke, knowing NotTim was listening. "Doc gave us that star our first Christmas. Never told us where he got it from, but we stopped askin' eventually. I remember, our first Christmas, seein' ol' Heavy hoist him up onto his shoulders to get Doc closer to the treetop." Engineer chuckled. "Scared the Doc somethin' fierce, I tell ya! He'd asked for a hand, but I doubt he expected anthin' like that. He got it up all the same though, an' by God, it was just lovely." He glanced back into the seemingly-empty corner. "Don't tell Doc I told'ja, though. I'd get one helluvan earful if he knew." No reply. Engineer smiled. "Oh, and Spook? If'n you were wonderin', stale candy canes're just as good'n sweet as fresh ones. An' there's so many up here, I doubt any of the guys would notice if one or two went missin'." Silence... And then NotTim lifted his cloak. "There's my li'l Spook," Engineer smiled. NotTim glued his eyes to Engie's shoes, hands wedged behind his back, but he smiled. Slowly, timidly, he shuffled up next to Engineer. "You like candy canes? I love 'em. They go nicely with a couple gingersnaps an' a little hot cocoa. Here, I'll split one'a these with ya, if ya like." Engineer plucked one vibrantly striped cane, and offered it to him. NotTim tittered and politely shook his head (even though, deep down, he really wanted a candy cane, he loved candy canes, even old ones, but... he– they– he couldn't take these, they belonged to the team. They weren't his to eat! They weren't his to eat at all!) Engineer noticed how NotTim's eyes dilated when he saw the candy cane. The kid definitely wanted it. "What if I let you have some as my little treat?" NotTim's eyes lit. A treat? Engineer was giving him a treat? Well, when he put it that way... NotTim supposed treats were okay. Engineer snapped the candy cane in two. "Would you prefer the straight end, or the bent end?" NotTim's eyes flicked between the two halves. "... E-either." Engie smiled again, friendly and warm, and gave him the straight end. NotTim took it, pulled the wrapping off, and popped the broken end into his mouth. A wave of sweet, cool, pepperminty goodness filled his taste buds, and it tasted so delicious that NotTim sighed. Candy canes were... little sticks of heaven you could hang on trees. Engineer slipped an arm around NotTim's shoulder, slowly, gently, so as not to startle him. NotTim tensed for a moment but relaxed just as soon. It was only Engie. Engie was safe. NotTim let himself scoot closer until their shoulders touched, and he hesitantly let his head rest in the nape of Engie's neck. Engie let him, and that meant the world to NotTim. "Spook?" NotTim looked up. "Merry Christmas." NotTim felt his heart flutter. He loved Engineer. He loved him so much that it almost hurt. But Engineer would never hurt him. Engineer wouldn't let anyone hurt him. Engineer was the best person in the world. ".... Merry Christmas... Engineer..."
>>38 I think you gave me the beetus.
>>38 ...Christ this was so cute. God and so perfect. I think you did an amazing job. (And had appro since I finally finished my NotTim fanart: http://tf2chan.net/fanart/res/25.html#1820 Shameless plug, I know.)
>>40 Dude. Dude. Dude. That is exactly what I pictured him to look like! Right down to the loose tie! Poor guy looks so... sad. Troubled. He need da hugz. Also, I looked at the reversed text and first thing I saw was, "My name is Mitton" His name is Mitton. And thank you. I'm glad I didn't fail too bad with it. I might still write the "Dispencin' a Present" one, just because it's far too cute to just let go of. Thank you!
>>38 >>40 i am dead now because of you two
>>42 Oh nose. Is that good?
Okay! NotTim's back! Consider this a down payment on the entire story I owe. Also, it's kind of to check as make sure I got NotTim's mind-process accurate. I can never be sure. Enjoy! "Dispencin' a Present" --- NotTim paced back and forth furiously in his (not his) room. His candy cane had long since been sucked away, and even though he wanted to go get another, he just couldn't. Asking for more sweets, more treats, would make him look ungrateful for what he had been given and he'd be saying that what Engineer had gifted him with wasn't enough for him, and he'd look like a greedy little Spy that was never satisfied with anything and Engineer would regret giving him any of the candy cane in the first place. He could not have the candy canes unless Engineer said he could. And even so, candy canes look better when they're hanging on the Tree than they look sticking out of his mouth. So NotTim paced around with two cigarettes in his lips, eyes on the ground before him and arms hugging his stomach so tight that he was starting to feel a little sick from the pressure. (Well, that and he hadn't gotten any breakfast. Too loud that morning. Too risky. Someone would've seen him in there.) He was trying to keep himself calm and under control so he could think, but the cold and the ever-present bout of fear that welled up in him at times like these were making things very difficult. Engineer had put his arm around his shoulder. He'd done it slowly, gently, so cautious, so careful not to scare NotTim. His arm had been big, strong, a little heavy, and oh, goodness, it had been so warm. It had felt so nice on his neck and shoulders, so cozy and safe, and oh, it was so very, very good, and he'd almost wanted to hug Engineer! Oh, but he couldn't; there was no way to escape hugs. You were clamped between two massive arms that kept you from going anywhere and you couldn't get out. But, if Engineer's arm had felt that nice... NotTim couldn't even imagine how good it would feel to hug Engineer. NotTim happily sighed at the thought. His pace quickened around his (not his) room. He wondered, briefly, if being so close to Engineer was worth the risk of an inescapable embrace, but the thought instantly vanished and was replaced with the one, life-saver's mantra: Always have an escape plan. ALWAYS have an escape plan. No matter what the payoff of a risk may be, a Spy must always have the power to flee the scene on a dime if necessary. NotTim frowned in dismay, sucking on his cigarettes. He couldn't taste the nicotine, or he didn't want to. It wasn't a pleasant thing, smoking, but without it, God only knew what kind of a sorry wreck he'd be. It was a wonder he hadn't developed ulcers by now. NotTim whipped his thoughts back to Engineer. Christmas would be here in a few days, and after all that Engineer had done for him, NotTim felt obligated to give him something. The only problem was what that gift would be. What could he possibly give Engineer that he would like and didn't already have? And it couldn't be something from a store; that was lazy, and Engineer deserved so much better than a store gift. Engineer deserved something special; something unique. What was something that NotTim and only NotTim could make? Mistakes was the first word that came to mind. He tensed; an instinctive reaction, but then he stood straight and shook his head. "N-not... not g-gonna m-mess up..." He just needed to think. Think of all the things Engineer has talked about. What sort of things did he ever mention— "You like candy canes? I love 'em. They go nicely with a couple gingersnaps an' a little hot cocoa..." –really liking? Gingersnaps and hot cocoa. Oh, but... NotTim didn't know how to cook! What was he supposed to do now!? And even if he could cook... the... the kitchen... wasn't... his...! Pyro cooks. But– But– He– He couldn't ask for help! Pyro would never teach him how to cook! Why would Pyro bother helping NotTim when Pyro knew he'd just wind up spilling ingredients everywhere and messing up as always? Pyro's your friend. But... he still couldn't ask for such a big favor like that. It was Rude. Scout is your friend, too. But Scout can't cook, can he? And even if he could, Scout wouldn't. He's got his own gifts to give. He can't waste his time helping NotTim. This is for Engineer. ... NotTim stopped pacing. ... ... ... ... ... "... Yer a great Spy, son..." Well, that was it, then. A wave of energy swept over him, starting in his chest and spreading throughout his whole body. His heart pumped harder, driven by something that, for once, wasn't fear. This was Engineer he was talking about. Engineer had saved him from getting killed by his old teammates when he didn't have to. Engineer let NotTim sleep in his room sometimes, and Engineer talked to him, too. Engineer had done so many things for NotTim out of sheer kindness, and NotTim owed it to Engie to be a Brave Spy and give him the best gift ever. Even if it meant talking, and-and getting laughed at, and... and being called 'stupid'... NotTim would do it! NotTim had to do it! For Engie! He looked up at the door shut tight in front of him. He was usually afraid to open doors, but if Engineer was waiting for him on the other side, then by-golly, NotTim had to open that door! NotTim took two steps forward, grasped the handle so tight that the bones in his fingers creaked, and he jerked the door open. And it didn't budge. He pulled again. It still didn't open. NotTim blinked. Then he realized the problem and squeezed his eyes shut in humiliation. He turned the handle, and then jerked the door open.
Coming back after a week to find another NotTim... how he swells my heart with joy. I enjoy these fics... too much.
NotTim is growing on me. I realize this is partially because I have a little bit of NotTim's crippling awkwardness and self-doubt in myself. Okay more than a bit. Bawwww!
I like the fics, Lightnings-Shadow. I think you'd do well to have less of NotTim internal-monologuing, though; stuff like this seems way too self-aware: NotTim paced back and forth furiously in his (not his) room. His candy cane had long since been sucked away, and even though he wanted to go get another, he just couldn't. Asking for more sweets, more treats, would make him look ungrateful for what he had been given and he'd be saying that what Engineer had gifted him with wasn't enough for him, and he'd look like a greedy little Spy that was never satisfied with anything and Engineer would regret giving him any of the candy cane in the first place. He could not have the candy canes unless Engineer said he could. I'd be happier with something like "He really wanted another candy cane, but Engineer had already left", because what's so SUPER CUTE about the character (to me) isn't the painful and constant self-criticism, it's the fact that he's just the most insecure spy ever. He just doesn't go get another candy cane, and that's that, no whining. NotTim took two steps forward, grasped the handle so tight that the bones in his fingers creaked, and he jerked the door open. And it didn't budge. He pulled again. It still didn't open. NotTim blinked. Then he realized the problem and squeezed his eyes shut in humiliation. He turned the handle, and then jerked the door open. This is more of what I love about the character. It really gels with one trillion dicks' work (OP and sequel) -- he's a good spy! He just fucked up and then didn't know what to do. This is what gives him such wide appeal; I do that shit all the time. Also, I just want to thank anon for posting the original chat log. I read (and skimmed) most of it, and it was really interesting to see how you all took a bizarre in-game encounter and created a character. It was the closest thing I'm ever going to get to a Writer's Workshop filled with videogame nerd homos.
>>47 I must say right off the bat, thank you for this. I'll definitely keep your Crits in mind as I go back over the rest of the story. I also feel the need to mention something else, not to say that you're wrong, but just to express where I stand on it: I also find NotTim's insecurities purely adonkable, however, I find it hard to write him without/with less of that aspect. Insecure people beat themselves up over a lot of things. But you may be right in that I make him beat himself up too much. That being said, I will take this piece of advice as well. Again, thank you for the Crit!
>>41 You know, I don't know why I just now noticed that your head read his name backwards as Mitton. It's just adorable if that actually was his name, because that name derives from mutton, and now I have an image of Nottim with a pet sheep. A pet sheep that he totally spoils because it's HIS pet and he's never had a pet before but he wants to do it right and kinda goes overboard. He keeps it outside and doesn't let anyone find out about because he doesn't want it to get in anyone's way or bother people. And it ends up giving him some touch therapy because it's a pet and a sheep, and harmless, so he won't freak out about touching it as much, and it would help him get used to being touched in the process. I am not sure how he would hide it, but he would manage it somehow. Until maybe sniper spotted it with his scope and just got confused about why there's a sheep in dustbowl or gravel pit or wherever they are. And why it has a collar. Sorry about the spew. It's late and my brain is running away with me. I'll probably regret posting this in the morning.
>>49 This is the most adorable premise I have ever read.
I am assuming since this is in the Adult Fanfiction section that there is going to eventually be some adorable awkward sex with NotTim because I'm pretty sure my insides would melt if there was.
>>49 Holy Shit. NotTim has a pet sheep. Named Mutton. Insta- Head Cannon.
hahaha 49 here. Glad you guys like it. I would like to write a Nottim mutton fic for you guys, but i have no idea how to go about it. The last time I wrote a fanfiction was... hmmm. I think it was way back when I was in high school, and it was fairly atrocious. It pains me when I go back and read it now. But Mitton and Mutton! I can draw this... badly, but I can draw it!
I love the Nottim renaissance, but echoing what folks above me have said, I think not actually referring to him in the text as "NotTim" would be preferable. He's Spy; he's the only Spy. He's just a different Spy.
>>54 Ah, yes, you make a very valid point. I shall adjust the story accordingly. Thank you everyone for your help! I am finishing up and editing the next little part now. NotTim goes to ask Pyro for help.
This post has been deleted.
Here we are, the next bit, short and sweet. ComCrit away! "Dispencin' a Present" --- NotTim stood in the corner of the now emptied kitchen, watching Pyro put all the leftover cookies in a plastic container to store in the fridge, wondering exactly what the heck had possessed him. This was a bad idea, and it probably wasn't going to work. He'd have to talk. Pyro shut the fridge door, then looked right at Spy and waved. "Rr! Hrr thrr, Sphrrk! Drrd yrr wrrnt srrm crrkrrs?" Spy tensed. Run, run, RUN! Pyro motioned for him to come sit down. Spy didn't want to... but, if Pyro had already seen him and wan't kicking him out, then he supposed there was no real reason not to stay... especially if there were... NotTim had a seat at the empty table. Pyro opened the containers and daintily retrieved two Flaming Sugar Stars and one Gingerbread Boomerang, (Pyro kind of stuck his pinkies out when he handled food, Spy noticed) placed them gently on a plate and served it to him. "O-oh no, I-I c-c-couldn't—" "Yrrs, yrr crrrd, Sphrrk! R knrr hrr mrrch yrr lrrv swrrts. Grr rrn, trry thrrm!" Oh, he shouldn't, but he really did want to. Delicately picking up a yellow and orange colored Sugar Star, Spy took a small bite of one point, felt the grainy sugar on his tongue, rolled it around in his mouth, and let it dissolve. Then, eyes practically shining, he bit off the entire spike. Pyro laughed. "Srr? R knrr yrr'd lrrk thrrm." Spy slowly worked the delicious sweetness around in his mouth and swallowed the syrupy goo it left behind. "I-I-It's so... the-they're s-so...!" "Swrrt? Mmm-Hmm! Swrrtrrst crrkrrs rrvrr! Scrrt hrrd frrv hf thrrm rrlirr. R trrld hrrm thrrgh, 'Drrn't rrt hll hf thrrm, rr thrr wrrn't brr rrny lrrft frr Sphrrk!' R mrrd thrrm frr yrr, yrr knrr." NotTim's chest tightened, eyes wide. "F-f-f-for... me?" "Yrrp! Wrrll, R hrrd yrr rrn mrrnd whrrn R mrrd thrrm. Nrr hn lrrvs shrrgrr lrrk yrr, hrftrr hll." Spy looked at the Star in his hand, then back at Pyro. Despite every fiber in his being telling him not to cry, he couldn't stop himself. Pyro made me cookies... Pyro made me sugar cookies... and here I am asking him to help me make a present for Engineer and not him... and I didn't even show up at the table when he served them — for me! Oh no, no, no! I can't do this, I can't do this, I can't, I can't, I can't... "... Sphrrk, Sphrrk, rrt's rrkrry! Rrt's rrkrry! Drrn't wrry, R wrrntrrd trr mrrk thrrm! Thrr yrrs! Jrrst frr yrr!" Spy hadn't even realized he'd started crying his eyes out. Pyro was sitting next to him now, one rubber hand on his back, rubbing slowly, soothingly. Apparently he'd been babbling a little as well. Oh god, he hadn't said too much, had he? "Rrt's rrkrry, Sphrrk, rrt's rrkrry. Rrvrrthrrng's rrkrry." How was he supposed to ask Pyro for help now? Spy didn't have one thing to give Pyro in return, and on top of that, he'd just burst into tears like a big fat baby. Pyro was going to be sad when he asked. Pyro probably already wanted him gone after he'd just cried all over the place. His hands were shaking like mad, but NotTim somehow managed to reach into an inner pocket and pull out his personal notebook and pencil. He opened to a new page, with difficulty, and began scribbling down everything he wanted to say but knew he couldn't. He didn't know what else to do, but he had to do something. Pyro watched the words appear as Spy wrote with one hand and held the Sugar Star in his mouth with the other, mostly to stifle his bawling. "Rr, Sphrrk! Sphrrk, Sphrrk, yrr drrn't hrrv trr grrv mrr rrnythrrng! Yrr drrn't hrrv trr grrv mrr rrnythrrng ht hll!! Rrt's Chrrstmrrs! Rr, Sphrrk, Sphrrk!" Spy was sucking on the Star like mad, and it was probably already half goo in his mouth, but all the salty tears were making it hard to tell. He ought to run away, he thought, he really ought to just go away and leave Pyro alone because nobody ever wanted him around after this kind of breakdown, but... he couldn't. He just... couldn't find the gall to run away from his friend after being given such a gracious gift. And he had absolutely no clue why. Normally he'd be out of there faster than thought. "Thrry'rr jrrst crrkrrs, Sphrrk. Rrt's rrkrry. Rrt's rr-rrkrr-rry." Eventually, after much of Pyro's coaxing, Spy found himself calming down. He had to wonder why, too. He would usually pour his soul out through his eyes for hours before calming down if Engineer wasn't there with him. He ate more of the Sugar Star, and suddenly found that he felt... better. A lot better, actually. Wow. It was weird. He... actually hadn't cried like that in a while. He was still tense, but he'd forgotten how good it felt to just let everything out. "Rrh, thrr wrr grr, hll brrtrr nrrw?" Spy sniffed. That was really weird. He took another bite, and the sugar was even more sweet now than before, and it was just so unbelievably delicious that Spy didn't want to think about anything else. "A-are... y-you sure you....?" "Rr'm prrsrrtrrv. Drrn't yrr wrry hrrbrrt mrr. R mrrk crrkrrs frr rrvrryrrn hn Chrrstmrrs." Spy half-listened and nodded. He slipped the last of the first Sugar Star into his mouth and sighed as he grabbed the second one. Ooh, so very good. Great, even. NotTim felt great, and all warm and fuzzy inside. Since his mouth was full, and talking when your mouth is full is Rude, Spy went to write his question for Pyro in his notebook. He didn't even think about it; his hand just... started writing. But Spy didn't mind too much; it was easier to do this than it was to talk anyway. It was a bit difficult to hold the pencil for some reason, but he got the entire message down nonetheless. Once Spy finished writing, he fumbled with his pencil before just giving up and letting it drop. He lazily brought the second Star up to his lips. Pyro didn't seem to notice his odd behavior and clapped his hands together in utter joy. "Hrrt Chrrclrrt rrnd grrngrr snrrps? Frr Rrngrrnrr!? Rr grrdy!! Rr'd lrrv th hrrlp yrr mrrk Rrngrrnrr srrm trrhts!! Rrnd R knrr thrr prrfrrct rrcrrprr, trr!" Pyro dashed back to find the recipe book cabinet. NotTim just sat still, nice and quiet. And tired. Why did he feel tired? And when had his cheeks started burning up? Come to think of it, his entire face felt a little hot. Very, very odd. And yet he couldn't recall ever feeling so calm before. Spy took another bite from his Sugar Star. Not even curling up with Engineer had made him feel so rela— Spy froze. Somewhere in his brain, the pieces fell into place. He stopped mushing his bite around. His eyes locked on the Sugar Star in his hand. "Uh, P-P-Pyro...?" "Yrrs, Sphrrk?"" "U-um... uh... F-Flaming Sugar St-St-Stars...?" "Rr, wrrll, yrr knrrw," Pyro made a vague gesture with his hand as he extracted a big, blue book. "Thrr frrd crrlrr rrnd hll... R mrrn, thrry lrrk lrrk thrry'rr hn fyrr, drrn't thrry?" "Er..." Spy felt a wave of something warm pulse echo though his stomach. It felt like there was a beach inside him, and every wave that washed up filled him with warmth. It wasn't an entirely pleasant feeling. "Rr! Hrr's thrrs prrsky rrcrrprrs! Hrr yrr gh, Sphrrk!" Pyro placed on the table a pair of notecards with ingredients, supplies, and instructions scribbled on them. One was labeled "Lucy's Ginger Snaps," and the other "Hot Chocolate with Nutmeg". "U-u-uh..." "Krrp thrrm hs lrrng hs yrr nrrd thrrm, rrnd lrrt mrr knrrw rrf yrr nrrd rrny hrrlp wrrth rrnrrthrrng!" Spy blinked through the haze of tired that swept him up, fumbled for his notebook and his pencil that had rolled onto the floor, and tried to slip them back into his inner coat pocket. He was sweating hard under his balaclava, and he knew it. "Th-th-thanks..." he murmured quickly, and cloaked to make a hasty getaway. NotTim was out of that kitchen and down the hall in a jiff. Pyro tilted his head. A few moments later, sourceless steps approached the table again, slow and embarrassed, and the notecards vanished into an invisible hand. Pyro was happy that Spy would never see his huge smile.
and here I am asking him to help me make a present for Engineer and not him Perfect. A few moments later, sourceless steps approached the table again, slow and embarrassed, and the notecards vanished into an invisible hand. Perfect.
>>55 Lightnings-Shadow, I want to take you home with me and make you write NotTim stories forever. FOREVER. And dammit. Now I gotta draw NotTim eating cookies.
I should go see my dentist, I think I have cavities now, Lightnings-Shadows, from your story. This is too cute! I can't wait to read the rest!
>>59 Well chai that all depends, do you have an OCTOPUS AQUARIUM HOME? Because if you do then hot damn, I'm packin' my stuff. Fanart will get you anything outta me. I'm such a sucker.
>>61 I DO. GET IN YOUR OCTO-CAR AND FLOAT TO ME! http://tf2chan.net/fanart/res/25.html#i1943
>>62 DEAR GOD. He looks so... so happy... so content... BRILLIANT. TIME TO CATCH THE DEEP-SEA TAXI. And since you've so special, chai, I'mma tell you this. NotTim goes to Scout for help next, but because Scout had five of those questionable Sugar Stars and then stole two more, he's higher than a kite. Yes, Pyro put something in the Sugar Stars to get the team to chill the hell out. He just wants to listen to 'Jingle Bell Rock' in peace for once, doncha know. NOW BE EXCITED WHEN I GET TO MY NEW HOUSE.
>>64 OOHHH. Naughty Pyro. You are so naughty! I GOT A HUGE TANK SET UP JUST FOR YOU, BBY.
>>63 I love your Pyro and your tiny failspy. I want to hug them and you. You and your tentacles Lightening are welcome around my general person anytime.
Someone should write out that part in the chat dialog where they actually meet, or at least when the spy comes to join them, in story form. Also, can't wait to see the next part Lightning!
NotTim is possibly the best spy ever. Hopes thing eventually turns into smut, becuase it'd be both cute and hilarious
I love NotTim so much. Not so great at writing, but I had to do this one little idea that got stuck. Now double spaced so its easier to read. ---------------------------------- Spy sat curled in a corner in the Intel room. The whirring and clicking were so repetitive (it was his own secret, that he loved it and wished he could hear it in his room. It would be like a night-light for the old Scout on BLU, like he used to have. He doesn’t have it anymore because of me. His mother has it and no son). Spy pulled his knees up closer and covered his ears with his hands. The RED Intel room was safe, none of that was here for him. Here was where Engineer let him hide, and let him be without telling anyone he was there and hiding in the corner by the desk (just close enough to the glass windows that he could touch them with his arm if he breathed deep enough. But he wouldn’t because then he would leave a mark, so just close enough he could but didn’t). There was the concrete wall behind him, cool in the summer heat, and familiar. It was his little part of wall (though, not really, but nobody bothered him for it), just for Spy. Hiding down here in his(not really his) spot was perfect. During off hours nobody else cared about the Intel room (nobody probably cared to know where he was anyway, so that was just fine), even Engineer would rather stay in the workshop. Spy brought one hand down to bite on the glove seam; he shouldn’t have snuck in the workshop. He wanted to see what Engineer was doing, (and he couldn’t knock, because then he’d have to talk and it would be a big mess.) and snuck in the barely open door that was open so it wouldn’t get too hot, and just looked at the papers on the desk quickly. Then he ran out before his cloak would fail (because Oh God, if he was caught in the RED workshop! It was his workshop, but not really, he was BLU, but now he was RED.) Spy bit harder on the leather, freezing when it squeaked from the friction. Nobody was coming down there anyway, sitting cloaked was silly (but it would prevent him from being asked questions and having to talk if anyone did come by). He came right down that morning, before anybody was awake. And nobody would know, because Spy was ‘odd’ and did his own thing. Or they didn’t care because Spy was a traitor and killed his own team mate (not his team mate any more, but he was dead, so he was nobody’s team mate). He shook slightly, he was shaking most of the day. He only stopped shaking when he went to peek at Engineer’s work (which was bad. Spy shouldn’t have done that, Engineer would be furious if he found out). And once he was back on the stairs to the basement, he was shaking again. Spy tugged at his hair, he was always shaking. He choked a little on the shuddering breath he was holding. He chewed his glove a bit more (he needed to stop doing that. He had already bitten holes in his other pair, and Engineer gave them to Sniper to fix. It wasn’t Sniper’s job to fix them, it was Spy’s job not to bite them.). He pinched the bridge of his nose with a shaking hand, the other finally dislodging from his grinding teeth to slip into his pocket. He pulled out his silver case of cigarettes, he couldn’t smoke here (they would know he was down there), but he couldn’t keep biting his gloves (Sniper or Engineer would have to repair them, and they were his gloves, not theirs. They were his responsibility). He slipped the filtered end between his lips and chewed on it while he struggled to light it. The lighter clattered to the ground, skidding across the floor a few inches. Spy made a strangled noise and went back to tugging at his hair (which was stupid. He would look ridiculous with a chunk of his hair sticking out of the mask.). He looked after it, daring to shift his weight forward a little, trying to get close enough to reach it. “Hello? Spah?†Engineer’s footsteps echoed down the hall (he must have found out Spy peeked, he must be angry.). Spy leaned back, chewing more vigorously on the cigarette and shaking even more. “You down here Spah?†“N-n-n-n..g-g-g-“ Spy dropped his head to his knees, snapping the cigarette. “Ah. N-n-n-no†He whispered to his knees (Engineer couldn’t find him here, not like this. They’d kick him out for sure. He hadn’t been able to say anything for three days now, and now he was cowering in a basement. He was done for.). He choked back some more ragged breaths, how stupid, he should have never left his (not his) room. “Spah?†Engineer was walking into the room now, Spy could just see it, and he would find him and laugh. Because Spy was sitting in the corner tugging out his hair and biting holes in his gloves and not even being able to light a cigarette or to tell anyone anything. Engineer stepped into the room, and looked around. He could hear something, but it could have been a computer or camera for all he knew; until he heard the faint gasping noise that was obviously not mechanically made. “Where are ya? It’s just me, c’mon. Nobody’s seen ya all day. You down here?†Oh God, Engineer sounded worried, he probably thought Spy went and told secrets to BLU, he was probably worried Spy was actually there and he would have to talk to him. “Y-y-y-… O-ove-er h-h-he…†He tugged at his hair again and raised his head just enough to get the cloak off before letting it fall back to his knees. “There y’are. I was wonderin’…†Engineer walked over with his slow relaxed strides. “What are y’doin’ down here all alone? Did you get any lunch yet?†Spy shook his head, he hadn’t even had breakfast yet. Not his food to take. “Come on then, let’s go get somethin’ to eat.†Engineer crouched down awkwardly (Oh, his back. He was saying how badly it hurt after the battle and now he is down here because of Spy, and it’s his fault Engineer’s back is going to hurt now) to see if Spy would respond then. He shook his head. Truthfully, something to eat might have been nice, but he was so worked up right now he felt awful. He shook again and released another breath he didn’t realize he was holding. “Spy, you okay? C’mon look at me…†Engineer pulled at Spy’s arms that were wrapped around his head, tugging them away. “You alright?†Spy shook some more, Engineer was worrying over him and he shouldn’t because it was stupid to. “Y-y-y-y… Mhmm.†He didn’t lift his head, Engineer would try to get him to, but he knew he couldn’t. He knew his face was off color and blotchy from not sleeping and from holding his breath so much. Engineer wasn’t convinced and could see some of the hair that Spy had pulled through his balaclava. “Here, I got ya somethin’ y’might like.†Engineer reached up onto the desk, Spy lifted his head enough to see. He pulled down what he must have been carrying earlier and held it in front of him and out towards Spy. “I got ya a book, I figure if you want t’talk about anythin’ this might help.†It was a gorgeous leather bound notebook, and Spy just stared at it. “You can take it, it’s yours. If y’want it, of course.†Engineer’s face was just there, calm and open and honest. Spy shuddered with another held breath and shook his head. “Now c’mon Spah. It’s yours, I want ya to have it.†Spy reached out experimentally (this was probably a trick, but it was Engineer, so he wouldn’t lie) and held a corner of it. Engineer pressed it further into his hand. “There ya go. Got a nice pen upstairs too, though I figured you might want ‘em compatible with yer cloakin’ device. The pen is givin me some trouble, it’s a real novel thing. Folds up.†He smiled at Spy, who raised his head some more. “Come on, have you eaten at all yet? Y’don’t look well…†He frowned at that, but pulled himself up and offered a hand to Spy. Spy pushed himself up and kept looking back to the book in his hands, his book because Engineer knew he needed to talk. He stumbled a bit on his numb legs before gaining his footing and looking at Engineer. “Good to go? Everyone else already ate, it’s near three…†Engineer glanced at his watch for confirmation, and was correct. “You could use some food, I reckon, and a good sleep.†Spy looked down towards his shoes and nodded slightly, shaking again with the effort to breathe steadily. Engineer started walking towards the exit, slowly waiting for the second set of near-silent footsteps to follow. ---------------------------------------- Hopefully I didn't wreck anything- but he needs a book. How else would he communicate when he gets beyond upset.
NotTim snuck in and made himself a little nest in the warmest corner of my heart. If I ever get my writing mojo back, I have to give him a shot. Bravo to all the writers so far!
NotTim is a wonderful character. The shakes don't seem to be as intense around Engie as when he was with Pyro.
Poor Nottim! I know from experience how much fear and anxiety sucks. I wanna hug him! Your story was so sweet. "like a night-light for the old Scout on BLU, like he used to have. He doesn’t have it anymore because of me. His mother has it and no son." That made me so sad though. That's why I love respawn. But still, BLU scout shouldn't have been a dick.
72 Yeah, I'm sorry you have to know what its like. Thanks for the compliment on it though. I might do another one and pop it up in here... I really think NotTim is one of my new favorites.
http://www.fanfiction.net/s/6835309/1/NotTims_Christmas_Dispencin_A_Present Looks like Lightning's still writing her story. It's got a new chapter. Scout listens to Johnny Cymbal when he's high. I laughed too hard at that.
Pyro makes hash brownies! :D
These stories actually really struck a chord for me. I've had really horrible anxiety for most of my life, and at some points I was literally as bad as NotTim. The narration of his thoughts is just amazing, because it puts into words everything I was thinking and feeling at that time in my life and the unspoken "rules" that nobody got but me. Thank you for writing this. It's incredible.
I cant help but be incredibility interested in the charter of Nottim. After telling my self i was going to read it for the longest time, i finally sat down and read through it. what a unique type of character! very interesting to read about. While i certainly hope you do more, i am curious about what makes Nottim act like that? perhaps i should re-read it again (i probably will) but i would defiantly like to know a back story on this character, I've pieced together some things but i would love to hear it spelled out!
>>77 Speaking as one of the original creators, in my mind it's kind of important that he NOT have a backstory or any real reason to act like he does. I have suffered from similarly-crippling social anxiety in the past and I don't have a Tragic History or any real reason to be that way, and leaving him open like that so you can decide for yourself gives freedom to interpret him as you wish.
I CAN'T DEAL I NEED TO WRITE NOTTIM AAAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGG
Holy Mary Mother of Joseph. NotTim might be the single best thing I have seen out of TF2. I'm floored by the wonderful process of his creation, and the amazing writing that's been done with him. We need to bring NotTim back. He's the most adorable thing ever, and the world needs more. (side note: I LOVE the idea of his real name being Mitton)
>>80 Please don't bump a thread that hasn't been updated in five years. They're not coming back.