First fic. Crit is greatly appreciated. Namefagging just incase. Soldier was fetterd to the wall of Engineer's workshop, his erection standing at attention and leaking pre-cum. Faint whip marks lined his stomach and chest, and he struggled in his chains. Engineer paced in front of him, holding the aforementioned whip, pausing once in a while to give Soldier a seductive look. "what do you want?" he asked, running his middle finger down Soldier's torso, "what do you want me to do to you?" Soldier frantically looked around and choked out "whip me." "what do we say?" "please, sir." He made sure he said "sir". He didn't want to make Engie angry or he wouldn't get fucked. Engie put the whip between his legs and ran his gloved hands over Soldier's chest. "good boy." he murmured as he tweaked a nipple, making Soldier squirm. Engineer stepped back and raised the whip in one hand, and brought it to Soldier's chest with a loud THWAP. He howled, and Engie's dick throbbed at the noise. He brought the whip down again, this time harder, on Solly's stomach. Solly tried to arch into the blow, but the chains kept him stuck to the wall. "Oh fuck. Engie..." "I must say, you look mighty fine like this, boy. I bet I could do whatever I wanted to you right now." "Please." Soldier murmured, his eyes glazed over. "Please, what? I don't wanna hafta leave you like this." "Please sir." "There's a good boy." The Texan whispered into his captive's neck, licking and biting his way up to Solly's lips. He recently he discovered his lust for power. He always liked it when he got the chance to yell or order someone around. It excited him, to have someone at your beck and call, for them to do whatever you told them too, for them to call you "sir" and like it. How lucky for him that his lover wanted to be ordered around, talked down to and even whipped. He never pegged Soldier to be the type who enjoys pain, but it worked out quite nicely, in his opinion. "I'll be right back, hon." Engie said, leaving the man that was tied to the wall. He walked over to a tool-chest, that was slightly smaller than his usual one. He rummaged through it, making small grunts of frustration when he couldn't find what he was looking for. He eventually found it, and closed his hand around it. He sauntered back to his captive and held the item up for him to see. It was a purple egg-vibrator with a rubber strap connected to one side. He grinned at Soldier and slipped it over his dick. With the press of a button, he turned it on, and Soldier gave a low moan.Â
I'm really not sure what to say. Are you from the animu section? The purple vibrator and stereotypically executed bdsm point into that direction at least. Firstly, I'd recommend getting a beta, even though I've seen far worse on that topic. It's not completely bad for your first fic. The texan accent is nice. But except for the accent, you could use different names and nobody would ever notice. Engie doesn't exactly seem like a person who likes dominating people like that. Of course, it's not impossible though. Having a bit of a introduction to this version of him would probably help out a lot. How did he discovered this little kink? Also, how did he find out that Solly didn't mind at all? There's a lot of great references on here for bdsm, as you probably know. What makes them so enjoyable? To me, the greatest part of it is the psychological aspect. Their thoughts. I mean hey, there's a man in chains, who's usually in the frontlines in battle. Somehow in charge too probably. A fucking strong guy who's suddenly reduced to being completely helpless. There's a lot of potential in there. Engie could marvel over how easily he has full control of him; Solly could be written from cohorent thoughts over to the exact opposite. Plus, I think his pride would get into the way of begging that easily. As any good dom, Engie should understand that, slowly drive him to the limit and then just a tiny bit further. That's where the real appeal of it lies too. Where's the fun in Solly just going down on his knees and begging? Tl;dr, there's much to improve, but you might be heading the right direction. Don't stop trying.
Thank you so much. I really appreciate this. To answer your question, no. I'm not from any animu section anywhere. It was only purple because it was the first thing that popped into my head. I'll try to get a beta and I'll rewrite it, add some things, take some things out maybe. I get lazy when I have to write pig plot-driven stories but I'll work on that.