Hmmm. Nice attempt, but something is clearly lacking here. I just can't put my finger on it, though...

We already have a thread like this. It's also better.

Indeed, its obvious that you tried, and I respect you for that, and I'm gonna let you finish, but it seems something is missing...
And as >>2 said, i can't really put my finger on it though.

Also polite sage.

This is the worst fucking crossover fic ever, and they're usually pretty fucking bad. How dare you pollute our board with this shit? Also, it's obvious that you don't respect Hermione as an intellectual woman, which is what you seem to be trying to suggest in the intro. If you really did, you wouldn't have put her at the centre of that abysmally repetitive gang bang.