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No. 368
Previous ones, along with the beta thread can be still found on the old board.

Anonymous probably explained it best:

Instructions-
1. Post a request in this thread! (Possibly like this: pairing/ prompt - a situation, a kink, a song title, a quote, anything)
2. Someone fills the request with fic or art!
3. Read/look at porn. Awesome.

'Class and You' request were omitted, because it's not an issue; 'Class and You' stories are ALWAYS MORE THAN WELCOME.

UNFILLED REQUESTS LIST

1.heavy/medic after the war, what happens to them? Do they stay together? How?
2.Demoman/Sniper. Demoman makes use of his grenade duds.
3.Spy has his hallucination grenades from TFC and uses them on someone from the other team.
4.so what if Engineer gets drunk and builds a teleporter that doesn't quite work right. And then what if Demo uses it and suddenly he's in a world where he's WHITE (as seen in early concept arts) and everyone else is BLACK.
5.Ok I'm gonna request some Demo/Heavy
6.Twin heavies and a medic. Medic must be middle of sandvich. (*art produced, no fic)
7.I will do absolutely anything for a hardcore Heavy top with Spy bottom. Please. PLEASE.
8.Medic getting gangbanged by a bunch of big muscular men.
9.Requesting Scout/Soldier, Scout on top, Misery-style. (*this prompt is claimed, but not finished yet)
10.is a Medic x Stephen Colbert fine too?
11.Sniper and Medic, Sniper tied down and forced to watch Medic be a little slut as punishment for something he did, then Medic lets him fuck 'im.
12.I think that, IMO, some Soldier/Heavy is in order.
13.Spy/Sniper (otp lol), Engie/Pyro, Engie/Spy, Pyro/Engie/Spy, and ANYTHING DEMOMAN
14.Same-class Sex, Pyro-Pyro, Spy-Spy, Medic-Medic
15.Engineer/Soldier
16.Requesting a three-way: Two of the characters must be Heavy and Medic, and the third can be whoever.
17.a Scout, a Sniper, and a kitchen accident involving a lot of oil.
18.I would like retard scout (puddles) and anyone! Doesn't have to be smut.
19.I'd also like to request anything involving panties.
20.This is 100% ridiculous...but I think there should be a Spycrab fic. It doesn't even have to be adult, really. I just want to see someone try to make it work, or, y'know, just do it completely for the lulz.
21.....Sniper sits up in his little perch all day, unmoving, just waiting for that perfect headshot. He must get pretty damn restless staying still all the time. Perhaps he has some tried-and-true way of working off all that pent-up energy?
22.I'd like to request Heavy/Medic with a ROLE SWITCH. Classes switch or roleplaying, or Heavy giving first aid, I don't care. (OP of this request would also like an intellectual Heavy as a bonus.)
23.Could someone (who feels they could do it justice) please draw the scene from one of the Extra Credit Lessons where Heavy and Medic are fucking as Scout tries to sleep?
24.Or...fuck...or ANYTHING pornographic from the Lessons. GOD PLEASE. (Note: Tanner, please say the word and veto this request if you desire.)
25.Picture of Heavy being penetrated by all the REDs simultaneously yelling ENTIRE TEAM IS BABIES!
26.Heavy/Medic with Medic on top.
27.Also requestin spycrab on tentaspy for the lulz.
28.Spy x [someone, likely Engineer]. Employ use of stockholm syndrome and breaking them down for the intel.
29.I want some MedicxHeavy comfort/angst. Something really sweet and sappy. I want it to be cuter than a pink unicorn shitting rainbows.
30....may I humbly request some Tentaspy/Demo? Cause y'know, he did want to kill the Loch Ness monster...
31.(extending the feverish Spy idea) And maybe, just MAYBE, a sequel in which the molester, having caught the same bug, gets his just desserts.
32.Feverish Medic also seems to be a popular concept. Who heals the healers? etc.
33.Ooh,ooh! And as side nuttiness? Engineer is forced to work the Medigun while the poor doc is incapacitated. "Hey, it can't be /that/ hard to use!" (*cue poor Engie getting smacked backwards into a wall when he tries to prove his point*)
34.Anon demands TENTASPY WITH WHOLE TEAM.
35.I want to see some Sniper/Pyro. Pyro as the bottom and very shy, a la the "Freaky Friday" fic. I thought it was so adorable how he kept hiding his face, even though it wasn't his own.
36.I wanna see a violent Heavy/Solly fic. Not just violent, but violent in "I want to see punches fly" and some heavy (hurr) makeup sex. Its gotta be mean and dirty. That is all. Oh and its not going to matter who tops, because id love to see sudden top/bottom reversal durring the love maken. Oh yes I would... >:3c
37.I wold love to request ANY spy/engie or Heavy/medic
38.I'd like to see a female character (possibly a cook/janitor?) get absolutely railed by every team member
39.This one humbly requests ANYTHING PYRO. Scary Pyro, Ginger Pyro, Creeper Pyro, Batshit Insane Pyro, TentaPyro, MiniPyro, PyroZilla, Girl Pyro, whatever. I don't care what it is as long as it has a Pyro in it.
40.spy is out of cigarettes; spy is suffering nicotine withdrawal; scout is scout; spy is finding scout INCREDIBLY. FUCKING. ANNOYING. basically i want some pissed off spy <:3c (Leaving this up for failed attempt)
41.Pyro/Engie; Pyro's flamethrower gets broken in battle. Engineer fixes it up good as new, and Pyro decides to "repay" him.
42.Some Pyro on Pyro action (masks on)
43.More angry Heavy/Medic sex, that's always hot.
44.Scout making an intel run but gets hit knocked out and held captive by the other team. I don't care if it's the whole team raeping (Raep. Not rape. Difference.) him or which class however I would like two or more people. The more the merrier. But I do not want spy or medic involved unless it is the whole team. Anyone else but those two. As much as I love them I think they get enough love as it is. And I'm a whore for scout beyond anything else. ALSO bondage. I Want it. Or machines. Make it hot and dirty. Kink it up. Fill it with whatever I don't care as long as it is not just plain old sex.
45.remember when Meet the Sniper came out? And how everyone was going on, "LOL HE HAS A RAEP VAN!" Yeah. So why is there still no fic of this?
46.Medicated Spy. You can blame the Freaky Friday fic again. The new piece with Spy high on morphine was adorable. Think about him alone with Scout, doped up and feeling horny, hm?
47.I think it would be adorable to see a Soldier/Medic version of this famous photograph: http://www.skylighters.org/veday2004/vjkiss.jpg
48.BLU team, irritated with their Scout, strips him naked, oils him up like a greased pig, and tosses him into the enemy base.
49.How about some SniperxScout? Poor Scoot drops Sniper's favorite gun and breaks it. And then Sniper gets pissed and they have angry hate-sex. :C
50.The two versions of each class are connected on some unconscious level. So, BLU spy and BLU engie are screwing, which makes RED engie and RED spy suddenly want each other. they try to ignore it for as long as possible...leading to confused frantic sex, yay. or sniper/spy. anyone except spy/sniper/scout, bonus points for solly or heavy
51.soldier has a foot fetish, possibly scout related??
52.sniper is a creepy loner voyeur(perhaps going so far as to contain someone so he can watch them plead to be let out whenever he wants to, and he totally gets off to that)
53.more retarded scout! o exploitable
54.what we need more of is science. And by science, I mean Medic/Engineer.
55.Scout takes Sniper to the Outback Steakhouse for his birthday. Buttfucking ensues.
56.I want Engie in a dress. I don't care how or the circumstances, I just want to read a fic about it. Pretty please?
57.Requesting some Medic/Scoot pretty pretty please?
58.That's right. Announcer porn. Doesn't matter the pairing, as long as she's doing the whole dominatrix thing.
59.Medic/Scout; Scout being a good (or bad) patient! Up to you!
60.So how big is the demand for a fic with Scout on top for once?
61.Announcer and you DO IT FAGGOT.
62.WE need more heavy bondage. (Pun intended)
63.Scout X anybody. Scout has a leetle problem with premature ejaculation. Frustration and hijinks ensue.
64.Scout drinks Bonk! before sex. Strange/unexpected side effect(s).
65.BLU!Spy/RED!Spy; Sex at a semi public place, and in the middle of sex both of them decide to cloak themselves using their watches just in case someone walks in. Before RED!Spy can cloak himself, he gets head shot by the BLU!Sniper. Que "Watchmen - one of us died tonight!" from BLU!Spy and angsting
66.RED!Sniper and RED!Scout get into an argument, but have makeup sex afterwards? :D Or, uh, anything with Sniper/Scout will do.
67.Tentaspy medic? Im sure medic would love to dissect him. He could use the syringe gun to drug him. Or he plans to but, the drug is not as potent as he thought/ doesn't effect tentaspy ....
68.This is the opposite of kink, but has anyone ever done a story about the teams' lives away from fighting? Like people they have waiting for them at home, etc.
69.I'd like to see some Medic/Scout. Just for fun, give scout a spanking fetish.
70.Tentaspy/Puddles. someone must do it.
71.Tenny once wrote about Spy assuming his disguises with some magic ritual. I'd like to request something on the same line, but with Medic/Heavy. It is known that Nazis attempted different rituals back in their day. It can be the magical equivalent of Ubercharge, or a healing ritual (Or raising the dead!) - something fitting. Sexual magic is awesome but not a must; huge bonuses for a little blood and a dark atmosphere.
72.Someone please write up a psycho Spy. Red or Blu, doesn't matter. Make him crazy. Batshit psycho, like a quiet person everyone thinks is just kind of weird and solitary, but is really crazy and backstab-happy. But not like a normal spy should be. The Soldier Snaps fic was awesome, so please try to do something similar, but be creative.
73.Heavy breaks his arm and is in need of assistance in certain daily activities (namely showering). Medic takes on the chore of stripping him down, helping him wash, and suiting him back up to avoid any possible damage to the cast.
74.I challenge someone to attempt Engy/Sentry. Sentry's POV preferred.
75.I'd be interested in seeing a "How Heavy met Medic" fic. Porn would be awesome, although I guess not totally necessary.
76.There should be a Spy somewhere who is so good at disguising that each illusion of his is solid and real. He's bleeding too much? Put on another Spy Mask, good as new. One of the teammates has a fantasy about sleeping with the other team's Engie? He's on it. Hardmode: He can change into a fully functioning woman.
77.I would like to read a fic involving dominant/submissive role reversal. For example, Sniper is always the one boning Medic, but decides to let Medic bone him out of curiosity. (Actual pairing doesn't matter)
78.A fic in which Scout gets hardcore raped by the entire team, it can be threesomes or foursomes or more or it can be them all going in a line to get to him, put in any kink you think would make it better, I want him getting fucked so hard he won't be able to sit or stand for a month.
79.Would anyone be willing to write a sweet/romantic fic involving Engie and Scoot? Doesn't have to be hardcore if you don't want, or it can be hardcore as hell at some point... I don't care. I just want to see that pairing being all lovey-dovey.
80.Written in the style of Lolita by Nabokov. Scout is Lolita, Spy is Humbert. IT CANNOT GO WRONG.
81.Requesting a huge orgy of the entire team when everybody drinks Bonk! right before it. Hilarity and sex is the result.
82.'Kay, so earlier today I realized that I can't recall a recent fic involving Soldier/Sniper. Something along of the lines of egos clashing after a battle, maybe something like Soldier claims Sniper is a lazy Australian and not a "real man" for not engaging in the front lines of action, and Sniper says Soldier is a crazy, unprofessional, and unrefined American, etc. etc. (but you can come up with a better scenario), and of course, sex must ensue. Throw in some "struggle for dominance" and you've got me sold.
83.I'd like to see a sci fi action/adventure/thriller... One day, Demo realizes that everyone has blue eyes.The same blue eyes. And everyone's all "Whaaaat. We've always had eyes this color. ...Right?" Thus, it's up to Demo (the only one without blue eyes) to figure out what is going on within the walls of the ominous 2Fort. Starring DEMOMAN as the unsuspecting hero and MEDIC as the crazy overlord Nazi scientist.
84.From what I've seen in this fanfic section, Spy has been with every single class, except for Pyro and Demoman. I'm not talking about n00b Pyro or Frank...I mean just Pyro. I want to see Spy and Pyro together more, and Demo needs a chance with Spy, too, if he hasn't gotten one already. I'd also love to see more Spy/Scout. I love where Owl and Wol have taken the pairing, and I crave more.
85.Spy wakes up one morning and discovers that he has mysteriously been given noclip. Being the perv that he is, he uses his new powers for evil...and to his advantage when spying. I also want to see some delicious noclipped sex. I'd imagine they can still feel him, even though he goes right through them.
86.i would love some engy pyro *thinks* maybe..medic went to town for supplies and pyro gets hurt so engy takes care of him while medic is away? (doesnt nessisarily need to be pornsy, fluffyness would be satisfying too)
87.Requesting Medic being awesome. Any pair having sex (Preferebley something with sniper or Engie in it, maybe paired with Scout?) and Medic walking in on it. But Medic doesn't leave, he grabs a chair and starts to masturbate much to the dismay of the others.
88.Before Scout was born, Spy takes Scout's mom for a romantic evening and sex and she asks him how she can repay him. He says "BY LETTING ME RAPE YOUR LAST BORN SON."
89.i am now requesting SAXTON HALE/SNIPER in that order
90.RED Spy attempts to serenade his petite chou-fleur, but ends up at Scout's window. Lulz and hot sex, gogogo
91.disguised Red Spy giving Blue Medic surprise raep

PLEASE, try to contribute. And apologies if the above list contains mistakes.
Marked for deletion (old)
>> No. 369
Come to think of it, I guess a few of these requests should be wiped, because they do not fit the KINK part of the meme, or frankly, never will be written. Maybe we could use the previous thread to discuss this matter?
>> No. 370
Joy to the world the Meme has come. I agree, we should really discuss what we really want from the Kink Meme.... or something hehe alls I know is I gonna write some smut tonight!
>> No. 371
Actually, more than a few of these have been filled :I
>> No. 372
>>2
Was there ever a non-porn request thread?
>> No. 374
Vector, list 'em. I only remembered one.

And no, there was never a non-porn request. It's pathetic enough as it is.

Why the fuck doesn't the comment-linking want to work...?
>> No. 376
This may sound fucked-up, but hell, this is a kink meme... I want to see some Heavy/Medic, and the kicker is... *fanfare*

Mpreg. I imagined the Medic being preggers as the most hilarious thing in the world. It would include lots of Heavy/Medic love-smex, Medic being a bitch, the gory details of birth (especially when it comes to man-birth), and a surprise ending after the baby is delivered... I have an idea for this in mind, but I don't want to spoil it in case I'm the only one who's psycho enough to write it.
>> No. 378
>>5
>>6

Maybe someone should start a general request thread in /fic/? Or, not so much a request thread, but an I-have-this-idea-for-a-fic-that-I'll-never-write type thread. Maybe that would be better in /dis/.
>> No. 379
>>6

58, 50, 51, 56, 54, 19. That's all I found from the old thread, I thought there was more but I guess I was on crack :\
>> No. 380
>>7

Mpreg not being one of my fetishes aside (I find it more hilarious and disturbing than erotic in any way), I cannot imagine that Medic just becoming magically pregnant.

No... SCIENCE would be involved. And as we all know, a /good/ scientist never uses /himself/ as the test subject. Not when he's got a test subject that will pretty much do /anything/ for Doktor...
>> No. 381
I imagined it being a result of the crazy whims of the Announcer, actually. I mean, in my brain-world, she's the creator of the Respawn and all of those other unexplainable game phenomenon, so I figure she can just fuck with them however she wants.
>> No. 382
a hand comes out of engineer's ass
>> No. 386
I'm not much of a writefag... but 74 made me lol so I wrote....


"I don't ask for much. Just some oil, some ammo, and protection from spies. Being a sentry, I don't really need more than that. But it is nice to feel loved. My inventor, the engineer, always takes such good care of me, almost like I'm part of his family. He cleans the blood off of me after battles, he applies oil to my joints when I get creaky, and always stays near me in case there are spies in the base.

There are, however, a few odd behaviors that I cannot find a logical explanation for: Sometimes, when he runs out of wax to polish my outside (I assume he runs out, otherwise why wouldn't use it?), he'll use that strange looking appendage inside his mouth to clean me up... I mean, it gets the job done, but wax and a cloth are much more efficient. Why doesn't he just go to storage and get some more?

Then these other times, he'll wrap his arms around me and move his mouth. I wish he would have given me sound sensors of some sort. I have absolutely no clue as to what he is telling me! He'll speak for hours on end, looking at me with those #0000FF colored eyes of his. But it is nice, I suppose, spending time with my creator. I know for a fact he doesn't spend nearly as much time with dispenser and teleporter, I wonder why that is.... This is, however, not the most complex thing that he's done. You see there was this one time where he began to take his artificial skin off of himself and-

Oh hey! There he is right now! And it looks like he brought me an upgrade, how lovely! Let's see...

LOADING
LOADING
LOADING
LOADING

Ah! It's the internet! So much information! So much delicious data! And, what's this?
Robot pornography? What is that?
...
...
...
Oh my-"
>> No. 388
Seriously, did I miss a memo or something...? Until this, when I clicked on a post's number, the board automatically linked it...

#13! I lol'd hard. Especially at the hexa. Awesome take on a machine's line of thinking, though I wouldn't have minded more sex... But really, you're credit to team.

On the idea of MPreg, uhh. Tenny and I were writing a tentamonster/Tentaspy story, where it sorrrrrta came to MPreg, with logical explanations. It's just, uhh. Kinda cutesy? Unless there's mass demand, it'll never see the board.

Though, now that I think of it... Tentamedic Mpreg would work.
>> No. 389
>>13
This is seriously great.
looking at me with those #0000FF colored eyes of hislolling forever
>> No. 390
>>7
MpregNo thanks, so far TF2 has managed to stay Mpreg-free and I hope it stays that way.
Also, try not to use words like "smex", it sounds too much like something an underage& would say.
>> No. 391
Requesting FemPyro/Sniper het because it's my OTP lololol. :B

Anything Demoman would be cool too.

Seriously, though, #50 intrigues me a lot. It reminds me of that Polish movie where there's these two women who look the same and one of them dies and the other feels like something's missing in her heart, even though they had no idea the other existed.

Uh, run-on sentences for the fail. :/
>> No. 393
>>7
I'm afraid I must object. >:I

>>17
#50 was written:

http://www.tf2chan.net/afanfic/res/275.html

Second post. Of course you'll hear no objections from me if someone wants to do it again!
>> No. 396
Ooh, thanks for the link Vector Kitten!
>> No. 400
10.is a Medic x Stephen Colbert fine too?
SOMEONE DO THIS
>> No. 401
#84 Spy & Pyro

http://www.tf2chan.net/afanart/res/430.html
>> No. 414
Someone do 10, please. It would make me happy in the pants.
>> No. 417
FUCKING SECONDING #88 PLZ.

(Also, is art acceptable for fulfilling the requests now or naw?)
>> No. 420
>>24
>>1
Instructions-1. Post a request in this thread! (Possibly like this: pairing/ >prompt - a situation, a kink, a song title, a quote, anything)2. Someone fills the request with fic or art!3. Read/look at porn. Awesome.
>> No. 433
I'm going to give #87 a try. Would whoever asked for it mind if I paired Engie/Sniper with Medic?

Just covering my bases here.
>> No. 435
I theenk the world needs MOAR Tentaspy....preferably molesting a Scoot.
Also, drools at the prospect that someone would do number 46....
>> No. 436
Request! Engineer catches Pyro air guitaring with his axe and shows him his guitar. Then he tries to show Pyro how to play it by putting his arms around him and moving Pyro's bare hands. Then sex and romance. And Pyro should be adverse to removing his gloves and later his suit and shouldn't take off his mask.
>> No. 444
Number 82 has been completed. *nods*
>> No. 455
>>26
Go for it!
>> No. 481
I think I can take a stab at either 14 or 44, it'll give me something to do. Maybe I'll do both

requesting Engineer/Scout - Engie snaps and takes out his frustration on Scout in the form of bondage-heavy hate sex.
>> No. 482
#47 done!

http://www.tf2chan.net/gmod/src/124461515789.jpg
>> No. 483
#14 done. Same-class sex, Spy/Spy.

Took one of my old (crap) Spy/Spy fics and rewrote it to make it less shitty.

~~~~~

He hated this feeling.

Hated the feel of the desk against his back. He hated the smell of smoke and the subtle touch of the other man's lips against his cheeks and neck. He hated those ghostly fingertips already under his clothes and roaming over his body. He hated everything about the man in red, pressing him into the table, those ghost-hands undoing his clothes.

But son of a bitch...

...he made it all feel so good...

The doors to the BLU intel room were locked, the briefcase of information having been knocked to the floor. The BLU Spy was sprawled out on the desk, engaged in a rather... animated game of tonsil hockey with his RED counterpart, who was rapidly tearing the other Spy's expensive suit open. Buttons popped their stitching and tapped against the walls and floor, fabric tore and ripped, and neither would be easy to replace in the middle of nowhere like this. With his chest now exposed, the RED tore away from the oral speulunking, trailing those lips down that toned, occasionally scarred skin. BLU moaned softly, aware of the ticking clock, and the hands fumbling with his belt. He was growing hot, his dick betraying his alliance and standing at attention by the time RED had ripped his pants away.

Fine leather fingers stroked and danced along the organ, each touch drawing a seductive moan or gasp from BLU's lips. It was times like this that he hated the other man, but he could barely master his own body when they crossed paths like this. The man in the other suit was the better Spy.

A tongue licked at the head of his cock, and BLU's body jerked. It was...unexpected. Was RED going to...?

Another lick. Then another. Then another. Then another. Then he was swallowed whole.

BLU bit his lip, trying to ignore the alarms going off, trying to ignore the animalistic desires inside him. He was a Spy! He was supposed to be doing the romancing, sweeping the unsuspecting off his feet but oh god this was heavenly. How he hated and loved RED at the same time. He needed more. His hand groped the air for RED, reaching until he felt the balaclava, his fingers gripping both fabric and hair, earing a grunt from the man sucking his penis.

His hips bucked. How long would he continue to tease!? How long until he could--

With a startled, and unexpected cry, he felt himself cum in RED's throat. For a moment, he felt dread, and then he saw RED peel himself off of himself, and swallow. RED wiped his mouth, and in one swift moment, flipped BLU onto his stomach. The Spy grunted, his body tensing when something cold and slimy pressed at his entrance.

He wouldn't...

A slick, leather finger slid inside of him. He felt his arms lock up, a digit wriggling and squirming inside of him. Then a second one joined, the two flexing and stretching his lovely French behind. RED's free hand was running along the inside of BLU's thigh, feeling the muscles, the skin.

"Prêt ou non..."

Before BLU could respond, he could feel RED push into him. Slow, and deep. He moaned, his back arching like he was stretching. Here they were, in the intel room, alarms going off around them and guns going off outside, fucking like rabbits.

And he would not have it any other way.

In and out, in and out, over and over with an ever-quickening rhythme, RED thrust into BLU, mumbling false promises of love. They both knew it meant nothing. Sex was sex, and the moment RED left, they would hate each other again. But this was their freedom.

They were free to fuck whomever they wanted.

There was no warning, in and out until he felt himself be filled, and heard RED's satisfying groan when he came inside his counterpart. This was it, their time was soon over. RED slid out, and BLU collapsed on the table, his pants around his ankles and his jacket in tatters. RED managed to stand up, and zip his clothes.

How he hated him...

...but it felt so good...

The bell rang.

"C'est ma queue de quitter..."

Before the BLU could protest, let alone peel himself off the desk, the RED Spy was fully clothed, and strolling out the door with the blue intelligence briefcase.
>> No. 496
Not sure if this is in any way related to the Kink Meme ethos... but didn't there used to be a beta thread for requesting betas? Did that survive the move? Or is it somewhere else?
>> No. 497
fff I hate to add to an already formidable list of requests, but I so want this done -- a fic-ification of Shyguy's cumbucket picture.

267
RED Medic kills BLU Medic in battle or something. BLU team is pissed and captures RED Medic. RED Medic has to fill BLU Medic's former, um, position(s).

Bonus points if RED Medic is also together (relationship-wise) with RED Heavy.
>> No. 506
Not sure if this is out of place but a continuation of the "Sniper & You" fic from one of the earlier kink memes would be cool.
>> No. 512
35
FFFFFFFFFFFFFFF SOMEONE PLEASE DO IT FOR JUSTICE
>> No. 516
>>36

Yeees seconding this so hard. The cliffhanger still kills me.
>> No. 534
#51, anyone? :<
>> No. 535
No seriously, why aren't there more disguised!Spy porns? I mean REALLY. It's a disguise! How deep does Spy get into those? And how deep can he go before the other team finds out??
>> No. 537
>>35
Seconded. Also throwing in a formal request for ficcification of Wat's comic just because. From Medic's POV.
>> No. 539
>>36

Yes. A thousand times, yes!
>> No. 577
Heavy/Sandvich food porns?
>> No. 578
taking
28
49
51
60
I'll work on them sporadically, but I needed to let that be known that I call dibs.

As for me, I'd like to see some Scout/Spy [in that order], in which someone meddles with the unlabeled bottles in Medic's labs and finds out exactly how potent a horny German's chemical experiments for aphrodisiacs can be.
Please make it consensual, too much raep of the rape concept makes me sad.
>> No. 580
>>43

Tenny did this. She had an awesome class/object thread on the old chan.
>> No. 581
>>44

I... I love this prompt and I am going to start working on it immediately holy crap.

#82 also intrigues me and I'll get working on that when I finish Chrono Trigger.

I suppose I'm calling "dibs" or whatever on those prompts but if anyone else wants to write their own versions they should feel free to. :v
>> No. 582
>>43
>>45

It's kinda lolporn, but here it is in it's short-ass, reposty glory:

Heavy/Sandvich.

When Doktor was not around, Heavy went for the next best thing.

He took the toothpick out of the bread and after popping the olive into his mouth, threw it to the side somewhere, not wanting to choke on it, like he did the first time he got himself worked up like this.

He took a bite out of it, chewing very slowly, savoring the taste of it-- And with one hand, he reached down and began to rub at his quickly growing erection.

He licked between the slices of bread, tasting the cheese and meat and delicious tomatoes, pausing only to finish chewing and take another bite.

He couldn't handle the heat anymore and set the sandvich down only momentarily- Long enough to remove his pants.

He wrapped one of his oversized hands around his cock and began to stroke himself as he took another large bite, the sandvich almost completely gone.

The moment he took the final bite, he came- An explosion of flavor, if you will.
>> No. 587
>>46
:) I leave the prompt in your good hands then, my fair lady.
I don't call 'dibs' so much as saying 'Hey! Nipples wants to do these!'
>> No. 602
New request heeeeah: Pyro/Scout. For some reason, Scout pisses off Pyro, so Pyro decides to get revenge on Scout. Fire/heat/hot wax/branding is involved. Not exactly rape, and please don't make Pyro a /complete/ creeper. I want it to become more consentual as the fic goes on, and I want Scout to end up with a permanent mark from one of the brands, a scar to remind him of his hottest lover. (Oh, that sounds so cheesy)
>> No. 607
>>49 Is it same team or opposing?
>> No. 633
Dear #91, please happen, thanks.
>> No. 696
>>50

Same team, I guess. I really don't care.
>> No. 740
>>35
FFFFFFFFFFFFF-
WANT WANT WANT WANT
>> No. 744
I know this isn't the right place to ask, but I can't think of where it should go- wtf happened to Miscommunication? Sniper/Spy fic, quite hot.
>> No. 748
I could be wrong, but I think it got reposted here. I forget who wrote it. Was that Vector Kitten's?

cause if so, hello, please write more of that :B
>> No. 751
I thought it had, too, but when I went to reread it yesterday, I couldn't find it anywhere. much sadness was mine.
>> No. 752
Check the archives. There's a link to them under the FAQ on the front page.
>> No. 753
Tried that, too. Not there.
>> No. 754
>>54
>>55

Yes, Vector wrote the Miscommunication fic, but she requested that it be removed because she wanted to rework it.
>> No. 767
>>59

Good to know! Thanks, I'm glad to hear it's not lost forever.
>> No. 1053
sniper/scout: sniper likes scout's feet. PLEASE anon i don't care if it's a footjob or a foot massage or what JUST GIMME SOME FEET.
>> No. 1054
>>61 o-or if anyone has that "scout has a leg cramp and medic makes sniper deal with it" fic from the old chan that would be great too :'Vc
>> No. 1057
>>63
It's already been reposted: third page, titled Cramps.
>> No. 1062
>>63 oh, thanks very much anon! guess i missed it. <:3c sorry about that!
>> No. 1094
I requested this on the Layton meme, but noone there's played TF2 and so I don't think it'll ever be filled.

Anyways.

Spy with this guy: http://tinyurl.com/ko4rzp, or Scout with this guy: http://tinyurl.com/mhqesb
First guy's Professor Layton, he's more or less a perfect English gentlemen/archaeologist/puzzle master. Second's his apprentice, in fanon he's much like Scout in being the game's whore and he's very snooty.

I don't know either. Can anyone fill this?
>> No. 1095
Continuation of the Sniper and You fic is most definitely want.
>> No. 1101
Would definately wish to attempt 38.

Request: Some adorable Spyro. And I don't mean the dragon.
>> No. 1102
>>67
this is the first time i've ever seen "spyro" and "adorable" in the same sentence <:Vc
>> No. 1103
>>65

Well, that's, uh, one of the more interesting requests I've heard.
>> No. 1109
>>68

Well, is it really that hard to imagine? There was this one comic I saw, where the Pyro was all alone at his birthday. And suddenly, a Spy appears! You think a backstab will happen but then, the Spy gives Pyro a present. And it is the most adorable thing ever.
>> No. 1116
I believe our confusion occurs due to the fan character "Spyro," who is a Spy frequently pretending to be a Pyro, home-made flamethrower and all. His entire team hates him because he talks entirely in 4chan memes and does everything 4 teh lulz. He spends entire battles griefing his own team.

Also I think he is Mexican? The chan moved before I could find his origional story.
>> No. 1117
>>71

Ahh! I see. I mean Spyro as in the pairing, Spy/Pyro. Because there needs to be more of that.

Sorry for the confusion!
>> No. 1126
So long as we are on the subject, we need more of both kinds of Spyro.
>> No. 1136
>>69

Yeah, I know.
I don't know how I thought of it. I really have no idea what the hell made me think of something like that request, but now I really really want to see one of them. afdgg
>> No. 1177
67.Tentaspy medic? Im sure medic would love to dissect him. He could use the syringe gun to drug him. Or he plans to but, the drug is not as potent as he thought/ doesn't effect tentaspy ....
Cockblockily short because I just can't find it within me to write Octopus/Nazi porn with people around. MY DIGNITY, LET ME HAVE IT



Medic had read as a child of uncharted Africa and great white hunters bringing down its strange beasts, things with horns and beaks and twisted features. All childhood fancy, of course; that particular frontier had been well-explored by the time he was old enough to understand the joy of discovery, the thrill of pinning down something new and claiming it as your own. The tyranny of maps, his teachers had said, and so he had turned to smaller, more internal mysteries- the limits of human bodies, the splendour of the will to live. But here, here...

He hauled the creature up on to a table, tentacles spilling over the edges. The thing weighed about as much as the man it resembled, and moving it had put his arms to straining. A small complaint: a dead weight was always easier to lift than a struggling, thrashing one, and generally made for a far more cooperative patient.

It was the work of a moment to strap the creature's arms down to the sides of the table. All new discoveries came with danger, but usually that was to the patient; as a man of learning, Medic was generally unappreciative of being in harm's way, current situation included. After a moment, another vial of barbituates followed. Those tentacles really were quite unsettling.

"Well," he said, to the thing, "shall we get started?"

The thing had a pulse, although slow compared to Medic's own racing one. Perhaps the thing was exothermic? Amphibious? It /was/ breathing with reptilian slowness, although perhaps that was a just side-effect of being cursed, for whatever reason, with Spy's terrible nose. It was a fate Medic would not wish on any man or beast (or hideous mix thereof). The man /snorted/, for pity's sake.

The thing did look uncannily like their Spy, apart from the rather obvious abberations. Medic idly touched the exposed skin at the base of its neck. Warm and dry, with no hint of scaling or clammy, amphibious skin... and yet, the thing's tentacles were slippery and smooth, inhuman. One had wrapped around his ankle down there in the sewer, before the sedatives had had a chance to kick in. It had been cold and muscular, inhumanly strong. Medic rubbed the toe of one boot against his still-aching ankle. Man and beast, together! It was the stuff of cheap science fiction novels, of terrible rubber-suit movies.

He would have to find out where man ended and beast began, wouldn't he...?

The first few buttons on the shirt came away easily enough, revealing nothing but healthy human skin underneath, and a chest that rose and fell with every slow breath. Medic glanced up at the thing's face, but it slept on. He felt the slow beat of its heart against his palm, then slid his hand lower.

His heart was in his mouth as he worked on the buttons, mind flipping through hypotheses one after another. Respawn accident? Teratogens? Strange government experiments? Or perhaps those very odd woodcuts from Japan were to blame...

Medic was leaning over the thing's body, gloved hands fumbling with buttons and desperate to see the junction between man and creature, when he became aware of four things. The first was that in his eagerness, his legs were among the mass of tentacles overhanging the bottom of the table. The second was that the creatures's heartbeat was thumping quite healthily against his forearm. The third, when he looked up, was the tentacles that had slipped up the side of the table and tugged open the bonds around its wrists.

The fourth was the creature's grin.

"Hello," the thing said.

Medic screeched and tried to run it through with the bonesaw.

Moments later, upside-down on the floor with a monster pinning him down, he considered that maybe that had not been the best way to open communications. Then again, ambushing it in its lair, riddling it with syringes, and dragging it back to dissect had probably not been the best start, either.

The creature leant forward, stretching in a way that sent a chill up his spine. It peered down at him, looking pleased. "Ah, docteur? Please, do not let me interrupt your examination." Tentacles curled firmly around Medic's wrists and ankles.

Medic swallowed. "I do believe," he managed, only a little squeakily, "that I am quite done for the day. Now, if you'll excuse me..." Medic pulled away, a dozen little suckers leaving welts in their wakes.

The creature pulled him back, never once dropping the polite, pleased face. "Non, non, I assure you. You have gone to all this effort..." It grinned. "Continue."

Those last few buttons hid the space between man and beast, and information was information, after all... He reached for the last few buttons, all that was seperating the pale human skin from dark tentacles. Stitched together? Backwards evolution? Human mutation? His hands trembled.

The tentacles on his wrists pulled his hands away, and the creature grinned at him like he was a waywards puppy. "Ah, there is nothing of note there, docteur, but..." The tentacles snaked up Medic's body. The grin darkened.
>> No. 1180
Or perhaps those very odd woodcuts from Japan were to blame...
If tentacles are involved, Japan is almost always to blame.
>> No. 1202
Finished #58
>> No. 1206
Its not precisely porn-ish, but there doesn't seem to be another place to put it.

Vampire!Scout. It's hilarious, and you know it. He's still hyper and annoying, he just sucks blood too. (normally he does fine feeding off the opponents, but he might beg some off his teammates after a bad streak; they give it just to shut him up)

Also sometimes he is a bat-wielding bat.
>> No. 1229
Or perhaps those very odd woodcuts from Japan were to blame...
I instantly lol'ed at this line.
>> No. 1239
had a great idea while watching meet the scout! :0 I think it'd be awesome if someone did something along the lines of this:

scout tries to run out of the warehouse we see in the beginning of the video, but he's not quite quick enough, or distracted, or SOMEthing, and ends up getting stuck in the door on his stomach. gangrape ensues.

go do it.
>> No. 1248
Sudden idea! Left 4 Dead and TF2 crossover. The prompt is simply a pairing.

Louis and Demoman.
>> No. 1249
I AGREE WITH MILK
>> No. 1253
That sinper and you fic deffenitly needs to be continued. I'll die if it isn't lol.

I can't believe I am the only one who wants someone to do #70. The whole reason I came back here was to see if anyone requested it. Very awesome idea.

Also, #45. SNIPER RAPE VAN FTW.
>> No. 1398
Idea! Sunburnt!Scoot x Sniper, 'unauthorised' use of aloe cream... if-ya-know-what-i'm-sayin'
>> No. 1434
>>75

Please tell me this will be continued.
>> No. 1437
>>85

oh yes!! I second that. with tanlines too, that'd be just wonderful.
>> No. 1442
AWWW YEEAAAH
>> No. 1446
i might be interested in doing 49 but i won't give any promises.
>> No. 1460
Pyro doesn't really get a whole lot of love does he? I was thinking maybe Pyro/Engineer. I mean, with a lot of spy checking surely some kind of bonding happens, right?
>> No. 1488
I've nabbed several of these (to be announced later), but if you're writing one and someone posts it before you, I can still post it right?
>> No. 1489
>>91
NO GO AWAY WE DON'T WANT EXTRA PORN

post it dorkface post it post it post it
>> No. 1495
>>90
agreed agreed
>> No. 1497
PYRO/ENGIE = OM NOM NOM
>> No. 1501
Requesting SCOUT AND YOU so badly fff.
>> No. 1502
How about female Pyro x Scout's Mom?
>> No. 1503
seconding scout and you request
>> No. 1504
THIRDing Scout and You.
>> No. 1516
Fourthing Scout/You, SO HARD.
>> No. 1517
Fifthing Scout/You. And 'fifthing' isn't even a word.
>> No. 1518
Sixing Scout/You, and I don't even CARE if sixing isn't a word, someone just make this happen.
>> No. 1519
seventhing for scout/you
>> No. 1520
eighththing ScoutYou
>> No. 1521
Ninthing ScoutYou.
>> No. 1522
>>97
>>98
>>99
>>100
>>101
>>102
>>103
>>104
Oh wow. That's almost too much.
However, I am a bit of a writefag, and may try some of these, if anyone minds? 11, 14, 40, 48, and 60 interest me most, so unless the mods have a problem, I'll probably post a little something in here.
>> No. 1536
I don't know if this has ever been done, but:

RED Spy meets Scout's Mom for a dinner date. Wining, dining, one thing leads to a bedroom... and then he discovers she's a trap. Specifically, the BLU Spy in disguise...
>> No. 1537
>>106

THIS THIS THIS THIS THIS FUCKING THIS.
>> No. 1539
>FUCK MOTHERING YES
>> No. 1656
After seeing so much A x B (B is sekrit spy!) We clearly need something where (for example) Pyro and Demo are making out, but BOTH are Spies in disguise! Then the real Pyro and Demo walk in.
>> No. 1659
>>109
wol and i were joking once about writing a series in which scout goes and gets the entire team to fuck him one by one and when he gets to spy, it is revealed that scout was a spy.

/this team's/ spy.

and the spy he was just trying to get with was the other team's spy disguised as this spy.

IT'S LIKE AN ONION
>> No. 1660
>>110

I would enjoy this.
>> No. 1661
Requesting Sniper/Spy, injuredfic. Both are badly hurt after their team wins a battle (not immobile, but enough to be in pain when they move around too much), but they still want to have their own little celebration. Cue soft, awkward, pained sex.
>> No. 1662
>>112
I forgot to add: bonus points if they become frustrated and decide to throw all caution to the wind, and end up opening their own or each other's wounds.
>> No. 1664
>>79

I'd do this, since I sort of lacked creativity and wanted to write a semi-serious version of the THIGHFUCKING fic.

The thing is, there'd probably be so much lead up until I actually got it to /afanfic/ material.
>> No. 1665
10thing Scout/You :3
>> No. 1666
Sniper/Jar of jarate, in the vein of 1guy1jar.

No, I'm serious about this.
>> No. 1668
>>116
D:
>> No. 1670
>>116
DO NOT WANT
>> No. 1671
>>116

The horrible, evil, little troll in me who sees potential for hilarity in shit like this wants to see this done.
>> No. 1672
>>119.

The same part of me that wants the Scout x Scout necrophilia story finished wants to see this done. Though I will probably end up doing my own prompt.
>> No. 1674
>>116
Not sure if want.
>> No. 1677
>>121

Oh, but you do.

But if nobody does this, at least do Heavy/sandvich.
>> No. 1683
>>116

I'm gonna go draw that now.
>> No. 1702
>>123

WHY!?
>> No. 1708
>>124 because it will be hilarious.
>> No. 1710
>>116
I think I've seen somebody do that before already, except it was two Snipers.
>> No. 1711
>>126
*Course that doesn't mean others can't do it either.
>> No. 1721
sup i'm thinking i'd like to take a stab at some of these. liking the idea of sniper's raep van, medic/heavy cheese, scout/sniper and their adventure to the outback steakhouse, medic/scout doktor porn, annnnd i guess engie/sentry fer the lulz.
i'm a writer, so i'll get it going asap i guess.

also, i'm thinking some sniper/sniper? same team, opposite teams, DOES IT MATTER?
>> No. 1725
>>126
2 girls 1 cup is very very different than 1 guy 1 jar.
>> No. 1744
I second #70.

For some twisted reason I enjoy Puddles. 8U
>> No. 1756
... I may consider doing one or two of these. Numbers 1 and 26 are probably most obvious right now, maybe 73. 75 was something I had suggested, and Ten Cent bastard and Thinking Cap and I were going to write it as a collab fic, but it never panned out, and I may end up doing a different version than we had planned and have it be a companion piece to Respawn of the Dead.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT DO YOU GUYS THINK?
>> No. 1757
I think some collabing might get some of these requests written faster. Some can be thrown together so two birds can be killed with one stone. Or three, four, whatever.
Some have already been done so I don't know why they're still there. We should have a second Kink thread for completing the requests since this one is overloaded with requests and people thinking about doing some and only a handful of actual fics.
>> No. 1764
loving this kink meme :D
>> No. 1765
btw stubs equals anon #128.

i'm posting some shit hopefully so i figured a name was in order.
>> No. 1778
I only discovered this place the other day. I'm totally hooked, you guys are fabulous.

Can I request some jealosy kinky sex based on the game mechanic? For instance, Scout and Spy do a similar job in combat (reporting on what the opposition is up to) yet I imagine that purely because he's visible, Scout'd get all the glory and praise, while Spy is stuck with his slimy stereotype.

Or similarly, Spy jealous of Engineer, with his PhD, making these amazing beautiful contraptions and all he can do is destroy them. Or even an academic jealosy between Engie and Medic, with the former thinking he's a 'real' doctor, and Engie one in name only.
>> No. 1783
>>135

Seconded!
>> No. 1784
I've had another thought... the team discover that their opposites on the battlefields are identical to them in every way, and launch a competition to see who can sleep with their double first. Sounds easy enough, but contemplate the logistics and ego of sleeping with yourself... perhaps Spy doesn't succeed at all, as he (and therefore his double) won't let himself be seduced. Scout might be the obvious success, being so enraptured with himself; Heavy trying to trick himself I imagine would be full of confusion and adorable. Maybe Demoman is on it, but they're both too pissed to get it up.

Who wins? (if anyone?)
>> No. 1786
pyro blows stickies off of engineers erected dispenser
>> No. 1787
Continuing of the Sniper/You Fic in the first kink meme thread.Doctor/Patient style Medic/You
I will love you for this FOREVER.
>> No. 1790
>>137

I like. The Demoman part the most, because I'm a sucker for badsex.
>> No. 1793
Dibs on number 2.



Sniper/You's author from the first kink meme has gone AWOL. I beta-ed some of her work but then she sort of phased out- I don't know if she's still around in the fandom or not.
>> No. 1795
>>141

So that means that a continuation can be done by anyone, yes?
>> No. 1796
>>142

That's what I was thinking when I posted (139), as long as continuing author credits, of course.
>> No. 1806
>>142
>>143

I personally wouldn't as it's not my story and I sort of consider that to be in bad taste, but I'm not one to say you can or can't.
>> No. 1830
49.How about some SniperxScout? Poor Scoot drops Sniper's favorite gun and breaks it. And then Sniper gets pissed and they have angry hate-sex. :C

Sorry if the accents are screwy or wrong.
I guess this thing might be set in a 2fort-esque map that has been muddled with because I feel like it.

*


Another boring day at the red base, Scout noted dourly. Fighting had stopped for a couple weeks and wouldn't start up again for a while. The news had come to the team welcomed with open arms, but within the first couple days everyone had noticed how boring things were getting.
After attempting to get everyone he came across to play baseball with him, Scout had retired to the courtyard and was batting by himself.
"Fuckin' down time," he yelled as he tossed the worn ball up again, only to bat it violently against the wall with a metallic thud. "Can't believe I'm this flippin' bored already!"
The young man cursed to himself as he hit the ball a couple more times and ended by flinging the bat up to the respawn room.
Maybe he could run around the base again and challenge everyone to a race.
Last time he tried that though, he was smacked upside the head with a shovel, but he was so bored and the beat down didn't make an impression on his brain like it was intended to so he was enchanted with the idea.
Racing up the stairs he quickly stopped, though. Leg set up behind him, he snapped his head over to the chainlink fence, eyes spotting something of interest beyond the cut-out cow and various other unused pieces of equipment.
"Y'know, I haven't seen sniper in a while," he mused aloud, probably the only musing he could do. "Let's go say hi."
Scout raced over to the fence and climbed over it, not bothering to perhaps use the normal entrance like most people would. This was a bit more fun than that, and even though it didn't provide much of a challenge for him, it was more work than just running around and kicking open a gate.
Racing over to the sniper's nest, he hurriedly climbed up the thing and peeked around when he reached the entrance. Sniper was by the window polishing one of his guns as he looked over to see who was intruding.
"Why am I not surprised?" Sniper mumbled slightly before returning to his work, placing the sniper rifle back in it's case. The Australian knew there was to be trouble, even if he wasn't sure what it'd be just yet.
"Yo chucklenuts," Scout taunted as he hopped up, allowing himself in. Poking around at the various knick-knacks pinned to the walls or set around he plopped down across from the sniper, resting his elbow on the poorly nailed window pane.
"What do ya' want, Scout?" Sniper asked, staring intently at the scout while waiting for his answer.
"Just bored, y'know?"
"Not my problem, do I look like a babysitta'?"
Jumping out of his seat, Scout shrugged at that and took to looking around again. He would've came back with a couple insults of his own if he weren't so bored and unwilling to either be kicked out of the nest Sparta style or have piss thrown on him.
That was when he spied the rifle, neatly polished and set in it's case. The shine on the barrel of the gun sparkled in his eye for a second before he leapt forward, unable to resist the temptation to grab.
"Neat gun ya' got here," he said as he pulled the thing from it's case, Sniper's eyes widening as he in turn jumped forward to grab it from Scout's hands.
"Oi! I just polished the thing," he hissed, gripping the gun firmly and pulling it from Scout, who just held on tighter. "Don't bloody touch it."
"Hey, what's a matter with ya? I'm just takin' a look," Scout shot back, playing an almost tug of war with the thing. However, the monstrous glare behind Sniper's glasses had him let go of the thing quickly.
Evidently, Sniper hadn't been holding onto the rifle as tightly as Scout had assumed, and in a painfully slow arc the gun swooped up in the air and out the window. The both of them froze and watched in an obscene horror as the rifle flew out from the window and hit the ground below.
Scout turned his head slowly back to the Sniper, anticipating his reaction. Normally he'd throw a couple insults out there, laugh his ass off, and hop down and run away, but this was... pretty damn serious, to say the least.
"Yer gonna pay for that," Sniper hissed as he knocked the Scout back against the wall, pinning him.
"Yo! What's ya problem?!"
Scout struggled, bare arms garnering a couple scratches and splinters as the Sniper just gripped harder in order to keep the struggling youth captured. After panicking for a good moment and then realizing all Sniper was doing was pining him to the wall, Scout stopped and waited to see what Sniper had in store for him.
Growling slightly and pressing the other's bare arms against the wall for a second or two again, Sniper quickly let go and pushed the kid over to the entrance of the nest.
"Get down there and get my gun," he ordered.
"Ya don't gotta be so flippin' rough," Scout protested, but started down the ladder with Sniper climbing after. "Freakin' Snipers always got a bug up their ass or somethin'."
Now that he was no longer directly in danger of a brutal beat down from the sharpshooter (who Scout swore turned green for a good second or two) he let out a string of insults and accusations to the Aussie, receiving no response in return. Sprinting over to where the rifle lay, Scout picked the thing up as gingerly as he could and looked at it. As far as he could tell, it was busted... he didn't know too much about sniper rifles or anything but he was pretty sure they could not be broken up into three individual pieces.
"Uh, I think it's busted."
"Ya' think?"
"Hey, it's not my fuckin' fault!"
Sniper quickly snatched the pieces from Scout's hands, looking them over before raising a hand to rub at his temples and massage his forehead, visibly ready to blow up.
"Not your fault, eh? Maybe if ya' touch it, it wouldn't be like this!"
"Ya' told me to let go of it and I let go, not my fault! Y'know I wonder how ya' became a sniper with a bad grip like dat."
Nearly moving to sucker punch the Scout, who was now pretty much prancing about with his chin held high at finding such a good excuse to place the blame elsewhere, Snipe stopped himself. Had he not been wearing his sunglasses, Scout might've noticed the glint of a fairly evil idea blossoming in his mind. Either way, the unruly boy probably would be too busy commenting more on having a 'good grip' while swinging his bat around. Some days he could rant more than Soldier, really.
"Yer gonna fix this, mate," Sniper started, bringing the boy back to earth and stopping him midmonologue. "To my bunk, now."
"I just said I didn't do a thing, dumbass."
"It's either you get in the van or you'll find a kukri lodged in yer throat."
Scout decided that he'd cooperate for now, especially since a baseball bat would not fare all too well against a giant knife.
"I don't think I'm gonna be able to fix this thing if that's what you're gettin' at," Scout said as he walked towards the beaten up van that served as Sniper's bunk.
Around here, bunks were mostly make-shift. Most days Scout dozed off underneath the stairs in the courtyard.
There were rooms available but no beds, and no one particularly cared to share rooms so everyone just kind of claimed a spot and stuck to it.
Sniper thanked the gods that he had his dingy old van. He was a solitary creature who didn't come out to the base much unless he needed something. Normally along the way he was bugged by anyone he came across, so he made it a point to visit as little as possible and keep food runs solely to nighttime.
Once the two got to the van, Scout impatiently waited by the door, shifting from left to right foot. Even as daft as he was made out to be, he could tell Sniper wasn't planning anything good. The only thing that kept at least one foot planted at the side of the van was a morbid curiosity.
Sniper opened the door and climbed inside, not caring to tidy up the place any. Scout followed after, a moment of hesitation keeping him outside for a second or two.
"Ya' ever think about cleanin' this place?!"
"Piss off."
"Woah woah woah, alright then. What did ya' want anyway?"
Now that he had lured the idiot over, Sniper snapped the door shut with a swift kick and locked the thing. He removed his hat and place it on a slightly out of place bedside table. Taking in the confused and just slightly horrified stare, Sniper moved forward. That look just fueled him into attacking, ready to extract a somewhat unorthodox revenge.
"What do ya' think you're doin?"
Scout panicked again and attempted to jump out of the way, but Sniper pounced back and a small fight ensued. Fists flew here and there, not with intentions of seriously harming either of them. Scout was trying desperately to get out of Sniper's grip, thinking he was going to get the mauling of a life-time, and Sniper was countering the attacks best he could while trying to throw a couple here and there until the boy submitted.
"Get offa' me!"
"Hold still wanka'."
Sniper managed to get a grip on the Scout's arm and snaked another hand to the other's waist, gripping with a bruising strength while Scout turned around and was trying to make his way to the back of the van and out the (to his knowledge) unlocked door.
He turned around to swing at the Sniper, who shifted left and right as he pulled back. A tug-of-war broke out, and getting inspiration from the incident back at the nest, Sniper immediately let go of Scout, who face-planted into the door.
"What the fuck!"
Without so much as a minute down and trying to ease the pain in his nose, Scout found his hat smacked right off. The headset follow suit, crashing against the side of the van.
"Oh now you're in for it dumbass!"
Scout bounded up head first, connecting with the Sniper's chin, sending the man stumbling backwards. The move had surprised him and with the initial shock worn off, he swore he felt a crack in his mouth and hoped nothing had chipped.
"I told ya' to hold still," he hissed between his teeth, and upon gripping at them with dirty fingers found them to be in working shape. Scout was trying to get the door open, so Sniper found his opening to attack again. Quickly shoving the other against the wall, Sniper pressed his body to Scout's forcefully and bit down on the crook of his neck. His waist thrust forward into the Scout, letting him know that this wasn't just some pointless beat down.
"Fuck, fuckin' fag!"
Scout pressed his hands against the wall and tried to make some space between the front of his body and the van, but Sniper adjusted his stance and knocked back again with his hips a bit more forcefully. To anyone outside the van, the car probably would've lurched backwards a little at that.
"Ya' owe me for the gun," Sniper hissed into Scout's eat, letting his teeth sink into the side of his neck again after that. This was beginning to get a little more animalistic and violent than he originally pictured, but it was all good.
"I don't owe you nothin'!" Scout groaned, wiggling about, trying to get out of the pin. He knocked his elbow back against the Sniper, who let out an 'oof' before pinning both arms down with his own gloved hands. Fingers moved up from gripping the other's wrists, slowly but cautiously, up the back of bandaged hands and made their way in between Scout's fingers. They gripping his hands possessively, short nails making sure to dig a little in his palms when met with resistance of any sort.
Sniper took to necking and grinding against the Scout's backside, who seemed to be getting slightly into it himself. Still, he had a reputation to uphold and submitting too early in the game wasn't acceptable. Scout still tried to move his arms back to connect with the Sniper, but it was pretty much useless at this point; he had also found out that trying to back his hips and gain and entryway with that technique didn't do much either.
"F-fucking fag," Scout growled as he felt the back of his neck being bitten and sucked on lightly.
Sniper moved a hand down to the Scout's front now that he didn't seem to be putting up much resistance, chin planted firmly on the other's shoulder as he grinned a little. "Doesn't seem like I'm the only fag here, eh?"
With a hand cupping Scout's erection, he massaged lightly. Scout felt really weird right now, questioning his sexuality slightly, but pushing the questions to the near far-corners of his brain. Besides, any guy in his situation would've had the same reaction. It was perfectly okay.
"There we go," Sniper cooed and pried him off of the side of the wall, dragging Scout over to the dirty mattress. Moving his hand back up, Sniper gripped Scout's shoulder and pinned him down against the bed. His other hand roamed under Scout's shirt and up his spine and down again before spindly fingers moved to undo the boy's belt and whip it out quickly, tossing it aside. Fingers deftly undid the button and unzipped the front. Sniper was surprised he had not seen any other forms of protest from Scout, and to test whether he was still there and not just drifting off he gave his hips another thrust forward.
"Ah, what the fuck!"
"Surprised I haven't had to tie ya' down yet," Sniper remarked with a slight smirk as he saw Scout protest by suddenly trying to jolt out from underneath him. He wasn't sure whether he liked the boy wiggling around and fighting back or going along with whatever was in store.
It was definitely more fun when given a challenge.
"Wot? You want to be tied down?" he offered, watching Scout snap his head around and give a defiant glare before trying to make a get-away. Sniper countered this by gripping both wrists and pinning them with a single hand, using his weight to keep his down, left hand working on pulling down Scout's pants. "It's unlike you to be so bloody calm."
"Yeah yeah," Scout countered weakly, just wanting to continue. He hadn't done anything with anybody in a long time now and all he really wanted was a release, even if it meant getting it from Sniper. He just didn't want to completely destroy what would be left of his pride.
Sniper was pretty amusing, unwilling to let such an opportunity go to waste. Moving his hand onto the square of Scout's back and pressing the other down again, the other went right to Scout's boxers and inside. Rubbing the already hardened member, he observed the contorted expression on Scout's face as he continued for another moment or two before stopping.
"Wh-why'd ya' do that?"
"Just ya' wait."
Sniper reached over to the small desk perched next to the mattress, digging through the thing with one hand. He wasn't sure where he was, as he hadn't used it in a long time, but eventually he found the bottle of lubrication he was looking for. Alas, he hadn't found a condom wrapper, but he wasn't really concerned.
"What's that?"
"How many bloody times do I got to tell ya' to wait?!"
"I don't like where this is goin'!"
"Aw shut ya' mouth."
Gritting his teeth slightly and smacking the other slightly on the back of the head, Sniper wasted no time in pulling his own cock from his pants and lubing it up. Scout shifted nervously underneath him, watching from the corner of his eye as the side of his face rested against the mattress.
"You're really not...."
"Give me a second and you'll get your answer."
Sniper himself felt pretty impatient, but he knew if he didn't stretch out the Scout a little bit beforehand it could turn bad quickly. A slicked down finger was inserted into the Scout, who didn't seem to take to the intruding digit well.
"Get that the fuck outta me!"
Scout wiggle away from the finger and lowered his hips to make it all the more difficult. The Aussie used the free hand that was planted firmly on Scout's back to hold him and at least keep him on the bed.
"I told ya' that ya' owe me," Sniper hissed, just about ready to lose his patience and just begin right there. Even if his position within the team made him waiting for hours to get a perfect shot, he wouldn't accept having to work as long or hard in the bedroom. "Now we can do this the easy way or the hard way, Scout."
"Fuckin'... fuck," Scout mumbled, officially submitting. Sniper noted how big an accomplishment this was mentally, but didn't waste another moment. Propping the Bostonian's hips up again he inserted a finger slowly, not taking much time before inserting another when Scout seemed accustomed and prepping the boy.
Deciding he'd get a little bit of payback, Sniper removed the fingers and guided his member over to Scout's entrance, waiting until the other noticed what was going on and about to protest again before thrusting forward, hand gripping on his hip as he wiggled himself all the way in.
"WHAT THE-" Scout was scrambling yet again, about ready to cry from the pain. Sniper seemed to either not care or not notice, as he slowly withdrew from the other and slammed back in, egged on by the various jumbles and combinations of curse words flying from the Scout's mouth. Sniper hurriedly began to pick up his thrusts, encouraged by all the noise coming from the human below him. If there was a better way to get back at the Scout, Sniper didn't know it.
At first the thrusts were almost too painful to bear, and Scout was tearing up at the unfamiliar pain. Why the hell had he been so quick to let this happen, anyhow?! With each thrust he began to grow accustomed to the feeling and... it was actually somehow beginning to feel kind of.... good.
Originally cringing in pain, Scout now was biting at his bottom lip in an attempt to keep quiet, eyebrows furrowed as Sniper ran over a particularly sensitive spot. The growing pressure and pleasure combined with the pain felt a lot better than it should've. Soon Scout was moaning, language still pretty foul, but now for different reasons.
Sniper, too, seemed to be enjoying himself. Looking back to see his reaction, Scout turned a brighter red. The feeling was beginning to become unbearable, and he was near the edge of orgasm. He moved a hand down to stroke himself now that he was free. It wasn't soon after that he came, trying to catch his breath as Sniper finished up and collapsed on the Scout.
"Next time don't touch my bloody gun."

*

I'M FINALLY DONE WITH THIS THING. i'm going to bed now, it's been long overdue.
>> No. 1832
>>144

Hm, yeah, (but I want it so bad!), did anyone around here even know the OP? Wasn't named.
>> No. 1833
kicked out of the nest Sparta style
Doh ho ho.

Not bad, but it's in desperate need of a beta.
>> No. 1835
>>145
touch his gun more, scout! :D
>> No. 1836
>>147

Yeah I wrote it in notepad at six in the morning. I will also note that this entire week I have been only receiving at most, five hours of sleep.
Sorry. D:
>> No. 1840
I feel sort of guilty about posting a request because there are already a shit-ton of them, but I'll do it anyway.

Requesting the making of the Meet the Spy video from the classes' POVs. The entire set-up is a ruse purely for the sake of filming the video. Everyone is acting, therefore the Sniper is not actually dead as the Spy waltzes in with him over his shoulder, nor is the Medic actually hurt by the RED Spy's judo chop.

Something fairly lighthearted or comedic would be nice. Really, I just wanna see the Sniper bitching about the Spy manhandling him while having his butt in his face!
>> No. 1847
Second.
>> No. 1849
Third.
>> No. 1850
>>152

Fourthed.
>> No. 1851
Fifth.
>> No. 1852
SIXTHED.
>> No. 1855
SEVENTHED
>> No. 1872
61, 63, and 64 scare me.

Someone needs to do them!
>> No. 1873
>>157

63 & 64 need to be the endings of the Scout/You fics. NEED.
>> No. 1874
#38 is in progess gentlemans

will be posted in delicious slices for every team member. Scoot is first because i'm a biased bich.

any req for who should be next?
>> No. 1875
>>159

Female char will be...? A class/you, a maid? Can't wait, though.
>> No. 1876
its along the lines of ouran high host club, for those who are animufags

female in disguse, basically. though there needs moar class/you
>> No. 1877
>>161

There needs to be another Medic or Sniper & you. Waiting for the current Scout/yous to be finished.
>> No. 1878
>>146
Yes, I was the one that betaed for her. She hasn't responded to any of my emails for quite some time.
>> No. 1879
>>163

Huh. Oh well. On goes the circle of life in fanfiction.
>> No. 1886
>>162

'nother vote for moar Medic & You here...
>> No. 1892
#74 in progress.

it's started out pretty sappy too. (pun intended)
>> No. 1940
>>159
>>161
Never fucking write again or else I'll break your kneecaps.
>> No. 1951
Footjobs. I was going to write one with Scout and his socks, but I had no idea who to pair him with.

Also, >167, fucking marry me.
>> No. 1954
/r/ing a collective thread of Class/Yous. More simple that way.
>> No. 1970
>>168

I think you should write it with sniper or spy.
I don't know why, but I feel like they'd be the ones who would let him try it out.
>> No. 1983
>>168
Sasha
....seriously though, either sniper or soldier.
>> No. 1984
>>68
sniper seems the type imo.
>> No. 1996
>>170
>>171
>>172

I was actually considering Spy or Soldier among the people who would do it, the latter of the two I thought based on the fact that one could possibly be convinced that it's less homo than a hand job.

Fff. I shouldn't want to fufill my own kink.
>> No. 2043
>>168

You could pair him with Soldier to fulfill request #51
>> No. 2045
>>174

Yes that would make sense.
>> No. 2046
>>174
Ffff, I didn't even NOTICE request #51. I obviously fail.
>> No. 2299
...#52. Why won't anyone do #52?
>> No. 2317
Should things like #15, #37, and #57, and be removed? They're just pairing requests without an accompanying kink so they could easily be fulfilled by another request that does have a kink.
>> No. 2341
>>168

fapping at the prospect )': goddamn. anyone would be good, but my vote goes to sniper. it'd be nice if little ole scout got some nice, cummy soles at the end, too.
>> No. 2343
>>168 i vote for sniper too :O
>> No. 2345
>>168
Combine it with Soldier and kill two birds with one stone!
>> No. 2354
You make me roll, kinkmeme. Oh how I roll.

Also fuck you guys I don't think there's ENOUGH SpyEngie around him. Engie's chub you cannot resist.

I'm totally writing hot TentaSpy on Spy action, because it has to exist.

AND SPYSNIPER, because I think it's my OTP.
>> No. 2355
the least popular afanfic characters (heavy, demoman, soldier, and pyro) form a mantrain
>> No. 2370
Medic/Soldier or Medic/Heavy, realizing they've been trapped in Egypt's falling ceiling room. Not wimping out on inevitable crushing a must.

Obviously you can take a lot of artistic license with how fast the ceiling falls, or it'd be a very short fic.
>> No. 2379
>>184

YES. I've gone in there to my death far too many times. If I had to choose, I'd say Medic/Soldier since Solly doesn't get that much lurve. He can brace the ceiling with his rocket launcher to buy more time.

Might as well throw a request in too. How about a Soldier->Engineer<-Scout love triangle. Whether Engie cares one way or another about it is up to whomever. He could choose one of the two, or just like them in a platonic way, or have hots for another person altogether.
Either way, I just can't imagine Engie sitting around watching Soldier and Scout beat the crap out of each other over him, though.

Gah I'm confusing myself now.
>> No. 2384
I know something like this has already been written as The Naive Spy and its accompanying porn, but there seriously needs to be more like it.

I humbly request a very young, scared, almost jailbait Spy getting seduced/molested/raped by an older, predatory Spy (enemy or friendly, I don't care)
>> No. 2406
>>186
THIS
>> No. 2496
Some weird ones for you.

Medic visits IKEA and is so turned on and impressed by the Swedish efficiency that he gets a raging erection in the middle of the store.
How (and with who) he deals with this is up to you, though I like the idea of him rolling around on all the mattresses.

And another (stay with me)-

Spy has an unexpected, dainty hobby- cross-stitch, or knitting, or painting. Each of his creations is a devillishly erotic work featuring one or more of his teammates, though he'll only let himself act on his ideas once the work is finished (and if you do craft you'll know how long works can take!)
...is there one team mate/situation that makes him break the rules?
>> No. 2498
>>188
I like the spy craft idea. If it were me, i'd make the craft painting, with him painting sniper (the only guy who sits still long enough to draw/paint) but that's just me
the medic/ikea thing made me lol, very amusing
:D
>> No. 2503
>>188

Medic visits IKEA and is so turned on and impressed by the Swedish efficiency that he gets a raging erection in the middle of the store.
I SEE WHAT YOU DID THERE.
>> No. 2506
>>190

Tell me
For I am not entirely sure I know what I did there
>> No. 2507
>>191

http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/IKEAerotica
>> No. 2509
>>192

...oh, I see! For a second I was really excited because I thought I wasn't alone in wanting to see people writhing around at IKEA. Then I was ashamed.
>> No. 2510
>>193

Heh, I just thought you were being clever.
>> No. 2544
Something on Viaduct, please. On the lines of 'it's cold, let's warm up'. Doesn't have to be explicit. Demoman/anyone (except Heavy) or any two from Scout, Spy, Engi, Sniper group.
>> No. 2545
(except Heavy)
:(
>> No. 2549
FemPyro has "lady problems" and has to see the Medic. Funny "lady-parts" jokes and awkward situations. Comes from the stories we hear of perverted Gynos. I AM A FAGGOT HUMP MY RUMP "I'll be damned if I'm gonna let that crazy-ass German penetrate me with an iron stick!"
>> No. 2550
FemPyro has "lady problems" and has to see the Medic. Funny "lady-parts" jokes and awkward situations. Comes from the stories we hear of perverted Gynos. I AM A FAGGOT HUMP MY RUMP "I'll be damned if I'm gonna let that crazy-ass German penetrate me with an iron stick!"
>> No. 2571
>>196

Fucking seconded.
>> No. 2572
>>195
I now want to write this SPECIFICALLY with Heavy. Heck, the prompt even fits him the best - he's RUSSIAN, for crying out loud.
>> No. 2573
>>200

"In Motherland, we have special technique to stop from getting cold. Here, let me show you."
>> No. 2574
This is for drawer fags, I ask for more Nazi medic.
>> No. 2582
>>196
>>199
>>200

Ok, fine! I take it back. Write it with Heavy. Just make it good. :3
>> No. 2583
Gotta love how things work out. I AM A FAGGOT HUMP MY RUMP

I'd love to see a fic where two team members get separated from the group (fall off a cliff, get swept away by a river; the whole nine yards or whatever works) and they have to work together to get back to the base.

Any realizations of lurve and sexytimez during their trek will be more than welcome. >:3
>> No. 2584
>>204
Bonus points if they're naturally antagonistic classes (BLUspy/REDsniper springs to mind) from opposite teams, but are forced by circumstances to work together anyway to survive.
And, y'know, hatefucking is awesome.

...I might need to draw this.
>> No. 2588
Humbly requesting a Scout-centric fic where Scout is called a boy by one of the manlier classes (ie: Demo, Soldier, Sniper, Medic, Engie) and he insists that he AIN'T NO BOY, HE'S A MAN GODAMMIT. Said manlier class then proceeds to belittle him and insist that he is no man. Scout gets angrier, and eventually asks 'kay, so what do I need for you to think I'm a man, den?!' at which point said manlier class proceeds to plow his ass into next week.
Bonus points if more than one of the manlier classes teach our dear Scout this lesson in manhood.
Even more bonus points if our Scout gets batted around with his Sandman whilst this ass-plowing is happening because abuse is tasty.
>> No. 2589
>>206

Bonus points if more than one of the manlier classes teach our dear Scout this lesson in manhood.
Heavy and Medic. At the same time.

I would love to see this done.
>> No. 2590
>>207
Shit, somehow I left out Heavy in my list of manlier classes. Thanks for filling that in. That combination is lovely. I might actually write my own request lol. We'll see.
>> No. 2595
javascript:quote(206,%20'post2588');

scout+getting his ass plowed+ violence= WIN

Sinzekink must be fed. PLEASE FEED THE SIZEKINK HUNGER!
>> No. 2598
>>207

Do want.
>> No. 2603
>>207

Seconded.
>> No. 2612
>>209
>>210
>>211

Echoing do wants! I'll have to get this written then, won't I?
>> No. 2645
Not sure if it has been done so my apologies ahead of time, just in case.

I've always seen Heavy/Medic together in an established romance but never the initial start of the relationship. You can start from when they first meet on the team and develop it from there if you want.

Heavy and Medic's first sexing session would be epic.
>> No. 2704
I'm not really a guro fan, but I'd love to see some fic or art with Sniper getting whipped or flogged, Australian penal colony style.
>> No. 2859
A scene through Sniper's POV, he's messing with his scope during ceasefire when he spots an intimate scene (I don't care what the pairing is) and he decides to watch like the perv he is ;D

I totally got the idea from http://unirizz.deviantart.com/art/Tf2-kinky-meme-101304733 but as far as I know it hasn't been done yet.
>> No. 3010
HEAVY/MEDIC UBERSEX.

Which would be, of course, sex while both of them are ubercharged.

I GUESS IT WOULD HAVE TO BE A QUICKIE...
>> No. 3127
Okay, this has been said eleventy bagillion times and the Anon who wrote it is probably long gone, but I'd love more than anything to see the continuation of the 'Sniper and You' fic from one of the earlier kink threads.
>> No. 3838
/r/ing Medic/anyone, it just has to include the phrase "Fuck me like a Jewish whore!" Pretty please.


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