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Sandwich(Soldier/Medic/Heavy) (9)

1 .

So yeah, I was bored today and wrote some porn for someone on tumblr, thought I'd share it with you lovelies here. I'm super rusty, so be gentle, please.

~~

Sandwiched between two bodies, the Medic felt like he’d died and gone to heaven. There was a mouth firmly attached to his Adam’s apple, teeth worrying the bump just shy of hurting. The other was making a sloppy, suckling line of kisses down his spine. Two sets of hands roamed the contours of his body, one set lingering in places while the other made a quick, thorough map of his skin. He was lost in a sea of passion, clinging desperately to the man before him.

When hands settled firmly on his hips and the mouth at his back descended further, he could hardly contain the keening groan from escaping. “Buck up, cupcake,” came the reverberating growl from the Soldier laving vicious attention to his throat before those teeth sunk in, parting skin and sending delicious twinges of pain across the Medic’s nerve-endings.

Not to be outdone, the hands on his hips gripped firmer, pulling his lower half backward against that mouth. He bit his lip to stifle the unmanly squeal when the one behind him put teeth, tongue, lips, and even his nose into play, marking up the Medic's ass vividly before those hands slid down to part the firm globes and he went in for the real prize.

In what must have been perfect coordination, the Soldier covered the Medic's mouth at the exact moment their backdoor partner ran his tongue down the entirety of the Medic's crack before enclosing his lips around the puckered entrance, flicking just the tip of his tongue across the tightly closed muscles.

The Medic dug his short, trim nails into the back of the Soldier's neck, choking on a gasp at the wholly dirty, erotic pleasure spiraling throughout his body from the man behind him. Said man made a deep, happy noise in his throat before carefully forcing his tongue inside, his large hands kneading the firm flesh of the German's ass. The Soldier broke the kiss to return to the Medic's neck, enclosing his teeth around a mouthful and sucking another bright mark into the pale skin.
Between the assault on both fronts, the Medic was embarrassingly close to blowing his load already. Dropping one hand down and back, his fingers ghosted across the shaved head before running the edge of a nail across the shell of one ear-- a sure fire way to get the man's blood boiling. "N-now, bitte..."

Neither of his partners needed to be asked twice. The Soldier dropped his hands down and hefted the Medic up, who curled his legs around the American's waist, while the Heavy quickly found the bottle of lubricant that had rolled away during their playtime. He quickly greased himself and the American up, before guiding the Soldier's cock to the Medic's hole.
The Medic sucked in a sharp breath when the Soldier thrust in, releasing it with a low groan once that cock was fully seated. The Soldier shifted his grip minutely, the muscles in his arms quaking a bit from the strain. He gave a few shallow thrusts to tease the Medic before pulling back until just the head was inside. The Medic whined and wriggled for a moment, then stilled as he felt the Heavy sidle up behind him, one strong arm curling around him, helping distribute his weight between the two.

The Medic leaned back against the Heavy's chest, teeth sunk into his lower lip. With one arm curled up behind the Heavy's neck and the other firmly clutching the Soldier's shoulder, he held on as best he could while the Heavy adjusted everyone's position. Then, after dropping a kiss to the bruise the Soldier left on the Medic's neck, he aligned his cock alongside the American's and together they slowly slid in, stretching him nearly unbearably. Arching, the Medic pressed down on the intrusion, hissing at the burn. He loved it, the pain and pleasure of being stretched so wide, of his Soldier and his Heavy fitting so well together inside him.

The Heavy held still for a moment after they were fully sheathed, unlike the Soldier, who tried to pick up the pace. Leaning over the Medic's shoulder, the Heavy reached over with his free hand and caught the Soldier by the chin, sealing their lips in a kiss to stall his thrusts temporarily.

Finally, /finally/, the two began to fuck their Medic in earnest. They moved in counter to each other, leaving the Medic breathless and he clung to the Heavy's neck with both arms now, his legs firmly cinched around the Soldier's hips, his heels dug into the man's ass for leverage. The three created a chaotic, divine, wonderfully erratic rhythm, their groans syncing together in a cacophony of lust and love.

The Heavy dropped his free hand down, fingers skimming over the Medic's chest before dipping lower to encircle his painfully hard dick. It didn't take much more than a few tugs before the Medic jerked back and let loose an animalistic cry, coming all over the Heavy's hand and his own chest. The Soldier bit his lip on a grunt, gripping tightly to the Medic's hips as he sawed away at the man's pulsing hole, nearly to his own orgasm.
Struggling to regain his breathing, the Medic dug his toes and fingers tighter into his lovers, spurring them on. "Bitte, fill me up, mein lieblings..." The Soldier didn't need to be told twice; a handful more thrusts and he stuttered to a stop, swallowing down a moan. The Heavy shifted his grip on the Medic, letting the Soldier slide out and lean against the German's chest, before finishing up himself, the way made slicker by the American's release. The Heavy sighed blissfully as he filled up the Medic, holding both men cozily to his enormous frame.

After their labored breathing returned to normal, the Soldier stiffly pulled away from the two and ignored the way the doctor's come clung to his chest hair from the impromptu snuggle fest. "Ladies." He offered a short salute before marching off toward the large bed they had commandeered and set up in the corner of the room.

The Heavy barked out a laugh before scooping the Medic fully into his arms and following after the American. Carefully he deposited the German into the center of the bed before dragging the Soldier from the very edge, and got in himself. As always, it took them a minute to rearrange before settling down for slumber, the Medic curled up against the Heavy's chest, while the Soldier spooned behind him, his fingers curling around the Russian's giant hand and resting on the German's hip.

Right before he fell asleep, the Medic felt the bed shift and blinked open an eye to see his Soldier leaning over and pressing a kiss to their Heavy's forehead, then glancing his way. "Say anything and I'll shove a rocket up your ass, Kraut." There was little hostility behind the threat, though, and all he did as turn his head for a kiss as well, then curled back up for some much needed rest.

2 .

I though this was well done, and I find myself wondering what got these three into this situation, especially since soldiers seemed so adamant about being masculine. Again, well done.

3 .

Because this is so short, I did this for you:

General: Over use of cliched words/phrases such as "roamed the contours of his body" or "kneading the firm flesh." In addition, a few phrases seemed out of place in regards to the tone you set to begin with. The romantic, highly erotic tone is broken with phrases like " marking up the Medic's ass vividly" which just sounds strange. Over abuse of adjectives and adverbs, common these days thanks to Stephanie meyer.

A few things that stood out to me: The first couple of paragraphs were a little confusing because the only setting I got was Medic sandwiched between Heavy and Soldier. I pictured them all laying on their back, loving their medic, and that threw me for a curve when I got to the second paragraph.

This continues being a problem, as it's difficult to picture exactly what is happening because it isn't describe well to begin with.

"After their labored breathing returned to normal, the Soldier stiffly pulled away from the two and ignored the way the doctor's come clung to his chest hair from the impromptu snuggle fest. "Ladies." He offered a short salute before marching off toward the large bed they had commandeered and set up in the corner of the room. "

I had no idea they weren't already on a bed... That first sentence in the excerpt could do without the unneeded attempt at adding any sort of story to this PWP, because it seems a little run on-y.

The grammar is spot on though. Proper use of trouble words, punctuation, etc. Fifth and fourth from the last need an extra space, but pfft that's just like a formatting thing. The actual story was great, and well thought out. And DP? LOVE IT.

4 .

I'm glad you liked it! And thank you for the concrit. <3 I know I tend to get carried away with my purple prose sometimes, hahaha! I need to work on that. I definitely need to get back into practice. I originally penned this as a random little PWP and I got a bit enthused. I'll be working on my pacing and settings, too.

And DP is love, it should be in more stories. I'll get working on some more kinky smut for you guys, soon.

5 .

This is really good, and as for the over-description of stuff... There are lots of authors who do that (not just Meyer). Have you ever read any Tolkien or Nabokov? They spend chapters describing shit. At the same time, you might want to avoid using cliche descriptors(like >3 said).

Oh! And I thought it was very apparent that they were standing up, so there's that.

DP is good for the soul!

6 .

>>5 OH NO YOU DID NOT JUST COMPARE TOLKIEN TO STEPHANIE MEYER

7 .

>>6 Be cool. Meyer's a decent author to some.

As for the subject at hand; OH MY WORD. I lost track of how many times I came reading that!

8 .

6 ... I said that Meyer uses a lot of descriptors, as does Tolkien. The qualities of the two authors were not being compared at all. The message was: describing is what writers do.
Don't be so quick to be butthurt.

So. More DP?

9 .

Some of the wording didn't quite do it for me. I really liked Soldier's interest in Heavy, though. There's not nearly enough Soldier/Heavy lovin' out there, even in the midst of a threesome with Medic.

10 .

My only real complaint would be the use of the phrase "pulsing hole". "Pulsing" just isn't a word that should appear in erotic literature in my opinion, especially when "throbbing" is already ready and willing to be put to use in purple prose of any kind. Other than that, it's all gravy. Also, seconding an interest in Heavy/Solly loving.
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