There was a conversation on Tumblr about whether or not genderbends were transphobic or not. I'm not really sure. If it's someone like Fionna, Cake, Ice Queen, Marshall Lee, Flame Prince, Sir Monochromicorn, or Prince Bubblegum from Adventure Time, most TF2 femclasses, or She-Ra, Princess of Power, then I see it as a non-issue, because they're not the same character as the original...but then, they're not technically a genderbend, either. I'm not really sure.

>>13071

Maybe it's my privilege speaking, but I don't see how they are.

You take the concept of a character and make them the opposite gender.

I don't get it. How are they trasphobic?

>>13072
I guess...thinking about it, when the character IS meant to be the male character, that making them trans* when they have no dysphoria in canon, or making the transition magical and seamless when it isn't irl would be insulting.

But if they're just a separate character who starts out as the opposite sex as the canon one, and then takes on a life of their own, I don't see the problem. Heck, I find Fionna and She-Ra more interesting than Finn and He-Man.

>>13071

Yeah I don't get that one at ALL. Typically genderbends have NOTHING to do with an actual transition from one gender to another, it's basically just remaking the character to be the opposite gender. I personally am made uncomfortable by making characters actually trans* (i.e. showing them with actual transitions and dysphoria), but that's only because it sort of triggers my own dysphoria. But regular ol' genderbends? Hell no, people need to get their panties out of a knot and stop trying to make everything offensive or phobic of something.

> never flown
> never been to Texas
> never seen Sweetheart in real life

Let's fucking do this shit.

>>teacher calls on me for a question
>>in the middle of explaining my response
>>classmate yells out how awkward this is

I need to climb into a hole and never come out. I am terrible at conversing.

>>13077
This, at least cheers me up. You deserve all the good things, Kit.

>>13077

Good luck to you, Kit. Hope things go well.

>>13078

Your classmate is the asshole of a baboon and deserves to be beaten.

>>13078
>>13079

Danke schon, the both of you.

>>13078

Wow, rude. Seems like the only 'awkward' thing was your classmate being a complete douchehat. I mean, who does that?

Okay, so I hate going to Ash Wednesday service, simply because I've thought it as hypocritical since I was eight (Do not disfigure yourselves to show you are fasting, as they do in the synagogues...now everyone come up here and put dirt on your foreheads), but I go for my dad's sake. I don't mind the other holidays so much, but this one just bothers me.

Tonight, though, I had the best moment. The priest put ashes on my head, as usual. When I got home, I looked in the mirror.

Now, it was probably an accident, but I had a freaking Z on my head.

My priest is Zorro, guys.

>>13082
Zorro masquerading as a priest needs to be a comic book.

>>13079
>>13080
Yeah, I just...even my therapist said that was ridiculous, and it just made me more confused than anything. I realized in the past, when people have been insensitive or downright bullies, I'm more confused as to why the hell people would do that in the first place than anything else.

Ever want to throttle your friends because their grammar and spelling is Just. So. Terrible?

One of my old pals from school just used the word 'rashionably'. Oh my god.

I realize not everyone's great in English, even if it's their first language, and I wouldn't say this to his face, but GOD I just have to vent.

>>13086
If I could, I would just run around the world, teaching spelling and grammar wherever I go, and beating it into people until they learned.

LOOK AT MY FRIENDS' POSTS! THEY'RE AWFUL.

>"happy valentinea days everyone. and even to one perso exspecialty hehe i love uou hun. .

>these are the flowers my boyfriendngot me hehe eed cordations and one fake rose . Amd mmm what he said was soo cute."

I mean, I can excuse the ones that are clearly typos, but cordations isn't even close.

>"ok i am going to do a facebook pole for the next 24 hours lol ever believe in double gangers lol i do and here is proof lol look at the two know that they are two different people lol now if you now believe that one is a double ganger like this if you believe they could pass as twins comment and if you believe they are the same person lol share it and see what other people say lol enjoy"

Oh, and awful poets are always amusing.

>"been thinking of my stuff in my life since i lost the woman of my dreams only thing i ca say there is no point in sleeping since i was told she fell out of love with me so i put it in to a poem and this one is for you -------- and no that even though i may not show it i will always love you but either way here is my poem:
my dreams have been shattered
I no longer feel flattered
every second without you
is bad but is wors when it is two
I longer wish to dream
because i've lost my beam
I need you to keep me going
As well as keep the dreams flowing
Baby your my all
so won't you plase give me a call"


Things like this cheer me up. I'm sure that's awful, but the last two are from a guy that I cannot stand, so it's great.

>>13089
...double ganger?
...He means doppelganger. Right?

>>13090
It seems like it, yes.

>>13091
Oh god. So much love for this video.

Hey, question. If I were looking for help, or a tutorial, or whatever, involving nude Left4Dead model posing in Source Film Maker, where the hell would I post? L4D forum is dead, and we don't have a dedicated SFM forum. Would it go under Projects? Gmod?

And a feeling:

I've been working on doing some audio editing, and holy shit, it ended up SO great. So proud of myself.

Cat number one occasionally gnaws important cords and cables into multiple pieces. Latest casualty was my tablet cord.

Cat number two deliberately pisses on clothes, pillows and the couch, but only if they are in the living room. But if it's in the living room, and it's soft, it's getting pissed on.

Cat number one is an absolute menace without cat number two around for him to burn all of his energy on, but I am out of solutions for cat number two.

I have horrendous allergies so I don't even know why we have two cats but god I love them. Sigh.

So, I moved in with Sweetheart and her parents. They aren't charging me rent or anything, so it's pretty cool...

However, they're massive hoarders. They were using her room as storage, and there was stuff piled waist-deep in her closet, which hadn't been gotten into in seven years.

There was dog hair and dust all over the floor, because she couldn't navigate a broom through it, and the mess was just too much for her to tackle on her own.

We finally dug in and got to cleaning, and we've made so much progress it's amazing.

Until today.

Her fucking mother started going through the trash bags, called Sweetheart up, and chewed her a new one for throwing out things we had found in her closet.

Now, since there was shit piled all the Hell up, we weren't sure how badly it was until we started taking a closer look.

What we found were piles of roach droppings in everything. It was absolutely terrible. Hell, we had to get masks and protective equipment to clean in there.

I tried to tell her mother what we had found thanks to the mom's need to pile shit up everywhere, and all she did was scream that Sweetheart isn't 'normal,' she has no way of taking care of herself (untrue), and that she isn't mentally fit to clean out her room (also untrue).

So, we get to handle her bullshit tomorrow.

If she wants to go through that garbage, fine, but I'll be damned if she undoes the hard work we've put in, all because she's a filthy hoarder. Sweetheart deserves a clean place to live, and I'm determined to give it to her.

So the boyfriend and I got invited to a SlutWalk in our area. We were thinking of going until we saw where it was being held - a Pagan temple in OC that is notoriously shitty to trans* women. They have a women-only service (as well as an all-inclusive service; the church is part of a Dianic tradition that has a focus on female empowerment so their Sunday services are women only), but they are apparently turning trans* women away at the door because their "policy" doesn't consider them "real" women. This is the quote (from the presiding priestess) that kills me:

>"This Temple defines Woman as “that human being bearing a naturally created womb.” You do not become something simply because you “identify” with that group. If I am white, I do not become “black” simply because I choose to “identify” with African-Americans. My skin is still white, no matter what I identify with. Women, in our thealogical definition, are those who are born with wombs, the ability to carry on human life, the ability to bleed monthly (of course, there are physical exceptions for those women who for health and physical reasons do not bleed, or who have had their wombs removed due to surgery–we are talking of the general definition of woman, apart from exceptions such as these )."

>"Creating a space inside a body surgically does not make a womb. Woman is not made on an operating table by a man in a white coat with a knife. This is not reality. To be able to “decide” that you are a woman erases all that Woman actually is. It erases reality."

So we make a post to the organizers of SlutWalk to let them know about this, assuming, especially considering they make a point that they are supportive of all gender expressions, that they just didn't know. Ten minutes later, our posts are removed and we're now blocked from the FB wall.

My mom (who is a journalist sort of) has now contacted the organizers telling them that she's going to write a story on it (as she writes for an LGBT column), and that she wants their side of the story before publishing it. Still being ignored.

So we've now started a counter protest against the temple and the organizers since they don't seem to want to give a shit about trans* women, you know, despite this being a feminist movement. We've also gotten in contact with a woman who runs larger SlutWalks who is a transwoman, and we're not the only ones who are pissed.

Things are getting interesting.

>>13101

That sucks three different ways. Seriously.

How's the T going, by the way? Did the pharmacies stop being stupid?


So, fuck Petco. Sweetheart and I were in there the other day, and we saw this little ornate wood turtle flopped over by the side of his tank. His shell was flaking and peeling in giant chunks, which is a sign of shell rot.

On closer inspection, part of his shell was rotted down to the bone.

We decided fuck it, the little guy deserved better. We bought him, and we've started treating him.

Pic related, those white bits are rot.

>>13104
Well the good news is, the SlutWalk finally moved their location after my mom told them that she was going to write a story about it. Turns out the organizer is only 17. Uhhh.

FINALLY did end up getting my T. I had to miss a week, but I ended up getting it shipped from my doctor in LA. Ended up being better, too, because at Target I was paying about $27 for one month's worth, and having it shipped was $30 for four months worth plus needles. So now I can just have it shipped from now on and it'll be fine. Going in on Thursday for my first check up type thing, actually.


Fuck Petco sideways. Poor thing. The Petco by us is pretty okay, because there are a couple of girls that work in there that actually really do care about animals. They work at night when no one else is working in there, so I think they make sure things are okay for the animals even if it isn't their job. But most other Petcos I've seen are horrendous. Ten to twenty rats per tank that isn't even big enough for one rat to be happy. If I had the resources I'd just buy them all but I've got a zoo as it is.


On a side note, went to look at houses for rent today. I really like the one but I'm not sure what the deal with it is considering there's no sign in the yard, and the only picture on the realty site is the outside of the house from Google streetview. Seems fishy but I'm keeping my hopes up.

>>13105

Glad to know the walk's being hosted somewhere else. I never understood why some people use paganism as a veil for man and trans-man bashing.

The lady manager at Petco was wonderful, but...uneducated as far as identifying disease goes. And I want to fucking buy a little happy-trail cage for every single rodent in that store, just so that they can walk around without stepping on each other.

I'm glad things finally got sorted out with that. Best of luck! :)

Yeah, I'd check that house out first...that's sketch as fuck.

>>13106
Augh right? Pet stores are so dangerous for me because I just want to help them ALL.

On the rat note, we found a HUGE cage at Petco on clearance for more than half off... so our boys are moving into a new mansion on Tuesday when I get paid!

Also Kit can I just say that you are so pleasant and I enjoy your posts and I kind of really want to give you a hug okay

Why no, Time Warner, I would HATE to have internet! It's fixed now though.

>>13107

I made the silliest sound ever. You're so sweet, you know that?

I GOT ANGRY ABOUT GENDER ROLES TODAY.

I saw a really awesome notebook binder at Target yesterday. It was teal with lots of little owls on it. I really really really love owls so I was going to get it with my Target gift card from Christmas... but I didn't. And the ONLY reason I didn't get it was because of stupid fucking societal gender roles. I get not only mistaken for a girl, but ARGUED WITH that I am a girl, enough at my school, so I passed up something I really really liked to avoid having to fight people on my gender.

Things got so bad last semester that I had to get councilors and higher ups at the college involved. I single-handedly got a gender neutral, single-stall, locking bathroom put into the biggest building on campus. Which, might I add, the LGBT Rights Club, which I am not a part of because they're all pretentious assholes, took full credit for.

And to make it worse, gender role shit for me is not just male and female. TF2chan is literally the only place on the internet where I am open about being FtM. I used to be open on Tumblr, until I got too sick of being accused of being "fake trans," being accused of being sexist towards women, and being accused of being transphobic because I am "triggered" by porn involving obviously transgender individuals. I eventually made a new account and now, as far as my followers know, I am 100% a "white cis male." Which has its own set of problems apparently.

Tumblr has this fucking attitude like if you are not 110% gung-fucking-ho about something, you're phobic of it. SO SORRY that I'm not happy about the fact that I feel I've been born in the wrong body. I am just SOOO sorry that I want to puke when I look in a mirror naked. I actually saw someone who was trans* (or claiming to be?) call me transphobic because I didn't like trans* porn, as mentioned. He justified it by claiming "I embrace myself and my body." Like anyone trans* who doesn't embrace their body not matching up to their identity is suddenly phobic of themselves. Okay.

So congrats, TF2chan. You are currently the only group of people I have found mature enough to talk to about my transition. Which is amazing, considering I'm not out to practically anyone even within my personal friend group. The only people that know are those who knew me before my transition, boyfriend included.

ARRHJGAHDFHLAKa. Okay I'm sorry. I got angry. I think I'm done venting.

>>13113

As far as Sweetheart and I are concerned, you're a man. The genitals you were born with don't define you, and I'm fucking sick of the notion that it does.

I can't believe that even today, people will argue with you when you say you're one gender or another. And fuck gender roles while we're at it. I have a little cousin who's only ten, and all he wants is a dress so he can be pretty. I don't see a damn thing wrong with it, but when I bought him one, his mother threw it out because it's not 'normal.'

Or that lady at my old job that insisted that Miss Angel was a man, when she's told me she's a woman. Fuck people.

Oh God, fuck Tumblr too. How dare you not want to see porn that makes being trans a fetish? I don't care if someone likes it, but I don't want to see it either. I don't see how that's wrong.

Get your butt over here, you need a hug.

>>13113
Our college's LGBT club sucks too, but for a different reason. All they do is look up funny videos from the internet when they're together. No actual LGBT stuff even going on.

This whole "masculine/feminine-only interests" and "you're/you look too [x] to be [y]" shit hurts both cis and trans* folk, as far as I'm concerned. You don't have to make excuses for why you like something, as long as it doesn't hurt anyone. And owls are adorable, I see just as many men squealing over baby animals as I do women.

Just a little mini vent session:

If any of you here ever plan on auditioning for a play, and get into the play, for the love of god, show up for rehearsals. If, for whatever reason, you cannot make a rehearsal, due to illness or tragedy, or if you have to drop out, then FUCKING TELL SOMEONE. Don't expect us to telepathically know that you're not going to be there.

And if you're not prepared to treat the play seriously, then don't audition, because you're wasting time, and if, god forbid, you get cast and just half-ass your way through it, then that's a role that could otherwise have been filled by someone that truly wants to be there.

When you half-ass it, or don't show up, then the rest of the cast has to pick up your slack, and our roles are already hard enough without having to play yours too.

That is all.

In other feelings, Sweeney Todd rehearsals are going great, and I'm excited to be a part of this play.

>>13116

The #1 reason I don't do plays/musicals anymore. I love love love being on stage but I simply cannot take that much time for rehearsals and such. I did it in high school when I went to a charter school and had nothing better to do, but I just don't have the time anymore. Makes me sad.

Not only did I get accepted into grad school today, but I got an email from both an estranged sibling who hasn't had contact with me in 4 years and from an ex-friend who started ignoring me about a year ago. Coincidences, hurm. Little do they know, they can go fuck themselves.

>you will never casually flirt with sniper by trying to stick pencils and shitup his butt in public
>he will never one day snap and start raping you with pencils
i don't know how much longe ri can fuckING TAKE IT,e4wlkwejofpklQD

>>13118

Hey, congrats on grad school.

>>13120
...look at your life, look at your choices.

>>13120

>>13120

>>friend comes online right as I'm going to bed
>>"hey guess what my boyfriend and best friend aren't online so I've started stabbing myself"
>>plead with him to feel better and put the razor down, but asking him to do so and asking him to go to a psychologist makes him cut more
>>refuses my genuine declarations of caring
>>sends nasty responses to people who send love to him
>>know if he dies I'll be even more suicidal than usual

I don't think I could ever be a psychologist. I need to change majors again.

Argh. So I pay my rent out of a trust fund left to me by my grandfather. Except I don't have full access until I'm 21 (ten months thank god.) Until then, my great uncle has control of it, and while he's nice enough to send rent checks, he's as old as dirt and dumb as a hammer.

I've been trying to get ahold of him all damn week trying to get a bank statement for the trust so I can give it to a realtor for a house my boyfriend and I are trying to rent. So I FINALLY got ahold of him yesterday, but he's on the east coast and I'm on the west, so the bank was closed by the time he called them. So he called them today (at 2pm his time mind you), and it turns out they won't even fax me a bank statement. They have to give it to him, who then has to give it to me. Except he's an old fart who doesn't even know how to fax, much less email, so he has to MAIL me my bank statement. He at least figured out how to send it priority mail, but it's the weekend, so I probably won't have it until Monday. I'm really terrified that this is going to ruin our chances with this house.

Granted, the house has been on the market for a long time apparently due to how close it is to other houses, but damnit I want that house and I'm terrified.

And don't worry, I know I am like the luckiest motherfucker in the world to have my rent covered, so I'm totally grateful for that. But god this old man is frustrating sometimes.

School is making me very tense this semester. My dad has had a very "You MUST get all A's, OR ELSE" mantra ever since I started college, and now he's trying to push me to get on the Dean's List. I can't make friends in my class, everyone seems to only want to be friends with people they knew in high school, and my online friends want me to drop everything when they come online, and claim I hate them if I don't. I'm a Junior, why does this still feel like I'm a Freshman in high school?

>>13118
Hey look, it's the SAME SHIT HAPPENING AGAIN. Apparently not responding to an email is grounds for MORE harassment. Damn shame GMail doesn't do more than filter emails to the trash. It's been months since I've heard from any of these folks and, last I knew, we were through. Also, how did they get my Skype? Thank goodness for the Block feature.

I was fish slapped today.

I'm not even joking.

AAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaa we got the house!!

We talked to our current landlord today and I dunno if she just seemed sad because we always pay our rent on time, but either way I kind of felt bad. She's trying really hard to get our fee down as much as possible (like taking it out of our security deposit) so she's being really nice about it at least.

But aaaaaa new house! More space! Second bedroom! Yard! Dog! I'm so excited holy crap!

The fun part is that my parents are moving April 6th. So I guess we're trying to get out of here ASAP so our move dates aren't too close.

>>13143

Good on you!

It's starting to grind my gears over the fact that people with depression and anxiety are being pushed aside as "desperate, needy, needing buttpats" when a lot of the time, their behavior with other people is just a desire to make themselves feel normal and safe. Many people don't have access to medicine, either for money reasons, or because their relatives have blocked them from getting a prescription, and when you have anxiety and need to have "things are okay, I don't hate you" repeated a lot, you're aware it's illogical to keep asking, but your brain tells you you absolutely need to. I don't think enough people understand that.

>>13146
I was in a similar situation. A friend I've since distanced myself from told me my parents couldn't be abusive because apparently they're obscenely rich and spoil me constantly. Which is not true in the slightest. My dad has a main job and two side jobs, and I've essentially been told as of late "don't consider asking for anything, we can't afford it".

I think for some people medication and therapy isn't needed to move on from their depression, but that gives them no right to tell other people their feelings are invalid because they're having a harder time of it.

A friend of mine was having a movie night so a couple friends and I go over to her house. She brings this guy.
>says he's a teenager from the 16th century
>cries when I beat him at a card game
>Eats all our food. half an apple pie, full 2l of soda, shit tons of pizza
>doesn't pay for any of it
>when he doesn't get food, begs like a dog
> "You don't read homestuck? BLASPHAMY! EVERYONE HAS TO READ HOMESTUCK"
>"don't watch Dr. Who? WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU"
>Extremely overweight
I didn't think people like this even existed. He just makes me rage so fucking hard

Holy shit! I haven't been here in eons thanks to University and life going batshit insane on me, and my old afanfic isn't in the archives!

Reading all the old comments on it REALLY makes me want to work on trying to finish it again, but I'm almost afraid to. I started writing it when I was in a bad headspace, and don't want to fall back into that again... Plus I don't even know if anyone here is interested in reading it anymore...

Yet I feel terrible letting it die like that...

I can't seem to decide if I should leave it dead or at least try to finish something for a change...

On anon for fear of recognition...

>>13152
I feel in a similar way. I've never allowed myself to write or draw much of anything because I write entirely for others, not for myself, and if they don't like it, I feel like a failure. I could write or draw for myself, but whenever I'm happy with something, it ends up being not very good.

Characters don't speak to me, and I worry about that. I always think I'm 100% in control of them, I don't really have a muse. Is that a bad thing?

Boyfriend says, "I love you" while we're cuddling. In one heart stopping moment I think, shit! I say, "You too". But my face was sorta squished so it sounded like "Mmrph you too"

I don't know. We've known each other for a couple years but only have been dating for a week. Haven't even kissed him yet. One one hand happy, on other hand nervous as all hell.

>>13158
If you both love eachother, then you will be happy and nervousness will fade. You have the advantage of having known eachother for years before. Better chances of things working out well.

Apparently the reason none of my relationships stuck so far is because we only really act like close friends, not like significant others. I wasn't having sex with anyone when they broke up with me. I don't know how to act like "more than a friend" with someone but not be sexual.

The reason I haven't had sex is because either I was told at the beginning that we weren't going to have it, because they didn't want to have sex with anyone, which I was fine with, and the people who didn't tell me that weren't interested in negotiating when was the right time and under what conditions. They refused to wear condoms, refused to wait until I was comfortable. And I was within my rights to say no, as well as being not the only person who would do so.

I had to go to the united states for a few weeks because of work.

And holy shit, I'm sorry Americans, but never have I been more happy to live in a country that isn't filled with religious nut-balls.

I mean, some of the people I met there, would be locked up and considered insane where I come from. But in a America, not only do they roam freely, if they forces their beliefs on you, then you are the one told to be open-minded and respectful - not the one forcing their beliefs down your throat.

I met a lot of people, who told me "God is speaking to me. I can hear him talk to me", say that sort of shit, where I'm from, and you would be locked up and diagnosed with schizophrenia.